The Alpha's Boy {Man x Man}

{TWENTY-TWO}

We were back on the farm the next day. I felt awful. My stomach was sick, my head hurt, I was sweating. It wasn't as bad as the first withdrawal. But it was still gross and I didn't want to pick myself up off the couch once I made it into the house.

Riot went out with the animals, I didn't see him, but I noticed his things around, so Preston was out in the fields by the time we got back, and I was thankful for that because it meant I didn't need to stress about Riot being alone and doing all the farm work by himself.

I was weak, and Riot didn't want someone that was weak. It was a thought that was going through my mind every so often. I needed to grow up, I needed to stop doing things without thinking. I didn't want to make a promise to myself that I wasn't ready to keep, but I couldn't help it. If I wanted to keep Riot and stay out of rehab, I would need to get more control over myself than I already had.

I know he didn't think like that, I know he didn't see me as some toy that couldn't be fixed, but I couldn't help but feel that way, because in my eyes Riot was perfect, he was funny, stock, he was everything I wanted to be, and here he was mated to me. It made me feel guilty.

I fell asleep on the couch, a fever definitely holding itself over my body, I had hollow dreams, where everything felt miles away. It was bothersome like nothing was going to get done or finished. I hated dreams like that. Like an itch, you couldn't scratch.

I woke up in the dark, I had must have slept through the guys coming back into the house, I could hear a TV in Prestons' room, low as it spoke, barely a sound. I could also hear water running, so I assumed that Riot was having a shower.

My head still ached, but I got up nonetheless. I walked into Riot's bedroom, feeling less hazy with the smell coming from the bathroom. Everything about Riot was perfect, and though I wanted it to bug me, that even his smell was calming. I didn't let it.

My phone was charging on his nightstand, and I took it, sitting on the bed as I scrolled through texts from Ivan and my dad.

I wouldn't tell them — couldn't tell them about my relapse. I know they needed to know at some point. But not right now, not when everything in me wanted to fall apart at one more pinch in someone's voice at something I've done wrong.

I didn't notice the shower stop, but I did lift my head when the door opened and Riot walked back into the bedroom with a towel over his shoulder and loose, grey sweat pants on.

I didn't want to openly stare at him, look at the water that dripped down his chest and to the waist of his pants. But I couldn't stop myself, I was obviously drawn to him, and fighting myself wasn't one of my strong suites — obviously—

"You're not very stubble, you know that?" My eyes snapped to him, my face burning with heat.

I wanted to grab him, shake him and kiss him. But it was silly of me to think like that when just hours ago I was laying in a bed clinging to what life I had left.

'I wasn't trying to be.' I said, leaning a hand on the bed as he shut the door behind him. I knew nothing would happen, we had only shared a kiss before, but the way my hands started to sweat, the way my heart started to speed up, the way his heart started to speed up made me think something might. I was hopeful, but not holding on to hope as he put his towel in the nearby laundry basket and looked towards me, I couldn't help but notice the way his eyes trialed down, it hit me then what Dad said before we came here.

How skinny, and unhealthy I looked. I didn't see it, but it came rushing into my head making me feel self cautious, and suddenly all the confidence I had, flew out the window and I claimed up, my hand moving to my lap as my eyes looked towards the window - the window that looked to the bedroom I had at the main house.

"Star," Riot said, pulling me from my head, I almost jumped to see how close he had gotten, he was on a knee, kneeling in front of me, his two hands on his legs. I bit my lip, looking down at him. "What's wrong?"

I started to shake my head, but Riot gave me a stern look. 'I don't look how I think I look.' I simply said. Giving a soft sign. He knitted his brows together,

"How do you think you look?"

'Unhealthy.'

He sighed, standing for a moment before sitting beside me on the bed. He took both my hands in his body looking towards me. "I'll be honest, you don't look that healthy. But before you take that as an insult, I want you to think about it. You've been eating more, outside more, sleeping better. The only unhealthy look you have right now is that your hair isn't as full as it could be, Its not something that can really be helped right now."

I went to bow my head, let out a sigh, but Riots hand caught my chin and forced me to look at him. "When I first met you, I thought you were some good for nothing druggy that didn't want help and was forced here by his family because he was trouble. But I see now how wrong I was Alister. I was wrong.

"You're a hard-working, sensitive guy who was lead down the wrong path by trauma, and you try so hard to fight it, I can see it in your eyes, I can see that you don't want to have the demons you're fighting. You're broken, and it's ok if you're broken. We're all broken, and I'm here to help you when you can't help yourself."

My brows furrowed together, I was trying to fight the feelings that swelled in my chest, the pit in my stomach. Nobody has ever said something so... sweet to me before, and I was too awkward to really know how to react to it.

So I did what my instincts told me to do, I leaned forwards, closing the gap between us. My lips touched his and it was like I was on fire, I was going to pull back, stop what I started in pure embarrassment for how I reacted, but just as I was about to pull away Riot leaned in, pressing the kiss deeper.

I was taken aback for a moment before I leaned in to meet him, a hand falling on his shirtless chest. He put a hand on the bed behind me, leaning into the kiss. We broke apart for a moment, I took a deep breath, looking him in the eyes, I sighed, resting my forehead on his for a moment as we looked at each other.

His eyes danced in mine before a small smile pressed on his face, and I couldn't help but mirror it, and relax at the sound of his soft chuckle. Riot lifted his other hand to my cheek, and I felt myself flush even more at the added attention. Riot knew it too, because he smirked again, grabbing into the hair at the nape of my neck now before pressing us closer together, and just like that, I was lost in him, all over again.