Bucky's Choice

Chapter 30

Bucky slowly comes around and hears some bustling in the kitchen. It takes him a minute or so to realize where he is. He opens his eyes and sees he's laying down on Kelsey's couch. As he looks around, he starts remembering the night before. The kiss with Kelsey, the fight, Steve hitting him, everything. When he looks in the kitchen he is surprised to see Nat sitting at the island. "Well, look who decided to wake up." "Hey Nat. Sorry about barging in like this." "Don't worry about it, Kelsey told me what happened. Our guest room is there if you need it sweetie." "Where's Kels?" "She had to work this morning. Didn't want to wake you up so she asked that I make sure you get up ok." His stomach growls loudly and Nat chuckles at the sound. "Let's go get some breakfast for you." She looks at her watch then looks back at Bucky. "Lunch." Lunch? He looks at his phone at sure enough its past 1pm. "Shit. I have to get to work and.." "Don't worry. Kelsey called there and they aren't expecting you till later. C'mon lazy bones." After a quick shower and change of clothes, they go to a small diner near her place. "This is nice." "Yea. Nice little hole in the wall where no one bothers you, no matter who you are." Once they have ordered they sit in an awkward silence. "Nat, I..." "Look Bucky, you don't have to explain anything to me. Like I told you before, I know my place in her heart. All that's left is for you to decide what's your place." "How are you so, so ok with this?" Nat thinks about her answer. "Well, first, I'm not Steve." Bucky can't help but laugh at that jab. "Second, I knew when I decided to be with Kelsey that she has an amazing and open heart that has the capacity and strength to love. That her love and feelings for me were genuine and unwavering. Her biggest strength can also be her biggest fault though. Her selflessness." Bucky can't help but feel emotional and remember when him and Kelsey first got together. "I know that you love Steve very much. And I do know that he does love you very much. The question is, is that enough? Is the love between you enough for Steve to allow you to also love Kelsey?" He hangs his head in his hands. "It used to be." "Yes, and look what happened when you left the picture. You do understand that if you stay with Steve, most likely you can't have Kelsey. Not because neither of you want each other, but Steve won't let you. He would always have doubts and be jealous. And that type of relationship never works when you have those lingering in the background." Bucky takes pause as he listens to Nat. Would Steve be willing to share again? "I feel like no matter what I do, I will hurt someone." "That's life sweetie. I had a choice once. To stay with my family that I loved and have died for, or I take a chance at real love. And I haven't regretted my choice for one moment." "What was the deciding factor?" He knows she is referring to when she left the Avengers years ago. Nat reaches into her purse and pulls out an old letter. "I was given this by Bruce about six months after Kelsey left. It was a note she had written me the night she left. Bruce was told to give it to me when he knew I needed it." She hands Bucky the letter. "Don't read it here. Read it when your in a safe pace and alone." They finish up and make their way back to the condo. "Nat, thanks for lunch and the advice." "No problem. You're sure you're gonna be ok?" "Yea, eventually." She kisses him on the cheek and he hops on his bike and goes to work as Nat goes home. 

"Alright Mr. Shaw that's all the time we have for today." Kelsey stands up and escorts her client to the front lobby. "Julia will set up your next appointment ok?" "Thank you again Dr. Romanoff." "My pleasure." She goes back to her office and checks her schedule. She sees she is free for the next couple of hours. She goes back out to the lobby and checks on Julia. "Hey, since we have a some free time, do you wanna go to the deli and grab us some lunches?" "Sure Kelsey, the usual?" "Sounds good. Use the company car and the card." "Okay, see ya in a bit!" As she walks out she turns around suddenly. "Oh, before I forget, a Mr. Grant Stevens asked to see you today. He should be in a couple of minutes. He already filled out the paperwork online and everything." "Oh, I didn't see him on the schedule." "Check now." She checks and now he pops up. "Oh, well, I guess take your time getting lunch." "You gonna be ok by yourself?" "Oh yea. Ms. Carmen is next door and Mr. Hewlett is across the way. I'll be fine." "OK. See ya in a bit." Kelsey walks back to her office and prepares for her next client. She reviews his forms, which are scarce. "Seems you don't like revealing information about yourself do you Mr. Stevens." She hears a knock on her door and she straightens up her spine. "Come in." When the door opens, she is shocked to see Steve coming through the door. "What the hell are you doing here?" "I'm your next client. Grant Stevens." Oh god, she suddenly remembers his full name, Steven Grant Rogers. "Are you insane? Why are you here?" "I need help." "No shit sherlock. But why me? You do realize that I can't treat you because we have had a prior relationship." "I know, but I don't think I can talk to anyone else about this." Kelsey thinks long and hard weather or not she could do this. As always her need t help people wins out. "Ok, but I have a few conditions." Steve sits down and looks at Kelsey. "Name them." "If we do this, you will not address me as Kelsey, but as Doctor or ma'am." "Yes Ma'am." "When speaking of your past, if you need to reference me, you will refer to me as the woman." "Anything else?" "I will not answer any direct questions about myself. This is about you." "Yes Ma'am." Kelsey opens up her notebook and takes a deep breath. "Ok Mr. Stevens, where would you like to begin?"