Spring
I think spring has arrived.
It's been a long time since I experienced it.
It symbolizes love, the arrival of a person whom you admire from your heart.
I thought I will never experience it again, especially to another person.
So, is it fine?
Is it fine if I love again?
But what will I do if I wake up? Will he still be with me when I wake up?
Will he stay by my side?
...
I woke up at 6 in the morning and cooked some simple rice porridge. Scooping some portion from the pan, I took my thermos and put the porridge inside so it'll stay warm.
"Callia? You're already leaving?" My mom must have smelled the porridge.
Looking at my phone, it's already 7 and I'm afraid there would be some traffic so I woke up early.
"I'm going to visit Yuu"
"Tell him that me and your Pa will visit him tomorrow, I just have something to do today" I nodded and closed the door before calling a cab.
Soon, I saw myself looking at the hospital. My feet seems to be stuck, it's been a really long time since I went to the hospital.
I remembered the time I went here was when father had an accident.
It was also here where he was operated.
Suddenly, I feel a bit suffocated, memories of my father in the ambulance with his legs in an awkward angle made my stomach churn.
Wails of my mother can be heard from the background as she slapped my face. I tasted blood back then but I was immobile.
I felt cold and all I wanted to do was to turn back time.
To turn the time where I foolishly waited for him.
To turn back time where I- stop.
Yuu needs me, I can't let my fear run over me. I need to be strong, after all, I have to go inside and tell him.
Tell him my true thoughts.
...
"Callia, you're here"
"Auntie, Uncle, how are you?" I greeted them back which they returned a smile.
I placed the thermos on the table and looked at Yuu. Yuu's parents left after a moment and silence commenced.
I was a bit conscious, a little nervous too. I was fidgeting in my seat as I wait for him to open his eyes.
His head was wrapped in bandages and some scratches was seen on his face. The warm sunlight peeked through the windows and bathed his face with it.
It feels like he was an illusion, that he's out of this world. The longer he was bathed in the sun's ray, the faster my heart beats.
I felt like he was a dream.
A dream that is too good to be real.
A dream that is so far fetched from reality.
A dream that will vanish in a blink of an eye.
Suddenly, his eyes opened and before I knew it, I was holding his hand so tight I could see his brows furrowing.
"C-callia?"
"Yuu I- ugh...I thought you'll leave"
Tears dropped on my eyes and fell from his palm. I couldn't stop my tears, it felt like I was the one who was hurt, who was hospitalized than him.
I don't know what I was feeling, whether it was relief or pain.
All I know is that he's back.
Yuu's back.
And I'm never gonna let go of this hand again.
***
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