"Hey! Wait! I've Got A New Complaint"
Present
Toronto, ON
"Of course, you guys would make me wear a dress and look like a fucking tourist on your last night here," I grumble under my breath as I slide into the circular booth next to Bean. "You're lucky you're my best friends or else I would've ditched you at the door."
Amy can't help but crack a smile before sliding in on my other side, "Rosemary do me a favor and shut up. You love the tourist shit, stop denying it."
"If you think I'm actually going to admit to that, you're insane." I follow Frances' lead, placing the off-white cloth napkin across my lap before letting myself finally relax. With the young Cobain at my side all afternoon, the paparazzi thought it was necessary to follow us everywhere.
Never in my life have I been badgered so much, but I know it is only the beginning of what I will be dealing with for the rest of my life. I will no longer be seen as the 'old family friend' that Frances visits in Toronto or the music intern turned 'music mixing genius' (their words not mine), rather I will be seen as the woman who fucked two of three members of Nirvana. A homewrecker.
"Get out of that head of yours." Frances' soft voice fills my ears as she places a hand on top of my own, "Everyone else is irrelevant. They can think and say what they want, but the people who matter know the truth Rose."
"Bean I'm worried about my credibility as a producer more so than what people say to my face," I pinch the bridge of my nose with my pointer finger and thumb before glancing up and locking eyes with Casey. A sorrowful look was on the psychiatrists' face which told me all that I needed to know; my career won't survive if I don't step up.
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January 23, 1993
Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
This weeklong trip to Brazil has officially taken the top slot of my 'Worst Trips with Nirvana' list, so much so that it overtook the morning Kurt overdosed and almost died in his hotel bathroom.
To start, Dave is hardly around and when he is physically next to me, his mind is somewhere else. When we do talk, we argue until make up sex is the only 'logical' option we have left. It's been a constant cycle of this since I hopped on a plane back to Seattle with him in September.
Rather than taking the time to fix our relationship, we've done everything humanly possible to avoid being in the apartment at the same time as one another. I even went as far as getting a day job to avoid the awkward home situation I am currently in.
Other than my obvious relationship problems, storms have also been brewing over the other two members. Kurt is an absolute mess right now. His stomach problems have only gotten worse with time and I'm starting to believe this is due to the mixtures of drugs he is constantly injecting, snorting, or drinking into his system.
In Sao Paulo, I walked in on him and Krist snorting lines in the bathroom while Dave was propped in the doorway talking with them as if it was an everyday occurrence. Shelli was pissed when I told her about what I had walked in on and chewed Krist a new one that night, resulting in my tall friend avoiding me for the rest of the week.
Since then, it's been an ever-growing downward spiral for me.
Courtney is here, obviously, and has done everything in her power to once again make my life a living hell. She pulls Dave off with her every chance she gets, and he won't put up a fight to stay.
What was the point in me coming here? I don't know.
Now, I am hiding in the midst of the Rio de Janeiro crowd as the band once again butchers their performance. To Kurt, these two shows in Brazil are one big joke that Courtney forced him to do for the money. Two of the largest crowds in the band's history, and he's making a fool of himself because he hates the capitalist promotion it supports...
They weren't even halfway through the set before I retreated to the dressing room to retrieve my jacket and begin my short walk back to the hotel. For me, the set wasn't worth it. Kurt was stumbling all over the stage, forgetting lyrics and missing guitar riffs he'd normally nail. It was better than the Sao Paulo performance, but not by much.
"Trouble in paradise Mrs. Grohl?" The woman's voice made my blood boil almost instantly. "I told you from day one that if you messed around with my husband, you'd get burnt sweetie." My hand clenched into a fist at my side, and if I didn't have better self-control, I would've thrown a punch right then and there. "Poor little Rose, or should I call you Blossom like Kurt? Anyways, I'd start packing my bags if I were you because a little birdie told me that Dave's about to kick you to the curb. You didn't hear it from me though."
She knew she was getting to me. It was her goal to get me to physically abuse her in some way so the final nail would be drilled into my coffin. She wanted me gone and would do anything she possibly could to make that happen. "Tell Kurt I said hi would ya?"
The woman's jaw drops at my comment, but I give her no time to respond before darting out of the stuffy room.
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Present
Toronto, ON
A shit eating grin is on my face due to the copious amounts of alcohol I had downed at dinner. Casey and Amy have been doing their best to hold me steady as Jack carries our leftovers and Frances used her spare key to unlock the door to my apartment.
"Have I told you guys about," A hiccup interrupted my words making me giggle to myself before continuing, "Have I told you about Dave being a cheating whore?" Casey gasps at what I guess is my choice of vulgar words towards the musician. "Fuck man... When we got back from Rio I found this ugly ass bracelet with the name Jennifer on it and my dumb ass didn't put two and two together."
Jack placed the food in the fridge before pulling me up bridal style in his arms. "I think it's time you go to bed my friend. You're starting to talk with your sailor mouth, which means you're long gone."
"Fuck... I haven't seen her like this since 1998." Casey says to no one in particular as Jack silently begins walking towards my dark bedroom.
"I don't want to go Jack. This isn't like Titanic; I want you to let go." I wriggle around in the man's arms hoping to break free from his grip, but nothing seems to work. "Come on Jack I have less than twelve hours to tell you guys everything else that happened."
I can hear Amy chuckle from somewhere in the distance, "Actually we're staying for a couple more days. None of us feel comfortable leaving you just yet."
"But I have work!"
"I'll take care of it,' Frances assures me with a silent wave of her hand before making her way into the kitchen area to plot against me with my two best friends.
By the time we made it in my room, I had finally stopped fighting the younger boy. It surprised me how strong he was, but my intoxicated state didn't let me overthink the subject too much. "So excited to see tomorrow mornings headlines. 'Recent Scandal Subject, Rosemary Pierce, Drowning Self With Booze To Get Through Public Scrutiny.' How much more exciting can my life get?"
I fall back on the king-sized bed, allowing my body to sink into the depths of my dark sheets. "Were you serious? About the Dave cheating thing?"
"Fuck yeah I was buddy." A giggle follows my response as Jack takes a seat next to me. "When I was home he wasn't and vice versa. Dave is terrible, or well, was terrible at hiding things. He left this ugly beaded bracelet on the dresser with the name Jennifer written on it one night before leaving the apartment. I didn't think much of it, believing that a fan gave it to him on the streets or something, but then Shelli told me that she and Krist had ran into the two of them leaving a club together."
Silence takes over the room as my heart breaks all over again from the memory, "You didn't deserve that. You know this right?"
"Yeah, I know..." Jack lightly pats my thigh, our silent signal of 'everything's going to be okay', before leaving me alone for the first time tonight. "I deserved worse..."
Hey all!
Short filler posted in order to jump forward a bit in the storyline. I felt like writing about September - December would drag things out and I'm trying to move this era along a little faster now that we're almost to the climax of Part II.
Basically, Rose went back with Dave only to get treated poorly because neither of them want to be the first person to talk. As a result this person you may or may not know, Jennifer Youngblood, came into the picture and is slowly but steadily going to fuck everything up to the point of no return.
But yep! We're in the last leg!
1993!
Who is ready to cry because I am NOT.
Love you all! xoxo