ADDICTION [Kakashi x Reader]

1 Kakashi

(art from @obkk_12 on twitter)

The name in the chapter means whose POV it's written on.

My eyes remained on the dirty floor as they had been since... I don't even remember anymore. Now, the dried blood and other suspicious stains were almost invisible to my eyes and I had got used to the stagnant bloody, and humid air. I moved my wrists slightly, flinching when the cuffs rubbed against the wounds they had created. But even then I didn't react at all. I wasn't mad or desperate, not even when they captured me a few weeks ago I think? To be honest, I wasn't sure of how much time had passed since then as the room had no windows and it was only lit up by a dangling light bulb. I didn't even react when I remembered how I got there.

It was all because of a mission. It hadn't been long since I was taken out of the Anbu and put as a captain of a team. I wasn't supposed to take the part for a long time so I didn't really mind, not even when a new chunin was put under my care. After all, I was no longer an Anbu, and deep down, it felt refreshing to have something different to do. Even if some unhealthy habits, thoughts, and feelings may have still remained in me. 

You could say that when the chunin joined us I saw an opportunity in him. He was new and had little experience in real missions. He didn't know the dangers that lurked outside Konoha, waiting for him as soon as he dared to play adult. But as long as I was the captain I could teach him about all this and more. I could perhaps prepare him for the worst, and teach him so that he didn't make the same mistakes I made. But I guess it didn't work too well since I ended up there, all cuffed and bloody.

We were following the trail of a merchant when we got ambushed. The chunin froze and another jonin from the team jumped in to save him while the third member straight up ran away. To date, I still don't blame him for fleeing, after all, that is what the rules stated to do. After all, it was better to lose 2 ninjas than 3, as it meant two fewer captives to take information out of. 

It didn't take me long to react, but it seemed like hours to me. The time stopped as I watched how the jonin and chunin were about to get killed, and all I could think of was my father. He saved his team back in the day even if he knew it meant disregarding the mission. And when he went back to Konoha, people threw at his neck for not having followed the rules. But when I was young and tried to strictly follow the rules I got two of my friends killed and people were still not pleased. So what was the point of rules, then? I loved rules, and I religiously followed them, but not when they were nonsense. Not when it meant abandoning my friends and comrades.

So I didn't hesitate any longer and jumped towards the chunin and jonin, and while I tried to fight the enemies, they managed to escape. But shortly after, a whole group of reinforcements appeared and I was soon overpowered. 

I remembered how I felt then. It was the same I felt now that I was cuffed: absolutely nothing. I had no regrets at all for I knew I had done the right thing, and I had nothing to live for anyway. 

The door of the room opened all of a sudden, making me snap out of my thoughts. But I didn't need to look up to know who it was. It was always her, my torturer. No one else ever came down here. 

My open wounds that were scattered around my naked torso stang just from her presence, and I unconsciously gripped tighter on the chains that held me captive. She walked closer, but I didn't look at her. At least not until she held me forcefully by my hair. This time I couldn't avoid her (e/c) eyes and (shape) brows, nor the way her gaze conveyed so many feelings that I wasn't able to discern, but that still, managed to provoke shivers down my spine. 

She had never told me her name, and even if I hadn't heard it from the people that sometimes accompanied to the door, I would have still known. After all, she was famous in Konoha. Although to be honest, I would have never imagined she'd look so pretty. 

The legend in Konoha had it that she was a shinigami. They said so because she alone must have killed at least 20 of our people. In fact, no one knew much about her because only three people had ever managed to escape from her. Although they lost their sanity ever since. One of the survivors hadn't uttered a word since he was found, the other one killed himself shortly after he was back with his family, and the last one... well, he lost his mind completely and has been in mental care ever since. So, obviously, her name was pretty well-known. People said she had a powerful sharingan that cast a more powerful genjutsu than Itachi's. Some others said she was a monster, a shinigami; and others just said that it must have been a vicious and twisted person who loved inflicting pain. And for the moment, I hadn't seen any weird monster or sharingan, so I'd go with that last one. 

"Something tells me you still refuse to talk," she said, letting go of my head. I didn't say anything, and she didn't either. I heard her fiddling with something, but I refused to look at her. 

Then, she approached me and laid a small knife on my shoulder that slowly ran over my skin without cutting me while she walked around me until she stopped behind me. She then crouched to my level —I knew because I could feel her hot breath against my nape —, and then, she finally used the blade to reopen the healing wounds on my back that she had inflicted just a few days ago. 

I gripped the chains tighter, but it'd take more than that to make me open my mouth. I could feel the blood dripping down my lower back, and although I cringed, I remained immobile. At least until I felt a sudden shock in my body. It was so unexpected that I inevitably let go of a groan.

And again, she touched me with something that gave me another electric shock. The worst of it was that she was hitting my bleeding wounds. So again, although through gritted teeth, I groaned. Her hits and touches weren't even that strong, but the electric shock was enough to make it painful. In fact, ever since I had been there with her, she hadn't been so cruel to me. Not like the people put her to be, at least. Well, she wasn't kind, that was true. But she didn't torture me physically besides some cuts here and there, and some other painful things. However, she barely used brute force. She was more of a talker, you could say... She knew who I was, what happened to me, the things I went through... and what she didn't know... I ended up telling her. Not because she forced it out of my lips. But she somehow managed to make me slip things. Obviously, I only told her stupid small things, but somehow, she was also able to know how I felt as well. As if she knew anyway without me letting it out. 

"Does it hurt?" she asked after having electrocuted me for a while. I didn't say anything again, I didn't want to lie because I had obviously complained, but I didn't want to admit it hurt either "Does it hurt more knowing that Rin probably had it worse?" 

My fist clenched again, and my frown strengthened. I continued to stay shut and just bit my inner lip, but now I couldn't stop thinking about it. She walked in front of me, playing with her fingers that let go of small sparks of electricity, and then she touched my abs, giving me another short shock. But frankly, I didn't care too much now. I honestly deserved this. 

She tilted her head.

"That is an interesting way to cope with this situation," she said, and I finally looked at her (strong/fine) features while arching a brow "Do you think you deserve this for all the people you've killed with the Chidori?" a chill ran down my spine. This is what I meant when I said she could know how I felt. Perhaps, the rumors of her having a special kekkei genkai were true after all "You think that you should endure it until you've felt Rin's pain, don't you?" she said with a small chuckle when she saw the effect her words had on me. 

I slowly looked up at her, at her fiery (e/c) eyes that looked down at me without her previous smile. I frowned, gripped the chains that held me kneeling on the floor in a cross position, and finally talked lowly:

"I don't care what you do to me. I'm ready to die,"

Her brow relaxed, and her smile finally reached her eyes. She crouched in front of me and held my face with both of her hands, getting her face closer to mine until she whispered back to me: 

"Oh, but I'm not prepared to kill you"