~ double update :) ~
~ but i love you. i'm totally and completely in love with you, and i don't care if you think it's too late. i'm telling you anyway ~
"Penelope I know you know," I sigh out in frustration, rubbing my pointer finger up and down the bridge of my nose. There wasn't a way she didn't know.
She just continues typing, not daring to look up, "Look Hotch. You broke her heart okay?" that was rhetorical, "She had every reason and every right to not want to talk to you or have you try to reach out to her so well I am aware of Dani's location I promised her I wouldn't give it to you and I'm going to keep that promise." she rattles out, the clicking of her keyboard getting more aggressive as she went.
"Garcia."
She stops typing and instead waits as the ringing of a phone sounds around her 'cave'.
'Rossi.'
"Rossi please come get this depressing puppy out of my wonderful cave of wonders, he's dampening my mood with his 'what if' attitude, I would appreciate you removing him from my premises."
I look down at her in faint disbelief, really? It wasn't long till David had walked into the room, raising his eyebrows at me. I don't take the time to even roll my eyes at this and instead walk out of Garcia's office and into mine. I had paperwork to do anyway, I had promised Jack I would be home more often and now that he's getting older it's important to keep those promises.
Dave follows close behind me, although I pay no mind. I didn't need one of his talks at the moment.
"Aaron."
I pause right in front of my desk, my eyes drifting the picture frame of Dani and Jack that sat right next to the one of Haley and us. "You know she was the only one besides you in this whole building that called me Aaron." another rhetorical question.
Rossi stays silent. "I don't know what to do anymore," I admit, taking a seat at my desk.
"Well how do you feel."
"About her or about the situation."
"Aaron it's been 4 years.."
I look up at him with desperation in my eyes, "I still love her. I- I wasn't supposed to but I can't make myself stop."
Dave takes a seat in front of me, most likely aware it was going to be a long talk.
I glance back at the picture of Dani, "You know she never said I love you to me." I quietly say.
David looks up at me and shakes his head, "Aaron she loved you. She wouldn't have left if she didn't."
I place my head in my hands, "Loved."
"You aren't going to get her back by sitting here and wallowing in your dumbassness."
"I fucked us up."
"Then fix it."
My eyes grow warm with tears and I look up at him with a mixture of annoyance and desperation, "I can't do anything about it." I snap.
"Talk to her."
"I can't even fucking find her."
"Aaron if you really wanted to you would have found her already."
"Really wanted to? David I've been looking for her since she left."
"Then look harder. Search, call, travel, if you love her that much find her. You have nothing to loose but everything to gain. If you don't try you're going to spend the rest of your life wondering the 'what ifs' and 'maybes'."
"I wouldn't even know where to start."
"You were her boss, who called you for a recommendation?"
"No one."
"Oh wait, that was me." he chuckles, placing a piece of paper on my desk.
I pick it up with haste, glancing at the name. David stands up, walking towards the door, "Oh and Aaron?" I glance up at him, "Dani will be over here in two weeks."
"Why didn't you just lead with that?" I ask, defeated.
He pierces his lips, "Because I wasn't supposed to know but Penelope can't keep a secret if her life depended on it."
I nod, glancing down at my paper work, "That's two weeks to figure out what to say to her to make her want to stay." he states, walking out.
Looking down at the paper it was a neatly written down phone number. I don't think twice before calling it, expecting some Interpol Director. Instead I got a familiar accented voice.
'Valentino.'
"Dani." I breath out.
I hear her breath hitch and something drop before she elegantly cusses. It silent for a moment before her voice fills my ears again, 'Aaron.' she simply states, her voice sounding as detached as ever.
I lean back in my chair, "I uh, I just wanted to call and check in."
She laughs slightly, though its humorless, 'You should have done that awhile ago, 4 years is a long time.' she comments.
I nod, "Ya, ya it is." it's quiet again, and I hear her shuffle around slightly, "So I-" I stop myself, shaking my head, "I know how much you hate small talk to I'll just get to it."
'Appreciated'
"Dani, I just need to know that you're okay." I carefully say.
I hear her let out a breath, 'Aaron I'm fine okay, all glued back together again. Brand new.'
I'm silent for a moment, "Jack misses you."
'I miss him too.'
Another moment of silence follows, "I miss you." I admit softly. It was the truth. I missed her so much I had no words to describe the feeling. I never wanted something so badly in my life. I needed her. I missed her jokes, her with Jack, her with me, her with the team. I missed everything about Danielle and it was moments like this that I wished I had quit my job as soon as Strauss decided on the end game. God I missed us.
'I miss you too Aaron but-' she cuts herself off, 'I'm going to mute myself for a second.' and she does so without a response from me. I stay silent lost in my thoughts about her. Dani hated clichés but I secretly loved them. They helped me remember that not everything was as bad as what I see everyday. I think our story was cliché in the sense of FBI agent falls in love with 'enemy' but she wasn't the enemy. And if Strauss took the time to actually talk to her, she would know that.
'Uh, Aaron.'
"Yes."
'There's- I- I'm coming to Virginia in two weeks. I really need to tell you something-'
"Then tell me."
'In person, I need to tell you in person. You should uh, come to the party...' she trails off. It seems like she was whispering to someone for a second before she continues, 'It's going to be at Dave's.' she simply says.
I laugh slightly, "Is he aware?"
'Is he ever?'
*
Jack blows out the candle for Haley, he was 9 now but he still found joy in doing the small activity with me before I tuck him in. Pulling blanket up and under his chin, I kiss his forehead.
"Jack, do you remember Dani?" I ask.
He looks at me in disbelief, "Dad I just asked you about her yesterday."
"Right. Well she's coming to visit in like two weeks and she invited us to this party.."
"Is this you inviting me so you don't have to go alone in case she doesn't show?"
I shake my head at my child's antics, "No." yes.
He just shakes his head at me and flicks off his lamp, "Well I'm going because I miss her." he confidently states.
I smile at him, "Sounds good."
"And because my dad's a scaredy cat."
"Go to bed."