Chapter 16

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Emily let JJ clean her up. She let her clean her wounds. She let her wash her hair. She let the blonde take care of her. She almost felt guilty for it. It was so personal and intimate. But she knew it was something JJ needed. Emily summed it up to her maternal instincts kicking in.

JJ tucked Emily in. She brushed the hair out of the brunette's eyes. "I'm so glad that you're still here. You scared me so much today. I know it wasn't your fault. I know that it's just part of the job, but it's still hard."

"I'm sorry I scared you. But I couldn't let that be Reid. Besides, Reid already had his trust. I made the logical decision."

"Always the martyr," JJ whispered as she stared into Emily's dark eyes. Her attention was interrupted when Emily's phone buzzed. She picked it up and passed to Emily, the moment ended. She knew who it was. She crawled into bed with her, which had become a normalcy in the last couple of months.

Emily saw the many messages.

Ramirez: Hey, babe! How's the case going?

Ramirez: Must be a tough one. Have you seen the news? There's this raid in La Plata for this commune and the followers are held as hostages. Insane.

Ramirez: FBI Agent? Em, please reply and tell me that you aren't in La Plata. That it's just a coincidence.

Ramirez: I've been calling your team they won't tell me anything. Darling, don't leave me in the dark.

Ramirez: I need you to reply.

Emily felt a surge of guilt. She quickly replied.

Prentiss: I just got back to the hotel. I was inside the building but the team and I are fine. I'll be home soon.

Remi responded immediately.

Ramirez: Thank god. Do I need to come up there? Are you okay?

Prentiss: I'm fine. Don't come. I'll be home soon. I miss you. Go to bed. I'll be there as soon as I can.

Emily put her phone down. She didn't want to go home. She didn't want Remi to see her like this. She knew how much pity she would get. She wanted to look stronger than this. She didn't want to get into the 'your job is too dangerous' argument again. Especially since it was Remi that was winning.

She dreamt of fire and God. She was sent to hell. Cyrus was there. And previous UnSubs. And other people from her past she swore to forget. She felt the burning hands of all the men she has put away. She felt the violation of all the men she has screwed. Literally and figuratively.

"You've done this to yourself..."

"It's your fault no one loves you..."

"You're a sinner. And sinners get what they deserve..."

"You wanted me to touch you..."

"You're not natural..."

"Who wants to love you? You're just fuckable. That's all you are, Emily. A body. And not even a good one at that."

"I didn't want you..."

"God doesn't love you..."

Words of her past swarmed her. She tried to hide from her past. But the fire always returned. The voices and touching always returned. She thought she almost deserved it.

She woke up dripping with sweat. She felt a warm hands holding her tightly. She expected to see Remi but was surprised to see JJ.

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