bad influence 》h.g.

Eighteen || Screaming

Tuesday, May 10th 2017

It was another morning of waking up with a tear-stained face. Last night was replaying in my head over and over. I knew he kissed other girls and fooled around sometimes, but I never thought he'd go so low as to sleep with someone else. Still, I never thought he'd cheat on me at all so I was proved wrong when I saw him locking lips with Hayley Dunn under the bleachers but hey, don't always judge a book by its cover, right? I wasn't in the mood for anything that day: no laughing and joking, no talking to anyone, no living...

I plugged my earphones into my phone and put on Fallout by Catfish and the Bottlemen as I walked to school, in the hope that Van McCann's voice would lift my spirits enough to disguise my pain. And it worked a little- but not enough. I got to school, and I saw Heidi and Kyle, but I made no effort to talk to them, so they came to me.

"What's wrong?" Kyle asked.

"Nothing." I mumbled, too sad to care how much my voice betrayed my words.

"Ava." Heidi said sternly. I turned my head to look at her and waited for her to say something else. All she did was give me a prompting look.

"I'm just tired, guys. Just leave me alone for a little while." I sighed, walking away from them. They called after me but I ignored them and continued to walk to only God knows where. The school day dragged by slowly and, even though they knew I was upset, Heidi and Kyle never showed up at break or lunch once again. I wasn't sure if I was relieved that they had followed my instruction, or disappointed that they gave in almost instantly. They were up to something, wherever they were going everyday, and it was bugging me. I noticed a lot of other people I was friends with seemed to disappear often too and I was beginning to feel paranoid about it. I could picture them all meeting up somewhere secret and confessing all the things they hated about me, and the only thing stopping me from believing that was Heidi and Kyle because I'd known them both since diapers were fashionable and even though at times I pissed them off, they wouldn't ever do that to me.

I ignored everyone all day, and I was doing a good job of it until, just as the final bell rang to signal the end of school, I was stopped from walking out of the big gates by none other than Jack Gilinsky. "Baby." He smiled, exposing those insanely perfect teeth.

"Hi." I said quietly, avoiding eye contact with him before he leaned in and kissed my lips. I felt a heat in my stomach and I knew it wasn't butterflies. Oh no, this time it was anger: pure, seething anger. As he pulled away, I gritted my teeth to stop myself saying what I was thinking.

"So..." He began, elongating the 'o'. "Last night was great." I nodded bluntly in response. "Do you wanna go for round two tonight?" He smirked, oblivious to my obvious negative mood.

"Can't." I mumbled, expressionless. His face dropped a little.

"Why not?" He pouted playfully. Usually, I would've melted right there and then at how adorable he looked, and he knew it. But this time it didn't bother me.

"I'm busy." I shrugged coldly. He frowned and tilted his head to the side a little as he stared at me intently, stroking his chin.

"What's up with you?" He asked, a little less kindly than before.

"Nothing, I'm just busy." I spat.

"So why are you talking to me like that?" He frowned, trying to intimidate me with his deep voice and towering height.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I sighed, almost trying to piss him off.

"You do, and it's bothering me."

"I'm sure you'll live." I said sarcastically, before side-stepping him and walking home without waiting for his response. As I walked through the front door of my house, I threw my bag on the floor and let myself fall to the ground with it, before letting out the huge scream of frustration that had been crushing my lungs all day.

"Ava? Ava, honey are you okay?!" I heard my mother's frantic voice call from down the hallway. The sound of her scurrying footsteps got louder and louder as she approached. Shit. I'd forgotten she only had a half-day shift. I wanted to get up quickly, wipe my teary eyes and tell her I was fine, but my throat was raw, my heart was broken and my body was just too tired to fight it. Besides, I don't think I could come up with a reasonable explanation for my short-lived shrieking session. She rushed over to me and knelt down in front of my, cupping my cheek with her hand.

"What's wrong, Ave?" She asked softly. I felt the tears threaten to spill over so I looked to the ceiling, trying not to blink as I bit the inside of my cheek and breathed out deeply. I considered telling my mother about Jack's devious ways. I figured she'd be just as heartbroken as me- she loved Jack like he was her own son. I didn't know if I could physically tell her even if I tried because she'd be so upset, but I didn't want to, nor knew how to lie about this one either. So I just replaced a few words with some others.

"It's me and Jack." I sighed, letting the tears go and quickly wiping them with my sleeve.

"What do you mean? What did he do? What did you do?" She asked worriedly.

"Nothing, nothing! It's just that... He's been offered an eight week training programme in California as part of a football scholarship and I'm happy for him, and he's going. But I'm just gonna miss him a lot, mom." I couldn't believe how naturally the words came. The looked at me for a few moments before she smiled.

"Aw, honey! I know you're gonna miss him but you'll be okay, I'm sure he'll stay in touch while he's away. It's not forever, only a little while." She chuckled, hugging me, making me blush. I nodded in all the right places while she gave me a lecture about how dad used to travel around the country for work for long periods of time and she missed him a lot but he called her every night which made the days pass quicker as she had something to look forward to.

When she was done, I headed upstairs and threw myself face down onto my bed, too tired to move. And I guess I ended up falling asleep too, because when I opened my eyes, I was being called for dinner. I sighed and trudged downstairs, I wasnt hungry.

Sorry, guys, I have serious writer's block as you can probably tell by this chapter:(