December
"How- How can you be here?"
"Did you miss me?" A large grin crossed onto Malcom's face as he stared across the ruined bridge, his cold blue eyes never once leaving where you rigidly stood, a dark mischievous look swirling around in them. His right hand crept up to slid into his pocket, pushing back the black trench coat that he was wearing and he smirked, the all to familiar and grotesque gesture making a sickening feeling grow inside your stomach.
"I should have known." These hushed words circulated around the open area, the stillness allowing everyone to hear what you had said. "All those clues that obviously pointed towards you. And yet I was too blind to realize." Stupidity was the only thing you felt. The overwhelming sense of foolishness, distress and self deprecation on being so ignorant when the clues were clearly there; clearly showed that Malcom was the real culprit behind the destruction that had followed you these countless years. "How could I not have realized it?"
"My question exactly; how could you not have realized that it was me? I even left you all those clues and yet you blindly ignored each and every one of them. Now how exactly did you fail to do that my apprentice?"
He stepped forward which was nothing but a small action but still forbidding enough to make you tense, body ready to step back if needed to. Ciel and Sebastian both noticed this, Sebastian's red eyes sliding to look at you from his peripherals, yet neither of them commented on this realizing that it was best not too.
"So then it was really you. Everything that happened around me was because of you. Wasn't it!"
"Why are you asking me this when you already know the answer to that question?" Malcom bemusedly asked, that same sly smirk remaining on his face as he watched each movement that you made.
"The former Earl Trancy, breaking into the Phantomhive Manor, kidnapping the other James and killing the reapers, even the fucking magic book was just you messing around with everyone and me!"
"If you want to list all that I have done then yes, I admit to having done all of them."
A cold sense of realization struck you, a crushing state of horror that made your body stiffen and your mind to reel. A sickening sensation grew from within, one that made bile rise to the back of your throat and your body to quiver.
"Don't tell me... D-Did you kill my parents?"
There was a still silence that hung over the bridge the moment you had said this, a foreboding feeling that seemed to creep up from not only yourself, but from Ciel as well. Sebastian didn't seem worried, but there was a wary expression on his face as he watched Malcom knowing himself that he needed to be careful in his presence.
Malcom was quiet for a moment, the grin that had disappeared from his face moments ago beginning to creep back onto his face, the whites of his teeth slightly being displayed behind his lips, the expression itself being nothing but a dreadful sight to see. A low deep chuckle began from the tall man, one that increased to full amused laughter as Malcom pulled his hand out from his pocket.
"Do you really have to ask me a question of that sort? Even you should have realized the truth to the death of your parents if you had the slightest idea that I was involve, but since you also want a direct answer for that, then yes. I was the one who killed your parents."
And with that a heavy revolting weight dropped to the pit of your stomach. The bile that had risen to the back of your throat threatened to come out and your eyes begun to sting, a burning sting and tears welled up in your eyes. The world surrounding had become silent; a haze had fallen over it preventing you from focusing on what was happening. You wanted to break down, to collapse to the ground right there, but your legs wouldn't move, wouldn't listen no matter the responses that your brain would send to it.
"(Y/N)?"
The soft, questioning hush of Ciel's voice slowly brought you from the daze that you were in. Blinking, the view before you clear, focusing on the tall figure of Malcom who remained standing before the three of you in an amused manner while he simply watched the breakdown you were going through. Having gotten a small grasp, your eyes slid over to the left where Ciel stood, worriedness heavy in his eyes and it was then you realized that you were shaking. Shuddering more like it. As if you had been cast into the freezing cold with nothing but short sleeve clothes and you were sure that both Ciel and Sebastian could see the panic in your eyes.
Pulling your gaze from Ciel and giving Sebastian a slight look, your eyes turned back to Malcom who simply watch. Bemusedly watch how his presence affected you in a sickened manner. Thousands of thoughts and questions raced through your mind at the moment, piecing everything together and filling in the gaps, but there was one question that you couldn't answer.
"But why?"
The hushed question was directed towards Malcom who chuckled once again and he took a stepped forward, the movement making you tremble ever the slightest and Sebastian quickly stepped in front of both Ciel and you, body tensed as if waiting for a fight to begin.
"Now my dear apprentice. I would say that's the best question you have asked this entire day."
His lowly chuckle, that familiar chuckle of his made you clench your hands tightly at your sides, hands curled into fist so tight that your nails painfully dug into your skin. The dread that clung to your heart intermingled with the slight hints of irritation at this. Both fear and detestation swirled their way around inside of you as you set your gaze on Malcom.
He himself never once pulled his gaze away from your own, ignoring both Ciel and Sebastian as if the two of them weren't there in the first place. It was clear that his only focus was you and there was no surprise to this. The history between the two of you was deep, one that had became darker and violent the more you learned about it yourself.
Fire continued to wage on in the background. London was still a sea of flames, the fiery orange glow could bee seen even from the distance the four of you were, but no one was thinking about the burning city or any of the people that still remained there. All focus was on the twisted magic-user that stood before everyone.
"Why you say? Why would I kill those precious, yet foolish parents of yours?" He began to walk in a short back and forth line stating these questions in a mocking tone, paying no attention to Ciel and Sebastian and for the first time you. "Now that you know who actually killed your parents I'm sure you're desperate for my answer. However." He cane to an abrupt stop, his black shoes coming together with a loud clank, the sound ranging across the unfinished bridge and he turned back to face your group. His eyes were dark and calculative while he smirked, the expression highlighting the coldness in his piercing blue eyes. "In afraid that you'll have to wait a little longer on getting your answer. I don't believe the time is exactly right."
"Tell me why you killed them!"
The loud and demanding shout was thrown at Malcom who seemed to be nothing but amused at the sudden outburst. Although fear ran rampant inside of you, rage had crept its way from the dark shadows, unfurling and growing with each moment Malcom spoke. You had let this bastard terrorize you for entire life even after the two of you had parted ways and it was sickening. Why had you allows for this to happen? Why did you allow him to get underneath your skin and frighten you so?
He shook his head, a mocking sad look crossing his face as he closed his eyes and raised his shoulder in a fallen shrug. "Getting agitated won't do you any good. I would have thought that by now you knew how to control your temper. You're about as bad as that wretched fallen angel."
"Don't compare me to Ash! I have never sunken to the likes of him."
"Ah, but it appears you're becoming more like the earl Phantomhive over there. Obsessed with finding out who killed your parents, never moving on with your life and devoting it entirely on revenge. Maybe you'll even go as far as hiring a vulgar demon to do your dirty work."
"Enough! Ciel has nothing to do with any of this! Leave everyone out of this! They don't need to get involved."
Malcom only chuckled at this, giving another shake of his head. "You have no right to address me in that way nor any authority to decide who I decided to get involved with."
"You're not answering my question. Why did you kill my parents? And why were their memories in a cinematic record?"
"And it seems you're not listening. You were never one to listen and follow my orders well; always irritated me whenever you did that." The scowl that was on his face deepened. It was a twisted scowl, one that revealed his irritation, wrath and impatience, one that you remembered him always having whenever things never worked out. "I told you before; I shall tell you when the time is right."
"Malcom!" You shouted, taking an angered step forward albeit fearfully and from your peripherals you noted that Sebastian and Ciel was watching you and Malcom carefully.
Malcom had easily seen the fear that was in your eyes and he sickeningly smiled at this, finding amusement in everything. "It seems that you still fear me my dear apprentice. Does what happened to you in the past still continue to haunt you? How I trained you to be the best, not to mention having witnessed your parents death before your eyes."
"That's enough!"
The new demanding voice made everyone turn to Ciel who stepped forward, the earl having been the one to shout. Annoyance and irritation was written in his face, emotions that were directed towards Malcom who's smirk fell from his face as he turned to regard the boy closely. Ciel glanced towards you from the corner of his eyes, carefully watching you in a worried manner before his turned back to face Malcom. "I've had enough of your foolish disgusting talk. I don't know why you're explicitly doing this, but you've gone far enough. I won't have any of this nonsense anymore. Sebastian-"
"Have you found who killed your parents yet?"
Ciel froze, his eyes widening as he watched as the smirk on Malcom's face reappeared. "How do you know about that?"
"What if I was to say that I know who killed your parents?"
Malcom left that question hang in the air and it was clear that Ciel was torn on what to say. Malcom's words had clearly left an impression on the boy who wavered in place, mind reeling with what had been said, but only a moment had passed before the earl glanced back at the magic-user, a hardened gaze in his eyes. "That means nothing to me. I can find out who killed my parents by my own means."
"Determined I see... Or maybe just foolish," Malcom said with a smile and a shrug. "That goes for everyone who live in the Phantomhive Manor."
"Sebastian I order you to kill him! Not just for me, but for (Y/N) as well."
"Yes my Lord," Sebastian responded with a bow, his cold, angered red eyes focused on Malcom. "I was planning on doing this regardless if you did not ordered me to." With a brief look at you he focused back on Malcom, leaping towards the magic-user with his silver knives in hand, Malcom simply watching with that eerie smile of his. The moment Sebastian was on him Malcom vanished.
"Where did he go?" Ciel shouted just as Sebastian landed where the magic-user had been moments ago.
"You'll have to do more than that."
Swiftly, you turned around to find Malcom behind Ciel and you, that coy smirk of his remaining on his face from where he stood.
"Conjure up the weapon I see in mind and send it to the enemies side," you chanted, daggers flying through the air in Malcom's direction, however, he only gave a sweep of his hand, a heavy gust of wind blowing in and sending the daggers flying off to the side. In disbelief you could only watch as the daggers scattered to the ground and you turned back only to flinch to find him directly in front. His smirk was full in your face as he leaned forward, the close proximity of the towering man causing trepidation to freeze you in place.
"If you wish to find the answer that you're asking for go back to where it all started."
With a coy smile that was all that he said before he vanished into the night.
All you could do was stare where he had once stood. Your heart was beating loudly in your chest seeming as if it would burst any second from now and a heavy breath, one that you didn't know you had been holding, blew out from your mouth. Your legs were shaking and you had to fight really hard not to collapse on the spot right there. Malcom certainly still affected your mindset even when it had been years since you had actually face him.
A hand grasped your shoulder and you yelped. Quickly you turned around only to find that it was Ciel who was looking at you.
He was quiet for a moment, eyes worriedly peering into your own. "Are you okay?"
It was a moment before you could answer his question, but you managed to respond. "No," you said, just before everything went dark, your body collapsing into the dark abyss of fear, exhaustion, and grief.
---------------------------
Immediately, your body lurched up, a cold sweat bathing your body as dread and unease clouded your thoughts. The events from earlier still hung fresh in your memory, the atrocious reunion between Malcom and you once again making a sickening feeling rise up from inside and as much as you desperately wished that it was nothing more than a nightmare, you knew that it was far from that.
Your body stiffen. Where was Malcom now? He had disappeared after he had said those last words.
"If you wish to find the answer that you're asking for go back to where it all started."
His words would seem strange to anyone, but to you, there was an underlying feeling that you knew exactly what he was mentioning. And this was something that you desperately wished to avoid. No, you wished that all of this had never happened. That Malcom had never showed up in your life once again; that he had remained absent and allowed you to live your life, although disordered, at the Phantomhive Manor.
Worry soon welled up from inside once thinking about the others and you straightened, peering around the area for the first time since you had awoken. Anxiousness mingled with the pain that throbbed inside; no, your whole body was splitting in pain and it felt like it was mere moments away from collapsing once again. A splintering headache had taken hold of your mind ever since you had awoken and no matter how much you rubbed your temples, the ache remained.
For once, you pushed up from the couch, having been laying on the firm mattress when you had been unconscious and quickly, you looked around, a sharp pulse of pain flashing through your mind at the sudden movement. There was no one in sight, but you realized that you were in a small separate room that was off from one of the living rooms in the Manor. Voices could be heard from the other side of the room and although they were muffled, you recognized the voices of Ciel and a few of the others.
Blearily you stood, stumbling in place and you had to grab onto the arm of the couch to not topple over. Pain bolted through your body, one so agonizing that the edge of your vision darkened and truthfully, the comforting appeal of it made you want nothing more than to succumb to that darkness. However, you resisted the urge, pausing for a moment to ward away the abyss that threatened to pull you under and having gotten a grasp on yourself, you stumbled toward the voices.
They got closer as you approached and from the few bits that you picked up it was clear that they were discussing what had happened. Your name along with Malcom's was heard and internally, you winced upon hearing his name in the same sentence as yours. Coming around the corner of the doorway, you could easily see into the living room and your eyes fell onto the figures that were there.
The servants were absent, no less resting like you had. With the fight that had happened between Pluto, it was only obvious that they would be tired. A small thought arose upon thinking about the demon hound and you wondered where he was. From what you had remembered you had saved the demon hound or you were certain that you had.
You must have made some sort of sound that made Ciel and Sebastian look over to where you lingered in the doorway.
"(Y/N)."
Ciel's voice made you look over to where he sat in one of the seats that was in the room, Sebastian standing at his side as if he would dare not to sit. There was a contemplative expression on both of their faces, Ciel's leaning more towards a troubled manner clearly uncertain with the situation at hand. That troubled expression only seemed to grow more worried once his gaze had landed on you and you knew without having to look in the mirror that you looked awful.
"Perhaps you should go rest. You look exhausted."
"I won't be able to rest not with what's happened," you replied, leaning against the railing in hopes not to topple over and slowly, you entered the room, heading over to Ciel and Sebastian while stumbling as you walked. Sebastian and Ciel were clearly alarmed at this, the two shifted forward to help, however, you simply raised a hand and gave a slight shake of your head.
The two settled back, but it was clear that they were still alarmed because of your injured state and they closely watched as you stumbled over to the couch, watching in case they needed to intervene if you fell. However, you managed to make your way over to the couch and with a wince of pain, settled down to sit alongside Ciel.
The young earl turned to face you as you tucked yourself into the couch, letting out a sigh of relief now that you didn't have to move anymore for the time being.
"Are you doing okay?"
That was the first thing that Ciel had asked once you had settled and you looked to where he was sitting on your right. With a small, pained smile in reassurance you answered. "I'm just feeling a bit sore. I should be fine after a while."
It was clear that he didn't believe your words for once second, however, he said nothing to this, the same going for Sebastian who simply watched from where he stood. Even without having to look at them it was clear that there full attention was fully focused on you. You didn't want to make them worry, but with how haggard you felt, there wouldn't be much that you could do to convince them that you were fine.
"What's happened while I was unconscious?"
Sebastian and Ciel was quiet, seeming to be gathering their thoughts before they answered their question and you could only look between them expectantly. You could only hope that Malcom hadn't done anything since he had disappeared and there was an underlying feeling of unease upon thinking about that man.
"You've been asleep for a day." Ciel finally began to talk and your stomach sunk upon hearing how long you had been asleep for. "After you had collapsed yesterday, it began to ran and the fires that one plagued London were extinguished. The queen has begun the reconstruction process and has provided aide to everyone that was affected by the fires. But many was killed in the flames."
Silence fell over the room once he had said this. All you could remember was the shrill panic screams of people from last night and the charred blackened bodies that had littered the streets of London. Then you had thought nothing, simply focused on saving Pluto, but now that you had a moment to reflect, you couldn't help the miserable feeling that arose upon thinking about all the people that had died as a result of Ash's actions.
Speaking of Ash, the fallen angel had been cruelly murdered by his own partner. Although the angel himself was vile, to be mercilessly betrayed and killed by your trusted partner was something you didn't want anyone to experience. You thought that things would correct themselves once Ash was dead, but now that Malcom was in the picture, there was no telling what would happen.
"And Malcom?"
Your question was left to hang in the air. Sebastian and Ciel gave each other a look and you knew that the answer wouldn't be one you would like.
"After he disappeared we were completely unable to find him. I even had Sebastian go search the city for him yet even he was unable to find the magic-user." Ciel frowned, the displeasure and irritation he was feeling written across his face and you could understand why.
"That sounds like him," you muttered underneath your breath, hands clenching at your side.
"(Y/N)." There was a serious tone behind his voice that made you turn to him, your lips pressed into a thin line as you waited for what he was about to say. "From what I gathered, that man was the same magic-user who had been leaving those clues. What I hadn't expected was that you knew who he was. So tell me (Y/N), how exactly did you know that man?"
Guiltily you could only wring your hands on top of your lap, your eyes falling away from the earl and onto your lap. You had never told Ciel or the others about Malcom, but you had wanted to leave that time of your life behind you. And it was not like you knew that he would reappear.
Shifting in the seat, you thought over how you would explain to the both of them on your connection to Malcom. It was clear to anyone that you were uncomfortable, but you had to let them know everything especially now that they had been pulled into this situation.
"Malcom was a close family friend; he and my parents had gone to college together so he would often come visit, so much so that even I considered him to be family," you began, resting into the soft comforts of the cushions and your gaze remained on your hands that rested in your lap. "But he had contrasting views with my parents regarding the hate that was directed towards magic-users. While they wanted to change the ways in a peaceful matter, he resided for more... Forceful ways."
Ciel and Sebastian remained quiet, listening to you as you explained the history you had with Malcom. It wasn't a pretty one; even you knew that, but the past was the past and there was no way to alter it.
"After my parents died he was the one who took me in, not exactly like a daughter, but he was the only other person that I could rely on," you continued, falling back into old memories that you had buried in the back of your mind throughout the years. "He soon began to train me not too long ago. At first things were fine. He simply taught me how to use my magic, how to control it, but as time passed, he became more ruthless in his teaching. No longer was he patient; he got frustrated easily and took out his anger on me. It got so bad that I had enough and eventually I managed to break away from him."
You fell silent once finished. Heavy emotions threatened to consume you and it took every strength you had to push them back down. Never had you wanted to relive those memories, but with Malcom back once again, you would have to face your fears once again.
"It's no wonder that your dreams had been plagued by nightmares." That was the first the Sebastian had spoken since you had woken. "To think that this has been haunting you for so long; it must have been dreadful. I wish you had told of this to us earlier."
With a small shaky sigh, you only gave a small nod of your head silently agreeing with what he had said. The nightmares that you had gotten about Malcom had always frightened and exhausted you, however, unlike the other nightmares that you had gotten before, those were ones that you had kept to yourself.
"Sorry. It probably would have been best to have told you about Malcom, but he was someone from the past that I didn't want to bring up. Not when I had put him behind me once and for all... Or so I thought," you said finally bringing your gaze up from your lap to look at both Ciel and Sebastian.
Ciel was quiet for a moment clearly processing all that you had told him, but his blue eye promptly looked over upon noticing that you were looking at him. "It's alright, you don't have to apologize. Although it would have been best if you told us earlier, I can understand that it was difficult for you so I won't hold it to you. What matters is dealing with the magic-user."
"Does he have any kinds of weakness that you might know?" Sebastian asked, his question directed towards you and you peeled your gaze away from Ciel and onto the demon butler.
"None that I know of. He doesn't have any family and I didn't know of any other friends or acquaintances with the exception of my parents," you answered thinking back to when you had meet with the older man when you were younger. "Actually, now that I think about it, I don't think I knew much about him. He was pretty secretive."
A low humming noise came from Ciel and as you turned to look back at him, you noticed that he was frowning, a contemplative look on the earl's face and the same could be said about Sebastian. "Sadly, that won't help us. And I'm sure that you wouldn't know anything else since it's been years since you've personally met him."
"So he truly has disappeared," Sebastian remarked, putting a gloved hand to his chin in deep thought. "And there's no clue on where he could have potentially have went."
"I have a vague idea as to where he might have gone."
Ciel and Sebastian inquisitively looked over at you, straightening up upon hearing that you had an idea as to where Malcom had gone. "Where do you think?"
"The last thing that he told me was that if I wanted to learn the reason why he killed my parents I have to go back to where it all started."
"Where it all started?"
"I think it means that I have to go back home. Back to when I first decided to come here."
Ciel immediately shot up in his seat, shock and surprise written on his face upon hearing what you had said. Sebastian's own eyes had widened at your words, the demon butler shockingly looking down at you from where he stood.
"You can't really be thinking about going back there? Not with him possibly waiting there for you and especially with how you told us it was like when you were living there."
You remained quiet and pulled your gaze from the both of them to look back down at your lap.
"(Y/N)! Don't tell me you actually considering it?" Ciel alarmingly demanded, reaching forward to grasp onto your hand.
"There's no other option."
Ciel sunk back into the couch, exasperated with what you had said, but there was no going back now that you had said it out loud. You had to learn why Malcom had killed your parents and prevent him from doing any harm to anyone else.
"Why don't you get some rest?" Ciel suggested making you turn to him once more. He could easily see how exhausted you were and truthfully, you wouldn't be surprised if there were dark marks underneath your eyes. "When you wake up we can discuss this more."
Seeing that there was no room for objection, you simply nodded your head and stood, staggering for a moment before you got your balance once again.
"I can help you to your room," Sebastian offered, stepping forward, his hand partially out as if ready to support your weight, however, you waved him off with your hand.
"Don't worry, I'll be okay," you told him, your reply also being directed at Ciel who seemed ready to help you as well.
With a small reassuring smile to them, you turned from the butler and the earl, leaving from the living room and heading towards your room. Unbeknownst to them, a resolute decision had already been made in your mind and melancholy, you looked back to where they stood in the room.
'Sorry everyone, but I have to do this to make sure that none of you get hurt.'
Turning back, you determinedly headed down the hallway, although staggering with each step you took, but you continued heading towards your room. There was a stillness in the hallways as you walked. The familiar merry chatter of the servants was long gone as was the playful barking of Pluto that you had grown so accustomed to hearing ever since he had come to the Phantomhive Manor. You wondered when you would hear such sounds again, if you would ever hear such sounds again.
A heavy sinking feeling had sunk to the lower pits of your stomach the closer you got to your room. Who knows what would happen. What would become of the home and family you had once you left? It wasn't long before you stood in front of the door that led into your room. With a heavy sigh, you could only stand in front of the door in the midst of collecting your thoughts, but soon enough you entered, closing the door behind and heading over to the drawer.
Two books were nestled in the drawers of the desk, one being your parents cinematic records, the other being the magic book that Malcom had left you. The magic book was what you had grabbed and with a small frown, you pushed the drawer closed before sitting on the comforts of the bed.
Even with the regret that was beginning to rise, you opened the book to the section pertaining to rare spells, those that only magic-users with high levels could use. After a quick skim through the pages; and making sure to memorize some of the spells knowing that they would be useful for later, you finally came upon the spell that had started everything.
The world I want to be, make me stand up there! Time I command and Place I command! Change me there now! This is my will, so mote it be.
The one that had led you from your old world and to the Phantomhive Manor. And just beneath it was the counter spell.
Say, day to night I send myself with flight back to the place I came from.
This would be the spell that would led you back home. Home. That was a word you rarely said when applying it to your old home. With living at the Phantomhive Manor for two years, you had come to regard it as your home. Reciting these words would bring you back. Back to where it all began which was exactly what Malcom wanted.
But before you could recite the chant, a loud knock echoed from the door. Flustered, you pushed the book to the side just as the door opened, Ciel entering the room with a heavy expression on his face.
"I had a feeling that you would do this."
"Ciel!"
Immediately you stood, bewilderingly watching as the earl headed over to where you stood by the bed. His eyes slid over to the magic book that rested on the bed and slowly, you shifted it over to hide it behind your back.
"There's no need to hide it. I already knew that you would attempt to go back in order to confront the magic-user."
"I have to go Ciel. I have to make sure that he no longer has the ability to harm anyone of you."
"But who knows what may happen to you!" Ciel's sudden exclamation was surprising and you pressed your lips together upon seeing the desperate expression that was on his face. "What happens if you never come back? How do you think the others will take it? How do you think I will cope with it?" The earl bit the bottom of his lip, the motion expressing the apprehensive and anxiousness that he felt.
This time the smile that was on your face was genuine and you placed a hand onto the earl's shoulder. "Don't worry Ciel. Nothing is going to happen to me while I'm there. Trust me." Pulling him towards you, you pulled the younger boy into a tight hug. "I promise. Once I deal with Malcom I'll come straight back." You kept your words resolute to mask the unease that truly boiled inside. You didn't want Ciel to see the worry that you also felt as there was no telling if you would return to the Phantomhive Manor.
Soon enough you pulled back. The same worried look was on the earl's face, but he seemed to have come to the conclusion that he couldn't convince you not to go.
"Be careful alright," he whispered, watching as you picked up the book and turned it to the page you once had been on.
With a last look at the earl along with another smile, you read over the spell.
"Say, day to night I send myself with flight back to the place I came from."
That cold rippling sensation that you had once felt all those months ago spread its way across your skin and making you shiver and in the next second only Ciel was left standing in the room.