"Introductions," Josephine smiled. "I am your Aunt Josephine."
Violet forced a smile, "I am Violet Baudelaire, and these are my siblings, Klaus and Sunny."
"And I am Rowan White," added Rowan. "I've been living with the Baudelaires,"
Rowan had wandered off a bit, and was now examining the kitchen.
"Rowan, move away from the fridge!" she shouted. "It could fall and crush you!"
"Oh, I'm sure you're right about that." The boy exchanged a look with the Baudelaires as he moved out of the kitchen.
"Aunt Josephine, we noticed your doorbell wasn't working," Violet said. "I'm quite good with mechanical devices, and I could help you fix it. After all, if you don't want people to knock-"
"Oh, no, no," Aunt Josephine cut the girl off. "You could get electrocuted!"
The children looked at each other. At least Aunt Josephine was trying, but it appeared she was scared of everything, and the house was freezing cold.
"I've read quite a lot about electrical devices and-" began Klaus.
"No, no, no," Aunt Josephine said.
"I could show you-" Rowan began.
"I said, no, no, no."
"Delmo." Sunny tried, which meant, 'I could bite the doorbell to prove it's harmless.'.
"Delmo?" Aunt Josephine repeated, shocked. "Delmo is not a word, Sunny."
The children shared looks.
Aunt Josephine shook her head in an almost sympathetic manner. "You children must have seen many things."
"Yes, we have." said Violet.
"And you must have many questions." added Aunt Josephine.
"Yes, we do." said Klaus.
"And you must be wondering where to find the answers." she said.
"Yes, we are." said Rowan.
Aunt Josephine gave each child a smile. "In my library, you will find all the answers."
The children looked at each other and smiled.
Klaus began to turn the doorknob.
"Oh, Klaus!" Aunt Josephine pushed his hand away. "Just push on the wood. The doorknob could shatter into a million pieces and one could hit my eye!"
"But-" Klaus began.
"Klaus, just push on the wood like I said. And 'but' is not a sentence."
"You didn't even-" Klaus broke off, deciding it was pointless to argue, and opened the door.
"The answers!" Aunt Josephine exclaimed.
The children smiled. Aunt Josephine may be overly dramatic and afraid of everything, but her library had the answers to all of their questions, and that was good enough.
"Do you have a book that will answer this question?" asked Violet, and then began. "Why is-"
"Grammar!" said Aunt Josephine in delight.
"I'm sorry?" Violet asked.
"Grammar?" Rowan repeated.
"Yes, grammar!" Aunt Josephine said.
"I'm sorry, but I don't-" Klaus began.
"Grammar is the greatest joy in life, don't you agree?" Aunt Josephine asked.
"Yes," Violet nodded, exchanging a look with Klaus.
"Definitely, yes," Rowan said.
"Yes, it is, but I do have one small question," Klaus said.
"Klaus! Grammar!" exclaimed Aunt Josephine.
"Yes, that's what I said. Grammar is the greatest joy in life," Klaus looked at Violet and Rowan.
"No, that's what I said." corrected Aunt Josephine. "You, however, said 'it is'. You should say, 'yes, it is the greatest joy in life'."
"Uh, right." Klaus nodded slightly. "Yes, I understand now. It is the greatest joy in life. But for my question..."
"You can't start a sentence with 'but', Klaus!" exclaimed Aunt Josephine, shocked.
Klaus sighed. "Well, that's nice, but my question was, how can grammar answer our questions?"
Aunt Josephine thought for a second. "Grammar can't help with all your problems." she said at last.
Rowan, Violet, and Klaus looked at each other, exasperated.
"Anyway, children," she continued. "Allow me to show you your room!"
YOU ARE READING
Baudelaires and a White
Fanfiction"I think we should do it." said Rowan quietly as the man opened the door. "Okay." said Violet. "But who are you?" gasped Isadora, sliding into the taxi. The man took a breath. "My name is Lemony Snicket, and I am here to take you away." Would the s...
