❝𝑼𝒏𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅𝒔, 𝒉𝒐𝒍𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑲𝒖𝒂𝒕'𝒔 𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅 𝒊𝒔 𝒍𝒂𝒓𝒈𝒆𝒍𝒚 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒔. 𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒉𝒐𝒍𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑𝒚𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓.❞ -- 𝑺𝒆𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒕 𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒚𝒔𝒕
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"Why didn't you tell me you had a Padawan during New Year?"
Astrid and Anakin were lying on her bed in the afternoon light streaming through her window. Her head was propped up comfortably on Anakin's arm.
His body was turned towards her, but his eyes were on the wall, on her nuna-ball poster. He was running his fingers idly through her hair, and Astrid closed her eyes as she slowly relaxed at the soothing feeling.
"I didn't want you to feel like you weren't good enough to have a Padawan because you didn't have one yet," he replied softly. "I mean, I don't even think I'm good enough to have a Padawan. I feel as if I'm still a Padawan, myself."
Astrid turned her face up to look at him, and she told him quietly, "You're better than you think you are, Chosen One."
He chuckled at the word "Chosen One" but it sounded a little bitter. He sighed, his fingers stilling on her hair as he said, "I'm tired of people expecting so much from me. They all expect me to bring balance to the Force by defeating the Sith, as if my destiny is already preordained. But I want to chose my own destiny."
Astrid wasn't sure if she was included in those "people" he had mentioned. She hoped he didn't feel some sort of pressure from her to do well or act in a certain way.
Unsure of what to say in response, Astrid kept quiet, and his fingers resumed their rhythmic stroking through her hair. Astrid sighed contently. She wished she could stay like this forever.
"Do you know where you're headed next?" Astrid asked him, almost dreading his answer because then they would be separated again.
She felt him kiss her head as he murmured against her hair, "I'm supposed to go to some planet in the Outer Rim. Master Kenobi thinks Count Dooku might be there."
Astrid felt a flash of envy. He was so lucky. Here he was about to go after one of the two head leaders of the Separatist army, while she was to go back to Kuat, one of the Core System's terrestrial planets that served as the Republic's main battleship manufacturer.
The planet even had a manmade orbital ring around its equator that was composed of metal scaffold, bridged and augmented with enormous skeletons of ship and other machinery.
Although Kuat was important to protect, Astrid would much rather go after Count Dooku. She missed being a part of the Kenobi and Skywalker team. Or, Astrid supposed it was now the Kenobi, Skywalker, and Tano team.
"How about you?" he asked.
"Kuat," she replied shortly. "I had to leave the planet to go on a mission with Master Secura, but I have to go back. The 431st need me there."
"Your clone troopers?" Anakin questioned, and she nodded.
She twisted her body to face him and twined her arms around his neck as she murmured, "But I wish I could be with you."
He smiled softly. "And I wish I could be with you, too."
She wrinkled her nose and replied, "No you don't. You'll be chasing down Dooku. That is way more fun than being with me in Kuat."
Anakin shook his head insistently, and he wrapped his arms around her waist and tugged her closer to him. Her stomach fluttered. Anakin rested his forehead against hers as he whispered, "I would choose you over everything, Astrid. If you asked me right now to leave the Jedi Order, I would do it."
Astrid's lips curled into a grin as she said teasingly, "Leave the Order."
Anakin tossed his eyes playfully at her words, and he dipped his head down to kiss her. It was a sweet, gentle kiss, and Astrid's eyes fluttered closed as she pressed closer against him.
She knew Anakin was loyal to a fault, but... she didn't believe his words. He would never leave the Jedi Order. The Jedi Order was his life. Besides, why would he ever leave?
Suddenly, Anakin's commlink beeped, signaling someone-- most likely Master Kenobi-- was calling for him. They withdrew reluctantly, and Astrid asked, "Obi Wan?"
Anakin nodded as he glanced at his commlink on his wrist. "Most likely Ahsoka, too," he added. He looked back up at her as he offered, "Do you want to come with me? You can say hello to Obi Wan as an excuse for being there."
Astrid grinned and nodded. She sat up from the bed as Anakin did the same from beside her. Astrid checked to make sure her lightsaber was clipped on her belt before she followed Anakin out of the door.
The Coruscant sky was still an ashy grey, and she noticed that it had begun to drizzle outside. Astrid watched the orderly lines of aircraft in the sky as the two of them walked down the hallways of the Jedi Temple. With the start of the Clone Wars, some of the skylanes had been reserved for military personnel only. If a citizen was caught in those skylanes, they were heavily fined.
Not that those citizens couldn't afford it. It was likely that any aircraft flying in the sky was property of a citizen on the surface of Coruscant, meaning they were filthy rich. A hefty fine would be like dropping a penny in their pool of wealth.
Astrid and Anakin found Obi Wan and Ahsoka just outside the Jedi Council chambers, and Astrid smiled at the Jedi Master in greeting. "Hello, Master Kenobi," Astrid said warmly.
He smiled and waved a hand as he remarked, "I think you'll have to get used to calling me Obi Wan now, Astrid. You are a Jedi Knight."
Warmth pooled in Astrid's chest at his words, and her smile broadened. It was an honor to be able to call him by his first name, although she and Anakin had always referred to him as Obi Wan when they were talking about him with each other.
"Well, I am very glad to see you again, Obi Wan," Astrid replied, biting back her grin. She was sure she looked like a fool, she was smiling so widely.
As she studied Obi Wan, she noticed how tired he looked. There were slight circles under his eyes, and wrinkles lined the edges of his face. His usually bright, caramel eyes were dimmed and exhausted, and just like Anakin, his hair had grown a little longer.
Despite his fatigued look, Obi Wan smiled warmly at Astrid and said, "I suppose you've met Ahsoka already?" He indicated to the beaming Padawan beside him.
Astrid laughed and nodded. "I have met Ahsoka."
Ahsoka gave Astrid a crooked smile and dipped her head. She turned to Anakin and said, "Obi Wan was just telling me that we need to leave. Master Yoda gave us permission to follow after Count Dooku." She gave Astrid a curious look and asked, "Are you coming with us, Astrid?"
Astrid shook her head regretfully. "I have to get back to the 431st in Kuat." She forced a smile on her face as she added, "But maybe I will run into you three some other time." Her eyes slid towards Anakin, and she realized then that she didn't know exactly when she would see them again.
It could be months, years before they were united again. Astrid's throat began to burn as emotion swelled inside her like a tidal wave, tears beginning to prick at her eyes. She quickly blinked them away and tried unsuccessfully to push her sadness away.
These emotions were not the Jedi way.
Before her sorrow could overcome her, Astrid dipped her head and, without meeting their eyes, quickly said, "I must be on my way. I'm very glad I got to see you all today." She looked to Ahsoka as she added hurriedly, "And I am glad to have met you, as well."
She gave them one last smile before she turned on her heel and hurried down the hallway, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. She quickly wiped at her eyes, shoved her shoulders back, tilted her chin high, and picked up her pace.
It was only when Astrid turned the corner of the hallway, finally out of sight of the three Jedi, that she allowed her shoulders to slump down once more. And when she got back to her room, she threw herself onto her bed and buried her face in her pillow as she finally allowed herself to give in to the crushing sadness in her chest, crumbling as her tears fell.
Astrid was upset not only because she wouldn't see Anakin or even Obi Wan until who knew how long, but because she felt like she was losing her family, the only family she'd ever truly had, the only family she'd managed to find the whole nine years she'd been a part of the Jedi Order.
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Astrid was alone on her starship as she descended through Kuat's atmosphere. Her and Master Secura had separated once more, Astrid to Kuat and her former master to the planet, Quell. Astrid wondered absently how Anakin and Obi Wan always seemed to manage sticking together when assigned missions by the Jedi Council.
She supposed they were the Skywalker and Kenobi team. It would be wrong to separate the iconic duo.
When Astrid's starship emerged below the planet's cloud cover, the sight of endless, lush forest and rolling, grassy plains greeted her. Astrid guided her starship towards a large, open clearing in the middle of the forest near an aircraft manufacturing plant.
This was where she had stationed the 431st when she had to leave earlier.
Her starship lowered soundlessly onto the ground as armored clone troopers milled around the clearing, conducting their various assigned tasks. Several tents had been set up for the clones' sleeping quarters, but one tent was much larger than the rest, signaling it was the control center.
When Astrid walked out of her starship, she immediately headed towards the larger tent. Several clone troopers stopped walking as she cut through the encampment, her lightsaber hilt swaying at her hip, and a few of the clones smiled and greeted enthusiastically (and if she wasn't imagining it, with relief), "General Katarn."
She offered them smiles and nods. She finally arrived at the control center, and she moved the tent flap to the side with a hand as she stepped inside. The inside of the tent was much darker than outside, so it took a minute for Astrid's eyes to adjust.
But when they did, she found a table laden with a map of the Kuat's terrain and the surrounding planets occupying the middle of the tent. Surrounding the table was Kuat's leader, Onara Kuat, Captain Flynn of the 431st squadron, and the Jedi Padawan Astrid had left in charge, Brianne.
They all stopped talking and looked up at her entrance, and Captain Flynn was the first to greet her. He smiled broadly as he said, "General Katarn! I was wondering what was taking you so long to get back."
Astrid grinned as she looked at her faithful Captain. He had his white and blue helmet tucked under his arm. His face was that of the rest of the clone troopers; angular facial structure, olive skin, dark brown eyes, and black, cropped hair. But the one distinctive feature on Flynn was the scar that ran down his jaw.
The scar was small, so only those with strong observational skills would notice it. But it was just prominent enough that everyone knew who he was if they saw it on his face. And that was if they didn't see his distinguishable armor that marked him as Captain first.
Astrid stepped up to the table and placed her hands on it as she asked, "So, what's the latest update? Any Separatist action?"
Onara Kuat looked mildly annoyed as he replied dryly, "No, the Separatist haven't dared try to enter the planet yet, but I fear they will try soon. After all, if they are to capture Coruscant-- which they will at some point or another during this war-- they will have to silence Kuat first."
And that was because Kuat supplied the Republic with all sorts of valuable and much needed aircraft.
Astrid nodded as she examined the map of Kuat. "If they were to attack, where do you think they would land?"
Flynn pointed to the east side of the continent to which their base was located. The spot he indicated to was but fifteen miles from the capital of Kuat. "We were thinking this spot."
Astrid noticed Brianne beginning to withdraw from the table meekly, knowing that she wasn't needed now that the Jedi General was back, but Astrid said, "Brianne, your thoughts?"
Astrid looked towards the Padawan to catch the look of surprise that flashed across her face as she halted in place. Brianne quickly recovered, though, and she cleared her throat as she stepped back up to the table. She examined the map before saying, "I think they might also target the main manufacturing plants and shipyards, as well, not just the capital."
Astrid nodded in agreement. She had been thinking the same thing. She looked at Ontata and asked for diplomacy's sake, "Do you agree?"
The Kuat leader gave the map a cursory look before nodding once. "I want clone troopers dispatched at each manufacturing plant, ship yard, and around the capital," he told Astrid and Flynn, bypassing Brianne entirely.
Astrid exchanged a look with Flynn at the Kuat's arrogant tone. As if he was the one in charge of this whole operation, not Astrid. But Ontara had just ordered what Astrid was already going to do, so she had no choice but to nod, even as she seethed internally.
Astrid gave Flynn a wordless nod, and he nodded back before swiftly departing the tent. "Is that all, Mr. Ontara Kuat?" Astrid asked, unsure of his formal title.
He gave her a leveled look, his eyes seeming to penetrate through Astrid with their intensity, before he nodded. "That is all, General Katarn."
Before he could dismiss her, Astrid quickly responded, "Good. You are dismissed."
The skin between his eyebrows creased as he narrowed his eyes at Astrid, and a silent power struggle played out between them as he stared her down. Astrid held her ground, needing the Kuat leader to understand that she was in charge, even if she was young for a general.
Finally, Ontara looked away, and he inclined his head stiffly as he growled, "Good day, general," before stalking out of the tent.
Astrid sighed, realizing how tense her body had gotten during that mini meeting, and she allowed her shoulders to relax. There was movement to her left, and her eyes snapped up to find Brianne still standing there, nearly blending into the shadows by the walls of the tent.
She stepped forward, face solemn as she told Astrid, "I'm glad you stood up to him, General Katarn. Somebody had to do it." Astrid realized that was pride shining in the Padawan's eyes, and Astrid smiled.
Astrid rested a hand on the young girl's shoulder as she told her, "Don't ever let someone tell you that you are insignificant, or allow them to treat you as if you are worthless or not special enough, Brianne. You'll never survive in this world if you do."
The Padawan only smiled in response, and Astrid jerked her head to the tent's opening as she added, "You're free to go if you wish."
Brianne gave her a small smile and dipped her head respectfully before she left the tent. Light spilled inside the gloomy tent as the Padawan exited before the tent flap closed once again, swallowing Astrid into darkness as she stood alone in the room.
Always alone.
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