When Gaara heard that Naruto Uzumaki was getting married, he had to sit down and catch his breath. He had sat with his hands folded in his lap, tired eyes focused down on his clean white robes, and tried his hardest to collect himself again. Gaara stared down at the envelope on his desk for what felt like hours, not wanting to open it and read the words he dreaded. He took in a deep breath, held it for a few moments, and then let it go slowly. It didn't do much to help with the millions of dreadful thoughts that raced through his head, or the feeling of his heart caving in on itself, but it was all he could do in that moment to remain calm.
He had already decided, before opening the invitation, that he would not be attending.
Gaara pushed the invitation to the side of his desk and tried desperately to lose himself in the piles of paperwork.
"Kind of unexpected, but I'm happy for them," Temari had commented later that same afternoon and Gaara's appetite for the lunch in front of him was gone.
"I don't want to talk about this." He said quietly after a moment, staring down into his teacup.
"Why not?" Temari asked, an eyebrow raised, "I thought you'd be happy for them."
"Happy?" He repeated weakly, a furrow to his brow, "How could I be happy?"
Temari was taken back by his tone and the hurt that shone so clearly in his eyes.
"It's not-" She paused, trying to find the words before saying, "Did you even open the invitation?"
He was silent and that was an enough of an answer for her. Temari set her food aside and shifted through his desk before she found the unopened envelope under a few scattered papers.
"Don't," Gaara sighed, "I can't-"
Despite his protesting, Temari opened the seal on the envelope and pulled out the elegant paper. She cleared her throat, skimming over words she had already read on her own invitation, before reading aloud.
"You are cordially invited to attend the wedding of Naruto Uzumaki- "
"Temari-"
" 'and Hinata Hyuga'."
Gaara had reached out to take the card from her but he paused halfway through, her words processing slowly. Temari met him halfway and handed him the card, and Gaara wasted little time in looking it over. He must have reread 'Hinata Hyuga' a thousand times, almost expecting the words to change before his eyes.
"It surprised Kankuro and I too." Temari said reassuringly, before stating a little softer, "Listen, Gaara. There's a good chance she's going to be there, I can't promise you she won't be. But...Naruto is your friend, you should go."
He was relieved to see that Naruto was not marrying who he had feared he would, but the anxiety he had felt before had only shifted to a new thought. It was incredibly likely that they would meet again- was he ready for that? They left off on decent terms, as decent as they could have been for the situation they had been in, but that didn't mean that they were ever guaranteed to meet again. Especially so soon. The last few years had felt like they dragged on forever but now that he was given the chance to see her again, they felt like only seconds. Like he had just watched her fade into the distance yesterday.
"Kankuro and I are going," Temari finally said, "I think you should, too."
And he did. They sent their reply that yes, all three siblings would be in attendance, and Gaara spent the next month hardly thinking of anything else. He was happy for Naruto, of course, but the anxiety and pressure of seeing her again nearly suffocated him. What if she ignored him? (That was unlikely- or was it?)What if she had found someone else? (That was far too likely, Gaara thought dreadfully). What if she just didn't want to see him at all? She could have been a completely different person for all he knew, as unrecognizable as a stranger, and it took Gaara every ounce of courage he could find to walk through the gates of Konoha when the time came.
Though the excitement of the wedding and seeing old friends took up most of his time, Gaara couldn't shake the nervousness that he felt every time he turned a corner. Since the moment he stepped through the gates he had expected to see her right in front of him, but that didn't happen. He didn't see her the first day, or the rehearsal dinner, or even at the ceremony. Someone had told him that she had been there, but from his limited view in the seat he was given towards the front on Naruto's side of the aisle, he couldn't see her. It would have been impolite to turn around in his chair and look around in the middle of the ceremony, so Gaara had to sit face forward and clench at his robes until his knuckles turned white.
The reception was held in an event hall on top of Hokage Rock, where the windows overlooked all of the village. It was a beautiful ceremony, and an even more beautiful reception. Family and old friends gathered in the large hall to celebrate the union, a moment of happiness after the dread that had come with the war, and Gaara found himself feeling more at ease than he had in awhile. It had been a hard few years, but being here surrounded by the people he had come to call friends was a pleasant change from the loneliness he had grown used to. He had almost forgotten all about her during the reception, so caught up in the happy laughter and chatter that came with weddings that she didn't cross his mind again until he had separated from the crowds to take a moment for himself outside on the balcony. Gaara leaned against the railing as he looked out over the village. It was a beautiful day and a beautiful view- perfect for a wedding.
And it made him think of her again, of the wedding they had attended together the night he confessed his love for her. He couldn't help but think their own wedding would have been something like this, filled with laughter of friends and family, beautiful and perfect. The thought of it made his heart give a dull throb, one he had grown rather used to in the past few years. It's the way he always felt when he thought of her, the way he would feel until the very end. Gaara was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he hardly paid much mind to the sound of the glass door of the balcony opening, and the soft clicking of heels after it shut.
"You really came,"
The voice made him freeze, his whole body going stiff and his grip on the wine glass in his hand so tight it cracked. For years he had heard this voice in dreams and strained to hear it in memories, and now here it finally was after all this time. He knew this would happen, that he would see her again, but now that the moment was here it still felt like it took him by surprise. His whole body ached, knowing she was so close again and yet so far. A part of him didn't want to turn around, instead wanted to keep his back to her and avoid any further pain that could come from seeing her again.
"Gaara," She said, softly, and hearing his name so sweetly on her lips took the breath from his lungs. At the sound of it he couldn't help but reluctantly relax (if only a little), that distant but familiar warmth flooding through his heart, and he finally turned to face Momoko after so many years.
She had changed so much and yet not at all. Her hair had been kept short, brushing against the tops of her shoulders in pale waves. The scar on her forehead had healed completely, the crude kanji displayed loudly on her skin. He had expected her to bare her other scars just as plainly, but the off-shoulder straps of her tight indigo dress showed her arms had been covered with tattoos in the years apart. One arm was covered in prettily inked daisies and lisianthus, and on the other was only mapira lilies. They were placed conveniently over scars, completely covering the crude words and jagged skin in dark black ink. The tattoos gave her an edge she didn't have in the past, one that was only accented by the slight muscle mass she had seemed to gain in the last few years. She hardly looked the dainty young woman he had met, and yet she had never looked more beautiful in his eyes.
Her pale gaze stared at him the same way they had in the beginning: softly, as though she was patiently waiting for him. Despite the changes she had undergone in the years past, Gaara still thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever had the pleasure of meeting. The sight of her still made his heart race and his chest tight, and these symptoms only heightened as she stepped forward to join him, standing at his side with her own glass in hand as they overlooked the village.
Together they stood in silence, Momoko watching the village as he watched her. He drank in the sight of her freckled cheeks and pale skin as though he was dying of thirst, and soon she turned to do the same. For a while they simply stared, looking over features they had long since memorized and faces they knew by heart. Maybe they were looking for something that had changed, something that proved they weren't really themselves anymore. Enough time had passed to where they could have been strangers again at this point; however, there was no such feeling. It was a warmth that always came when being reunited with an old friend, that weightlessness of the months and years being lifted off their shoulders.
"I didn't think you would come," She admitted, and he watched her lips as she spoke.
"I almost didn't," Gaara replied, his gaze flickering up to meet hers, "I was..." He trailed off, unable to find the words right then.
"Worried?" Momoko finished for him and Gaara nodded without a word, "I ran into Kankuro on my way out here. After he squeezed the life out of me he told me that you thought I was the one marrying Naruto."
"Of course he did," He sighed softly, "I hope he wasn't too rough with you."
"It's nothing I couldn't handle," She replied, a tone in her words he had never heard before, "I think I did just as much damage hugging him back."
"You do seem a little more...athletic." Gaara commented, his eyes flickering down to her toned arms before he turned his gaze away again.
"I've been spending a lot of time with an old friend of yours, Rock Lee," Momoko replied pleasantly, "He's been teaching me how to fight."
"Fight?" He questioned, curiosity clear in his gaze.
"It's just self defense," Momoko clarified, "No ninjutsu or...genjutsu, or anything like that. But I've gotten pretty good at taijutsu- I could probably take you down." She teased, and the playfulness almost took him by surprise, but he couldn't find it in himself for even a moment to reject it.
"Is that so?" Gaara hummed, amusement clear in his eyes.
"It is so," Momoko nodded her head, her pale eyes just a little brighter, "We'll have to spar sometime so I can prove it to you."
The implication of her words, that there would be another time after this, made him smile ever so slightly. She couldn't help but stare at the sight: the soft look in Gaara's eye, the sun setting behind him and bouncing off his bright red hair so prettily. It made her heart beat heavy in her chest, just like it always did when she thought of him.
For a moment they stood and simply stared again, taking in the wonderful sight that was the other after so many years. Despite the time apart and the changes to their appearances, and the worrying they had both done in the month leading up to this, Gaara and Momoko still recognized each other. He had been worried that in finding herself again she would be unable to forgive him or come back around in the slightest, and Momoko had been concerned that he may turn her away for taking so long to meet again. There was none of that, no hostility or uncertainty, only them.
"I like your tattoos." He finally managed to speak after a few moments and nearly scolded himself for how meek he sounded.
"I wanted to cover the scars," Momoko replied softly and he nodded without a word.
Instinctively, he reached out to take her arm and bring it closer for him to see, but Gaara remembered himself before making contact. He stopped, letting his hand hang in the air, and his eyes flickered up from the ink to meet her gaze. Momoko watched him, eyes flickering down to the hand extended for her before meeting his gaze again, and soon she nodded without a word. Gently, he laid his hand on her arm and basked in the feeling of touching her again after so many years. There was no tension of the time that passed, nothing in them that said he shouldn't and couldn't be touching her; this touch came as naturally as breathing.
"Daisies for your mother," Gaara said, his throat feeling tight, "Lisianthus for your father."
The look in her eyes melted to something a little more tender.
"And the lilies?" He asked after a moment, feeling in his heart like he knew the answer but dreading the idea of being wrong.
"Mapira," She said softly, and took his hand from her arm to hold it in her own, "For you."
Had they been in the right place and had this been the right time, he may have wept. But he didn't, instead stared at the inked lilies as his eyes began to sting, and Momoko didn't say another word as she held his hand in her own. They turned back to the village and looked out over the buildings and to the setting sun, content to simply enjoy the feeling of their hands held so tightly together.
The best thing about love is that it never truly dies, no matter what it may go through. It could dim over the years, grow weaker and duller if not nurtured, but it would never fizzle out completely. Despite all the worrying if they would be able to find each other again or if they would be able to get past their loss, what they felt now was exactly what they had felt in the very beginning. It was a small spark in their hearts, one that was only fanned into a flame as they spent the rest of the night at each other's side. They talked with friends and with each other, their eyes bright with a happiness no one had seen in them in years. All the worries of the time passed had trickled away with every small smile and sideways glance, and for the first time in a long time, Gaara and Momoko felt complete again.
Gaara watched her as she talked to his brother, how the twinkling lights of the reception made her eyes sparkle and how she almost smiled behind the rim of her glass. Her gaze shifted to him as Kankuro spoke and their eyes met for a moment. The look on her face softened just a little, and he knew the thought that ran through her mind right then, because it ran through his as well. She reached out, slipping her hand into his own and holding it gently, and Gaara smiled too.
When morning came the pale rays of sun peeked through the curtains and stirred him from his sleep, and his fingers tightened around hers for just a moment. A soft hum sounded from his lips, deep and rumbling, and Momoko had to resist the urge to kiss him as he finally woke. His eyes lazily shifted open, blurring in and out of focus, until the sight of her became very clear.
She looked like an angel with the light of the sun bouncing off her blonde hair and the pale blue of her gaze watching him tenderly. Once again, for the first time in so very long, he debated the necessity of a heaven if she was not a part of it.
The world came back to them slowly, gently, but they were content to lay naked in each other's arms for a while longer and ignore it. They held each other close, as though they hadn't just spent the whole night through touching and feeling what had once been out of reach. For a while there were no words, only their locked gaze and the relief of being in each other's arms again. When it did come time to speak, it was Gaara who did so, tender and sure.
"Marry me."
And she smiled, soft and beautiful, the way she had so many years ago, and Gaara knew she would.