POLAR

By elisimone_

80.5K 2.5K 1.1K

in which two people are quite literally polar opposites... #1 in jasper category 4/29/2021 #8 in mates categ... More

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3.6K 130 69
By elisimone_

*** 

I walked through the halls of the school in a pair of leggings and the school hoodie going towards the cafeteria with a duffle bag on my shoulder as I huffed in satisfaction. I'd tried out for the track team today, and I'd just got out of practice. I thought that I'd have to join other teams to keep my joints from locking since I thought I'd have less time to run in my wolf form, but I found myself in the forest that seemed to cover every inch of this town, so trying out was mostly for precautions. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to be on the team, so maybe it was just a waste of time. 

Plus, it wasn't hard to get out at night, and sometimes I'd even sleep outside and come back early the next morning. Charlie always went to sleep a little on the earlier side, and Bella liked her space so it was easier than I'd imagined. 

Soon I'd arrived, noticing eyes on me as soon as I walked in.

Yep, still the new kid. 

I turned to see Jasper there sitting at his table with his family. I wink at him, catching his small grin before I walk to sit next to Bella who sat with Jessica, Angela, Mike, and Eric. I couldn't even say hello to anyone before Eric began with his antics.

"La Push baby, you in?" he asked, a large smile on his face as he leaned on the palms of his hands to lean towards me. I quirked an eyebrow before I chuckled. 

"La Push?" I asked as he nodded his head. 

"La Push beach, down at the Quileute rez. We're all going after school. Big swell coming in," he said as he raised his arms, gesturing to Mike.

"And I don't just surf the internet," Mike said with a wink, which kind of made me want to snap his or my own neck right there.

The Quileute rez?

'Maybe we should go?' Adrea suggested.

'Why the hell would we do that? They'll try to tear us to shreds if we go down there' I questioned.

'Emphasis on the try part Audre' Adrea reminded a small laugh in her words.

I smirk a bit to myself. 

'Plus, they'll never do anything with humans around, well as long as we don't make them too mad' Adrea said again.

I almost chuckled, before I looked up at a hopeful Eric with a shrug. 

"Sure, I love to surf," I said as I finally dropped my duffle bag on the ground with a thud, followed by me dropping my backpack before I snag the apple off of Bellas tray, biting into it. 

"Yes!" Eric said with a fist pump. I rolled my eyes a bit watching as Bella rolled her eyes, huffing at me. I chuckle, winking at her, seeing her smile a bit before she got up, walking over to the salad bar. 

I chuckle a bit, as I watched her walk away, taking another bite of the apple. The group talks, with me just barely paying attention before the talking ceased as footsteps neared me from behind. I breathed in deeply, before sighing with a smile on my face. I looked seeing the group of humans in front of me staring behind me with wide eyes. 

"Audre?" I hear his angelic voice speak. 

Feigning confusion for the sake of the people staring at me, I turned to look at him with a small smirk and a quirked eyebrow. 

"Yes?" I asked seeing the small smile come to his face. 

"May I speak with you?" he asked. I glanced over to Bella who was engaged in a conversation with Edward.

"Yeah, sure," I said. I grabbed the strap of my backpack, going to get my duffle bag, but he'd beaten me to it.

I scoffed at the smug look on his face but nodded at him as he led me out the cafeteria, and out into the hallway.

"So, what did you want to talk about stranger?" I asked mockingly. He chuckled as he took one of his hands, grabbing ahold of my waist, the other reaching to stroke my face with his thumb as he gave me a loving kiss. I smiled into the kiss as I stroke his arm lovingly. 

"You're going to La Push?" he asked. I chuckle as I pulled away from him, leaning on the lockers as I nodded.

"Yea, I'm going surfing," I said as I crossed my arms with a smile. 

"Darling, you don't think that maybe that's not the best idea?" he asked as he sat down the duffle bag. 

"I thought so too, but Adrea said that they wouldn't dare attack me with humans around. Makes sense, and I'm a little curious. I've only met two Quileute's, one who was a child like me, but he wasn't aware of his... abilities. The other was his father, but he didn't know about me since Lydia put a spell on me when I'd come to Forks," I told him with a shrug. 

Unfortunately, I could still feel the worry within him, making me reach up, clutching my chest a bit before I reached up and touched his cheek. 

"I'll be careful, don't worry Jas," I said giving him a reassuring smile. He smiled, placing his hand on top of mine as he leaned into my touch, another smile gracing my lips as I stared at the beautiful man in front of me. 

"How can I not worry?" he said softly. He turned his head, kissing my hand softly.

"Oh baby," I said quietly, as I laughed a bit before I brought him into a hug. 

"You know I would invite you, but I don't think you're exactly allowed over there," I said, hearing him chuckle. 

He pulled away, dipping a bit to give me a loving kiss on the forehead. 

"Please, be careful," he told me. I still felt his worry, but I nodded, as he pressed his head to mine.

"Always," 

***

I stand in a cold beach bathroom changing into my wet suit, adjusting my hair, regretting coming to the beach already because I now knew I'd have to take my braids out tonight due to the sand. I take a breath before I exit the bathroom, flipping my hair as I did so, taking hold of my board as I walked to where Bella was.

Bella with her friends, surrounded by 2 soon to be wolves, and one Alpha.

I growled a bit under my breath before I made my way to them. 

"Woah, you're really surfing Audre? Is there anything you can't do?" Bella asked with a laugh. This made the 3 that she was standing with, turn to look at me, the Alpha stiffening a bit at the sight of me, no doubt catching my scent.

"I can't fish if I'm being honest," I said with a shrug. 

Well with a rod anyway. 

"Audre?" one of the boys said. I quirked my eyebrow.

'Bitch that's Jacob Black, stupid' Adrea chimed.

'Can you shut the fuck up and stop being so mean to me, you just being mean to your fucking self' I said annoyed as she laughed.

Still, my eyes light up a bit at the sight of him. He, Bella, and I would play all day when we were all here. He'd grown quite a bit, pretty muscly, but not a lot, and I could even sense that his shift was nearby. 

'He has Alpha blood in him, I can feel it' Adrea said again

"Jacob?" I asked. 

He laughed as he rushed forward scooping me up and hugging me. I laughed hugging him back. It was good to see him. He used to be so protective of Bella and me, I even remember him having a little crush on her, one that clearly hadn't gone away. He let me down with a large smile.

"I didn't know you were back in town, how long you staying?" he asked making me laugh uncomfortably and scratch my head. 

"Uh, Jake-" Bella tried, making me laugh as I shook my head. 

"It's fine Bells. I'm staying as long as I can Jakey," I said playfully pulling at his cheek making him swat my hand away as he laughed. 

"Uh this is Embry, and this is Sam," he introduced. I waved at both of them. 

"Audre. Audre Swan," I said as I held my hand out politely. Maybe we could come to an agreement or something, Sam and I of course. 

"Swan?! You two related or something?" Embry asked rhetorically with a laugh. Bella chuckled awkwardly making me laugh. 

"Yea, we're cousins," I told him. His eyes widened a bit as Jacob laughed at him.

"So what's this about keeping Bella company?" asked Jacob as he turned to Jessica. 

"Her date bailed," Jessica said in a feigned whisper, making me raise my eyebrow as I looked at Bella. 

"What date?" Eric asked. 

"She invited Edward," Jessica said. I couldn't help but chuckle a bit. 

"To be polite," Bella said, embarrassment covering her features. 

"I think it's nice she invited him. No one ever does," Angela spoke up. 

"Yea, cause the Cullen's are freaks," Mike said as he crossed his arms.

My anger flared as I glared at him, tightly clutching the board in my hand as I tried my best not to either break the board or lash out. 

"You got that right," Sam spoke up. My eyes snap to him, seeing him staring at me in confusion. 

"Oh Mike, your jealousy is showing," I said sticking my tongue out at him, watching as he became flustered before he looked away from me.

"You know them?" Bella asked.

"The Cullen's don't come here," Sam said sharply. 

"Well, I'll see you later Bella," I said smiling at her as I quickly walked away.

The smell of the beach took over my head as I walked on the sand, strapping the board to my ankle. I ignored my surroundings as I took to the waters, paddling out, calming down as I felt the water against my face.

I continued to paddle before I turned, sitting up on the board, as I watched for potential waves. I padded over a few before I noticed a particularly large wave coming my way. I took a breath, as I paddle towards it, before I adjusted myself, preparing for the impact of the wave. 

As I felt it inch closer I began paddling, before I stood up. My body moved off instinct along with a year or 2 of surf lessons as my body gracefully moved through the waves. I whooped loudly as I shifted my hips, my legs and arms moving almost in sync with the waves. 

Soon, my body began to wobble, knowing the wave would soon come apart as I let my body topple off the board. I held my breath, opening my eyes underwater, looking up at the crashing waves as I swam up, breaking the surface with a happy smile and a laugh. 

I did this for a while, simply enjoying myself. I didn't bother to look out for Bella because I knew Jacob was here. All it took was one short ass conversation for me to notice his little crush on her. I almost felt bad for him because she was mated to Edward. 

It'd been a couple of hours, and I wasn't even close to tired but I decided to paddle out of the water because I knew it was odd that I could maintain such stamina while human. 

I trudged out of the water, hastily unzipping the wet suit, it feeling uncomfortable once out of the water. I see Jacob and Bella sitting and talking on the sand a little ways away, and hear the excited screeches of Jessica as she plays in the water with Mike. 

Once I'd gotten the wetsuit off, I stood in my bikini, huffing as I stretched a bit beginning to generate a bit more heat, wanting to dry off as quickly as possible, plus it was pretty cold out here. I sat in the sand by myself with my legs close to my chest as I began to close my eyes, trying to enjoy the salty wind in my face. 

"So, Rogue,"

'And there it fucking is' Adrea chuckled. 

I looked up to see Sam and two others who I didn't know. I huffed as I leaned back on my hands, throwing my head back in slight annoyance before a smirk came to my face. 

"Yes, Alpha?" I taunted with a chuckle. He growled a little. 

"Oh calm down, it's just your title," I said as I rolled my eyes a bit. I look over at the other two, both radiating a similar kind of authority.

"Let me guess, Beta," I said as I pointed towards one who had a soft sort of look in his eye.

"Gamma," I said as I pointed at the other, a strangely confident boy who hadn't stop glaring at me since he walked over. 

I stood up, stretching.

"What are you doing here?" asked the Beta. I scrunched up my eyebrows as I pointed at the board beside me. 

"No, what are you doing in La Push-- Forks even?" asked Sam. I chuckled as I looked to the ground. 

"You want to hear another joke or the depressing truth?" I asked as I put my hand on my hip. 

"Stop fucking around, just tell us why you're here?" said the frustrated Gamma. My eyes cast to the ground, a couple of shaky breaths leaving me before I looked back at them, probably not successfully covering up my sad expression as I looked at the three.

"Chief Swan is my Uncle and my closest living relative. I'll be living with him until further notice. I'm not here to cause any problems so there's no need to be so harsh," I told them with a hard stare as I shifted my hips.

"Do you want to stay a rogue?" Sam asked as I sigh, as I nodded my head.

"Charlie and Bella are the only pack I need," I told them as I cast my gaze over to Bella and Jacob who still sat talking to each other. 

"Jacob hasn't shifted has he?" I asked.

"How'd you figure?" asked Jared, a chuckle leaving his mouth. My eyebrows raised at his laugh. Why were they so nice? Honestly, I expected them to drag me away unnoticed and interrogate me. 

I mean, it wouldn't be the first time. 

"He smells like it, but not like you 3," I said before I turned my gaze to them. 

"There aren't many wolves around these days. Are you sure you wouldn't like to join? Being a rogue can be dangerous," Sam said as he crossed his arms, a concerned, soft look in his eyes. I raised an eyebrow as I looked at him weirdly. 

"I'm not like you all, I don't protect humans, Bella and Charlie are only an exception because they're family," I told them as I cocked out my hip and crossed my arms. 

"You're a Human Shifter aren't you?" Sam asked making the Beta and Gamma stare at him in confusion. 

"What's that?" the Gamma asked making me chuckle as I nodded at Sam. 

"We have many differences, but to simplify it we shift into wolves in the presence of the leeches, they shift into humans to evade hunters," Sam explained to them simply as they look over at me, with me nodding a bit. 

I hear a shift, making me turn my head to see Bella standing, knowing she now wanted to leave. 

"It's time for me to go. Though I already have my own little pack, if you ever need any extra muscle I'm sure you'll know where to find me," I told them as I begin to walk away.

"Wait," I heard the Beta say. I stop, turning around to face them. 

"One last question," Sam stated. 

"And what is that Sam?" I asked as I put my hand on my hip once again. 

"Why do you smell like one of those--" Sam is cut off

"Demons?" the Gamma said cutting him off as he let out a small growl. I smile at the thought of him. 

Jasper. 

"I'm mated to one,"

***

It was around 11 PM and here I sat criss-cross unbraiding my hair. Jasper sat behind as he helped me in the process. When I told him that I was taking them out, it was the cutest thing to see him offer to help me, even if it took a hot minute to get him to understand that you can just cut off the ends and then unbraid them. 

"They asked if you'd join their pack?" he asked. I nodded a bit as I took out the hair, dropping it in a trash bag. 

"Yea, I declined of course. I don't know how we would work if I was apart of a pack whose sole purpose is to hate you," I said with a laugh. 

"...Do you, want to be apart of a pack?" he asked. The uncertainty in his voice made me turn around to face him, watching as he looked at me concerned. 

"Jas, a pack isn't just a group of wolves with a couple of people in charge," I said as I brought my hand up to caress his face with my thumb.

"Plus, I already have one. Charlie is apart of my pack, Bella is apart of my pack. My godmother and godfather are apart of my pack even if we're far apart. Jas, you are apart of my pack. I've never been this happy before, I already love what I have," I told him with a kind smile. 

His eyes shined as he looked at me, leaning into my touch. He pulled me forward by my waist, bringing his lips to mine. I hummed a little, as his other hand reached under one of my legs and pulled, bringing me into a straddling position.

I rolled my hips into him, a groan leaving his mouth. I pull away with a chuckle. 

"And I'm the tease?" he mocks. I roll my eyes with a small laugh as I kiss him once more before sliding off of him and turning around. It only took a bit more time, and some added speed until we'd taken all of the braids out.

"So, what was the purpose of those?" he asked curiously. 

"It protects my hair, and since I'm not touching it, it grows at a faster pace, and it also saves time in the morning," I told him.

"See," I told him as I pulled a crinkled strand of hair, pulling it until it stopped, which is at about my elbow. His eyes widened as he looked at it leaning forward a bit.

"You're the cutest," I told him with a smile. He rolled his eyes as walked towards me, clasping his hands around my face.

"I like your hair like this, will it stay like this?" he asked as I shrugged.

"Kind of, I convinced Bella to drive an extra 30 minutes to the only hair store that sells products for my hair in Forks so I stocked up on my products. It'll be like this for maybe a month or two or until I find a reliable stylist," I told him as I gestured towards the large black bag with a yellow smiley face on it that sat at my vanity.

He smiles at me. 

"There's always something to learn about you," he said. I looked at him a little confused but didn't question it as he brought his lips to mine. 

He stayed with me that night, lounging in my bed as I showered and washed my hair, then watched me intently as I applied all my products and whatnot. I'm not sure what he hoped to achieve in watching me since he knew that these products weren't for him, but it was nice to have the attention. 

He left at maybe 5 once we heard Charlies' heartbeat pick up, meaning he'd wake up soon. My hair had dried nicely, it sitting in a nice mix of curls and kinks that stopped right below my shoulders, shrinkage taking its toll. Today I dressed in a gray hoodie with YALE wrote in white across it. I also wore a pair of black ripped jeans and my trusty denim jacket. 

I put on some mint green Nike Smiley's, with my added large hoop earrings and a little makeup before I left my room and walked down you the stairs to see Charlie there like he always was, in his pajamas, his house slippers, and robe. 

"Oh, you took down your hair?" he asked. I nodded and smiled at him, making the same drink as I always did. 

"Oh Audre, you remember that diner, the Coffee Shop's hiring. I told them you were looking, so make sure to go on down there today," he told me. I smiled as I hug him. 

"Thank you, Uncle Charlie," I said. He chuckled at me he stroked my head and kissed my forehead. 

"No problem sweetheart," he said lovingly before I moved away from him, allowing him to pour his coffee. We sat in comfortable silence. After our little conversation, Charlie had begun to really tune into me, but he knew how I was, so he settled by picking up little things that he knew I needed.

He got me my own to-go cup for school, he picked up a pair of fluffy socks because he knows I like them, he even got me a set of keys that he said he kept forgetting to pick up. I knew that these things were little, but it was really sweet of him. 

After Bella hustled downstairs, we left for school, and the day dragged and dragged, with Bella, her friends, and I now sitting outside eating lunch. The sun was shining today, and Jasper had texted me that he wouldn't be at school because of it. I sent a picture of a disco ball back. 

I was a little sad without him here, but I still it was nice for the sun to be out for once. I loved the nature aspect of this town, but the lack of sun was still something I had to get used to. 

"Can I go with you?" I heard Bella ask Jessica as I stared at her in wonder. 

"Hey Bella, I have an interview at the diner, since you're going with Angela and Jessica can I take the truck?" I asked. She shrugged and nodded as she reached into her backpack and chucked the keys at me. 

"Are you going to prom Audre?" Jessica suddenly asks. My eyes widened as I shrugged. 

"Um I don't really know, I didn't really plan on it. Maybe?" I said with a shrug. 

"Okay if you do end up going, who's your date gonna be?" Angela asked as she wiggled her eyebrows. I shrugged again. 

"I don't know, maybe I'll go by myself. Prom is just an excuse to doll myself up, and if I do end up going by myself, at least I'll look good," I said with a shrug. 

"What about Jasper?" asked Jessica as she leaned forward. I raised an eyebrow. 

"What about him?" I asked mimicking her leaning forward action. 

"I've literally never seen him talk to anyone but his family, but he spoke to you the other day. Matter of fact, he came up to you, and carried your bag, so..." Jessica poked and prodded. 

"Come to think of it, on the field trip you guys were holding hands," Bella said thoughtfully. I glared at her.

Bitch, ain't we supposed to be family? 

Adrea laughed in my head at Bella. She loved Bella, to her, Bella's awkward nature and weird way of words were funny, and she thought she smelled nice too. 

"Holding hands?!" Jessica yelled making me flinch back. 

"Alright cut the shit, what's going on between you two?" Jessica asked, again. I just leaned on the palm of my hand about to answer her before my phone began to ring, Lydia, calling me. 

"Just to set the record straight, this phone ringing doesn't save me from anything because it's none of your business Jess," I told her sticking my tongue out childishly before I answered the call, walking away from the table for some privacy.

Soon my school day is over, and I'd dropped my resume off at the diner promptly, smiling and talking nicely to the workers and its manager before leaving to the police station after Bella had called to meet her there. I pulled up to see a sight that made me cackle like a madwoman.

Bella and Edward sitting in his car together, Bella clearly flustered. I bet Edward heard my laughter too because he looked up at me with a small glare. Nonetheless, I get out of the truck right as both Dr.Cullen and Uncle Charlie exited the building, a grim expression on his face. 

I furrowed my eyebrows as I stepped out of the car, making me walk over to them quickly with Edward and Bella on my tail.

"Carlisle, what happened?" Edward asked. 

"Waylon Forge was found in the woods out near his place. I just examined the body," Carlisle explained. I saw the look in their eyes as they spoke. 

"He died? How?" Bella asked, a horrified tone in her voice. 

"Animal attack," Carlisle spoke, making my eyes harden as I looked Uncle Charlie sympathetically as I moved forward giving him a warm hug. He smiled down sadly at me as I turned, still holding onto him, his arm around my shoulder as he clutched my shoulder in comfort.

'That was no damn animal' Adrea scoffed.

Edward glanced at me, an eyebrow quirked.

"The same kind that killed the security guard in Mason?" Bella asked. Now it was time for Edward, Carlisle, and I to subtly exchange looks. 

"Most likely," Carlisle said with a small nod. 

Charlie's emotions rolled off his body in waves, him trying to contain them with a straight face, and soon I was leading him into the station, rubbing his arm in comfort. 

Once we made it home, Uncle Charlie sitting at the kitchen table, evidence scattered on the desk as he went through it, a stressed look in his eye. I watched him quietly from afar. I understood now that Uncle and this, Waylon Forge were long-time friends. Bella and Charlie were a lot like each other in this aspect. 

I know Bella went to pick up a book on supernatural creatures when she went dress-shopping with Angela and Jessica. I knew because when I went into her room to retrieve a bobby pin, I found that she'd left the tab wide open. Now, here was Uncle Charlie, doing the work of a detective, scatterbrained as he went through every speck of evidence there was to the case. A case I knew would stay unsolved because like Adrea said earlier, that was no damn animal. 

Neither of them ever knew when to quit, both too stubborn for their own good. 

I walked forward, him taking notice of my presence, him looking up at me as he quickly trying to cover up his sadness with an unconvincing smile. I only sighed as I took a seat next to him. 

"You hungry?" I asked, a kind smile on my face. He sighed, leaning on one of his hands as he nodded tiredly. 

"I'll make you some coffee too," I told him as I stood up, kissing him on the forehead as I began to shuffle around the kitchen. 

As I cooked, Bella had come in and had her first conversation with Charlie that wasn't filled with awkward silence. Soon, I slid a plate of salmon, asparagus, and mash potatoes in front of him, along with a cup of coffee, tapping his shoulder as I did so. 

"Make sure to get some sleep tonight," I told him before I began to take my leave. 

"Audre," he called out softly making me turn around.

"Thank you," he says as he shifts the papers away, bringing the plate of food closer to him. I smiled at him with a nod. 

"No problem," I said with a smile as I put my hand on my hip.

"Holler if you need anything Uncle Charlie," I told him before I finally made my way upstairs and to my room, cracking the window before slumping on my bed. 

A small yawn came from my mouth as I closed my eyes. I was a little tired, having stayed up for almost 2 days. My senses dulled as I breathed in deeply, peace coming over me. That peace only lasted so long though, Bella bursting through the door with a deranged look in her eye.

"Now Bella what if I was naked?" I said with one eye open. She shrugs.

"We're family, I don't care," she said with a shrug. A book was in her hands as she leaped onto my bed with a small squeak. 

"Don't break your neck now," I said with a chuckle. 

I looked at the book, seeing the words 'Quileute Folk Stories and Art'.

"Audre, I know this is going to sound crazy, but I don't think the Cullens are even human," she said as she shoved the book into my hands. I quirk an eyebrow at her as I flip through the pages. 

"I don't care what you or Edward said, he didn't have an adrenaline rush, and he wasn't right there either. He ran and stopped the car with his hand. Oh, remember what that guy, uh what was his name? Sam! Did you hear how he spoke about the Cullens? Then Jacob started telling me these stories right, these stories about the 'Cold Ones', which is just a code for vampires. Then, when he saved me from those guys, he started talking about their thoughts, like he knew what they were thinking. And his hand!? Ugh, his hands were ice cold in the car, like weirdly cold, like he'd been holding onto to ice cubes all of his fucking life..." Bella continued to ramble and ramble about how the Cullens were vampires. 

"Okay but Bella," I finally spoke up, making her stop her rambling and look at me. 

"What are you going to do about it? You have a theory okay, and you apparently have evidence, so what now?" I asked as I gestured to the book I had in my hands.

"Wait, so... you believe me?" she asked looking at me with her big hopeful brown eyes. I sighed, rubbing my face as I shook my head. 

"I don't know, this is fucking insane Bells, even for you," I told her with a sigh before I straightened out my back. 

"But, what if you're right? You and I both know that there is only one way to know for sure," I told her as I tossed the book back at her, her fumbling with it before she finally had a firm grip on it. 

"You're right Audre," she said as she stood up determined. 

"But, what if I am right? Couldn't he kill me?" she asked, a small look of worry in her eye, plopping back onto my bed. A growl threatened to come from my throat.

"If he knows what's good for him, he won't lay a finger on you," I muttered to myself.

"Bella, if he wanted to kill you, he would've done it already. You just said he saved you right?" I asked. 

Honestly, I was the tiniest bit disappointed that I wasn't with her when this happened. What if she'd gotten seriously hurt? If Edward hadn't been there? I inwardly sigh, it was times like this I wish that we could have an actual pack bond so I knew if she was safe or not. 

"Right, right," she said as she nodded to herself. 

"Now, go downstairs and eat something please," I told her as I stood up, wrapping my arms around her in a hug. I heard her chuckle before I let her go, and she left my room with a wave.

Now finally, time for some sleep.

'Audre, your hair' Adrea tried to remind me.

'Bro, fuck this hair' I grumbled.

chappie number 4 :)))

i hope you're enjoying, um also another note, things may get slower with the chapters after a while, but do not worry, everything will be fine

drink water, eat please, love you guys

vote/comment !! 

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SEQEUL to 'Two Loves are Better than One'