Hey loveliess..REALLY SORRY FOR THE LATE UPLOAD..been kinda busy..But I'll work harder! :3
Chapter Ten
Chace Phillips
I was running in the woods again.
It was really early in the morning of a Sunday, and I just can't help it.
Suddenly, sitting in my room felt suffocating. I just wanted out.
I wanted to inhale the sweet smell of fresh air. I just wanted to run free from all the weight that's slumped on my shoulders right now. I just wanted to feel sane again.
I didn't mind talking to Troy either; he'd been avoiding me these two weeks. Well, that was mainly my fault when I ran away from our soulmates.
But deep down, I felt that I was doing the right thing.
'It's your idiot side thinking to me…' Troy suddenly spoke in our mind link. I broke into a wide grin.
Finally! Some interaction from him!
'You miss me don't you?' I grinned internally. I could feel him rolling his eyes, and stopped talking.
I stopped running, and caught my breath. Talking to Troy for that brief moment lost my focus in running. I scanned my surrounding and made sure that it was clear.
Satisfied, I started to relax and eased my sore muscles.
Honestly, I had been thinking about my soulmate. Her long, wavy brown hair that danced in the wind. Her tanned skin that reflected light, giving it a distinct glow, her soft, full lips that shades a pink colour, making me want to have a taste of it. And her eyes, her big green eyes that twinkle like the stars above. She was perfect...
She was my soulmate; she was supposed to be perfect, to me.
I sat on a big rock, in the middle of the woods. It was a spot that I used to go when I just needed to chill.
With a deep breath and concentration, I formed a perfect water sphere surrounding me. The flowing sound of the water created a calm atmosphere and I was drowned in my own little world. I just let all my emotions flow out.
I just needed to get my conscious straight. I needed to plan first then execute. I need to make things right and arrange my priorities...I took a another deep breath and...
"Hey coward. Mom wants to see you…" a voice suddenly spoke up from outside my water sphere. It was Troy.
I smiled and dropped the sphere slowly. I opened my eyes and saw him with a smug face in the trees. I smiled, but he turned around and started walking. His fur was a deep red, but alternating with black.
That's it. It's time to end all these nonsense.
"Troy, we need to talk…" I commanded at him with my authority voice.
He froze in his tracks and turned around. He snarled and showed his fangs at me. His changing fur was now stopped at a scarlet red, and he was fuming, I can tell.
"Don't you dare behave like this towards me..." I warned and stepped closer. His tail was raised higher than before, and his red fur really bright in the sunlight.
"I won't listen to you...until I got to see my soulmate. You betrayed them, and I will not listen to a traitor like you..." He hissed.
I was caught by surprise by his sudden words.
The once caring and loving spectra that I know, was now against me. I felt like someone stabbed my heart, over and over again. We had a strong bond, we should feel like this, but obviously, he was not.
With no more words, he disappeared into the trees. I didn’t dare to try and pursue him. Instead, I just stared out to the direction that he went.
I could sense his frustration was burying deep right now. To that, I sighed.
With a very heavy heart, I dragged myself home.
It was a long walk home, so I fasten my pace. Suddenly, I heard a very loud rustling happening in the trees. I stopped dead in my tracks and scanned my surroundings. I squinted my enhanced hearing and sight to try and get what was making that loud noise.
Then it hit me. That strawberry scent with a hint of rain. It was so intoxicating, it was...
It was my soulmate's scent.
I smelled it again, just making sure I was not imagining things. It was still there. My senses went on frantic mode and I followed the smell. I kept running in circles, but ended up in the same spot. I lingered for a little while more, inhaling and savouring that tingling feeling in me.
Then I decided that, my brain was making fun of me or something. I headed home once more, gradually looking back, making sure if I ever missed anything.
Even then, I still smelled it. I shook my head a few times, trying to get my twisted head straight again.
When I arrived at the backyard, I saw my mom sitting at the porch, with two cups of tea.
She smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. I smiled back and told her that I wanted to go change, but she just motioned to the seat beside her. I sat and she handed me the other cup.
I sipped from my cup and we stayed there in silence for a few minutes until,
"I heard you found your soulmate..." She started. My body stiffened. I could feel mom looking my way, but I just looked up straight ahead. She cleared her throat, trying to get my attention.
I cast my cup on the table and looked at Mom, "How did you know?" I asked curiously. It couldn’t be Troy…
"Anna told me...And she's pretty upset. What happened?" She widened her eyes with worry and held my cheek.
She was staring into my eyes, trying to search for an answer, so I decided to give her the honest one.
With a deep breath and a long sigh, I spoke,
"Yes, mom. But I don't think she deserves me. I mean, look at what I've done. I killed my own father and..." I diverted from the main point and felt frustration building up inside me.
The past memory was clouding my mind again…
"Do not blame it on yourself Chace. You know it was Caine who threw the katana..." Mom tried reasoning with me.
I shook my head persistently, "It was my katana, mom. If I didn't make that stupid move, none of this would happen. Dad and Titan would still be alive, and you and Anna would never be sad, and everything would be normal again. I missed those times mom. I missed his teachings. I need them. Now that I've become the Chief, I really, really need his words of advice. It's been two weeks, and all the sound that rung in my ears is the sound of the katana tearing through dad's flesh and all I smell was, the rusty smell of dad's blood when I held him in my arms for the last time..." I poured it all out to Mom.
My body was shaking like crazy with grief and sadness. I was never one to portray my tears, but in front of my mom, my only strength right now, I just let them slide down my cheeks. I felt weak, I felt vulnerable.
Seeing my condition, the mouth gaping mom moments ago held me so close in her arms. She patted my back and tried soothing me. I felt like a little boy right now. I held her back like my life depended on it.
"Oh Chace, this two weeks, I did want to talk about this. But I was afraid that, by reminding you, you would never let go and put the burden on your shoulders. I didn't know..." she meekly whispered while holding me tighter.
I didn't respond. Just letting go right now was good enough for me.
"But, I want you to hear me clearly young man..." She lets go of me and gripped my shoulder tightly, staring intently in my eyes, searching for something, but I didn’t know what.
"You must not ever blame yourself for dad's death. To tell you the truth, me and Anna cannot accept the fact that our soulmates are gone. Hell, we've been talking and talking about it, about the past, about what if's. But we realized that, it won't do us good. That's why we chose to move on. We still have wonderful children, and that you guys are the ones that will be our strength for now on. Your father and Titan would want us to do the same. They, would want you, and Troy the same too…" she clarified to me.
It took me one minute to process all of mom's words.
She was right. I must move on, and must be stronger. But, it was hard. I want so badly for everybody to understand that…
Before I could respond, mom spoke again,
"Now, about your soulmate. Why did you leave her? What's she like?" She grinned happily while shooting those continuous questions at me...
That made my mind wandered towards the beauty of my soulmate again.
I smiled, but only looked down. I need to explain to mom about what happened two weeks ago.
"Mom, actually, I...We, found them two weeks ago, at the funeral..." I started to explain.
Mom’s brows furrowed up in confusion and shock, "Really? You didn't tell me, who is she?"
"Well, I..." I stuttered but I couldn’t make my mouth finished the next sentenced.
"He was being an idiot and ran away..." Troy suddenly came from the trees, looking angry.
His fur was changing once more. Mom's brows scrunched in confusion and I looked at Troy. I opened our link and let the words float in our minds, not caring if it penetrated through his mind barrier or not,
'I told you to give me some time, Troy. You promised not to tell anyone until I properly...'
'I can't wait anymore Chace. Do you know what I feel when you ran? Do you know what I feel when I connected with her, but you ripped it away just like that? Don't you feel it Chace?! Coz' I damn did feel it...’ he spat. I winced but didn’t make it visible to anyone…
But I didn’t want to lose this fight now. I tried to get back at him 'I...'
"Okay, stop the mind linking and talk to me. Both of you...Hey!" Mom snapped us from the link, making us both look at her for a brief moment, before glaring at each other again.
Troy still narrowed his eyes and sat beside my mother. I just bored into his eyes, trying to read him. I just don't want us to fight anymore like this. And I knew that he doesn’t want to either.
"Now, talk..." Mom commanded at us. I wanted to start, but Troy beat me to it.
"Chace ran away from our soulmate because he thinks that he's not good enough..." Troy started off. His fur was a dark green now and changed to indigo.
"Yes, I do think like that, Troy. But you know why! I need to straighten things up with the pack first..." I defended myself while raising up my voice a few notches.
Troy snorted and didn’t felt afraid at all at my sudden change, "That's ridiculous. You know damn well that our soulmates need us! Don't you remember they cried...because of us?!" he yelled at me.
I stood up and gave him my stern face, "Enough!" I shouted, using my authority voice, Hell, I don't even know I have that.
These two weeks, I was under the guidance of my second in command, Anthony which is also one of the elders who's been my father's best wing man for years. He helped me out a lot with pack stuff, and I can't thank him more...
Troy instantly stopped talking and mom gasped at both of our outburst. Anna suddenly came running outside with Mia on her side, staring at us.
"What's happening here? Troy? Are you okay?" Mia strode closer to Troy and nudged his front leg. Troy looked down on Mia for a second and turned his gaze to me once more. Harder this time.
Alexis came soon after while rubbing the sleepiness away from her eyes and studied us for a brief moment before speaking in her sleepy voice...
"What's wrong mommy? Why is everybody staring at each other?" She lifted Mia into her arms and patted her head. Mia turned a soft blue and snuggled in her arms.
I felt a pang of jealousy at their intimacy.
I grunted and left the backyard. I grabbed my sweater and took my car keys. I need to get out of this mess for a while. I need, to get out from here.
If everyone is against me, then I need to be somewhere else until they cool off. I hurriedly sped off from the house and hit the streets, unknown of where I am to go. I didn’t bother opening the radio, so I drove in silence.
I ended up staring at the morning sky, that was now fully glowing it’s glorious light. I drove slowly, while enjoying the beautiful view. I sighed when I remembered what happened at my house a while back.
I just can't take it when Troy reminded me of our soulmate's tears. I just can't...I can't be the one causing all the pain to her. I must be their strength. It was my entire fucking fault.
All the words that mom seeped into me this morning, slowly dissolved away, making me feel burdened again.
I could feel Troy trying to knock into the mind link. But I put a very firm barrier to keep him out of there for a while. If he thinks he can ignore me, then I can do better.
I kept driving in circles and got out from the pack lands...
Not long after, the weak tears came again...
At these times, talking to my Dad was the best thing to do. He was always giving me the right answers and instantly made me calm again.
I really missed him. I parked at the side of the road and killed the engine. I went out and sat on the grass, not caring if people were staring at me. I was at the edge of the pack lands, so there were no one present here at this time.
I looked up at the sky and spoke with a sorrowed voice, trying to talk to Dad, “Dad, I don’t know where you are right now, but I just hoped you can hear me…” I started and let a tear slid off my cheek.
“…I’m lost now, Dad. I don’t know what to do…I don’t know who to talk to. Troy hates me. Mom doesn’t have a clue. And I don’t want Alexis to be burdened with my problems…” I whispered slowly.
“…Why did you leave so soon Dad? I’m still not ready to carry this responsibility. I’m afraid if I do it wrong. I just can’t bear it if I ever lost someone ever again…”
“…That’s why I ran away. I didn’t want to risk my soulmate’s happiness and make her feel what I feel. I wanted to make them happy, not be sad along with me. I sounded stupid, what am I even saying!” I shouted at the woods.
I wiped the treacherous tears and felt my anger boiling up. Why didn’t you answer me, dad? But I can’t be angry with him. I was the one who caused his death.
Instead, “I’m sorry Dad. I disappointed you…” I whispered in the wind, hoping that it would deliver my message with him. I just wanted Dad to know that.
I wanted him to forgive me. But I wouldn’t know that now, would I?
I propped my knees up on my chest and buried my face in shame. How can I still have guts to talk to him after what I put him through?
Suddenly, the wind blew harshly past me, made me shot my head up. Then, it calmed down again into a soft breeze. I closed my eyes, while enjoyed the morning air swishing my hair, rocking my body from side to side.
‘I forgive you, son…’ My eyes fluttered open and looked around. Who said that?
I stayed quiet and focused my hearing. I closed my eyes and put all of my focus to my hearing…
Then I made out numerous sentence, all of them whispered by the same voice, fathers. It was Dad, trying to communicate with me.
‘I forgive you son…don’t ever give up…they trust you…follow your heart…” was what I heard, and I registered everything in my mind, calming it at the process.
But the most distinct one, and the clearest, was, ‘I love you always, son…’
I smiled, “Thanks Dad, I love you too…” I whispered back, and I was sure that he heard it.
I stood up and made it to my car. It took some time to snap out from the previous trance, and I found it hard to believe it for some time. I can’t believe communicated with my Dad. I should do that more often…
I kick start the engine, feeling less burdened and more confident with myself. I told you dad had that magic on me. I continued on my way, crossing the pack borders.
I was still juggling my options to go and meet them right now, or giving it more time. I just don't know. I need to talk to someone at least and made known to them about my mistake.
I need to talk to her father, Chief Richards and hoped that I'm forgiven.
I can't take this anymore.
I needed to tell the truth.
I needed my spectra to be on my side again.
Most importantly, I needed my soulmate.
Hey loveliess..Sorry if this chapter is kind of slow. Chace needed to realize what he's missing...Till' then loveliess :)