Phantom ~ [Simon Ghost Riley]

XXX. Reliant

His heart rate never spikes.

Never.

Apart from right now, and it fucking drives him mad.

"I'm gonna fix this, I'm gonna fix this," Soap continues to mutter under his breath. It feels like he's making promises to himself, and Ghost can't blame him for it. Soap never stopped hating himself for the fact that he couldn't be there the first time they saved her. Ghost can imagine how he must feel right now.

Ghost's own heart is in his throat as they reach a ladder that looks like it's going to break apart the moment he'll rest his hand on it. But right now there's not enough time to doubt things like these.

"Up here," he motions for Soap to follow him as he tries the ladder.

The old steel manages to stay put and they both safely make it up there. Ghost gives Soap a hand and pulls him over the edge before they're both up on their feet. Their eyes lock and for a second Ghost can see Soap's mask of confidence drop.

He's scared.

The look in his eyes tells Ghost that he's not sure if it'll be okay this time. He's usually unrealistically positive. The two of them have had endless fights about Soap's attitude, though Soap would probably tell you it was about Ghosts. He'd always say Ghost was too negative, showing no emotion and whatnot, and he'd drive Ghost mad with his over-the-top positive approach.

For the first time, Ghost realized he was waiting to see that look in Soap's eyes. For the first time, he dreads the realistic, scared look peeking through. He's is suddenly aware of the fact that he had been relying on Soap for his own lack of hope.

"Don't do that, man," Ghost mutters into the darkness.

"What..?"

"Don't lose hope."

"I'm trying," Soap says before darting his eyes away from Ghost.

Ghost's hand touches Soap's shoulder with a single tap in an attempt to comfort him. He's not good at this, and Soap knows it.

"I'm gonna fix this," Soap says out loud now.

"We are," Ghost responds, and he means it.

They continue to search the building, coming across endless open rooms full of boxes and desks. Papers covered in dust lie all over the tables and Ghost is once again thankful for the cloth covering his face. He reaches into one of the pockets before giving Soap a tap with his gun.

"Put this on."

Soap doesn't look back at what it is. He simply grabs it from his hand and slides Ghost's spare balaclava over his head. "Thanks," he says as he looks at Ghost, his eyes now partly hidden behind the skull-covered cloth.

"What's this.." Soap says as he reaches a desk. He pulls out a thick yellow folder that holds a number of papers. He pulls all of them out and spreads them out on the stained desk. The papers are filled with endless text, though paperclips cling onto the corner of the pages. Some of the pages have a picture attached, stuck underneath the paperclip.

They're files of people.

Ghost looks through them, his hands digging through the pages to find anything he recognizes. Right when he's about to stop, her name pops up.

A single sheet of paper that has her full name written on the top left.

It's as if his eyes were guided to it like some kind of magnet. Soap notices too, and he immediately ducks down to read more of it. As he does so, Ghost pulls the folder out of his hands, emptying the rest of the contents on the table as well. Ghost starts digging through the loose pictures that have fallen out from their paperclips, and it doesn't take him longer than three seconds to find hers.