You'll need this!
usernames:
Dean = Daddy Issues
Percy = Sea Booty
May = One Punch Bitch
Annabeth = eat the Weak
Jameson = Holy Funky Beats
Maurice = Wasabitch
Boss = God?
Cynthia = The Only Good One
Sam = google was my idea
Lydia = not from Teen Wolf
Susan = ok boomer
Samantha = ha funny
Gibby = GIBBBYYY
Lucy = tinfoil hat
Nicole = me for president
Lauren = magic school bus dropout
Diane = avocadorable
Adrian = im still here
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Group Chat: The Pretty Committee
Holy Funky Beats: who put the bread on the top shelf? how am i supposed to reach it??
me for president: Grow.
Holy Funky Beats: this is bullying. i dedicate my entire life to our lord and savior @God? and this is the thanks i get? i'll have you know i am a perfectly respectable height and you're just jealous that i can get more hoes than you
me for president: I don't need anymore hoes in my life. One is enough.
avocadorable: wow, thanks bby
Daddy Issues: this is nice and all but Percy went to murder someone and hasn't texted me back
eat the Weak: Okay but he does this a lot. I don't know why you're surprised.
Daddy Issues: im not, he hasn't texted me back >:(
google was my idea: He probably turned off his phone again cause you were bothering him.
Daddy Issues: he can't ignore me forever. im the only one that knows the password to the WiFi by heart
One Punch Bitch: I don't know why, he's lived there for five years???
eat the Weak: Is that a question?
One Punch Bitch: All I have are questions
google was my idea: lmao mood
Wasabitch: ...
Wasabitch: what am i reading? im so confused and scared
magic school bus dropout: Percy went to murder someone
Wasabitch: oh okay that makes sense. anyone know good Mexican restaurants? i have a need for beans
God?: Why are you like this?
Wasabitch: beans, sir
im still here: Good news, guys!!! I'm coming back home in two days!
tinfoil hat: oh i forgot about you
im still here: (;'༎ຶٹ༎ຶ') Lucy why
tinfoil hat: lol
ha funny: Wow, Lucy just killed Adrien
magic school bus dropout: F
Wasabitch: f
Daddy Issues: f
google was my idea: F
One Punch Bitch: F
avocadorable: f
eat the Weak: F
God?: F
me for president: F
Holy Funky Beats: f
The Only Good One: f
not from Teen Wolf: F
ok boomer: f
GIBBBYYY: F
Sea Booty: f
Daddy Issues: Percy! why didn't you answer my texts? >:(
Sea Booty: i didn't feel like it at the time. i have good news and bad news
One Punch Bitch: When do you not?
Sea Booty: shut up. okay sooooo i may or may not have stabbed Richard,,,, a few times
eat the Weak: PERCY
God?: ... How many times?
magic school bus dropout: lmao the only question that matters
not from Teen Wolf: A valid one too
Sea Booty: i lost count
google was my idea: After five?
Sea Booty: ha fake laugh hiding real pain
Wasabitch: stop quoting Deadpool and get a life
Sea Booty: just because you like DC better doesn't mean you have to make fun of better quality work
The Only Good One: what did Richard's wife do?
Sea Booty: oh hER
Holy Funky Beats: i have a bad feeling and not because i think Percy's cursed
ha funny: oh worm
Sea Booty: so *ahem*
Sea Booty: anyone know any good divorce counseling centers?
eat the Weak: No you didn't
Sea Booty: oh yes i did
Sea Booty: her royal bitchness may be a bitch but even she doesn't deserve a dude that cheats on her with anything that moves- no offense cynthie
The Only Good One: none taken
God?: Where are you now?
Sea Booty: wouldn't you like to know
ok boomer: say hi to her for me uwu
Sea Booty: how do you KnOw?
ok boomer: :)
Wasabitch: she knows All
google was my idea: Wait, what's going on?
One Punch Bitch: Percy's visiting his mom finally
Daddy Issues: oh nice! tell her i said hiii
Sea Booty: sure okay i gotta go Estelle wants to play
me for president: Aw big bro Percy never gets old
avocadorable: except when it does
magic school bus dropout: lmao
Dean grinned at his phone, shaking his head as he stood up from the small dining table in the apartment. His friends were great and he loved them so much, even Maurice and his bean addiction. Putting the cellular device in his pocket, he grabbed his keys and wallet from the kitchen counter. "Sammy, I'm going out!"
"What? Why? It's almost midnight!"
"Don't worry about it."
Ignoring Sam's next few words, Dean took out his phone to shoot off a text to someone, tilting his head as he thought of the best words to use.
Daddy Issues: @Wasabitch im coming for you
Wasabitch: what? wait what?
Wasabitch: dean what does that mean?
Wasabitch: @Daddy_Issues ???
GIBBBYYY: lmao run bitch run!!!
God?: Go the fuck to sleep, you little shits.
Satisfied with the message he sent and the chaos it created, he ran down the steps from the apartment, getting in the impala. Once he was in, he sighed and leaned his head on the steering wheel. As much as he wanted to keep joking, there was something that as bothering him and he felt that Maurice would be able to help him. Aside from Percy, Sam, and the cousins, Maurice was someone that he hung out with sometimes, going to different restaurants and getting the strangest food combinations in an attempt to psych the other out.
Beans, sir: in all seriousness man, you good? (seen 11:43pm)
Me: kind of??? yeah
(seen 11:43)
Beans, sir: ah so no (seen 11:44pm)
Beans, sir: well you know my door's unlocked. and even if it wasn't you know how to get it
(seen 11:44pm)
Me: haha yeah :)
(seen 11:45pm)
Starting the car, Dean pulled out of the parking lot, not even in the mood to put on his music. He just drove in silence, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel in time with his racing thoughts.
Did he want to know the answer to the questions in his head? If yes, would he be alright with what he gets? What would change?
"Everything..."
The hunter didn't even realize he arrived at Maurice's house until the man himself rolled across the hood of his car dramatically, flopping down on the ground.
"Dude, what the heck?" Dean laughed, opening his door to look at his friend playing dead.
Maurice opened one of his eyes to peer at him, his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth. "Can I sue you for hitting me with your car?"
"Yeah, if i wasn't already parked."
"Damn, okay." He got up quickly, brushing off his pants like nothing happened. "Come on, man, I just got some good shit today. You'll like it."
Dean shut off his car, fully stepping out of it. After locking the doors, he followed his friend into his house. "It better be actual good beer, dude."
"You wouldn't know good beer if it danced the hula on your bed with streamers and a g-string."
"Wow, okay."
When the two men went to the kitchen, Dean leaned on the counter while Maurice rummaged around his fridge for beer and snacks. He took a look around the place, at the mismatching stools, the couch that looked like it had seen better days but still felt like a cloud, and the pictures of his friends that he couldn't bear to take down even if they did have his toxic ex in some of them. It was homey and nice, even if the hot water didn't work in the bathrooms that well and the kitchen smelled like beans at random hours.
"So, what did you want to talk about?" Maurice wondered, emerging from his fridge with a case of beer and a container of bean dip. He zipped over to the pantry, grabbing the chips, before ushering the Winchester back to the living room. "Girls? Boys? Others? Percy?"
"Um. No?" He grabbed a beer before flopping down on the couch. "I have questions. There's some weird shit going on that I'd figure you'd know about since, you know."
"Offended."
"Shut up. So, the diner has been acting weird."
Maurice nodded. "Yeah, Jameson almost died like a little bitch."
Dean snorted. "You're the one that hit my car with your body. That's besides the point. Everyone's been all hushed up about something and I swear I saw Nicole walking around with a sword."
"Okay, first off, that's Nicole. But, yeah, some of us have been all... Weird..."
"Is Percy one of them?"
"Percy is weird embodiment but... Look, man, I'm going to tell you a secret that you can't tell anyone, not even Jesus."
Dean blinked. "I'm not religious."
"Even better. So... I may or may not be a Greek demigod."
The Winchester was silent for a moment, going over that in his head. "Not even surprised. Who's your parent?"
"Demeter, goddess of the harvest, grain, and other shit."
"Beans?"
"No."
"Oh."
"You're really not surprised?"
Dean shrugged. "I hunt the supernatural when I'm bored- but only bad ones."
Maurice nodded, looking around awkwardly. "Alright, well... Anymore questions?"
The Winchester took a big gulp of his beer. "Yeah, a few. Is the whole diner full of demigods?"
"No, we have some clear-sighted mortals that work for us like Adrien and Nicole."
"Okay and what about the monsters that have been walking around? No one seems to notice them and when I point them out to Sam he has to squint to even notice that they're right in front of him."
Maurice lifted his hand in the air slightly as he thought about what he was going to say. "Greek monsters aren't visible to mortals that can't see through the Mist- capital m. The Mist makes the monsters seem like strange animals and stuff to mortals. I guess Sam sees them like little blues as if he took of a pair of glasses or something. Does this make sense? May is usually better at explaining this shit to people."
"May isn't a mortal?"
Maurice gave him an unimpressed look.
"Yeah, okay, I should have expected that..." Dean leaned back in the couch, rubbing his face tiredly with one hand. "Man..."
"Look, if you want to leave the diner-"
"Oh, fuck that, I'm not leaving." The Winchester uncovered his face to reveal a grin. "This is fucking awesome. It makes sense, too, about the area. How come there's so many monsters, though?"
Maurice sighed, scooping up a big glob of bean dip into his mouth. When he was finished eating it, he pointed at the hunter with a chip. "The stronger the demigod, the more monsters that'll come. They give off this scent to those fuckers that attract them. Unfortunately- or fortunately depending on how you see it- we have the most powerful demigod working at the diner."
"Wait, what?" Dean sputtered into his beer, wiping his face with the back of his hand. "Most powerful? Who? May?"
"You'd think so but no. How about this, you try and find out and I'll tell you if you're right or not. But-" He grabbed a throw blanket, tucking it around this legs. "We'll start tomorrow, I'm tired. Good night." With that, Maurice fell asleep immediately, his chip dangling precariously from his fingers.
"Some demigod." Dean muttered before snatching the chip, eating it. He made sure the rest of the food was safely on the coffee table before lifting up his friend. He slung the man over his shoulder and rolled his eyes at the fact that he didn't even stir.
After throwing the man onto his bed, Dean left and made sure the door was locked behind him. He got into the impala, starting it up, before heading back to his home. "Well, alright, there's that now. Not bad."
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words: 1,935
song: Do I Wanna Know - Arctic Monkeys (audio)