All Mine | d.m. (DISCONTINUED)

27

A/N: Okay so I'm on vacation and my uploading can go one of two ways. 1. I write so much and upload at least once everyday or 2. I barely upload and you guys think I'm dead. I guess we'll have to wait a find out. (DUDE I MEANT TO PUBLISH THIS ON SUNDAY AND ITS LITERLY WEDNSDAY LMAO) I literally can't wait to finish this. Not that it hasn't been fun to write but I have the ending planned out and I think its one of the best ideas I've ever had in my life. And when I say that I'm being 200% honest.

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"You don't know that."

"Sure." I say sarcastically and turn to walk out of the bathroom.

"Peyton!" She yells.

"What?!" I whip my body around and look back at her.

"Don't say that." Pansy scolds.

"Say what?"

"Sure." She mimics me.

"Why not? It's not even close to a curse word. Plus you curse all the time." I point at her, taking a step closer to her.

"Do you not think you're pretty?" 

"What?" 

"Why don't you think River would like you?"

"Because why would he?"

I think back to all the times we've hung out and the sound of his laugh when I did something stupid. He couldn't possibly like me, I'm just his stupid, little friend. My mind flashes back to one time in Alayna's dorm.

(Flashback)

"Hold on I'll be right back." Alayna says, standing up off her bed and walking out of the room. 

I'm laying on Emmy's bed, a couple days before winter break, holding a book up over my head. River flops down next to me, causing me to jump, which is hidden by the bounciness of the bed. I giggle, not being able to hold it in.

"What's so funny?" River asks.

"Nothing." I shake my head.

"No," River wines, poking my side, "Tell me!"

"It's nothing." I laugh. River sighs a very dramatic sigh and pushes himself up on his elbows.

"Hey Peyton?" He asks softly.

"Yeah?" I turn my head to look at him and our eyes meet. Please don't be as red as a tomato, I plead myself.

"You know how you like me?" I feel my face turn super red, and there's no pleading it to go away now.

"Um, yeah?"

"Well, I was-" He starts but stops when the door opens and Alayna skips in.

"Did I miss anything?" She asks all cheerfully, and sits down on the end of her bed.

"No." River says sharply, moving back to Alayna's bed, opposite of me. I look at him, hoping to meet his glance again but he watches Alayna with his full concentration. "What was that about?"

"Oh, Kendra just wanted me to talk to her real quick." She says briefly looking down at her nails. "My nails are starting to get old. Hey Peyton, do you think Pansy would do them again?"

"Huh?" I look back to Alayna hearing my name in the conversation. "Oh, um, yeah, probably. I can ask her tonight."

"Okie!" Alayna says.

"I um, need to do something. See you guys tomorrow." River says, walking out of the room, not once looking at me.

(End of Flashback)

"It's whatever Pansy." I shrug.

"No, Peyton it's not 'whatever'. It's important." Pansy says. She's walked closer to me now.

"Leave it alone." I say shaking my head. "It's my life."

"But I care." 

"I don't want to talk about it. Leave it alone please." I plead.

"No. Do you not think you're pretty?"

"No."

"Then why do you think River wouldn't date you?"

"That's not what I'm saying."

"Then what are you saying."

I take a moment to take a few deep breaths. 

"Maybe I  don't want to date him." I point to my chest.

"I thought you liked him." Pansy shoots back.

"I do."

"So.." Pansy pries.

"So maybe I don't want to be exactly like you."

"Why would that make you like me?"

"I don't know Pansy. All I know is that lately you've been trying to get me to do things you do and wear the things you wear."

"I haven't."

"Yes. You. Have." I choke.

"But you agree."

"Because I don't want to hurt your feelings."

"Since when do you care about my feelings?"

"Since FOREVER Pansy." I scream. Pansy flinches. "I'm not cold hearted like you, okay? I'm not you. I'm 'Pansy twin sister'. That's it. Nothing more than your sister."

"That's not true."

"Maybe for you it isn't."

I turn back around and move out of the room, ignoring Pansy's calling. My vision gets blurry and tears threaten to spill over.

I practically skip down the steps and turn to go to the common room door. All of a sudden I slam into a body. They stumble backwards and I fall down, hitting my butt hard. 

"Peyton?" They call softly. I look up and make out a figure with bright blonde hair. "You okay?" Draco asks.

"Do I look okay?" I scoff. I immediately regret my snobbiness since Draco didn't do anything.

"Not really." He admits. Warm tear drip slowly down my face as I stand up.

"What happened?"

"Nothing."

"Doesn't look like nothing."

"It's not important." Just then Crabbe and Goyle come up behind Draco.

"What you got here?" Crabbe asks.

"Nothing." I repeat and turn around to walk away.

"Peyton." Draco grabs my wrist. I turn back around. "Did you fight with Pansy?"

"Don't worry. She's fine." I scoff, not being able to help myself.

"I wasn't asking about her."

"You kinda were."

Draco stand there for a moment, probably debating whether to go comfort Pansy or scold me. I wipe my tears off my face. "Can I go now?" I pull my arm out of his grasp. He lets it go easily.

"Yeah. Sorry." Draco says softly, now that Crabbe and Goyle have walked away. "Don't, um, bump into anyone. Okay?"

"Whatever." I say, my voice cracking.

I walk off and out of the portrait hole. I get many looks but I keep walking not completely sure where I'm going. I end up in a hallway, with no one but me. Good, no one my age gets enough privacy.

I lean back on the wall and slide down. My head falls down to my knees as I let out almost silent sobs.

Stop being so overreactive, Peyton. I tell myself. You're fine and there's no reason to be crying.

I continue to will myself to stop crying and I hear foot steps walking closer to me.