•Cassidy
Another gust of wind swept over me from the open window, letting me smell the familiar salty scent of the ocean. It was ridiculously hot outside tonight, which resulted in me sleeping on the couch in the living room instead of our bedroom which was sweltering and had a temperature that was equivalent to Hell.
Calum has barely been home the past few days due to tour rehearsals, which I completely understood, but it has left me staying up late every night just waiting to see him and spend some time together. I was disappointed that we've barely been together at all, and now we only had two days left before he went on tour and I was stuck here filming my movie.
The slamming of the front door caused me to jump in fright. I swiveled my head around, viewing Calum stomp through the kitchen and chuck his keys onto the counter, muttering words under his breath.
"Hey, you okay?" I called out cautiously, making him look up and make eye contact with me.
He walked over to the couch, slumping down into the sofa with an exasperated sigh escaping his mouth. "It's been a long day. I'm just really stressed out right now."
"Do you want to do something to get your mind off things?" I suggested, attempting to be both seductive and casual and just praying he got the hint.
Calum stared at me in complete disgust. "Are you kidding me? No, I don't. I'm not in the mood," He stated harshly, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth.
"I just thought we could because it's our second to last night together," I replied innocently, shrugging my shoulders. Calum didn't reply, instead he just took his phone out and replied to a new message. "Do you want to do something else? Like, watch a movie? Or we could go swim in the ocean for once?"
Calum sighed again, but it sounded more of an irritated growl. "No, I'm just going to go to bed. I'm so tired."
"I haven't seen you at all day, though," I said, trying to stay calm and give him his basic needs of life even though my heart was shattering from his lack of interest in me. He used to always come home from the studio with tons of stories to tell, but today it was completely different.
Calum stood up from the couch. "Get used to it," He mumbled, making a beeline for the bedroom.
My jaw dropped at his insensitive words. It was completely unlike Calum. And I did not like this side of him one bit.
I picked up a pillow and hugged it against my chest as if it would provide the comfort I wasn't even be able to receive from my own boyfriend. My boyfriend who I wouldn't be able to see for months and who didn't seem to care.
I pushed myself up off of the couch as the heat became unbearable, and headed towards the back porch to get a breath of fresh air. The air conditioning must be broken or something.
The waves were continuously crashing against the beach in a languid motion, soothing my brain of its swarming thoughts. I tried to focus on inspecting the way the water absorbed into the sand, making it a darker shade than the dry sand that was closer to the deck, and how it made the little shells appear to glimmer. I just wanted to concentrate on anything other than this current situation.
I walked closer towards the ocean, finally sitting down on the sand and stretching my legs out so my feet would reach the water. A wave crashed over my feet, which truly helped cool me down. However, mentally, I was still mad, and a tear slowly trickled down my face.
I wasn't sure if I was mad at Calum for his comment or if I was mad that I actually wouldn't be able to see his face everyday. I still have not come to terms with that. I don't want to think of how tortorus it's going to be only getting to hear his voice over phone calls and only seeing him through a screen. But I guess that was better nothing, and it's something we're just going to have to get through together.
Once the tide raised high enough to get my shins wet, I retreated away from the ocean and went back inside, trying to stop the silent tears from falling.
Calum was now sitting on the sofa again, this time shirtless and only clad in his patterned boxers. He glimpsed up at me as he lifted the back of his palm to his forehead, wiping off some sweat. "It's hot as balls in there."
"I know," I stated in an icy tone, giving off a little sniffle.
Calum patted the spot next to him and I reluctantly obliged to his request. "Have you been crying?" He interrogated, his eyebrows raised as he scanned my face.
I just nodded. Calum wrapped his arms around me, even though it was ridiculously hot in our house, and held me close to his body, rubbing his palms on my back in a circular motion. "I'm sorry, baby. I've just been really stressed about the tour lately."
"Well I'm stressed too! I have a new movie to shoot and I have to figure out how I'm going to stay sane while you're gone," I explained, tilting my head back so I could see his face. I ran a hand through his hair that was a bit greasy due to the sweat. "Just try not to take the stress out on me, okay? I really don't want to be mad at you when you're away. I love you, Calum."
His eyes flickered around my face, his lips remaining tightly pursed together as if he was thinking about something very deeply. He swallowed slowly, making his Adam's apple bob up and down. "I love you too, Cassidy. I always will. Remember that," Calum mumbled, his voice sounding strained.
I smiled, closing the gap between us by pressing our lips together in a chaste kiss. "Do you want to sleep on the floor tonight?"
"Yeah," He agreed. "But can we take a shower together first? I smell disgusting."
"I thought you weren't in the mood," I teased, standing up from the couch with our hands laced together, as we approached the bathroom.
"I guess I lied," Calum said, finally breaking a grin as he turned on the water.
•*•*•
Bree finished eating her last slice of pizza before wiping her mouth from a napkin to get rid of the excess grease that was lingering around the crevice of her lips. She let out a loud burp immediately afterwards, making me laugh at her lack of inhibition.
"This was fun, but I should probably get going. Michael's coming over after rehearsals because we apparently need to talk," Bree told me, rolling her eyes slightly.
"Oooh," I said playfully as I folded up the empty cardboard pizza box and brought it over towards the recycling bin.
She shrugged. "It's whatever. I'll see you at the airport tomorrow, right?"
"I'll be there," I said with a nod, just as Calum came through the front door, an exhausted expression covering his face again. He gave a small smile to Bree before ducking into the bedroom, not even muttering a word. She looked at me questioningly. "I don't know. I'll see you later, okay?"
She sauntered off towards the front door to exit, leaving me alone in the living room. It was late, nearly midnight, and I was thankful that Bree had came over to keep me company today instead of just me sulking around waiting for Calum like a hopeless housewife.
"Hey, Cal," I called as I opened up the door to our room. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring down at his own hands as if a layer of blood covered his palms. "What's wrong, babe? Long day of rehearsals?"
"Cass," Calum responded suddenly, his brown eyes lifting to meet my own. "I think we need to break up."
My heart stopped. Every ounce of color in my face diminished, leaving me pale and wide-eyed, with my breath getting caught in my throat.
"We- what?" I clarified through my quivering lips. I was hoping I had just misheard him.
Calum shrugged. "Come on, Cass. I'm going on tour and you'll be filming a new movie. We're never going to be able to talk or see each other. Let's just end things on good terms, and then when I get back from tour in like March we can see from there."
The room felt like it was spinning. I couldn't breathe properly. Tears welled up in my eyes before falling over the brim, constantly streaming over my face. This could not be happening.
"March? Are you kidding me? I'm not going to be able to talk you to until March? Please tell me this is a joke, Calum," I wailed, in the midst of my heavy cries.
He frowned at me, his hands reaching out to touch my shoulders. "No, baby. You can still talk to me whenever. We can still be friends, okay? I just don't think a relationship is the best thing for our careers right now."
"Bullshit," I spat angrily, with tears continuing to flow down my cheeks. "We love each other. We can make it work. I love you, Calum. I love you. You can't just dump me. Please don't do this."
Calum swallowed, his eyebrows furring together. "Cass," He trembled, his voice coming out in a whisper. "Don't make this harder than it needs to be. We're just going to take a break for a little bit."
"A little bit? It's almost a year! How am I supposed to be without my best friend for that long? Why aren't you even going to try?" I screamed, although it didn't sound as intimidating when I was sobbing.
He shuffled his feet. "Look, I've never had a girlfriend on tour before. The guys keep telling me how hard it is and how you just end up hating each other. I don't want to hate you. And I'm not sure if I'm even able to handle this kind of commitment."
My jaw dropped.
"Commitment?" I repeated in an incredulous tone. "Are you kidding me? Commitment? So you're breaking up with just because you don't think you're going to be able to keep your dick in your pants?"
He clenched his jaw together tightly as he shifted his gaze towards the carpet underneath us. "Well, not exactly-"
I threw my hands up in the air, stomping away from him. "You know what? Fine! If this summer meant absolutely nothing to you and all you care about is getting laid then be my guest. Go get laid, Calum! Have fun! Just don't come crying to me when you realize none of those girls give a single solitary shit about you!" I screeched in an irrational manner. "God dammit, I'm such an idiot."
He was following closely behind me as I sat on the couch, picking up that same throw pillow and holding it tightly to my chest. The uncontrollable sobs hit me again, and I started to rock back and forth.
"I thought I was just going to have to miss see you everyday. Now I'm going to have to miss our whole relationship," I cried, lifting my hand up to my mouth in awe as my voice cracked with every word I spoke.
Calum awkwardly sat down on the other cushion, his elbows on his knees as his head hung low to stare at his feet. "I'm sorry, Cass. I just thought this would be better for us in the long run."
I let out another wail, feeling my fingers start to shake as they held tightly onto the scratchy material of the pillow. "But you're my breaking my heart."
"Baby," He whimpered, scooting closer to me and extending his arms out to try and hold me, but I stood up and withered away from his touch. I wanted him to hold me more than anything, but I was so furious that he was ending things for such stupid reasons.
"I didn't want to lose you again, Calum," I mumbled, lifting my palm up to my eyes and rapidly wiping the waterfall of tears. "But that's exactly what's going to happen. Isn't it?"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
author's note: well you all probably hate me now
i actually cried while writing this just from like imagining cassidy crying and calum just sitting there ugh i am so emotionally invested in my own story this is bad
i like writing about breakups tho like ive had a plan that they were going to break up since i started writing this story idk like we gotta be realistic but at the same time calum is being super dumb too but either way its a learning experience for both of them
love you guys so much please dont hate me instead just tweet me your feelings (@calumfridge) and we can be emo together ight
thnk you for reading this even tho you might not be happy with the outcome of this chapter ps my updates might be a lil slow for a bit bc im seeing nick jonas tmorrow night and then the holidays are coming up so please be patient & have a happy holiday !!!
dedicated to lydiasummmer for not only commenting howshe likes my stories because they are different but because i am so close with my readers and v active with you guys and thats honestly the best part getting your feedback i love that were all one big happy family love u guys soooo much & thank you for bein so sweet lydia !!