Lia James
I struggled to make words come to the surface. I wanted to say something—anything, but I knew that saying anything isn't what Andrew needed.
So, I decided to say nothing.
His face mirrored mine: pale and sickening, as we stared at each other. He could practically see the thought bubble that bursted out from my head with all the questions I felt threatened to ask.
So much information, in such little time.
It wasn't that I was afraid of what he's done, I was afraid that I would break him while he was trying to tell his past. The dark secrets that haunted his very life, ones that keep coming to the light, even when he's bringing them into darkness.
Andrew was in bad shape. He had a fragile mindset, and it was obvious. The way he looked as though he wanted to puke up all the secrets that he's been hiding, the depressed look he gave me, making it clear that this secret had been eating him up inside since the very day it happened.
Instead of just bombarding him with questions that would just corrupt his mind, I decided to pick one simple word.
A word that might just break him.
"How?"
He furrowed his eyebrows with sadness, turning away from me. His presence turned cold and uninviting, as if he were a piece of ice, chipping away and drifting afloat in the sea.
I take his hand in mind, not aggressively but more softly, to comfort him. I know he can do this, he's capable of opening up.
He did it to me once before.
He can do it again.
"It was the the day before the last day of sophomore year. I had spent the last three weeks doing gang related activities, because she had been ignoring me for who the fuck knows what." He started.
"She got all nervous around me before she started avoiding me. It was like she had all these secrets to tell me, but she didn't feel obligated to say. But I let it slide, because I too had secrets I didn't want to share."
"So, when she called me that one night, I was taken aback. It was the first time she contacted me in forever." He paused. "Little did we both know it turned out to be the worst day for the both of our lives."
FLASHBACK
It was late in the evening, June 13th 2017. I had just received a text from one of the gang groups I was working for that year that we were going to crash a superior gangs underground party to steal all their money and women.
I wasn't interested in getting the women, I wanted that money. It was the only thing.
I had received a weekly allowance for helping at my Dad's car company, and doing some cleaning at my Mom's record label, but other than that, that was it.
Unfortunately, my allowance money wouldn't suffice.
I needed to upgrade my gun, I needed more bullets, more gear, and mostly importantly, more parts to build my motorcycle. And my parents wouldn't even give me an ounce of money if they knew what I was using it for.
So, I was all on my own.
This job alone, if we were successful, I would gain about 50,000 which would be enough to cover nearly half of the items on my list. But, this was the only way I could get access to all this money, from stealing and fighting other gangs.
I hopped into my car, starting it and strapping myself in. I was about to put the car in reverse to back out of my driveway, when I got a text message.
My phone jumped in my lap, and I grabbed it, looking at it as the screen lit up.
BELLA: we need to talk. can you pick me up?
I cursed at myself. I wanted to give in so bad, but I couldn't just walk away from all this money.
It was selfish.
But that's the only way I could live.
I was selfish with Bellamy, selfish with money, selfish with everything. But I didn't care. I knew who I was, and that was the person I wanted to be.
Living in my world, love, compassion, happiness didn't combine well with sins, blood, and death. I had to choose one or the other. And if I chose one, I could end up dead.
I couldn't let love become my weakness, so I became selfish and hid everything from everyone.
I didn't tell Bellamy and that was my first mistake. She was my first love, and exactly the person I saw myself spending eternity with. She was stubborn, strong-headed, passionate, but most importantly, loving.
And maybe that's why I acted the way I did, because I was naive that my love with Bellamy was going to last forever. I was conjuring up dreams of her and I growing old together and watching our kids grow up with happiness.
That's all I wanted in this world to be satisfied. To have her by my side, to guide me through life's hardships, and everything that comes with growing up.
It took me all my might to reject her offer, and I almost felt compelled to listen to the voices in my head that begged me not to see her.
But I had to.
BELLA: i'm not taking no for an answer, Price. pick me up. we need to talk.
I decided to go see her, and we can talk about whatever she needs to talk about, and then I will leave and go see the guys.
I decided to let them know beforehand to meet up with me at the underground party, because I had other business to attend to before I went with them.
They agreed.
I then sped down my driveway and went to go see the girl of my dreams.
She lived in a quiet townhouse on the outskirts of the Los Angeles city. It was made of purely brick, with a small white door, and a white picket fence surrounding the front yard. The curtains of her front window were wide open, and as soon as I pulled up to the sidewalk, I noticed that she was pacing around in her living room.
What was so important that we had to talk about, that got her all worked up?
I quickly honked my horn, seeing her jump at the sound coming from outside her house. She races out the door, putting on her black furry jacket as she closed the front entrance behind her.
She jumped into the passengers seat in one swift move.
"Geez, Belle, calm down." I turned the car off. "What's got you all nervous?"
She sighs, her brown eyes turn dark. "It's nothing."
"It's obviously something." I play with the door handle of the car. "How about we go inside and talk about it?"
"Yeah, and your version of 'talk about it' is sex. So, no thanks."
"No it's not." I sighed, knowing she could see right through me. "Okay, fine. Maybe it is. But can we at least go inside and spend time together. No sex."
"Drew, my parents are home." She pointed to the old Chevy pick-up sitting in her driveway.
"So what? They love me."
She laughs. "No they don't."
"I don't know what you're talking about." I cross my arms.
"Really, Drew? How about when I brought you home for the first time since we started dating, and my Dad punched you in the face when he saw the condoms fall out of your pants pocket."
I was then reminded of that time, and fuck, it wasn't good. He screamed at me for basically fooling around with his 'little girl', who is sixteen and capable of making her own decisions. I suffered from a black eye for about two weeks, and no ounce of makeup could cover it.
I even asked Celina to help me, and she said I was a lost cause.
"Well, I usually put them in my wallet." I pressed my lips into a firm line. "And you can see why."
"That's not the point!" She yells, and I nearly jump in my seat. "The point is, they don't like you. So we're not going in there."
Well, there goes my plan of seeing her and then going to the underground party.
"Fucking hell, Bellamy, you're extra mean today. What's got you all worked up?"
She looks down at her hands, which were resting on her lap. She was...so beautiful, so exquisite, so unique. No one was ever like her, not even a single girl in the world could top the way I felt for her.
She was my girl. My world.
Or better yet. My whole galaxy.
She looked so fragile just sitting in my car, all brittled and battled from God knows what. She was very hesitant in what she wanted to say, wanting to spare me.
"I know you're hiding something from me." She confesses. "I know that one night you slept over my house, and you left in the middle of the night. I know that you carry a gun in your glove compartment of your car. I know that you have a safe of money stashed in your closet."
.....
Fuck.
She knows.
I bow my head, accepting failure from trying to protect her.
Now that she wants to know about it, she's going to want to see it.
She's going to want to come with me.
But I can't let her do that.
"How did you find all that out?" I said, nearly a whisper.
"You're an easy guy to figure out." She shrugs, but I know she's lying.
"Tell me the truth."
She looks at me, accepting defeat. "I went through your phone. Your text messages."
I bit my lip in anger.
I thought she trusted me. I thought she knew that I wasn't ready to reveal all the secrets I kept from everyone.
"You know." Was all I said to her. I was ashamed that she felt like she couldn't trust me.
But then again, she couldn't. I was keeping the secret of a lifetime from her.
"I know enough."
"Bella, I can explain everything."
"I don't need you to. I understand why you kept this from me." She paused, and I was a bit confused. "You were scared of the consequences. Scared that somehow the people you are working for will find me and kill me. Am I right?"
She saw right through me. Like someone looking into a mirror and seeing themself. Knowing every single thing about the person standing in the reflection.
I felt relief, knowing that she understood me. I looked over to her, she wasn't mad, or upset that I hadn't told her about it. She was content that I was so hellbent on protecting her.
I sighed, leaning over to her and she turns at the perfect moment. I pressed my lips softly to hers, and she softened. I tried pulling away, but she grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me into her. She kissed me, more passionately this time, as she climbed into the drivers seat and straddled my lap.
Damn, the way she makes me feel. I'm such a goner.
I take her small hips in my hands, and grind the lower half of her body against mine. As I did, repetitively, she moaned and pulled away from me.
I frowned, looking at her swollen lips. "Don't pull away, baby. We were just getting started."
She smacked my chest lightly. "We can't, Drew. We have business to attend to."
I furrowed my eyebrows, pressing my body against hers. She bites her lip in frustration, wanting to give in.
"What kind of business?" I said, trying to hold onto the least bit of control I had.
I began kissing and sucking on little bits of her neck. "The business that you're doing tonight. You're taking me with you."
I pulled away. "No you're not."
"Come on, Drew! We could be like Bonnie and Clyde!"
"Nope, not gonna fucking happen. The only thing you're getting out of me tonight is sex. I'm not taking you anywhere."
She scoffs, returning to her original spot beside me. I felt my body go cold without her touch.
"I'm fine with that." She paused. "But I'm not getting out of this car. There's...something I need to tell you."
"Fuck, Bella, I can't. I have to go."
"Take me with you!"
"I can't, baby. You know I wish I could, but you have to understand that it's dangerous out there. I can't risk you getting hurt."
"I'm not going to get hurt. I'll....I'll stay in the car. I promise. I just need to tell you something, and I need to do it tonight. And I'm not getting out of this car until I have the rest of the night with you."
I knew she wouldn't budge. "Fine! Fucking fine! But you're not getting out of the car, and you're telling me exactly what's been bothering you right after!"
"I will." She said as I started the car again.
We drove in silence, listening to some old rock songs. She loved how immerse I was with the 90's rock culture. She was too, her Dad had told her everything there was to know about rock and roll.
Our first date was even a trip to see one of her favorite bands: The Rolling Stones.
And after going there with her, and seeing her dance her heart out, the beat of our hearts as fast as the beats on the drums, I knew I was falling in love with her.
She was interesting to me. A puzzle that hasn't been completed yet. I thought that if maybe I could figure it out, she would be complete and happy.
But I knew.
I was the missing piece of her puzzle.
We needed each other to make it in this world.
So, I took her to an abandoned warehouse, right by the beach. It brought back revolting memories of the times I had worked for Skull and Spine.
Their blood, and their corpses lied in the top floor of this place. The mere thought of seeing them, wore down to only bones, makes me utterly sick. I felt light-headed and warm.
I parked just a few feet back, to avoid anyone seeing Bella in the car.
I crossed my fingers that this job would only take a half an hour at tops.
Get in, get out. That's all. No talking, no nothing.
I turned the car off, turning to my beautiful girlfriend. My life, that was only a few inches away from me.
I kissed her passionately on the lips.
"Stay here, please." I instructed her. "I can't let you get hurt. You mean to much to me."
"You mean the world to me, Drew. I need you safe too. Just get in and get out."
"I will. I love you, baby."
"I love you more."
"Not possible." I smiled, closing the door behind me and making sure to lock it.
***
Just walking through the corridors of the building gave me chills. It was like I was standing in the fight all those years ago, watching Spine and Skull die right before my eyes.
I grimaced hearing every voice in my head, every sound of people screaming, the smell of blood and the vision of darkness. It was gruesome how much this place haunted me.
I was filled with darkness, until I noticed a door, with a strip of light reaching out from the bottom. I knew that this was the right spot, and I opened the door slowly to avoid any disturbances.
I descended down a long, windy staircase. Some steps were missing along with a few railing pieces that were found at the bottom. I slipped on a few of the floorboards, as they moved under my feet and I quietly stepped foot into the underground party.
Boy, was the joint popping.
Poker tables were scattered all across the perimeter filled with at least ten people per table. There were tons of girls with little to no clothing, prancing around for men. At the corner of each wall was a private room, for 'exclusive' activities.
Yes, you know exactly what that means.
I was specifically looking for the guys I was working with. Crow, Sabertooth, and Blaze.
I've been working with them ever since Skull and Spine had died, and it was quite eventful. They would invite me out to drink and party, which I did, but then they would tell me we had certain duties to do.
Like this one.
I found Crow in the back of the great room, along with Sabertooth. They were talking with the guys who had all the money we were going to steal. They were most likely talking business.
Where the hell was Blaze?
Most likely getting it on with one of the hookers.
"Crusher! Buddy! We've just been talking with the guys. We were waiting for you." Sabertooth patted me on the back, sitting me down in one of the chairs.
"Who's this?" One of the guys asked. He scowled.
"This is Crusher, our youngest member. We call him Prince Charming because this guy is practically a magnet for every girl. Sometimes, even guys."
I ticked my jaw, staring the guy down.
"Who's this?" I pointed at him.
"This, Crusher, is Ghost. And his accomplices, Rose, Spike, and Teddy."
I looked around at his accomplices. Rose was wearing a leather bodysuit, with a gun sticking out of her bra. She was practically Catwoman, she screamed sex.
It intrigued me. I'm gonna have to tell Bellamy about this for our next role play game.
Man, I love the little games we play.
My mind, still wondering around Bellamy, and then I came to the realization that she was still sitting in my car, waiting for me.
"Nice to meet you all." I nodded at them. "I should probably go and enjoy myself. Excuse me."
Sabertooth follows me, as I walked to a poker table to play for some money. He grabs my shoulder, whipping me around to face him.
"What the fuck was that about?" He asks me.
"Tooth, I've got a girl in my car, who loves me very much, and if we don't get this money soon, then she might come out here and get killed. So, we have to hurry."
"I thought you said you didn't love?" He questioned me, and I mentally cursed myself out.
"I don't." I lied right through my teeth. "Hence why I said she loves me."
"But why are you in such a rush to get the money? What's in it for you?"
"Look, I'm okay with these men getting killed because I know that they're doing bad things. But I don't want innocent civilians getting hurt. That's not what this job is about."
"What are you, Superman?" He jokes, slapping my back. "Come on, let's get that money."
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Blaze eyeing a girl while she rolls the dye on the table.
At least he's having fun.
"What's your plan?" I asked Sabertooth.
"Easy. We all know Ghost has a soft side for Rose. Those two are practically fucking each other senseless every night." He looks over to them and I follow, noticing how Rose places her arm on Ghost's shoulder, looking at him lovingly.
"So, he obviously tells her where he keeps all his money. That's probably why she's with him in the first place. We need her to tell us where it is."
"And how do we do that?" I asked him.
"Well, that's where you come in. Crusher, you're the handsomest little fucker I've ever seen running through these parts of town. Did you see the way she was looking at you? She practically eye-fucked you, bud."
"So, I have to fuck her to get her to tell me where his money is?"
Ah, shit. Not exactly what I expected.
"Not quite. Here's the plan."
***
I found Rose, walking around the perimeter, eyeing everyone playing the games at the table and talking to some men.
I cross my arms, studying her, as I stood against one of the metal polls holding this wreck up. She eyes me staring at her, and then saunters to me.
"Well, well. If it isn't Crusher, the sixteen year old boy." She places her hands, against my chest.
"I'm not a fucking boy." I grip her wrists, and she gasps. She raises in eyebrow, obviously having fun with this.
"I saw the way you were looking at me, Crusher. I can tell you want something from me."
Hell, of course I do.
I want your fucking money.
She slides her hands down and under my black shirt. I instantly felt the cold rush into my abdomen from her fingertips.
"Holy shit, Crusher. Didn't know you had a six pack?" She roams her hands under my shirt.
"Eight pack." I corrected her, and she lowered her hands into my pants.
I grabbed them and picked them up off of me. "How about we take this somewhere else, huh?"
"Sure thing, sugar. Let's go to one of the exclusive rooms."
"No, not there. We'd get caught. We need somewhere more private."
"Worried that Ghost would kill you for fucking me?" She batted her eyelashes with mischief.
"I have many targets on my back, baby. I don't feel like adding another one. Plus, I like the thrill of fucking around in secret. Don't you?"
"Of course. It makes it more pleasurable." She takes my hand, and leads me to a hallway, filled with hundreds of doors.
There was one in particular that I had my eye on. It was an iron door, with a bolt and a key pad on it.
This had to be it.
"This one." I pointed and she laughed.
"Hell no, Crusher. I can't fuck around there. That's where Ghost keeps his stash. Even I don't know the code for it."
Fuck.
I need a Plan B.
While she walked with me to a room, I grabbed my phone out of my back pocket and texted a very important message to Sabertooth, hoping to God he would receive it.
This place doesn't have any cell phone reception.
"Here." Rose stopped at a door at the end of the hallway.
She opened it, dragging me inside. I closed it by slamming her against it.
"Holy shit, Crusher. This is going to be fun."
"Try not to scream too loud."
"You got any condoms?" I asked her, taking off my leather jacket and placing it on the floor. I knew full well this wasn't going to go all the way. It needed to stop at some point, but I need to distract her so Sabertooth can take Ghost's money and get the hell out of here.
"Nah, I got IUD. Plus, even if I didn't, I wouldn't care. I need to feel you raw." She purrs against my ear.
I grimaced against her neck, feeling disgust. But I had to do it.
No one can know about Bellamy and the way I felt about her.
No one can know I'm in love. If they do, we'll both be dead.
I rip off her body suit, the tearing of fabric causing her to moan. She takes off my shirt, roaming her hands against my naked chest.
We didn't kiss. I didn't want to.
Get in, get out...that's what was motivating me.
To save time, I hoisted her up against the door. She fiddled with the belt of my jeans, pulling them down a bit.
That was all she needed to free me, and I pulled her panties aside, knowing what was going to come next.
I'm betraying Bellamy.
I can't tell her. I just can't.
I needed this job, I needed this money. My gang doesn't make this kind of money because we don't have these connections.
But was it really worth it? Betraying my loyalty to Bellamy because I needed money?
The majority of my mind screams yes! Fuck her and you will get the money. But there's a sliver of my mind screaming at me to stop.
I was about to break my loyalty to my girlfriend, when I heard gunshots and people screaming.
I pulled away, pulling my pants back up, and putting my clothes back on. Rose stands there in confusion as I leave her in the room with just panties on.
I didn't fucking care.
Gunshots and people screaming didn't sound that good.
Not good at all.
Either Sabertooth got the money and got caught, or Sabertooth just shot Ghost.
But either way, it's not good.
I scurried down the long hallway, hoping that Rose wouldn't follow me. As I reached the end of the corridor, I stopped.
Ghost was holding someone by her hair, and she was crying.
Sabertooth stands back, looking at this girl confused.
As I looked closer, I realized that it was Bellamy.
My Bellamy.
My heart leaped out of my chest, as I felt my fear levels rise.
I took the gun out of my holster, holding it close to me, as I approached the scene.
"Drew!" She yelled, and Ghost looks at me with anger.
"You brought a girl here, Crusher?" He questioned me, smirking.
Sabertooth looks at me with insanity. He knows I had a girl in the car, but he didn't know she had the guts to come out.
"She's no one." I said.
"Okay, so if she's no one, then I could kill her, right?"
"No!" I screamed, whipping my gun out and pointing it at him.
"Crusher, what the hell!"
I mouthed four words for him: Go get the money.
He nodded, leaving the room. It was just me, Ghost, Bellamy, and the rest of the crowd gathered behind me.
"Is this your girl, Crusher? Your 'one true love'?" He mocks me, and I keep my gun held right at his chest.
One swift push of a finger and he's dead.
Just like that.
"I told you, she means nothing to me!"
"You're lying." He ticked with his mouth. He held her up more aggressively, placing the gun right at her temple.
Bellamy was pleading me with her eyes, telling me to help.
I told her with my eyes that I would try.
"Let go of her." I instructed, but he didn't budge.
"Nah, maybe I'll just hold onto her for a bit longer. She's pretty, maybe I can use her as one of my hookers. Dress her up in some slutty costume. It would be so fucking perfect."
"You're not taking her with you."
"Oh yeah? And who's going to stop me?" He challenges me with his eyes. His grey eyes spoke fiercely for him.
"Me." I say, nearly a whisper.
I pull the trigger, and he falls back. Blood splattering all over the floor, and little smudges of it getting on Bellamy. She wipes it off, as I run to her.
People all around were running in hysteria, finding the nearest exit they could, hoping to exit the building without getting killed.
"Drew." She placed her hand on my cheek.
"Bella, I told you to stay in the car."
"I did." She insisted. "But then some guys in the woods saw me and pulled me out of your car. And they dragged me here."
I looked at all the scratch marks on her arms. They must've smashed through the glass and dragged her out.
"I'm so sorry, baby. I should've never brought you here." I placed my forehead against hers.
"I'm sorry too, I should've never forced you to bring me. I understand now, how dangerous this is. I'm not going to come with you again."
"Good. Because I love you, and I can't risk you being in danger. Like right now. Let's go."
I pull her hands, but she resists. She grabs my neck, with one of her hands and pulling me into a passionate kiss. One that was filled with longing. One that said goodbye for us, if we happened to not make it out alive.
Then, I heard the inevitable.
Bang.
Bellamy fell into me, falling to the ground slowly clutching her stomach. Blood soaked her shirt, and spread throughout her whole abdomen.
She was shot. She took a bullet right to the stomach.
"NOOOOO!" I screamed, blinking repetitively. This had to be a nightmare.
Bellamy was dying. And it was all my fault.
I lay her down on the ground, softly, tears spilling out of my eyes. My face red with anger, and my shirt soaked with tears.
I looked up to see who did it, and I saw red.
It was Rose, standing near Ghosts dead body, holding a gun out in front of her. She gave me a deadly smirk.
"Now you know what it feels like. You killed my love, and I killed yours." She dropped the gun on the ground.
"You know, I thought you genuinely liked me. I was looking forward to some much needed relief. But you played me. And no one messes with me."
I cried even harder, knowing I had limited time left with the love of my life.
"You're right, It was all a game. Are you happy, Rose?"
"Extremely."
I got up, holding the gun I used behind my back.
"Wrong answer."
Boom. Trigger pulled.
She collapsed on the ground, along with her dead accomplice, as I knelt back down to the ground.
I knew I had limited time left with Bellamy. We were too far out of the area to get to a hospital in time.
We were practically in the middle of no where.
"I'm so sorry this happened to you, baby." I said, sobbing. I kissed her lips softly as she grew pale.
"There's...something...I have to...tell you." She said, her last breath near.
"What? What is it?"
"I....I...."
Her eyes closed.
I clutched onto her blood soaked body, screaming and punching the ground. This isn't happening to me.
This can't be happening. I can't lose her.
But I already did.
Sabertooth comes out of the room with the safe full of money. He looks down, shocked as I clutched my girlfriends dead body.
"Crusher we have to go! I just heard sirens, the cops are on us."
My heartbeat quickened, and I cracked her body, bridal style, and carried her out of the warehouse. I brought her straight to the hospital after that, hoping to have some kind of miracle happen.
Nothing happened.
Her mother and father joined me at the hospital, angry with me. I had told them that we were at the movies, and we about to leave in my car, but a person shot through the passengers side door and killed Bellamy. I had told them he was running from the cops due to a hit and run incident.
I didn't think they believed me. Why should they? They've never liked me.
And a few days later, when they lowered her body to the ground, I said goodbye.
Forever.
END OF FLASHBACK
I didn't know what to say. All of this information was so overwhelming, it was suffocating.
My mind was trying to process so much in such little time he spoke. It was hard to acquire every little bit of information.
He wipes his soaked cheeks, looking at me with heartbreak.
"That was how she died." He said. "Her parents blamed me for everything. I couldn't take it anymore so I left for months, and I transferred to Eastwood. That's when I met Mason, and all of them."
"Andrew....wow. That's awful. I'm so sorry." I leaned over and gave him a hug.
He clutched onto me for dear life, and I consoled him as he cried with all his might.
"You live and you learn, right?" He sighs. "That's why I was so secretive with you all the time. I didn't want you to end up like her."
"I get it now, Andrew. And I'm so sorry that this happened."
"I am too. But for some reason, I feel like I deserve it."
"Why would you even say that?" I pull away, cupping his cheeks in my hands.
"Because...." He pulls away. "Because I brought her there, and I knew there could be consequences. And I did it anyway."
"But Rose shot her. You didn't."
"But I still brought her there."
"Listen, Andrew." I make eye contact with him. "You did not kill Bellamy. She was begging to go with you, and you took her. Sure, you knew of the consequences, but you did not pull that trigger. Rose did."
He tried fighting back, but I smashed my lips against his. We both fell back in surprise, and I collapsed on top of him.
We continued passionately kissing, practically pouring ourselves to each other. I kissed him with every inch of love I had for him.
I just wish I had the heart to tell him.
Not yet, I thought.
We pulled away, breathless, as I placed my forehead against his. His minty breath blew hot air against my face, and I soaked in every bit of this moment.
"I couldn't possibly know what it felt like to see someone you were in love with die right in front of you, but I did lose someone close to me."
"Y-You did? Who?" He asked, curiously.
"My Mom."
He looked at me with hurt and sympathy as I confessed one of the darkest memories of my life.
"Your Mom died. How?"
"A fatal car crash. She was coming home from work, and a drunk driver smashed into her head on." I paused. "Yeah, I drove to the hospital with my half-brother Henry, and my two younger siblings, Noah and Layla. We said goodbye before she went into emergency surgery....She died on the operating table early in the morning."
"That's awful."
"Yeah. But at least I knew the doctors did everything they could to save her. She was the sunshine to my whole day, and since she was gone I went through darkness for a while."
"You did?" He laid his head in my neck.
"Yeah. I went through a dark depression for weeks. I didn't eat, sleep, or even talk to anyone. My Dad thought it was alarming because I was losing weight way too fast. So, he thought it was a good idea for me to move to California, with Mason and Lina for senior year. I never realized until now how much I needed to get away from it all."
"That's terrible. I'm so sorry you had to go through that."
"You as well. With Bellamy. She seemed amazing."
"She was. But, in a messed up way, I know that everything happens for a reason. If I hadn't taken Bellamy to the warehouse, she wouldn't have died, and I would've stayed at Harrison Prep. And most importantly, I wouldn't have met you."
I smiled at him.
I love you.
God, I wanted to say that so bad. But he was vulnerable, and fragile. I needed to give him time to heal before I dropped the bomb.
He's in love with a girl who died, and I need to give him time to think about things before I tell him how I feel about him.
"And if my Mom hadn't gotten into a car crash, I wouldn't have went to California and met you."
He smiles back.
"Fate is messed up, don't you think?"
"It is, but it amazes me how much fate makes up for all the bad times in our lives. It makes us the lowest of the low, but without the lows we wouldn't have the highs. We wouldn't know our purpose in the world."
"That's one way to look at it." He agrees with me.
We both lay in silence as we watched the stars dance above our heads. And we know that above us, there were angels looking down on us, happy that two broken souls mended each other together.
~*~
Don't forget to tap the star at the bottom of the screen if you enjoyed this chapter!!!
Wow. This was a long one. I'm so sorry for it, but I wanted to fit in everything I could to get this chapter out. I didn't want to split this chapter into two.
This chapter was necessary to move on with the story.
I hope you enjoyed the sad story of Bellamy and how she died. I wanted it to be heart-wrenching.
Mission accomplished.
So, as I finish this chapter with tears, hug your loved ones and tell them how much you love them. You never know when they could slip away.
Much love.
XOXO