Messing Up

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Y/N POV

It's been over a week, and I still haven't told Lizzie about the whole meeting up with Mia thing.

I just don't know how to bring it up. Every time I think I gather enough courage to do it during our daily video chats, I see just how much fun Lizzie is apparently having filming and making all kinds of crazy plans for the upcoming holidays, and I chicken out. And the guilt is absolutely eating me up. I'm not one to sneak around behind my significant other's back, even if that's technically not what I was doing, but I had specifically lied to Lizzie (for the first time ever) and I absolutely hate it.

I'm also deeply paranoid that the paparazzi may have noticed I was there, because they're always hiding behind some stupid bush or parked car, and that they're going to spin some stupid story about how I'm cheating on Lizzie with someone. And I know if that happens and Lizzie sees it, it's only going to piss her off even more.

So, today, I have decided that I'm going to put on my big girl pants and I'm going to tell her. Even though I've been staring at my phone for the last half hour, Lizzie's contact details pulled up, anxiously pacing around the kitchen and trying not to empty the contents of my stomach. We're not supposed to talk until later tonight, but I know for a fact that she's got a break from filming today and that this is as good a time as any to do this.

With a groan I tap the screen, making sure the phone is on speaker before resuming my anxious pacing, my muscles absolutely tensing with every unanswered ring. What if I'm just overthinking this? What if she won't be mad?

Ha, yeah, that's just delusional thinking right there, Y/N. This is Lizzie we're talking about. I love everything about her, and I love that she cares, but sometimes she gets a little carried away with her jealousy. And there's no way in hell I'm coming out of this other than in the doghouse.

"Y/N?"

I momentarily freeze at the sound of her voice, my eyes snapping over to stare at my phone screen as I wrack my brain to try and figure out how to speak.

"Baby? Are you there?"

"Yeah, sorry. I was just...thinking. You're not busy, are you?"

I hear shuffling on the other end, and the whatever background noise I'd heard before was now gone, replaced with silence. "No, I'm not busy. You sound upset. Why do you sound upset? Are you okay?"

If I wasn't fixing to piss her off, I'd find her concern endearing. But her worried tone only makes the guilt pooling in the pit of my stomach churn uncomfortably. "I'm fine. I...I just need to talk to you about something."

"Okay. I'm listening."

Chewing on my bottom lip, I slide onto one of the kitchen stools. "You love me, right? Even if I did something stupid without telling you? Something that might make you angry with me?"

She doesn't answer right away, and that makes my heart sink a little. I've never once doubted that Lizzie cares about me, but this is making me think otherwise and the nervousness I thought I'd lost around her suddenly is creeping its way back up my spine. I can physically feel myself reverting back to that stage where my brain questions everything, every little detail suddenly over-analyzed as it tries to come up with a way to protect myself from the impending heartbreak. But I know it's not going to find that lifeline it's looking for. I jumped into this relationship head-first, trusting that Lizzie would always be there to catch me at the bottom. There was no way out of this. If this goes south, I'm done for. I won't be clawing my way out of it like I did last time.

"Y/N, baby, I love you and nothing is ever going to change that. What's going on?"

Then why did you hesitate?

Invisible String (Elizabeth Olsen x Fem Reader)Where stories live. Discover now