TW// talk of dr*gs, depression, and crappy relationships towards the end
----
Hyunjae picked at her food, head still throbbing from her decisions last night.
Kunhang watched her confused.
"Are you okay?" He asked her seriously.
They were alone at one of the cafe's on campus.
"I'm good. I'm not even hammered. I'm just a mess," She said with a laugh, "A big mess."
Kunhang stirred his drink, "Details. I need details."
"I confessed to the boy I liked drunkenly. Again!"
He almost spit out his drink, "Wait Yuta? Or Taeyong again?"
"Yuta."
"So he said no?" He said sadly getting ready to give her a long speech about why men ain't shit.
Hyunjae turned red as her face got warm, "Oh no, he said yeah."
"What?!"
Kunhang's shout drew lots of attention from the students around them as well as the workers. They looked at them confused some even in disgust, but they should be the ones minding their business too.
"Keep it down, I don't wanna get kicked out I actually like to eat here," She said shushing him.
"So then why are you so upset?" He asked leaning closer.
She used her hand to shove his face away from her. Typical Kunhang behavior.
"Jesus give me some space. Because I don't want to ruin it. My past relationships have been nothing but shit. How do I know I won't mess this one up?"
Kunhang sighed taking a long sip from his drink.
"Hyunjae your past relationships being shit had nothing to do with you. Your choice in boys were the reason they failed. You can't blame yourself, you were in a shitty place you know," he spoke softly trying to get his point across to her. "It wasn't your fault they were asshats."
She pouted, "I know but it was partially my fault too. I feel like I ruin people you know."
"Please, it looks like Yuta already drink and smokes. You can't really mess him up anymore," he chuckled slightly.
"Don't doubt me," she chuckled, "Anyway we're just testing the waters or whatever. But wow I really didn't think he'd say yes."
He looked at her dumbfounded, "Dude Sicheng and I caught on real quick. Trust me it doesn't take a genius to see it."
She blushed as he mentioned it, she put her head down groaning, "shut it. Anyway I think we're gonna hang out today."
"Hang out?" He asked making air quotes.
She shoved him playfully with a laugh, "Yes, hang out. You nasty."
"Please he looks like the leader of a rock band, you'd be stupid not to smash."
"Again just testing the waters!"
"Just a suggestion," He shrugged, "But you do you. Or do Yuta. Get it?"
"God that was so lame."
——
Utah
Sooo
Do you have paint
Or do we have to buy more?
Jae z
Oh yeah we're gonna paint huh
I'm running low on paints :/
We might need to stop by the store
Wanna go??
Utah
YES
I love the paint store
Jae z
Wow you love paint more than I do
That's cute 😔
Ok I'm omw to your dorm
Utah
Wait we're leaving now???
Jae z
I mean yeah unless you're busy 👉🏼👈🏼
Utah
I'm not busy
I'm just not ready
Jae z
It's like .... 4 pm
Utah
Your point ????
Jae z
Good point
I wanna nap
Utah
No wait
Let's go now and nap later
Jae z
🤨
Fine
Utah
<3
See you in twenty
Jae z
See ya 👉🏼👈🏼
Hyunjaes
Liked by loselose, notkunhang, and 973 others
Hyunjaes weird 🤨
View all comments
Notkunhang what are you gonna stuff in the Fanny pack??
Hyunjaes my paint brushes and my dignity
Loselose lemme guess, painting
Hyunjaes how'd you guess? 💀💀 read that in a sarcastic voice
Notkunhang somehow I don't believe you
Hyunjaes what's that supposed to mean 😔 I'm hated here!
Notkunhang whatever go buy your paint loser
Hyunjaes BITCH
Hyunjae waited for Yuta at their usual spot. It was the water fountain in the center of their school. For some reason it was always easy to meet there. She checked her phone to check the time when someone put their arm around her. She went into panic mode and almost elbowed the person but she looked up to see Yuta.
"Don't scare me!" She yelled playfully punching his side.
She looked up at him confused, " Did your hair fade out or did you dye it back to brown?"
"Ah so you noticed?" He asked as they began walking to the store.
"Well yeah. It's a whole new shade," she laughed.
"To answer your question yes I did dye it again. It was starting to fade anyway so I thought I'd change it up."
To be fair the brown hair suited Yuta perfectly. He looked even more boyfriend than usual. The brown hair, white shirt, jeans. He screamed perfect boyfriend, and honestly he probably is the perfect boyfriend.
"It looks pretty. I like it, but then again you look good in most hair colors," She spoke up.
"I'm touched, this is the first compliment you've given me since we started dating."
Her jaw dropped, "Why do you say it like that? We just started dating less than a day ago."
He laughed seeing her reaction. It was fun to him to see her flip out at the smallest things.
"I'm joking. It's just funny seeing you get worked up," He admitted.
She sighed, "Your true colors are showing nayuta."
He smiled, "See there's still so much you have to learn about me."
"Yeah Yeah, we can talk about you while painting," Hyunjae laughed.
"Or we can talk about you," He smiled brightly.
They arrived at the paint shop. Yuta grabbed a basket and he followed Hyunjae. She chuckled as she saw him with the basket cause they were only here for a few things. At least that was the plan in her head.
"Are you planning on buying a lot?" She asked him with a chuckle.
Yuta nodded, "Definitely, I plan on trying to paint at least once a week."
"Wow, that's more than me. I think you're gonna give me a run for my money," She said grabbing a few pretty blue paints, "Do you like this blue?" She asked holding it up.
Yuta smiled surprised that she was asking for his opinion, "You're asking me?"
"Duh. This is gonna be for you," She smiled, "So yay or nay?"
Yuta smiled grabbing some paints for himself, "Yay. What could you possibly be up to this time?"
Hyunjae smiled, "Just wait and see."
Yuta wanted to know what she was thinking. There was a lot of creativity that went on in that head of hers, so he was more than curious to see it.
"What about this shade of orange?" She asked.
"How bout I don't tell you. You decide," he said booping her nose.
She laughed, quickly turning away so he wouldn't see the blush forming on her cheeks. She hated to admit it but he's smooth and he most definitely makes her flustered.
"Fine fine," She agreed with him.
She figured it would be better to just surprise him in the end. She looked through some more colors and even some brushes. After finally finding everything she waited for Yuta to finish. To her surprise, he was taking his sweet time looking through everything.
"Do you need help?" She asked putting a hand on his shoulder.
"Kinda, I don't know what I wanna paint this time around," He said sadly.
"Maybe you're being overwhelmed with all the colors. Here let's go look at some of the paintings in the other room," She said taking his hand to lead him towards the other room.
The other room was filled with different paintings and art pieces by people. They just create them and bring them here. Some of them are even winning pieces from competitions. There was a lot to look at and that's usually where Hyunjae went when she needed her own inspiration.
"Ta-da," she said doing a jazz hand gesture.
Yuta laughed but as soon as he saw the art he was kind of blown away. There was so many different styles of art. He wasn't sure where to look. At least until he saw a pretty painting of a mountain.
It reminded him of home, the way the painting immediately felt serene. It was almost nostalgic.
"That one catch your attention?" She asked letting go off him.
"Definitely. I think I've been inspired," he smiled.
He loved how real it felt, he felt like if he took a deep breathe he'd get a whiff of clean air straight from the mountain. Pretty was an understatement.
"Good! Now go crazy," She chuckled encouraging him.
After a few more minutes searching for Yuta's paints. They headed over to his dorm to start painting. Hyunjae even took it upon herself to order some food and have it delivered.
"Ok I need your pants," Hyunjae smiled at Yuta as he sat down on the floor.
"I'm sorry what?!" His eyes widened as his cheeks began to redden.
Boy was that quick. She got straight to the point and here he thought it was gonna be a painting date.
"Oh that sounded wrong huh. Not literally your pants but an old pair of pants you don't mind being painted on and some shoes! This is my little surprise!" She said correcting herself.
She blushed a bit not realizing how bad the sentence sounded when she first said it. She laughed a bit shaking off her nerves.
"I guess we're both flustered now," Yuta laughed, "but yes I do have some pants and shoes brb."
He stood up to go head over to his room.
Jae z
Yuta looks so cute I could literally cry
And I'm a fool DJSJSJS
Hendery
Oh is that so?
You've been with him all day right?
Jae z
Yeah pretty much but look at him
Jae z
Jae z
I took this while he was looking for paints
I'm gonna explode
Hendery
Love bomb hahaha
Jae z
Lit rally 🥴
But yeah
I'm having fun
It's weird I haven't had this much fun
Without any alcohol or weed in a long time...
Hendery
This is good!
It means you're really enjoying it
Deserve if I do say so myself
Jae z
Thanks
OOP foods here
Text you later!
Hyunjae heard a knock on the door. She opened it to see the food delivery. She thanked the man and shut the door as he gave her the food. Yuta said he wasn't too hungry so she just ordered some rice cakes. They smelled really good and she was getting hungrier by the second. Yuta came back and they began to work and eat.
————
"Has anyone seen Jae?" Taeyong asked as everyone, except Hyunjae, gathered in the girls' dorm room. They planned on going out to eat since it had been a while since they all got together.
"She's out," Kunhang spoke, "we went to go eat but then she went to go get some supplies she needed."
"Oh she's been gone all day," Irene pouted, "That's not like her."
"For real," Johnny agreed.
"Yeah But you know what they say. College changes people, but not like in a bad way," Kunhang laughed.
"You got a point there. Some of us more than others," Yeri chuckled looking at Irene specifically.
"Hey I always like to get drunk at parties that's not anything new," she said defending herself.
"I think the biggest change would be Taeyong becoming a Tytrack fan," Johnny laughed.
They all laughed at his comment agreeing. But something wasn't sitting right with Taeyong. Hyunjae had been missing too often. It was very unlike her.
———
"Don't move I'm gonna mess up," Hyunjae laughed dipping the paintbrush in more paint.
"Are you sure you should be painting on my face?" Yuta asked with a laugh.
"Trust me this is the nontoxic paint," She smiled, "Almost done."
She was at eye level with him trying to paint something on him. Yuta tried his best to stay still but since they were at such a close proximity, he felt kinda nervous. He watched her take her time painting on his face, it was hard not to move because it tickled sometimes. He noticed a piece of her hair almost dip into the paint.
"Your hair," he said taking the strand and tucking it behind her ear.
Hyunjae froze at the touch. It was unexpected and she wasn't expecting such a soft gesture.
"Smooth," She chuckled as he pulled his hand back.
"I know," He smiled.
"No don't smile yet," She laughed dabbing some of the paint on his nose.
If she was being honest she was taking her sweet time because why she was painting wouldn't take long at all.
"Seriously what am I?" He asked curiously.
"Just wait," Hyunjae laughed.
Yuta tried his best to look around and keep himself distracted even though she had just started painting on his face. He noticed a necklace chain on Hyunjae. He had never seen her wear any time of jewelry on her neck so that was weird.
"Is that a necklace?" Yuta asked.
Hyunjae nodded putting the paint and paintbrush down, "Yup."
She grabbed the chain pulling it out from her shirt. It was a plain silver chain with the ring he had given her.
"It's not much yet, but I did this like last night cause I couldn't sleep," She chuckled, "Later I'll buy a different chain, add some different charms, maybe layer it. I have so many ideas."
Her mind had been racing since he gave her the pretty ring. It meant a lot that he wanted her to make it into some fashionable piece of jewelry.
Yuta smiled, "It's cute when you start talking about fashion and stuff. Your face like glows," He admitted.
"Design is my passion," she responded dramatically, "But thanks I really do appreciate it. Anyway, you're all done."
She grabbed the hand mirror she had set on the couch and handed it to him. Yuta excitedly took the mirror from her and looked at his reflection. A loud laugh escaped him. This whole time he thought she was doing some super aesthetically pleasing painting.
"I'm a cat?" he asked unsure.
"Yeah, can you tell I'm not a face painter?" She asked looking at her poorly drawn whiskers and nose.
Designing on a piece of paper or on an iPad was very different than painting on someone, especially their pretty face.
Yuta nodded, "Okay my turn!"
Hyunjae's eyes widened as he reached over for the paints and brushes, "Oh for real? This isn't revenge is it?"
"Nope, just trust me," He laughed dipping the paintbrush in the paint, "Don't freak out okay."
"Freak out?" She questioned confused, but she felt his hand grab her chin to tilt her head slightly.
She didn't know why she was blushing so much. She was used to much more intimate skinship with Kunhang and all her friends. Yuta was barely touching her yet she was so flustered. She didn't realize how long she was thinking about him and that simple touch, because had finished in no time.
"Sheesh I thought I would at least be better at painting on the skin than you," Yuta laughed, "But I was wrong."
He let go of Hyunjae and handed her the mirror. She took the mirror and looked at the painting.
"Is it supposed to be a heart?" She chuckled trying to hold in her laughter.
It was cute, you could definitely tell it was a heart, but the lines were a bit shaky. Maybe he was nervous too.
"Yeah, not my best work," He admitted laughing.
"No, it's cute! It adds character," she encouraged trying to make him feel better.
"Thanks for that. That reminds me since you gave me weed at the party do you wanna smoke? I have some."
-----
Sicheng entered Yuta's dorm, he was thankful that Yuta's old roommate had basically moved in with his girlfriend. Yuta's dorm had much better wifi for some odd reason and hence he used the room to play games on his PC. He was surprised when he entered the dorm and heard laughing. Honestly, it kind of freaked him out until he smelled the dorm. Yup, Yuta had just smoked.
"Yuta?" he asked shutting the door behind him. He looked around the living room only to see him and Hyunjae laying on the carpet next to each other. They looked at the ceiling as if they were stargazing inside the dorm.
"Sicheng is that really you?" Yuta laughed.
"Sicheng is here?" Hyunjae asked surprised.
"Yes. I'm here, what are you guys doing?"
"We just smoked. What are you doing here?" Yuta asked still looking at the ceiling.
"I came to play games cause of the WiFi. If I would have known I should have just gone to buy Kunhang." Sicheng said honestly.
The last person he was expecting to see her was Hyunjae and he wasn't expecting Yuta to be high either since it was a school night, he usually only did that at parties or the weekend.
"Where is hendery?" Hyunjae questioned squinting her eyes.
"Beats me. Anyway you look like you're having fun so I'll just head into the room and don't worry I'll have my noise-canceling headphones on all the way up."
"Okay?" Yuta questioned with a laugh, "Thanks for the info I guess?"
Sicheng groaned heading into the room, "You're too high to understand. Have fun losers."
Hyunjae and Yuta both just laughed as he left into the spare room. Sicheng was gonna have fun questioning both of them tomorrow. From what Kunhang had told him, it seemed that they had a thing going on now. He was happy for his best friend, but he knew that sometimes he doubted himself and his worth.
"So I need a backstory how did you meet Kunhang?" He asked remembering about Kunhang.
Hyunjae raised a brow holding in a laugh, "You're interested in that?"
Yuta nodded, "Yeah. Your friend dynamic is a lot like Sicheng and I. So I'm wondering how you two became friends. Plus he's cool."
"In high school. It's really weird how we met actually. He transferred to our school and immediately clicked with us. I remember the first thing he asked me after we had become friends was, 'Hey wanna go out to fool my parents into thinking I have a girlfriend so they won't force me to marry someone I don't like?' and his smile was like soooo serious I was soooo confused," She paused to laugh.
Yuta was laughing a bit thinking of how weird their encounter was.
"So i said yeah sure why not, because I did not want him to leave back home. It worked really well for a while. We would just pretend to date when his parents came to visit, but like then he had to move back and it suckeedddd. That's when I got really, really, super-duper, sad. I made a lot, and I mean A LOT of bad choices," She sighed, "All my friends really did their best to help me out of that funk. It worked but it took some time. I cried a lot, cause while everyone says they're my best friend, Kunhang is really the one who knew me like the back of his hand. There are things he knows that the others still dont. But it's all better now! He came back and I met you and your friends."
Yuta felt a bit bad to hear that Hyunjae had made some bad choices she regretted, but he understood. She had lost her friend, sure he was still alive but it really did suck being away from the people you love. He experienced it firsthand, but he was glad that she was happy to have met him. It honestly really meant a lot to him.
"Can I ask what you did?" He asked
She laughed, "Intrigued by Hwang Hyunjae's past bad girl life?" She teased referring herself in third person, "I'll tell you but you gotta tell me about you."
He nodded, "Deal!"
"Okie, well I used to go to these underground racing events, underground clubs, I did some questionable drugs and I used to hang out with shitty people and hook up with shitty guys, but like it never ever went far," She said clarifying it to Yuta.
He chuckled, "I trust you silly."
"I know but I don't want you to think I'm one of those girls," She said, "I am a changed person. What about you?"
"Well not as much fun as you," he said booping her nose.
Hyunjae blushed slightly.
"Well I moved from Japan as you know, but when I first got here I got into a bad state cause I was alone. The program I joined had a small apartment for me that was near the school, but it kind of sucked. My parents sent me money to pay for the program I was in and for necessities, but of course, I was lonely. I used to drink a lot after soccer practices, didn't do my school work and because of that I almost got booted off the team. That only made me even worse so I started to do drugs, nothing hardcore you know, but anything that made it easy to sleep or to get through the day. Then I met Sicheng. He joined the same program I was put in. He was even put in the apartment with me. He was the one who really put me in my place. He noticed my habits and told me that if I didn't stop I'd be a failure and be alone for the rest of my life," He paused thinking back to it, "I don't know why, but what he said really ticked something in my brain. I agreed and asked him for help. Not gonna lie I felt really bad asking him because it was not his job and he was busy too. But he accepted no questions asked. I kinda owe him a lot."
Hyunjae sat up taken aback by his story. Yuta was probably the brightest person she knew, she would have never guessed he went through that in the past. Yuta sat up wondering if he had scared her off.
"You're strong. Wayyy stronger than me," She pulled him into a hug, "I'm glad Sicheng knocked some fuckin sense into you." She chuckled a bit.
Yuta smiled laying his head on her shoulder hugging her back, "Me too and I'm glad you're not actually dating Kunhang."
Hyunjae let out a laugh, "Yeah I guess me too. I'm really tired though."
She grabbed her phone with one hand to check the time, it was almost 1am and they pretty much coming down from their high.
"You can stay. You can sleep in my room and I'll stay with Sicheng or on the couch."
Hyunjae shook her head, "I'm not gonna make you sleep on your couch or in the guest room. This is your dorm dummy."
Yuta raised brow, "Hm okay. So you're gonna sleep in my bed with me in it?"
"Jesus don't say it like that!" She groaned letting go of him.
"Wait no I want more hugs."
"I mean you're still hugging me," she laughed since she didn't try to move away..
"It's not the same but fine, I'm tired too," He agreed.
Spilling his past discrepancies really did drain him, but it was understandable.
"Here let me get you some sweats," He said going into his room.
Hyunjae took this opportunity to send a text.
Jae z
YoOOO
don't exaggerate but
I'm staying at Yuta's for the night
If anyone asks
I was with you 😇
Hendery
I knew you wanted to smash
Jae z
I SAID DONT EXAGGERATE
WTF MAN
PLUS SICHENG IS IN THE NEXT ROOM
Hendery
I was joking 🤨
Ur very defensive tonight
ALSO SICHENG IS THERE??
I wanna go 🙁
Jae z
I'm high 😇
Sort of
And next time!
Ok thanks luv you bye
She put her phone away laughing at Kunhang's reaction though she did understand why he was so surprised. In the past hyunjae never really hid her hook ups because she never expected them to go far. But with Yuta it was different she didn't want to tell her friends and then in the end be heartbroken.
"Okay, here you go!" He said happily, "I hope they somewhat fit."
She smiled, "Thanks, I'm sure they'll work one way or another."
She headed to the bathroom to change. Yuta pinched himself as she left. Was this really happening? Geez they were still in the dating stage but this different. He knew they probably weren't gonna do anything and he didn't mind. He really wanted to take his time to get to know her.
Hyunjae came out with a laugh, "They somewhat fit, but they are really comfy so it's all good."
Yuta laughed but his heart beat rose as he saw her in his clothes. It really hit differently. Though they were a bit longer she simply rolled them up a bit but from the waist they fit her almost perfectly.
"Cute," he smiled putting an arm around her, "Lemme show you to my room."
She laughed following him. His room was pretty normal aside from a few band posters and a small manga collection on one of his shelves.
"Your room is so minimalistic, I like it. It's the complete opposite of my room."
Hyunjae's room was filled with fabrics, sketch books, a sewing machine, and so much more. It was no wonder she felt overwhelmed in there sometimes.
"Thanks I'm glad you like it," he gleamed.
"Your bed looks soft I'm going to jump onto it," She said seriously.
"Be my guest," he laughed knowing he does the same thing all the time.