"What's the matter, Colby? Are you feeling okay?" Asked Sophie.
It was good to see her. Sophie always had a way of making time slow down for a second, the world seem a little less big. The things that weighed heavily upon Colby's shoulders didn't feel so pressing when Sophie was around. Perhaps it was due to the fact that they had known each other since they were both in diapers, but, in Colby's eyes, she brought a reliable source of comfort with her.
"Why are you here?" He asked.
"The nurse is off sick today, so the school asked me to cover for her since I'm first aid trained. It's not so bad. I'm getting extra credit for it."
"How much more extra credit do you need? You're in every club I can think of."
She fluffed up some pillows for him and brought over a small cup of water. "My dad says it's good to stay busy."
"Don't push yourself too much." He sat on the bed letting his body relax for the first time today. The bed was covered in thick fluffy blankets. No one knew how often they were cleaned —some said they weren't— but right now he couldn't care less. "I feel so hot."
"You feel hot after spending time with Ezra? Okay." She giggled to herself as she perched on the edge of the bed. Gently, she rested the back of her hand on Colby's forehead.
"What do you mean? He's a dick."
"He brought you all the way here and you still think that? Maybe you should give him the benefit of the doubt on this one."
"What the fuck are you on? Since when did you get a crush on Ezra."
"Crush!" Her cheeks were burning red. She kept twisting a strand of her hair around her finger. "I mean, it's not that I like him- or maybe I do- I don't really know."
"Well, do you like him or not?" Please say not.
"I don't know. Genuinely, I don't know, it's confusing. We talk to each sometimes, in a civil and polite way, not... romantically. Or at least I didn't think it was romantic." She turned away from Colby. "My friends think I flirt with him."
"Which friends?"
"You know, Netra, Megan, Trisha... Joanna."
"Joanna! Joanna thinks you're flirting with him too? Well, she'd know plenty about that, wouldn't she."
Sophie didn't reply.
"Do you like him?"
"My friends say I do. I don't know. I've never really had a crush on a guy before. I don't know what's it's supposed to feel like. I'm sorry, Colby. I don't think I am flirting with him."
It didn't make sense. It was against all that was holy and right in this world. Sophie was so nice and sweet and good and Ezra was everything but. Ezra was so Ezra, and that wasn't a good thing. Just the idea of it made Colby's stomach knot.
He could picture it. The two of them walking down the hall together holding hands. Sophie would be blushing like she is now and Ezra would smile at her lovingly. They would go on cute dates and Ezra would buy her gifts. They would have sex and Ezra would be gentle and nice to her. He would love her.
The pain was indescribable but he could feel it everywhere in his body. The room began to swim and he thought he was going to be sick.
He hadn't felt this way since the Joanna incident.
"Have you told him how you feel yet?" He managed to ask.
"No, not yet. Do you remember the party from Sunday?"
"Parts of it."
"Well, I think he likes someone else and I think they were at this party."
Good. She hadn't told him yet. So why didn't he feel good about it. If anything he felt even worse than before. A million question rammed him at once. Was this the 'good time' Ezra had mentioned earlier? Who was 'someone else'? How would Ezra react if Sophie asked him out? But the question that bothered him the most was, why did he even care so much? His stomach was doing a full-on acrobatics performance inside him at this point.
"What do you mean 'I think', don't you know what actually happened at the party?"
"Uh no. I kinda heard about it from someone else.
"Who?"
"It doesn't really matter, they might be lying."
"Who?"
"Or they could've misheard from someone else."
"Sophie, who."
"I heard it from Joanna."
First Ezra likes 'someone else'. Then Sophie has a crush on Ezra. Now Joanna has information on Ezra. The building pressure became too much. He threw up.
*
After what happened in the Nurse's office, Colby was forbidden from going to class for the rest of the day. His mom wasn't home to look after him since she was doing a shift at the local hotel she managed, so he had to sit in his dad's office for most the day, nothing to entertain him but the spiny chair. All day just spin, spin, spin.
He threw up in his dad's office.
When Colby wasn't wrecking his dad's office and filling it with the putrid smell of vomit that his dad would probably never get out, he thought about everything Sophie had said. He couldn't say why it bothered him so much. It was probably just because he'd known Sophie since kindergarten and she deserved better than that douchebag. Yeah, that was it. The strange thing was he was actually debating whether to go talk to Joanna about what she knew. He hadn't talked to her since the incident.
Then there was the issue of Ezra. Could he really continue with Operation Revenge if Sophie liked him? He wanted to. He really wanted to. So he could get his revenge... obviously. But he would feel guilty about it now, knowing how she felt about him. Maybe he did need to let go of the past already. But not right now.
He decided to try and find Joanna. His dad had a packet of extra minty chewing gum stuffed away in his desk, Colby used and chewed the entire packet. He didn't want to imagine how embarrassing it would be to see his ex again after so long and stink of puke. The lunch bell had just rang so he had a good chance of finding her in the cafeteria.
The closer he got to the cafeteria, the more nervous he got. It had been so long since they had talked. He wasn't really sure what to say or how to act. They did not end their relationship on good terms, not even close.
He'd tried desperately to get over her and that happened to involve cutting her out of his life. Unfortunately, he couldn't have done the same with Ezra since they were on the football team together but Joanna's life never seemed to cross with Colby's. A part of him was glad of that. That's why it was so strange that he was the one forcing them back together again. And for what; for himself; for Sophie; for Ezra? He didn't really know.
At the far end of the dining hall, sat Joanna. She looked as lovely as ever with her strawberry blonde hair and lightly freckled face. She sat at a round table with a few girls and guys, he recognised some of the guys from football, one of them was Brent.
But if Brent was there, then where was Ez-
"What are you staring at?" Speak of the devil and he shall appear. Colby's skeleton nearly jumped out his skin. For such a big guy, Ezra could sneak up on people pretty easily.
"Um, I need to talk to.... someone." It was odd but he didn't want to tell Ezra why he was here. "Not like it's any of your business, dick." Ezra just grinned at him.
"I heard you threw up all over the Nurse's office, gave it a nice new paint job. Did the kiss I gave you make you all nervous?"
"Fuck off. I did throw up and it's because of how disgusting it was to be touched by you." That came out a little harsher than Colby had meant it to. Ezra's face became cold and unreadable, he didn't even make a snippy reply or anything.
"Are you feeling better now?" He said it so quietly that Colby nearly didn't hear him.
"Huh? Oh, yeah. Thanks- thanks for taking care of me earlier, I guess."
Ezra leaned closely towards Colby's face. There faces were so close that their lips were nearly touching. He could feel the heat of his breath against Colby's lips. Was he going to kiss him? Right now? In front of everyone? Colby didn't pull away or push against Ezra, he just closed his eyes and waited.
But nothing happened . Or at least he didn't feel anything happen. When he opened his eyes again, Ezra was standing further back smirking again.
"You still owe me a meet up, you know? Since you bailed on it this morning."
"I don't owe you anything!"
"Next time I ask you better not flake out, alright?" Before Colby could insult him, he reminded Colby of why he was actually here. "Didn't you want to talk to someone?"
"Oh yeah!"
Filled with fresh annoyance from talking to Ezra, he marched over to Joanna's table without preparing something to say first. Big mistake. He just stood there silently until he could string a sentence together in his head.
"Uhh... can I talk to you... in private... please..."
She looked just as shocked to see him as he had been to talk to her.
"Sure Colbs. It's been a while."
"You wanted to talk to Joanna?" Ezra was going to be the death of Colby if he kept sneaking up on him like that. "Why?" He looked and sounded pissed. More than pissed.
Before Colby could think of an explanation, Joanna stood up and wrapped herself around Colby's arm. With a sly smirk on her face she said to Ezra, "Whatever it is, it has nothing to do with you. Colby and I have a lot of history, you know. We are allowed to talk about it." That only seemed to piss Ezra of more. "Come on, Colbs. Let's go somewhere more private."
Colby could only helplessly glance at Ezra and Joanna as she dragged him away. He wondered whether he'd accidentally started a fight. He'd only wanted to ask about the party, not start a fight.
They eventually settled on talking in an empty science room. Although, the life sized skeleton in the back of the room was creeping him out a little bit.
"It has legit been a long time, Colbs. How have you been?"
"Huh? Oh yeah, pretty good. Still on the football team and all that. I wanted to ask you about the party on Sunday."
She leaned back against the teacher's desk. The mom jeans she was wearing hugged her body in all the right places and the white shirt she was wearing complimented her bright hair colour.
She looked uneasy at his mentioning of the party.
"Sure. What do you want to know?"
"Well, someone told me, that you told them, that Ezra liked someone a lot at that party. I was wondering who it is." He couldn't stand the sound of his own voice right now. He felt like a drama queen making such a big deal out of this but he wanted to know. He needed to know.
"Who told you I said that?"
"I can't say." Colby wasn't often involved in drama but he knew that you never rat out the name of your source of information.
"So you want me to tell you who Ezra likes but you won't tell me who told you something I apparently said? No fucking deal, Colbs."
"But I need to know."
"Why do you need to know?"
"I can't really tell you that either."
"So you want something for nothing. Well I've got things I need to keep private too, you know. Like the identity of the girl that Ezra likes."
"It's a girl?"
She paused and then smiled innocently at Colby. "Of course, it is. Why? You didn't think it could be a boy, did you?" She giggled.
Colby began to get that sick feeling from earlier but so much worse this time. "No of course I didn't. Who is she then?"
"Not telling. If this is all you want then I've still gotta finish my lunch." She waved and left him there by himself. The door slamming behind her.
"Wait! Just one last thing. Why did you cheat on me?"
"This isn't me trying to be mean but you just became, I don't know, too clingy." They stood there in an awkward silence for a while. That seemed to be Colby's entire day, awkward silences.
"Well, catch you around, Colbs."
It hurt so much. He couldn't pinpoint where it hurt or what was hurting him but it hurt. A lot.