Author's Note: I just want to remind all you ladies that Julian is purely human and there is a method to my madness. That is all. :)
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Even if she carried enough strength within her to be one of those bad-ass Alpha Females that rule the forests with an iron paw, her tail was firmly in between her legs tonight.
Julian was here - in her house.
He was going to stay the night.
And the kicker - she was the one who engineered this turn of events.
I must be a glutton for punishment, she thought, unimpressed with herself.
George's wolf, on the other hand, was completely ecstatic. It scampered so much, not knowing how to handle this much excitement. And while her wolf was always happy to spend time with their mate, there was something in the air that increased its elation twenty-fold.
Happy hump day, happy hump mate day, her wolf repeated in a sultry purr that would make even a dominant alpha give pause.
George might have offered Julian a pleasant smile as they walked it, but she knew she was on the brink of a meltdown, complete with pained barking and whining. What the hell was she thinking, inviting him home like this? It was one thing to spend the night together at the hotel - they were stranded after all - but to intentionally invite him into her home to spend the night? Wasn't their steps involved in getting to that point, like getting to know each other, getting closer, and hell, maybe an STD test taken for good measure?
Our mate! Our mate no have fleas. No need test!
George mentally rolled her eyes at her wolf's faith in Julian. What did a wolf know about STDs anyway? Did wolves even get STDs? Probably not. Wolves were exactly know for their promiscuity - their human counterparts on the other hand...
"W-Well, here we are," she began, willing herself to stay calm. Her body wasn't listening so far. "Welcome to my, uh, humble abode."
She found herself holding her breath as he took in the sights of her apartment. "Are you sure this is your house, or a display at Ikea?"
"Huh? What are you talking about?"
"This place is amazing!" She'd never seen his smile so wide. "Like something I'd see in a home decorating magazine or something." He pointed toward the living room. "Do you mind if I look around?"
"Uh..." George couldn't hide her anxiety. "Y-Yeah, I guess."
If he could sense her apprehension, he didn't give any indication of it. Instead, he slipped off his shoes, taking everything in. George took a deep breath, unstrapping her gladiator sandals. As she watched his fingers glide across her glass dining room table, starting at her purple dining room tables in awe.
"This place makes my house look like a rowdy frat house," he admitted, shaking his head in embarrassment. "And we actually tried to do something with it. We should have just asked you to help us?"
"It's nothing much, really." George took pride in the way she decorated her apartment, but she still felt the need to downplay it. "It took me a really hard time to get everything. It's still kind of a work in progress."
"It completely suits you." She watched as he walked over to her living room, admiring the purples, grays, blacks, and soft whites that coloured it. "You even have a lot of books, like I imagined that you would."
"What can I say? I'm a voracious reader." She slowly made her way toward him. "Being a librarian doesn't help my habit either."
"Probably not, no." Julian eyes darted over to the big screen LED TV, his smile growing even bigger. "Damn, what is that, fifty inches? I live with two other guys, and yet all we have is a 37-inch!"
"It was Dominic's idea," she said quietly. "He said if I was going to game, I should game in style. Personally, I think it's too big for my living room, but Dominic can be very persuasive, and by persuavive, I mean annoying persistent."
"I'll trade ya! You can have our small clunker and we'll take your big screen goddess. The three of us will give it a very good home."
"I'm sure you would." George appreciated his attempts at humor, but her anxiety persisted. There was something about having him here in her home that felt intensely personal - intimate. And while she'd already given herself permission to be with him, she didn't know if she'd given permission to ramp things up so quickly. "After all, it's a well-known fact that guys love big screen TVs."
"Ummhmm." As Julian lingered over a familiar cluster of photo frames by the window, her heart nearly stopped. "Aww, is this your grad pic? You look so studious."
"Uh, y-yeah, that it is." Oh God, this is too much... "What gave it away, the funny hat or the tassle?"
"The gown, actually," he snickered. "You aren't wearing a colored robe, so this is your high school graduation, right?"
"Ah..." George really hoped he wouldn't ask her that. "Well, actually, no - it is."
"It isn't?" He looked at her puzzled. "Is it for something else, like a certificate program or something like that? I know some universities do that."
George nervously scratched her head, silently cursing her lycanthropic genes. "No, nothing like that either." Well, here it goes... "It's um...it's my eighth grade graduation picture, actually."
"What was that? You were murmuring, so I didn't catch what you said."
Damn you and your perceptive human hearing! "I said, that's my eighth grade graduation picture, actually."
"Ah, I see - WHAT?!" His bulging eyes made her die a little inside. "That's your eighth grade graduation picture?"
She nodded slightly. "Umhm."
Of course, he wasn't convinced. "Eighth grade - grade eight. As in Elementary school graduation."
"That would be it, yes." Oh God, just shoot me now...
"As in, this photograph was taken fourteen years ago, when you were fourteen?"
"Fifteen years, since my birthday is in October." Allow me to just crawl into a den and die. "But who's counting, right?"
"You haven't changed from this picture at all!" He gave her the once over before staring at the pic again. "You look virtually the same as you did in elementary school! I'm staring at the same person!"
"That's not true," she countered. "I mean, when I graduated from high school, I was five-foot-three, and now I'm five-foot-four. That's got to count for something, right?" His direct stare told her that it didn't count for a damn thing. "What can I say? I guess I just have really good genes - and a lot of luck. But I am twenty-eight years old. I can produce a birth certificate if you like."
"N-No, you don't have to do that." His tension lessened, but didn't completely go away. George kept herself on-guard, hoping for the best but ready for the worst. "It's not that I don't believe you, it's just that...well, it's like you haven't aged at all."
"Maybe not physically, but trust me, I have." Just as she couldn't hide her nervousness earlier, this time, she couldn't hide her sorrow. "Life is most definitely not a straight line."
"Tell me about it." The anxiety ate her more and more as he reached out familar silver picture frame a few inches away - her most prized picture of all. But also the one I find hard to look at... "Aww, you're so cute in this picture! Are these your parents with you?"
"Y-Yes." Her breath nearly hitched. "That's, um, that's me and my parents. I was about four years old when we took that picture."
"Ah..." She watched as his fingers brushed against the dusty glass. She wanted so much to tell him to put it away and find something else to look at, but the words were lost in her throat. I miss them so much...but I don't want to remember how I lost them. And I'm not sure I want him to know either... "You've got the sundress and the sandals going in the picture. Definitely rocking that big kid confidence." Julian looked over to her, eyes warm with recognition. "You look just like your mother."
"Yeah." George blinked back her tears before he could notice, though an unbearable pain radiated from her throat. "She always used to call me her 'miniature twin'. My dad pretty annoyed with the idea of me sharing none of his features."
Julian laughed. "I can imagine. Apparently, my parents argued over which features I took from which parent when I was a baby. It wasn't pretty." He smiled into the frame. "Wow, your dad looks pretty tough. I would probably be in my best interest never to anger him by hurting you."
"My dad was a gentle giant - he looks tough, but he's was very kind and loving." Her eyes filled with tears. "My mom was the you needed to worry about. She was very aggressive when it came to someone hurting me."
"She sounds like my mom, so I know I need to be careful." He continued to hold on the frame, oblivious to her visible sadness. "You look like your close to your parents - very close."
"I was," she managed the whisper, even as the pain threatened to close of her airways. The memories of a little girl deeply in love with her parents flooded her mind, reminding her a happiness she thought she'd long been closed off to. "Very, very close. They were my world..."
"Were?" She watched as the force her words and the sight of her failing to conceal her pain crash into him with mercilessly. "As in...oh my God, I'm sorry, I didn't know..."
"You know what, I think I'd like to slip into something more comfortable, if you don't mind." George quickly wiped the tears from her face. "Just let me do that, and I'll be right back out, okay?"
She scurried off to her room before she really lost it. She barely made it to her bed before the tears flowed freely, and the mournful howl of her wolf echoed within her ears. She couldn't handle this - it was just too much. This was supposed to be her safe place - her inner sanctum, the one place she could be herself without fear of reprisal.
So why did she feel unsafe? He's my mate - shouldn't him being here make me feel safer?
------
So, that's why she doesn't have photos in her office.
This feeling like a total douchebag when it came to being with Georgia business had to stop. This was two-for-two. Last week, he upset her by being an intentional douchebag. This week, he upset her by being an unintentional douchebag, but a douchebag nonetheless.
The way to a woman's heart is not through douchebaggery.
Julian made himself comfy on the couch as his heart ached for Georgia. She lost her parents - he couldn't even begin to understand how profound a loss that could be. His parents were build to last, if their good health and their lack of regular doctor's visits was any indication. And while he realized that not every day was guaranteed and anything could take them at any time, he didn't want to think about that. The point was that he was blessed to have his parents, and Georgia had to go with life without hers.
I'd call my mother right now if it weren't so late, he thought to himself. But I'll definitely do it tomorrow.
Julian remembered as she spoke of them so fondly, even though it must have hurt her to think of them. She must have really loved him - after all, they were her world. Then there was the photograph - a joyful, jubilant girl in the arms of her parents, her mother's lips brushing against her right cheek while her father's lips smashed against her left one.
It may have been a weathered photograph, but pure love radiated from it nonetheless.
Julian sighed deeply, sinking deeper into her couch. How long? How long had she been without her parents? Five years? Ten years? Or did it happen recently? How long had she carried the grief of such a loss on her shoulders? How long had it weighed heavily on her heart? Did Dominic know about it - he was her best friend after all. Or did she simply carry her burden on her own?
Whatever the answer was, it made him want to cry just thinking about how badly it hurt her.
Once again, he could feel her grief pulsating through his body, every tear and every sob coursing through his veins. She was a woman a strength and resilence - she had to be if she could feel like this and still carry on day-to-day. But now that he was around, he wouldn't allow her to do that anymore. Georgia might have been used to doing it all on her own, but she had him now. Slowly, but surely, he would help her see that she had him, and he would gladly help her if only she would ask.
"You're so quiet over there." Julian looked up to see George standing across the way, arms folded across her chest. "For a moment there, I though you skipped out."
"Ah, no, I'm still here." She might have been dressed in a lace tank and light purple-colored pajama pants, but she might as well have been wearing a bra and panties, if the tightness of his pants was any indication. "I would never do that too you anyway."
"I know you wouldn't," she said softly. He watched as walked over and sat beside him. He hoped she wouldn't hear the pounding of his heart, or notice the beads of sweat forming on his forehead. "I wouldn't begrudge you if you did, though."
Even as he stole glances, he tried his best not to stare at her too much, for fear of his desire getting the better of him. Julian couldn't help himself - she was just so beautiful, and he wanted nothing more to wrap his around her and hold her close, inhale her scent, and kiss the pain away...
The feeling were just that intense.
Georgia's eyes were firmly on her hands in lap, kneading themselves over and over again as her feet drummed against the floor. She too stole glances at him, but every time their eyes met, she'd quickly turn away. He listened as she inhaled and exhaled over and over again - probably trying to calm herself down.
"I'm really sorry about running out on your like that," she said after some time. "I hadn't realized how much this would affect me. I didn't think this would be so nervewrecking, inviting you here for the night."
"I see." He offered her a sympathetic smile, even as his heart ached. "I could always take the cab home, if it would make you feel better."
"No, Julian, you don't have to do that," she insisted. "Don't misunderstand me - I invited you here because I want you here. I just didn't realize what a big deal it would be."
"What do you mean by that?" He didn't understand. "What do you mean by 'big deal'?"
Julian watched as Georgia took one last deep breath before reaching over for his hands. Her eyes were fearful and moist and she looked deeply into his. "I know I'm going to sound crazy for saying this but...but by bringing you here, it's like I've brought you into the center of my heart."
Julian felt every hair on his body stand on end. "And that's a bad thing?"
Georgia shook her head. "No...not a bad thing. At least I don't think it is. But..." Her voice trailed, but she picked up back up quickly. "But it does frighten me."
"Why would it scare you, Georgia?" He squeezed her hand, even as his heart sank. "I'd never hurt you, Georgia. Don't you believe that?"
"I know you won't." Somehow, he felt her heart sinking with his. "But I'm still scared."
------
There...she said the words. She admitted it.
It was damn frightening to admit such a thing, even if Julian was her mate. This was her inner sanctum - the one place where George could truly be herself. Every aspect of her life, her personality, her happiness, and her sorrows were in this place she called home. The only thing that wasn't here with the tufts of white fur from her monthly shift strewn across the floor - she'd long vacuumed up those. No one would ever fault her for being a she-wolf here - this was was her own personal den here in the city. For that reason, she was reluctant to share this place with anyone else. The only other person who was lucky enough to enter these walls was Dominic - the last person who would ever judge her and the one person who understood how hard it was to live the kind of life she lived.
But Julian - Julian may have felt strongly about her, but he didn't know her deepest secrets. He didn't know that she was a werewolf, that she had to shift once a month on the Waxing Gibbous Moon because she didn't shift on a regular basis. And while little hints of her wolfy nature came and went without fanfare or consequence, it still wasn't enough to make her feel completely safe.
She'd already lost so much - her parents, and a fake mate she loved nonetheless. And even if he was a special enough human to be destined for her, she didn't have enough faith in the bond to feel completely safe.
But she wanted to feel safe, oddly enough. She wanted to him to be here - she wanted him to see this. They were growing closer, weren't they? She said she would do more than try. And with him, she felt so content. Every time he looked at her, smiled at her, it felt amazing. When he spoke of his affection for her, she believed him - she knew he was being honest. In his arms, she felt her place - despite all her fear, her insecurities, and her anxieties, she knew she had a place his arms and that no one else could take her place.
That's what made this bond so frightening. By giving into the bond, you gave into vulnerability. You gave your mate the ultimate power to hurt you, believing in your heart of hearts that they never would.
"This place is an extension of me," she said softly. "It's the only place where I'm truly myself. And no one really sees that about me, save for Dominic. By bringing you here, it's like I'm inviting you to see me for who I really am. And that really scares me because most people wouldn't like seeing me for who I really am."
"But I want to see who you really are." George shivered as he tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "I want to know everything about you, Georgia. Don't you know that?"
"I do." She might have been a strong she-wolf, but right now, she was no better than a small child frightened of the monsters lurking under the bed. "I guess I just don't want to do anything that will make it so that I lose you."
"That's not going to happen." He sounded completely sure of himself. "You're stuck with me, Georgia. I'm not leaving you."
Softness and vulnerability filled her entire body. "I-I don't want you to leave. I just...I want to feel safe with you here...with you in my heart."
"I'm in your heart?" The happiness in his voice was crystal clear. "Really?"
Her wolf yipped over and over again, cheering her on. Even as her body began to tremble in fear, she knew there was no going back now. "Yes, you are. That's why this is so scary." She leaned over and whispered into his ear. "I've brought you here to my home, and my home is my heart."
Just when she thought he couldn't smile any brighter, he gave her his brightest smile yet. "I'll make sure you don't regret that, Georgia." He cupped her cheek in his hand. "Like I said - now that I'm here, I'm not leaving. Nothing will ever turn me away."
I really hope that's true, Julian, especially when it comes time to tell you. "I'm going to hold you to that."
"Please do." Her eyes fluttered close as the heady aroma of his arousal filled her nostrils. She could hear the racing of his heart, his quickened breathing, and she swore could feel the his blood rushing throughout his body. Enveloped in the heat between them, there was no mistaking his feelings. Just as she felt his pain before, now, she could feel his pleasure. It's all for me. "I'm a man of my word."
The arousal of the wolf began to push its way to the surface. George didn't fight it. Instead, she allow the affection of the human to marry with the arousal of the wolf. She didn't want to be afraid this time - she didn't want the fear to stop her. She just wanted to be with him now - both she and her wolf wanted to be. She knew he loved her - she could see it swirling inside those open eyes. And now, she could feel her own love blooming within her heart, melting away the glacial ways that protected her for years.
I don't want to be afraid of you. You're my mate - you were destined for me. You said it yourself - you chose me. So I shouldn't be afraid of you...
So, I won't be. Not anymore. And then her lips were against his.
------
It was amazing how the touch of her lips could make Julian go from relative calmness to impatient urgency within a matter of seconds.
He always wanted Georgia - he always did. But when she was this close to him, when she kissed him so sweetly like this, he wanted her even more. He never wanted to be without her. He wanted to be with her in every imaginable way, shape and form. She's given him her heart - there was no way he'd ever give in back. Enveloped in her warm, aroused by her scent, he'd never needed Georgia more than he did right now.
His - she would have to be his forevermore - he simply couldn't imagine his life without her.
Julian wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her so closely so that she was pressed tightly against him. She didn't resist him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She kissed him with the same amount of careful tenderness he provided to her.
But tenderness wouldn't be enough - he needed more. Now that she touched him, now that he was drunk with her scent, spellbound by her presence, simply having her nearby wouldn't do. He needed her like the air he breathed, maybe even more so. The air was heady with a smell he couldn't full describe yet it awakened all his basic, primal instincts.
Want, need, desire - Georgia.
He wanted experience every part of her, commit it all to memory. He wanted to please her in the most intimate of ways, to quell his lust, to show his love. His head dipped into the curve of her neck, inhaling her sweet, lovely scent. He felt her shudder as he placed a kiss on the nape, which only excited him more. She wanted this - she wanted it as much as he did. And now that he knew that, there was no stopping him.
Her - he needed her.
He belonged to her - and she sure as hell belonged to him.
I need more - so much more. Julian had never felt like this before. His body was alive with savage imagery, possessed by the call of the wild. He needed her closer - he needed to feel her skin against his. He couldn't wrap his mind around it, but that didn't matter. He hungered for this woman - he was starved for her. When she reached for his shirt, his fingers moved in time with hers, the buttons unfastened and the shirt tossed away in fluid time. He paid no mind to the gasp that ripped from her throat as he pushed her back onto the couch, hovering a top her.
"J-Julian," she cried out in surprise.
"Shh..." His voice was low and raspy, like a growl. His eyes were dark with lust, and the surprise in her eyes gave way, revealing her own. "Just enjoy yourself..."
Have her...must have her.
Georgia sighed quietly as he eased the lace straps of her tank to down her shoulders, kissing the curve of her neck. He was complete complete intoxicated, gripped with a powerful animalistic agitation. This spot - this spot on her neck was special. It awakened the beast within, the basic spirit with basic desires born in everyone but only a few listen to. He couldn't help but listen to - it possessed him after lying in wait, hidden for so long, and it wouldn't return to the deep of his soul unless it had all of her. But this spot, this spot that carried a well of her scent, would be its first conquest. There she would be reminded of her bond to him - physically and mentally.
Have her.
He couldn't wait any longer. He couldn't control himself. He needed that taste - he needed her taste, her scent, her everything. With one sharp inhale, he sunk his teeth into her nape of her neck, biting her as sensually as beast desired, but as physically as she would allow.
Mine. His eyes flashed gold for a brief moment in time before the euphoria swallowed him whole.
------
The pain hit her hard and fast - George barely had the chance the scream. Her mind raced, trying to make sense of what was happening, and when she figured it out, she couldn't believe it.
He bite her - seriously? This human was biting her neck?
But then another feeling washed over her - a feeling much more enjoyable than the first. Her wolf cried out in elation as the pleasurable waves crashed into her over and over again. Her senses were in overload. Everything radiated wondrous love, pure love, married with undying passion and sensual devotion. She felt like she could die this very moment, as all she knew was happiness. It surrounded her, exuding for every part of her, cocooning her into an eternal bond that may frazzle and fray, but never break.
Julian...my love...Her eyes were all-glow, bright with desire, warm with eternal love.
George didn't want it to go away - she wanted to hold this feeling inside her for a long as she could. She'd never know such euphoria - she had never known such love. But as quickly as it came, it disappeared, fading into the night air. She was back to earth, in the darkness of her living room, body shivering from the sensory overload.
"Georgia." Julian kissed her neck once more before looking up at her, his eyes filled with as much confusion as hers held. "Georgia, I'm sorry, I..."
"You...bit me," she whispered breathlessly, still in a passionate daze. "You actually bit me."