This Friend | Yeonbin

11

Soobin P.O.V

I have Yeonjuns number now.

And I have no idea what to text him.

I feel like I made yet another mistake when it comes to him. What I should’ve done is put my number in his phone. Or I should’ve texted him something like Hey as soon as I got his number. That way I’d know there’s a chance he could message me.

It’s on me.

It’s been five days, and I still haven’t thought of anything.

I want it to be the perfect message. I want to ask him to do something I know he’ll say yes to, basically. I’m maybe stressing more than I should, because I know how hard it is for me to make friends.

I’m really scared of messing this up, like I have every other time.

Right now, I’m in Dad’s Mercedes, sitting in the passenger seat. He’s driving me to get a new suit tailored, because there’s this big party coming up at the end of the month.

It’s a ball for the whole Chois empire, including our allies, so I need a suit that actually fits me. It’s such a big deal that Dad has finally slotted in the time for this outing.

Plus, Yeonjun might be at the ball. So I want to look good.

Because maybe I get a bit of a vibe from him. I dunno. Like, sometimes, I feel like he looks at me in a way that doesn’t feel exactly platonic. It’s too intense for that.

It’s not like it matters. Even if he is gay, what I want right now is a friend. It’d be nice to have someone to talk to about that.

If I have the guts to tell him, that is.

As Dad drives, I look out the window. I have headphones in and am on my playlist. It’s a sort of dreary day today. It’s not raining, but I think it could start at any second.

In the distance, I see a fairground. Its candy-coloured lights look especially bright against the gray sky.

And that’s it.

That’s how I’ll ask him out. To a fair.

But that maybe feels a little too date-y. And I don’t want to freak him out. We’re becoming friends, that’s it. If I were straight, what would I do?

I probably wouldn’t ask him to a fair.

Maybe I’d ask him to come over and hang out. We could play some games or something and eat pizza and stuff.

That actually sounds like a dream date to me, but you know, it is also I guess what straight dudes would do to hang out. They might also watch sports, but, ew, no.

For some reason asking him to come over and play games feels off, too.

Dad and Taehyun know I don’t have any friends.

They’d pay super-close attention if I had a guy over, because I haven’t done it in years. Unless they were out of the house.

They do go out most Saturday nights, so most of the time I have the place to myself.

It still doesn’t feel totally right, though. Can I really sneak him into my house just so we can hang out? I feel like it’d be a lot safer to go somewhere where we’re less likely to be seen.

This is the loop I’ve been stuck in for a long time. Nothing fits perfectly.

I’m still thinking about it when Dad pulls into the parking bay in front of the tailor’s. I open a message thread to Yeonjun as I get out of the car.

Hey! Was just wondering if you wanted to come over and play some games this weekend? I have Smash Bros and Mario Kart, and my brother has Mortal Kombat.

I like the rushed nature of it. I think it’ll make him think I haven’t thought about it as much as I have.

I hit send as Dad and I walk into the building.