I'm sorry to I love you | COMPLETED

#64: All my fault.

Chapter Sixty-Four: "All my fault."

"Her injury has been sutured and she just needs to stay overnight for observation and nothing changes we can discharge her tomorrow." The doctor said much to their relief. "The wound needs to be cleansed and dressed everyday so the nurse will show you how later. It would be preferable if someone who lives with her learns it."

"I'll do it." Jisoo volunteered.

"That would be great. Thank you."

"How is she now, doctor?" Jungkook asked.

"She is better. Physically everything will be well soon. She just needs a lot of rest to energise herself. Her wound will heal within a few weeks. But mentally, I can't say. She is shaken up pretty bad. I'm afraid the experience is a little traumatic for her." He replied sadly.

Jimin held Jungkook's arm to remind him to stay strong. "Can we see her?" He asked.

"She has been shifted to the ward and it will be possible but she has a request," the doctor said. "She doesn't want to see anyone. At least not now."

"What?" Taehyung asked wide-eyed. "Why not?"

"It's a common response from such patients. To others it may seem small but the even the slightest sexual assault can rattle the victim. There's a question of what might have happened if they hadn't gotten away. There were two possibilities for her. She would have been either killed or raped or both from the look of it. Thankfully, none of those happened but what if it had? So her trauma is valid. I think you should give her some time." The doctor advised before leaving.

"What do we do?" Jennie asked, worried. "I don't want to leave her alone like that."

"Let's give her time like the doctor said. Maybe she's not comfortable to have people around her. Or she's tired. Two of us should stay here. The rest of us should go back home and come back tomorrow." Yoongi said.

"I'll stay." Jungkook voiced out immediately.

"Me too," Hobi said. "I've already seen her so maybe she won't mind letting me in."

"Can I stay too?" Lisa asked. "Please?"

"Alright, the three of you stay. We'll come back the first thing tomorrow." Jin said, allowing Lisa to stay as well.

"What if he comes back?" Jennie asked worriedly. "Is it safe here?"

"I think it should safe." Hobi replied. "There are three bodyguards at the entrance of the VIP floor and two right outside her ward. The police is also alerted."

"Then it's settled. Let's go. We'll give you a ride home," Namjoon added to Jennie and Jisoo. "It isn't safe for you to go alone." The girls nodded and followed the rest of the team outside, leaving Lisa with Jungkook and Hobi.

"I'm going to get some water. You look like you need some." Hobi said, looking at Jungkook's pale face. 

The maknae nodded weakly. "Thanks hyung." He gave him a smile that didn't reach his doe eyes. Hobi smiled back and left to buy a bottle from the vending machine at the end of the hallway.

"Hey, relax. It's going to be okay." Lisa told Jungkook who was sitting beside her. "Take a nap or something."

"I wish I could but I can't sleep when I'm worried." He replied.

"How about a walk?" Hobi asked, entering the room with said water bottle. Jungkook seemed to ponder over the suggestion for a second and nodded. "Yeah I'll do that." He grabbed the bottle from Hobi and walked out of the room to the roof garden.

"He'd be alright right?" Lisa asked.

"Yea, he would." Hobi replied. He was their golden maknae after all.

-

"This is all my fault," Jisoo said sadly when she watched Rosé walk towards her room and shut the door in the Blackpink house. It had been a week since Rosé's discharge from the hospital. However, the nightmare continued on not just for Rosé, but for the BTS and Blackpink members as well.

Rosé had taken the situation to have reduced her self-worth just like they worried. She felt disgusted and frustrated. Jungkook was ultimately the most affected among the ten of them because Rosé had felt undeserving of him as well. The only time she talked to him was to tell him to let her go. To move on. To forget her.

Jungkook felt his world crash over him when he heard those monotonous words from her. Her voice lacked tone and her face lacked expression. But her eyes. Her eyes held emotions. It held sadness, frustration, anger and sorrow. He could see how she was forcing the words out of her. He knew she still loved him and that was the only fact that kept him sane.

Over the week at home, Rosé rarely talked. She was not angry with her members but she just couldn't bring herself to converse. They were the only people she let close to her.She allowed Lisa to sleep in with her, Jisoo to dress her wound and Jennie to feed her some food during the few times she actually ate because she had lost appetite. However, she had completely halted the contact between the other BTS members as well. No calls from them or any of her close friends were answered by her. She had lost weight and stayed cooped up in her room. The only times she actually went out was for her therapy which didn't really help much but then again she had only gone for two sessions as it was arranged for twice a week.

"What do you mean unnie?" Lisa asked Jisoo.

"If only I had not overreacted and stopped talking to her just because she hid something from us, she wouldn't have stayed out so late. They wouldn't have been able to get to her." Jisoo replied. "You think I'm right don't you?" She added when Lisa did not say anything. Jisoo couldn't get rid of the guilt she felt even though Rosé had forgiven her. Well not in words, but when Jisoo's apologised to her, she just kissed her cheek and went back to staring at the wall.

The maknae hesitated before answering. She chose her words carefully as she spoke. "It's not entirely your fault. Sure it set the stage but you didn't know what would happen."

"I should have!" Jisoo argued. "The issue I was even mad about was that she was in danger and didn't tell me. I knew a person who wanted to kill her was on the loose and I didn't even bother to tell her to be careful. I was selfish."

"Unnie, don't beat yourself up. What's happened has happened. No matter what, those idiots shouldn't have touched Rosie. Nothing can excuse their actions." Lisa said bitterly. "Besides, you know what Rosé always told us when we feel guilty?"

"Let the guilt teach you how to act next time." Jisoo recited.

"Exactly. You have to forgive yourself." Lisa smiled.

"You're all grown up now aren't you?" Jisoo ruffled her hair.

"Oh come on! I'm only a month younger than Chaeng. But you talk to me like I'm a kid and Rosé like she's the most mature person on earth." Lisa huffed.

"Well she kind of is." Jisoo reminded.

"I guess..." Lisa pouted and the moment of relaxation was over when they saw Jennie bringing up a tray of food up to Rosé's room. They didn't know how long this was going to continue but they wouldn't mind it if it meant she would get better because ultimately, that's what mattered.