Falling Asleep On a Stranger (Pierce the Veil Fanfiction)

Chapter 6

“Give me your blades,” Vic says.

    “I- I can’t,” I mumble.

    “Right now or I am searching your bag.”

    I go to my bag and dig around looking for the two or three razor blades I have hidden, then I walk to the bathroom and grab the broken razor. I look at Vic in the eyes before I let the blades drop into his hand.    

    I go and sit on the couch and turn on the television. I don’t want to talk to Vic. I let the words of the TV echo in my mind, in one ear and out the other. I zone out and I let the light shine into my eyes. I feel Vic sit next to me but I keep my eyes on the walls. He puts his arm around me and pulls me close to him. I don’t even know why he makes an effort. I’m not his daughter and I guess I never will be. I will never be apart of anyones family. I’m to fucked up for that. I need to kill myself.

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    I follow Vic into the studio while listening to Mayday Parade through the headphones of Vic’s phone. I can’t help but think that he hates me. Maybe its because we keep getting in fights or maybe its because I’m too rebellious. I hate to admit it though. I need Vic right now. He is unchanging and he actually listens to me, even over the stupid stuff.   

    “Hey Tanner,” Tony nods at me.

    “Hey,” I say emotionless.

    I watch all four of them sit down and go over lyrics and melodies of their new album. Vic keeps reminding me that I can’t tell anyone about the songs. I know. Besides, who am I going to tell, it’s not like I even have friends.

    I pick at the scabs on my arms, it has been a week or so since Vic took my blades, and I haven't gotten my hands on another one. I scratch until I see Jaime look at me.

    “Umm Tanner, you’re bleeding.”

    “Oh,” I look at my arm and see the scabs pulled away from my skin. I stand up to find a bathroom and wash away the blood. I feel Vic’s presence behind me.

    “You okay?”

    “Of course, I was just scratching,” I find the ladies restroom and run my hand under the water. I look at myself in the mirror. I gained so much weight lately. I need to work out more. I lift my shirt and pinch my fat. Wow.

    I walk back into the studio and see a man with a brown beard standing there. Vic has a look of happiness on his face till I walk in. He looks at me and his smile melts.

    “Tanner, can I talk to you in the hallway?” he asks while standing up and wiping his hands on his pants. I follow him back out the door, waiting for it to click shut. He places his hands on my shoulders and looks me in the eyes. “Were going on tour and I know thats going to be hard for you because I can’t just leave you behind, but I don’t want you to leave your friends behind. And school,” he puts his head in his hands. “What are we going to do about school?” I could see the distress in Vic’s eyes. I wanted to help him. “Maybe we shouldn’t go on this tour and-” I cut Vic off.

    “Vic, don’t worry about it. I don’t have any friends and I can always do online school.” I see the tension in him fade away.

    “Thank you for understanding,” he says softly.

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    The tour was in a few days and I had already said bye to Luke and Catherine at school, but we promised to stay in contact.

    The day before the tour was hectic with lots of packing and having to load up all the gear. I hope the tour will be a good time for me to get to know Jaime, Mike and Tony a little better. Hell, even Vic. I barely knew anything about him and vice versa.