𝕋𝕙𝕖 ℙ𝕠𝕥𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕋𝕨𝕚𝕟𝕤||𝔻𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕠 𝕄𝕒𝕝𝕗𝕠𝕪 [𝟚]

Defense Against the Dark Arts

We were in the DADA classroom. I was sitting next to Pansy, Daphne, and Isa, with Blaise and Draco sitting behind us.

Then, the professor, Gilderoy Lockhart, came and spoke up. "Let me introduce you to your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher: me, Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League and the five times winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award. But I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!"

He laughed. No on laughed at his joke. However, most girls, including Hermione, were swooning over him. 

"Don't you think he's cute?" Daphne whispered to me. 

I blinked, startled. "Uh, yeah. He does have good looks." I wasn't exactly lying, Lockhart really had his looks. 

"I've read all his books," Pansy bragged. I rolled my eyes. Who haven't?

"Same!" I said, trying to sound excited.  

"He's amazing!" Isa gushed, staring at the professor.

I didn't like pretending to like Lockhart. But everyone seemed to be swooning over him and I don't like being left out. 

"I see you've all brought a complete set of my books! Well done. I thought we'd start today with a little quiz. Nothing to worry about. Just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in." Lockhart announce with a grin. "You have thirty minutes."

I rolled my eyes. What a self-obsessed bitch.

The test were passed out. I looked at the question.

What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite colour? 

What the fucking hell?

Well, good thing I've read all his books. I finished the questions easily.

The time was up and Lockhart took all our test sheets.

"Tut, tut. Hardly any of you knew the answers to these questions. But, Miss Annabelle Potter knew that my favourite colour is lilac. And, Miss Hermione Granger remembered that my secret ambition  is to rid the world of evil and market my own range of hair care potions. Good girls." Lockhart said. Hermione beamed and I fake smiled. 

The "DADA professor's" (if he actually even has practice in the subject) face suddenly darkened. "Now....be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizard kind! You may find yourself facing your own worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall whilst I'm here." he announced, turning to a cage which was covered with a piece of fabric. Everyone leaned forwards, eager to see what was inside.

"I must ask you not to scream. It might provoke them." Lockhart said as he pulled the fabric off the cage. Inside were a bunch of blue pixies.

Cornish pixies

"Cornish pixies?" Seamus asked loudly.

Chuckles filled the room.

"Freshly caught Cornish pixies." Lockhart corrected.

Seamus snorted with laughter.

"Laugh if you will, Mr. Finnegan, but pixies can be devilishly tricky little blighters. Let's see what you make of them now!" Lockhart released the blue pixies.

The pixies rocket about, knocking bottles of ink and piles of books. Two of them takes Neville by his ears and hangs him on top of the chandelier. 

"Come on now, round them up, round them up. They're only pixies." Lockhart took out his wand. "Peskipiski Pesternomi!"

Nothing happens.

He looks frightened as a pixie flew at him and took his wand. He turned away and ran towards the exit. 

"I'll just leave you four to just nip the rest of them back into their cage." he left.

We were stunned.  Ron swatted at a pixie clawing at his ear.

"What do we do?" Ron yelled.

I pulled out my wand, as did Hermione.

"Immobilus!" we shouted.

The pixies all froze. Neville dropped down.

"Why is it always me?" he groaned.

𓅓𓆙𓅓𓆙𓅓𓆙

We were walking down the corridor.

"Can you believe him?" Ron scoffed.

"I'm sure Professor Lockhart just wanted to give us some hands-one experience." Hermione defended him.

"Hands on? Hermione, he didn't have a clue what he was doing." Harry said, annoyed.

"Rubbish. Read his books. You'll see all the amazing things he's done." Hermione rolled her eyes.

"He says he's done." muttered Ron.

"Besides. I've read his books. All the things he did does seem fantastic." I said.

Hermione smirked.

"But, somehow, it seems fake." I added hastily. 

Hermione frowned and Harry and Ron grinned.

(A/N: God I hate Lockhart. That's all I have to say.)

Word count: 738