Keir stood in the parking lot frozen in the same spot for almost an hour.
No one he loved stayed long, he learned that today. His Dad abandoned him and now Selene.
He felt like a fool to believe that he could change. He had it all planned, he would stop this killing, be a good man and love Selene unconditionally. They would leave Downtown, travel and find a new home, away from this chaos.
Now he can't. Especially when she feels he is a burden to her. It hurt the most, being a burden to someone you love. Someone who is not willing to fight the demons along with you. He thought she was the one, but in the end, she was scared.
He terrified her, and rightly so. Who would want to be with a infamous serial killer.
Every time he killed someone before her, he thought she understood him better, why he killed. He was wrong, he was scaring her away.
It was time that he accepted the universe. A killer could never change and a girl would never love a killer.
Telling himself that, only pained more in his chest. He placed a palm on his left chest and rubbed it where it pained. It was like an unseen wound, deep but invisible.
His eyes were slowly filling with tears as he realised that she won't be back. He looked up into the night sky and blinked, the moon blurred into the stars beside it.
The moon, he thought.
Keir was the darkness that night clouded over and Selene was it's moon that brought back light.
He never asked for sunshine, but if God was there, he would definitely ask for Selene in his life.
Funny thing is love is. He never wanted his Dad more than he now wanted Selene. That thought angered him. She hurt him, but yet he still wanted to be with her.
When did he become so dependent on her? He questioned himself.
Sighing to himself and wiping the unshed tears dry from his eyes, he walked into the club again.
He could really use something to blur his thoughts too.
He plopped on the bar stool and knocked at the bar.
"A bottle of whiskey." He ordered the bartender.
"Sorry sir, but we are sold out."
Keir gritted and grabbed his collar, looking straight into his eyes.
"I'll give you two options. You get me a bottle from the stash somewhere or I can drink your blood instead." He seethed, gripping his collar tighter.
The bartender choked and nodded, "I-I can arrange..to...that, sir."
Keir released his grip and the man scurried off.
Soon he came back with a bottle and timidly placed it on the counter. Keir grabbed a glass and poured himself a large peg to drown in it.
He gulped it down his throat in one sip and poured another again. He didn't want to remember her even in the gap between the drinks.
"Heartbreak's not a good look on you, Mr. Killer."
Keir turned to the voice and found a man grinning at him at his side. Keir ignored the man and focused back on his drink.
"Oh! C'mon. Shouldn't ya be off killing someone?"
Keir growled, "Unless you have a death wish, it's better you leave me alone."
He might want to change, but the urges are still there, especially with his emotions all over.
"Ooo.." The man raised his hands in surrender. "You don't wanna kill me. No, you want to kill someone else." He leaned closer to Keir, "Someone who lures men to her and betrays them."
Keir slammed the glass on the counter and took out his knife in a flash. He placed it on his neck, his hand itching to slice it off.
All the eyes turned to the duo, who were creating a drama amongst them.
The man laughed nervously and turned to the others, "It's alright. It's how me and my friend here discuss things." He dismissed them and they focused back on their work.
"I have no fucking idea what you are talking about but you are bothering me." Keir whispered slowly, "So let me assist you to Hell." He seethed, digging his knife into his neck.
The man chuckled nervously. Maybe it was the wrong move to irk him, he should have used the other way.
"Let's not fight, brother. I'm sure you shiny little thing can be put to a good use than to tear apart my little neck."
The man gripped his hand, holding the knife and snaked it out of his neck.
"You have five seconds. Get. Out. Of. My. Sight." He gritted.
The man gulped, "I-" He started, Keir took out his knife again.
"There's something I have to tell you." The man spoke swiftly.
Keir put his knife down, a little amused at his persistence and courage.
"And I believe you might wanna listen." He rubbed his neck when Keir slightly imprinted with his knife.
"It's about Selene."
Now he had Keir's undeniable attention.
***
Selene came out of her cocoon of blankets, when she heard a knock on her front door.
Her hair was dishevelled from running hands through them a lot. Her eyes red and puffy from crying a lot.
She swung the door open to see, similar red eyes like hers. Keir was standing at the threshold, his pitch black eyes staring at her with unknown expression.
He was sad? Angry? Drunk? She didn't know.
"Keir? What are you doing here?"
He walked past her, not waiting for her to invite him in. Selene closed the door and wiped her eyes hoping to hide the evidence of crying.
"Why is it a wrong time?" he asked, his dark eyes scanning her house like a hawk.
"No, I just didn't expect to see you now."
Especially after breaking his heart just to make him stay away from her. She wanted to say that.
Keir ignored her and took a seat at the coffee table on her balcony.
"We need to have a little chat." He tapped the chair beside him, gesturing to her to take a seat.
Selene timidly walked to the chair and screeched it a little away from him. She was scared of him tonight, she didn't know why.
His eyes were scanning her every move. They never left her but instead pinned her down. The weight of his gaze was unsettling her.
"What is it?"
"You remember the first time we met?" Keir asked. It was a random question.
"Yeah, the shed?" Selene asked without thinking.
Keir slammed the table with his palm, "No! The club."
Selene jumped in her place at his sudden mood change, "We didn't meet Keir, we just saw each other."
Selene talked as if she was dealing with a baby on the verge of screaming.
"Saw each other? Right." He nodded, "You were so bold. You stared right into my eyes while no one even batted an lash at me." He talked in a trance, like he was revisiting that night.
Selene gulped and gave a half smile, "You don't make any sense."
"Neither does it. How could you look into the eyes of a man who kills people. Why weren't you scared?"
Selene was now convinced that Keir was completely drunk. She regretted opening her door and letting him in.
"cuz I didn't know you were a killer?" She suggested.
"Then what about the time you pointed a knife at me? Or you made a deal with the killer?"
She exhaled sharply, agitated by this conversation. "Where are you headed with this?"
"You see Selene, you amused me so much that I ignored some things about you. But I'm a killer after all, an organised one at that. I can't help but feel like some things about you never made sense to me."
Selene huffed, "Like what?"
"Like when you put up with my shit just to keep Haden alive?" Keir whispered his words hanging heavy in the air.
Blood left from her face. Was she imagining this conversation happening or is she really awake, she questioned herself.
She opened her mouth but Keir beat her to it.
"You hated him, I could see in your eyes but you wanted him alive. It's like you were saving him for a bigger sacrifice."
He got up from the chair slowly walking towards her. He looked like a lion on hunt for his prey and she hated to bring back those traits in him.
"You listened to my past, shared my grief, met my family, made me realize that it's okay not to be perfect," He shook his head, "Why would you? It doesn't make any sense."
Selene got up as well and took a few steps back, away from him.
"Your phone had a concrete security system when I tried to hack into it in the shed." He said, suddenly shifting the topic.
He leaned over her, his hot alcohol breath fanning her face, "Too much for a mere Downtown criminal. Don't you think?"
That was it. Realisation hit like a speeding car to Selene. Keir knew about her. He learned about NIA and their plans for him. He didn't come here for a chat like he said, he came here for his revenge.
Selene frantically walked back making sure to place a good distance between him.
"Scared, Selene?" He cocked his head, "Oh! Wait. Or is it Agent Luna?"
Selene gasped in shock, she walked even away from him, hitting the wall.
Keir placed his hands on either side, trapping her.
"Trying to run? Good." He leaned near her ear, "Cuz it won't be pretty when I get my hands on you."
Selene shuddered at the tone he used. Mustering up some courage, she looked into his eyes that were covered by his dishevelled front hair.
"I'm not running away. I can explain. But first you need to rest. We can talk when you are sober." She tried to calm him down.
Keir shook his head, "I trusted you, tried to change for you, loved you and this is what I get? Heartbreak and betrayal?" Keir yelled, gripping her arm.
"You knew my past and yet you show up working with the same system that led me into this spiralling shithole?" His eyes glistening with tears in them. His nose tip and ears red from the uncontrollable emotions.
All this time he kept telling himself that Selene is different. But fate had been playing games with him, it made Selene one of them. Yet he had no strength to hate her.
He scoffed to himself at the irony of life.
Knowing that she is responsible for the tears in his eyes hurt more than his death grip. Selene's eyes could no longer hold the barricades anymore. Tears pour out like waterfall.
"I'm sorry, Keir. I never planned for this to happen-" she was cut off.
"So much for redemption, huh?" he said, loosening his grip. She shook her head trying to explain what actually happened.
"I was assigned to Haden three years back. I was meant to lure him in while working there and slowly gather evidence against him just enough to get him behind the bars.
I never planned to meet you. Then one day NIA assigned me you. They wanted me to help them catch you," She cast her eyes down.
I didn't plan on getting close to you but I did. I didn't wish to change you but you did. I didn't plan to hurt you but I did."
She whispered those last words, breaking into low sobs.
"You need to understand Keir that fate had been cruel to me too."
Keir shook his head, still not convinced, "So you had to do it because NIA had ordered?"
Selene nodded, wiping the tears.
"Then our kiss was an act too, I suppose?"
Selene looked at him with shocked eyes and shook her head.
"No!" She said quickly.
Keir gasped, mockingly.
"Betraying NIA? my god! Which side are you on, Agent Luna?"
His sarcasm that Selene once loved was now tearing her heart into pieces.
"As I can see you are not helpful for NIA nor credible to me. Oh! Can I add Haden to your betrayal list too?"
Selene cast her head down, her body shaking with uncontrollable sobs.
"So what is it gonna be Selene? My head or my heart?" Keir asked with a passive face.
Selene was silent. Seconds passed. Minutes passed. Keir waited for her to speak.
"Your head and my heart." She whispered at last.
Keir took a step back, surprised by her answer. But he decided he won't fall for her words again. He can't make the same mistake twice the same night.
He gave humourless laugh, "Fuck you!" and walked his way to the door.
Selene ran after him, "Keir! Let me just explain why I had to do it-"
She was cut off when Keir swiftly turned around and grabbed the back of her neck in death grip.
"I HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR LIES!" Keir shouted in an earth shaking voice.
Selene gasped at his tone and the way his grip tightened around her head.
"Ah! -" She winced as a bolting pain shot in her head.
Her head was still hurting from when she hit the wall and crying all night drained all her energy, the pressure on neck was making it worse.
"Does it hurt?" Keir asked looking into her eyes. His eyes were red and glistening, on the verge of tears.
Selene nodded.
"Imagine how it pains here." He pointed his finger to his heart, releasing his grip on her.
Tears fell from his eyes. They were tears of betrayal and anger more than sadness. She could feel the heat from them.
"Why won't you listen to me?" She whispered.
"NO! You listen to me Selene Sherman. From now on, you stay the fuck away from me." He pointed his finger at her.
"Or God forbid, you'll be the fourth woman this serial killer would kill." He spat and turned back.
Slamming the door shut, he walked away, leaving a crumbled Selene on the floor.
*****