Chapter 29
I woke up the next morning to an empty bed and a cold room. The memories of last night instantly came back to my head causing my cheeks to burn red and hot. I have never seen Noah like this. Not even when we did it the first time was he so... So tender and gentle. He took his time and really showed me that he cared for me. My cheeks went hot again at the thought before I quickly shook my head to rid myself of it.
With a deep sigh, I rolled on my back before sitting up straight. A gasped left my lips as I saw Noah sitting on a chair right in front of me. His eyes were fixed on me, and the moment that smirk formed on his face I knew what he was looking at. My eyes trailed down to notice my exposed chest. With another gasp, I pulled the covers to my neck then looked back at Noah to glare at him. He gave a slight chuckle before rolling his eyes at me. Even though he laughed, I knew there was something wrong with him. Just by the way he sat there I could tell there was something a bit off about him today. For one thing, he was fully dressed. He looked like he has been out, but where would he go so early in the morning? It could be that he went for a run, but why would he just dress himself and sit there just to watch me.
It was confusing but I didn't wanted to press anything. Instead I took a deep breath before running my fingers through my hair with my free hand. We looked at each other in silence. It didn't feel weird or awkward, but yet I still couldn't help but feeling that there was something wrong with him. He was keeping something from me. Before I could open my mouth and ask my questions, he beat me to it.
"How do you feel?" He asked calmly. My cheeks went hot again as I looked away from.
"I feel fine." I muttered before clearing my throat. It's too embarrassing to talk about it with him right now. Noah soon opened his mouth to talk again.
"You're gonna spend the day at Dawn's house again?"
I turned my gaze back to him. His eyes burned into me as a serious look just suddenly washed on his face. "I don't know. I mean, I want to but I much rather spend the rest of the day with you." I mumbled the last part unable to get my true feelings out. After last night I should not be shy around him but I can't help but blush even more because of it. Ugh what has gotten into me?
After saying that I stared back at him and expected to see a smile but I received nothin but a blank expression. There was no way of reading what was on his mind and that scared me. What has gotten into him? I have a small frown before letting out a long puff of air.
"I think you should spend the day with her instead."
"Why?"
"I just think that you should. You're learning about your past and I think being with her just fits."
"Are you trying to get rid of me, Noah?" I asked frowning at my own words.
This time he looked away from me and just kept quiet. I knew something was wrong with him and I couldn't help but feel hurt. This was just like the last time. After everything he would just get up and leave me. The first time I may have understood but not after last night. He's just so damn frustrating. Just when you think our relationship is normal and in a good place, he goes and does this bullshit. I didn't expect to be so upset this early in the morning. I hummed looking away from him this time.
"Where are you going?" I asked harsher than I wanted to but he deserves it. Noah sighed before running his hands though his hair a few times.
"Back to the pack."
My eyes widened at his words. I quickly turned back to him. "What?"
"They need me back at the pack. Things are going out of control and Dylan needs the help."
"You were going without me?"
"I have to, Tink. It's too dangerous for you to be there. I don't want anything to happen to you."
"I already told you that I don't care. I want to be with you. Don't leave me here."
My tears fell from my eyes before I could stop them. His eyes softened as he stared back at me with such a pained look on his face. He can't leave...
"You belong here. This is your home. This is where you were born and raised. Your parents would be happy to see you and you have Dawn with you. You can't come with me, Tink."
At his words my tears fell down even harder. Without thinking I got off the bed taking the sheets with me and went to him. Like a baby I found myself in his lap with my arms wrapped around his neck. His arms instantly went around my body and pressed me closer to his. Placing kisses on my temple and forehead, he muttered sweet words to me but they would not be enough to stop my tears.
I did not wanted to be away from the pack. They are the only thing I could remember. I don't remember who these people are. I do not want to be with people who I don't even know. I know they are my parents but I don't have any memory of them being my parents. By the pictures I knew that Dawn was my best friend, but I don't remember her being my friend. I remember the wolves pack and no matter all what have happened there, it had its good too. When will I ever see them again? I haven't even seen Alyson since she was hurt. I don't know if she's alive or dead like Jessie. What about the twins and Dylan? Will I never see them again too? I understand that Noah wanted to protect me, but after he did that, what now? Is he going to come back for me or is he just going to leave me with these strangers?
The thought made my heart break even more than it already was. I clutched into Noah's shirt and just refused to let him go. I felt like forever we were like this until Noah suggested I took a shower to calm myself. I took his advice and forced myself off of his lap. After my shower I dressed as slowly as possible. Noah was already outside by time I was finished. Apparently he called Dawn to pick me up and that made reality hit more on my head. I also took this time to pack my things. It seemed like Noah did his already, so when I was done the room looked just like how it was when we first came in. The tears built up in my eyes once again as I headed to the door.
With my bag in my hand, I stepped out and into the cold. I walked to the parking lot with the deepest frown on my face. When I reached the parking lot I saw Noah and Dawn talking next to her silver car. I took a deep breath walking towards them. Noah was the first to notice me. He sent me a small sad smile but I couldn't find it in me to return one back. Dawn turned around to face me and the moment I reached her she wrapped her arms around me in a hug. Pulling away, she rubbed my forearms before letting go.
"It's going to be fine, Alycia." She smiled turning back to Noah. "So you're going back home, huh?" She asked folding her arms. Oh don't remind me. I rolled my eyes at her before heading to the passenger side of her car.
"Yeah, the pack is fucked up right now."
"Humans?"
"Humans and the occasional wolf."
Dawn gave a soft chuckle and for some reason it irritates the shit out of me. I rolled my eyes again and opened the car door. I threw my bag in before slamming it closed again as hard as I could. They both turned to me and raised their brows. I ignored them and just leaned against the car myself. I heard Noah sigh, "I guess I should get going." His words stabbed me in the heart again. He's really leaving me here... Once again my tears ran down my face as they became uncontrollable.
"I guess so." Dawn muttered. She pulled him in a tight hug before letting him go. "Be safe out there, wolf." She chuckled.
"Whatever you say, human."
Their bond is sickening. Just as I was about to roll my eyes once again for the third time, Noah suddenly stood in front of me. One arm automatically went around my waist as his hand found itself under my shirt and jacket. His warm hand sent shivers as it touched my bare skin. I'm going to miss that. The other hand raised to my face to whip the tears.
"Stop crying," he mumbled pressing his forehead against mine.
"I can't stop crying. You're leaving me."
"For good reasons." I sighed out loud and at that moment he pressed his lips against mine. My hands raised to his cheeks as I pulled him closer to me as our lips moved in sync. As if wanting to pour all my love in this one kiss, I tilted my head deepening it. Noah moaned against my lips before forcing his away from mine. I couldn't help myself. I was once again a crying mess.
"You're gonna come back, right?" I asked through tear. Noah stared down at me with that blank expression again.
"I can't make you any promises, Tink." A whimper came from me but he quickly kissed it away.
"Can you tell the others that I'm grateful for all they done for me?" I asked softly. "And can you tell Dylan thank you for not killing me and for keeping me on his territory. Tell him that I think he's a great Alpha and I hope a woman can love his cold heart." Noah chuckled and I also heard Dawn gave one as well. He nodded his head before kissing my forehead. With a deep sigh, I removed my hands from his cheeks and wrapped it around his neck for a hug. When we pulled away, I gave him the best smile I could muster.
"Goodbye, Noah." He smiled kissing my head again, leaving his lips there for a while.
"Goodbye, Tinkerbell."
With that he pulled away from me and turned around. Walking pass Dawn he ruffled her hair and she shoved him away quickly. I watched sadly as he went to the jeep and got in. The moment it began to drive off, I started crying all over again. He was gone and it was possible that I will never see him again. Why does it have to end like this? Why couldn't we just be together? I stared at the jeep until I could no longer see it. Dawn soon came to stand beside of me. She placed a hand on my shoulder and smiled.
"Are you hungry?" She suddenly asked. Come to think of it, I haven't eaten since we came here. At the thought I suddenly felt my stomach growling. I pouted before nodding my head. Her smile then widened,
"Great because I know the best diner in town. It also used to be your favorite." "
"Thanks for doing this all for me, Dawn."
"Alycia, we are best friends. Even if you don't remember it or do, I'll always consider you as my best friend. Now get in the car so we can eat."
She patted my shoulders before heading over to the drivers side. I took a deep breath, opening the door and getting in. I guess I have to deal with it now. There is nothing I can do. He's already gone and I can't run after him. I should just suck it up. Whipping a few tears away, I looked out the window. I watched as the trees and building speed pass us. I could feel Dawn taking glances at me but she didn't say anything. She just kept on driving while I wallow in my self pity. This is much harder than I thought it would be.
I sighed running my hands through my hair as Dawn started humming to the music that was on the radio. This went on for a while before the car stopped. I looked up and noticed that we were now parked in front of a restaurant. It was way bigger than the last diner that Noah and I went to and I could tell it was much fancier. I raised my brow at the building before turning to Dawn. She was smiling at me before turning to open the door.
"Trust me, you're gonna love it." She stated getting out. At this point I don't even care if I got just a small sandwich. I was too hungry to be picky. I got out as well and met her in front the car. Dawn locked hands with mine as we walked in together. The warm air inside felt much better than the cold and depressing feeling outside gave. What was weird was that the moment we stepped in, all eyes were turned to us. Mostly to me... I frowned confused turning to Dawn but she simply shrugged her shoulders. Without another word, she dragged me from the door and towards a table that sat in the middle of the room.
"We used to come here all the time after school or on the weekends." Dawn said. "
"Isn't this a bit too much for a bite after school?"
"It would be for someone whose parents didn't own a restaurant."
"Why do my parents own a restaurant?"
She shrugged her shoulders but didn't say more. I was about to ask yet another question about my parents but a waitress came over and stopped me. Her mouth opened to ask their usual question. The woman eyes locked with mine and instantly she gave a loud gasp.
"Alycia?!" She gasped again placing a hand on her chest. I raised my brow at her but then realized that I am Alycia. It felt rather odd. I threw my hand in the air and smiled.
"Yup, it's me."
"Oh my gosh! When did you get back? How did you get back? Oh my gosh, we were so worried about you. I mean it's been about 5 months."
She kept on going babbling to herself in a fit of excitement. I turned to Dawn and watched as she just shrugged her shoulders. We turned back to the girl as she went on and on.
"Ah Miley," Dawn muttered making her finally stop talking.
"I'm sorry," she gasped again. "I'll get your favorite for you. You too, Dawn. Oh gosh, I can't believe that you are back!"
She went on even as she walked away. At this point I'm sure that the whole damn restaurant knew that I was back. I sighed running my hands through my hair. This is more stressful than I thought. I just want to go to bed and sleep this whole damn day away. That's all I ask for. I just want to wake up and be back at the pack. Or wake up and have everything go back to normal. Before I lost my memory and before all of this happened.
"You cut your hair." I heard from above me. I looked up and saw that Dawn head was tilted as she stared at me.
"Yeah, it was something I did out of anger."
"What was it?"
"I found out that the whole town were wolves. Noah didn't wanted to say so I had to force it out of some random wolf during a full moon."
"You're bold to do that. When I was on pack territory it would be like committing suicide if a human went out on a full moon night."
"Did all the humans knew about the wolves?"
"Well it was hard not to know. The alpha didn't parade around his pack to the humans and make us fear him. If you knew then you knew. If you didn't, then you're stupid because it was damn obvious."
We laughed together for sometime and it actually felt good. It felt good to laugh and smile instead of cry like I've been doing for the past few days. I smiled at Dawn again before nervously rubbing my arm. It still feels weird to be alone with her. It's not that I don't like it, but it's a bit off. She's not like Alyson, that's for sure, and nothing like Jessie. She was different like me.
"Tell me how the last alpha was." I suddenly asked her. A small smile formed on her face,
"He was so kind. I don't know how he was with the pack but he was warm and open to the humans."
"And the Luna?"
"The Luna was a sweetheart and she loved children. I can remember countless amount of time where I took rides on her back when I was little."
"You must have been really close to them." She nodded her head while looking as if she's trying to recollect her old memories.
"We were all close; Noah, the twins, Alyson, and I. We did everything together and went everywhere together. I wasn't a wolf but sometimes I found myself at pack meetings and riding on a wolf's back while they run together. I would do anything to go back to that."
"So you didn't like it here with me when I had my memory?" She sighed before trailing her eyes back towards me. A sad look formed on her face but it was soon replaced with a smile. One I could tell that was forced because it want was genuine as the ones she gave before. With another deep breath, she ran her hands through her hair.
"I honestly hated the thought of leaving. I felt the same way you feel now. I hated it here just like you."
"I don't hate it here."
"Sure..." I laughed with her again. That very moment I noticed the waitress was coming with a large smile on her face and plates in her hand. Behind of her with an older woman and a man behind of her. Miley, the waitress, placed the plate in front of us with her same large smile on her face. The older woman behind of her gasp.
"It really is you." She cried coming closer to me. Geez...
"Yeah it me." I muttered trying to give her a smile.
"I knew they were going to find you someday." The man said. I blinked at him before looking over at Dawn. She caught my unasked question and turned to the three people that was standing there.
"Ah maybe if you gave her some space. She just got back."
The three of them nodded their heads before slowly walking away. From out here I could still hear the old woman sobbing. That was something else...
After eating and plenty of hugs in the restaurant, Dawn and I decided to just drive around to see the place. She figured seeing places might bring back my memory. She even insists that I see my parents but I'm not ready for that. I'm not ready to meet them yet. If I met them then that means I would have to stay. I haven't truly accept the fact that Noah left me and I was stuck here. In my damn head this is all a day trip and by sun down I will be back home. It's all just a trip. I keep that in my mind for the whole day. Every time I thought about it, I would go back to thinking that this was all just a trip. I am not going to stay here. No matter how hard I tried to convince myself, nothing was working and by sundown I gave up.
By sundown I gave up on ever going back. There is no going back. I was home. This was my home and I have to accept the fact. It's not like I have a choose. Not one damn choice. As I sat in Dawn car in front of what was my household, my tears from this morning started building up once again. I don't want to go inside. I'm scared to meet them. To me, it's like seeing them for the first time and I'm not ready for that. Not after all I went through for today. A soft whimper left me as I whipped the tears away. I felt Dawn turn to me. Suddenly my hands were in hers and she gave it a tight squeeze.
"You don't have to do this if you don't want to." She stated squeezing it again.
"But I have to. This is my home."
"You can stay at my house until you're ready."
"Thank you, but I can't. I have to do this to get everything done with."
She sighed but nodded her head in understanding. This is it... With one last deep breath I opened the car door and stepped into the cold night's air. It hit against my uncovered skin and sent shivers down my spine. I took a deep breath and exhaled sharply. With a determined nod, I walked towards the large white door. Before I could punk out, I knocked on the door. The moment I did, I regretted it.
I'm not ready!
I'm not ready!
As I panicked, I noticed that Dawn was leaving her car. "I can't do it!" I panicked feeling my heart rate rising. She motioned for me to move closer to the door but I shook my head. Rolling her eyes, Dawn left the car and came to stand in front of me.
"What's wrong with you?" She hissed crossing her arms.
"I can't do this!"
"Yes you can!"
I shook my head and opened my mouth to answer but at that time the door opened. I gasped and turned around to the now opened door. My eyes met a pair of deep blue orbs. It shined under the moonlight with curiously dancing in them. My body went stiff as they consumed me. The owner of the blue eyed took in a sharp breath as their mouth opened slightly. Words could not be formed as I stared at them. I want to scream or say hello or maybe even hug them but I couldn't. I couldn't move. It felt like forever we were looking at each other until finally tears began to form over those blue orbs. The person sniffed slightly as they took a step forwards.
"Athena?"
Who? I raised my brow at her and turned to Dawn.
"That's your real name..." She whispered before sending a small smile. My eyes widened as I turned back to the person. Swallowing hard I opened my mouth to finally speak.
"Mom?"
The woman completely broke down. A loud sob came from her as her arms wrapped around my shoulders. "It is you!" She cried pulling me tighter to her body. "Oh my dear Athena." I awkwardly wrapped my arms around her shoulders and patted her back.
"It's nice to meet you, Mom..." She pulled away from me and stared into my eyes again. With her mascara now ruined, she whipped her face then place a kiss on her head.
"Where have you been?" She asked kissing my forehead again. "We searched everywhere for you. I missed you so much." We looked at each other for a moment. Her brow suddenly pulled together as she gave me a light shake.
"What's wrong with you? Why are you looking at me as if you don't know me?"
"Because I do not know who you are." I muttered looking away from her.
The hands on my shoulders dropped as she took a step away from me. "Mrs. Collins," Dawn injected now standing beside of me. "Alycia don't remember anything from her past. She doesn't know who you are." A gasped left her lips as she looked from Dawn to me.
"You are lying."
"It's true," I replied taking a deep breath. "I guess I hit my head when I fell in and lost my memory. I don't remember you, my father, I didn't even remember Dawn. I don't know any of you." She gasped again but this time pulled me into her arms.
Her tight grip almost choked me but I didn't complain. This must really be hitting her hard since she's my mother. She kissed my temple again and looked at Dawn. "How did you find her?" She asked.
"Well my friend found her and brought her back."
"Athena, are you hurt?"
In more way that one, woman.
"No, just my memory. Other than that I'm fine."
She let go another round of sob and she rested her head against my head. When she finally got herself together, she pulled away from me but took a hold of my hand. "Let's go inside, girls. It's too cold outside." She lead me inside by one hand. My eyes widened as I looked around. It looked almost as big as the pack house, maybe even bigger. Everything was white and shiny and I could only imagine living in some place like this. She pulled my hand until we reached what looked like the kitchen; a huge kitchen. Dawn instantly sat at one of the stool and motioned for me to sit beside her. I pulled my hand from the woman's before heading towards Dawn. A frown formed on her face but I didn't find myself caring. This was my mother, but... It's just complicated. I sat next to Dawn and took a deep breath.
"Do you girls want some tea?" M-mother asked heading for a pot that was already on the stove.
"Sure!" Dawn beamed.
"Ah where is your husband? Oh I mean my father."
A sad smile formed on her face as she stretched for some cups. "He's out on a business trip in Washington." My mouth formed an 'O' as I began looking around once again. We fell into silent as she made the tea. When she was done, she placed two cups in front of us with a bowl of sugar. I gave her a small smile before taking a sip of the warm tea. It sent a soothing feeling down my body and it felt me at peace. The woman, my mother, stood at the other side of the island and kept looking at me. I looked back up at her and raised my brow. With a deep breath she ran her hands over her face.
"I can't believe that you are back. I always imagine you coming back but not like this. Not without your memory. You don't understand the pain a mother feels when her daughter doesn't remember her."
The pain in her voice made me want to break down and cry. It's not my fault. I didn't wish for this, but I feel so damn guilty. Just by the look in her eyes I knew that she was grieving. She's hurt and it's because of me.
"I'm sorry..." I whimpered looking away and down to my hand.
I'm sorry to hurt you like this."
"Oh honey, I know it's not your fault. No one wants this."
"I'm so sorry. I was wrong. If only I have listened..."
She gave a chuckled before tapping her nose. "Are those words actually leaving her lips?" She muttered turning to Dawn who giggled.
"Yeah, it is."
"I get it. I was a little rude before but I changed." Mother sighed coming around the island and towards me. She placed her hands on my shoulders and forced me too look at her. I stared into her puffy eyes and gave a weak smile. Like before she kissed my forehead and held me to her chest.
"I don't care who you are. I love you either way and we are gonna work on your memory, sweetie. I am just happy that you are back home."
I felt her love as she held me. My arms wrapped around her and held her tight as well. I may not know who she was, but I knew that she cares but by the way she hugged me. Damn I wish I could remember her. For the rest of the night we talked and I told her where I was. Of course I left out all the wolves and danger I was exposed to. I told her that I was taken cared of and that I was happy. I knew my words broke her heart but she would still give me a small smile. She gave me a tour of the house as well. Just like Dawn's room, it was filled with pictures of me. My favorite was the large picture that was plastered over the fire place of what looks like me and my family. We were happy, I was happy, and I wanted to have that happiness back. By the end of the night I was tired. I wanted to crawl into my bed.
After Dawn left to go home, it was just my mother and I. She smiled at me and took my hand while pulling me upstairs. She stopped when we were just in front of a pink door. It was pink.... Don't tell me.... "This is your room." Of course it is. I sighed looking at the door in disgust. She chuckle before pushing it open. It was better than I thought it would. In fact, I kind of liked it. I guess it was because it was mine. "If you need anything I'm down the halls." Mother stated giving me one last hug. She kissed my cheeks,
"I love you, sweetheart." I couldn't find it in myself to say it back so I just smiled at her. She began to walk away and I retrieved into the room. The moment I closed the door, I broke down. I've been holding my tears for the whole day because I didn't wanted to be weak. Unable to stand on my feet anymore, I slide down the door until I was sitting in front of it. My hands covered my face and my sobs become harder and harder. Soon I was unable to control it. I don't want to be here. I hated it here and I don't know who these people are. I want to go back but I know I can't. I can't and that's what makes me so emotional. I shouldn't be though. I should understandings can't be with the pack. I'm not a wolf so I do not belong at the wolf pack. They are better without me and everything would be at peace. Yeah, everything will be better without me. Noah can go back to doing whatever he was doing before and Dylan could stop worrying. I'm home and this is where I belong. I have my mother and my father. I have my friends. I have everything.
I am home...
~~~~
Well all good things must come to an end. Thanks everyone who read and voted for this story. I'm grateful always. Check out my other stories if you like. Until next time, Jellies....
YOU THOUGHT! Haha YOU THOUGHT IT WAS OVER! It's not over until the wolves stop howling. See you next week!!
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