Teach Me How To Love

Part 8 ~ Perfect in Every Way

NEXT DAY

I spent 30 minues yesterday looking for my phone outside in the bushes. I don't know what made me throw it out of the window. Michael's message was so sweet . . . ugh! . . but I don't wanna fall for him! I know guys like him . . I know how they are. . they're good looking and think they can get all the girls. My heart is too weak for that kind of stuff . . . I can't fall for a guy knowing that I could never have him all to myself. . . . I mean, how many women does he text all day? . . how many women do get a phonecall from him at the end of the day? . . . only god knows.

That woman outside the restaurant was a warning. A warning from the man upstairs telling me that I should keep my distance. I usually don't believe in that kind of stuff but when it comes to love you gotta be careful. . . lord knows I've been living with a broken heart more than once . .

Michael is out of my league . . and by that I mean he's too handsome for me. I'm not saying I'm ugly or anything, I like my looks and I'm confident with the way I look but Michael is way up there . . . what he needs is a perfect looking woman . . a model of some sort . . perfect in every way. . and let's face it, I'm far from perfect. I'm too insecure when it comes to my heart. It has been broken too many times . . .

I need to get his perfect eyes, his cute nose, his gorgeous lips, his snow white teeth, his adorable voice and his goddamn sexy hair out of my head . . . . oh, and his hands . . his full, perfectly shaped eye brows, the soft curls framing his face . . . . UGH, I need to stop thinking about him! . . he's gone . . he's erased . . he's out of my mind. . . from this minute on!

I stop on my way back to the kitchen and look at myself in the mirror. One day a man will come into my life and I will feel good about it. No women lurking outside the restaurant telling me that he's hers . . . no sign from upstairs that I shouldn't fall in love . . . . everything will be good . . . the perfect man will step into my life . . . maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow . . . but one day . . . I believe in it.

It's lunch time and I was just about to grab something to eat . . when Michael's little brother Casey walks in with a friend of his. 'Seriously?' I ask god, looking up at the ceiling. . . I was just about to forget about the man and now his little brother is here . . . and by the way, he looks exactly like Michael. . he's like a younger version of him . . . . . . I walk up to their table.

"Hi . . welcome to Stines. . . what would you like to drink?"

Casey looks at the menu card really quick.

"Curly fries and coke . . . 3 portions please . . my brother is gonna be joining us"

DANG. . .

"Oh . . ok . . umm . . coming right up!"

I rush to the kitchen not knowing how to feel. Dammit . . he can't come! . . why the hell is he coming? I wanna get him out of my mind!! . . . . . I walk back to the table with 3 glasses of coke. "Here you go! the food will be ready in just a few" I say and turn around . . . that's when Michael walks in . . . looking right at me . . . darn it . . .

"Hi Destiny"

"Hi . . . Michael"

Why am I not walking? . . why am I still standing here, staring at him? . . I'm like frozen, why the hell am I not moving? . . stop looking at him, Destiny! . . just stop!!

"How are you?" Michael asks, giving me a shy smile. "Hello? . . are you alright?" He asks again, putting his hand on my shoulder. Why does he have to be so handsome? . . why can't he just be ugly? . . that would make it a lot easier for me to ignore him.

"I'm good . . . th-thanks . . ."

"Great"

He takes off his jacket and takes a seat at his brother's table. Now my heart is doing flips and suddenly I'm smiling again. I get it . . I f*cking get it !! . . I have feelings for him . . . feelings I'm trying to ignore as good as I possibly can . . . you may think I'm crazy for acting this way . . yea, you're right, I'm a complicated person, I admit it . . . but you'd understand me better if you saw that man's face . . . he's gorgeous . . and by gorgeous I mean not just gorgeous . . more like a stronger version of gorgeous . . it's like 100x times the usual gorgeous. . . . the gorgeous you would use when you talk about the queen's crown . . . no . . wrong gorgeous . . . ugh . . whatever gorgeous I mean, he's gorgeous . . . . just gorgeous . . . painfully gorgeous.