Previously on Human Decepticons:
"Would you do me the honour of being... how is it you put it... Ah, yes. Would you be my girlfriend?"
I grin from ear to ear and squeal in delight.
"Yes! A million times yes!" I shriek while tackling him into a hug.
Apparently he wasn't expecting that, because the force sends up both tumbling off the bed with an 'Oof'. I land on top of him with a giggle, our noses are touching and I can feel his breath caress my face. My eyes flicker from his stunning eyes to his tempting lips as he does the same with my own. We lean in and before we know it, our lips are connected. They move in sync with each other as sparks dance from the places we touch. He brings a hand to the back of my neck and pulls me closer, deepening the kiss in the process. After a minute, we break away breathlessly with loving smiles.
"Best. Kiss. Ever" I grin, eliciting a chuckle from him.
(The Prank Wars - Part 1)
3rd Person POV
Jessica sits upon Soundwave's shoulder as she types furiously on her laptop. Her face displays a look of pure concentration as her guardian watches her with an amusement smile beneath his visor.
"What are you doing?" Kayla asks from her place on Knockout's computer console.
The three are hanging out in the medbay along with Knockout and Breakdown.
"I'm hacking" she replies simply.
"Hacking what exactly?"
"Rafael's laptop"
"Why?"
"One, he's a great opponent. Two, I might find something useful. Three, it's fun to mess with him" she lists as if it's completely obvious to her non techy friend.
"You're intelligent and evil. That's a dangerous combination"
"Aww thank you, you're pretty evil yourself"
"So I'm not intelligent?" Kayla raises her perfectly shaped eyebrow.
"Meh, depends" Jessica shrugs nonchalantly.
"Wow thanks" she snorts.
"You're welcome"
After a few moments, Jessica snorts in amusement.
"What did you do?"
"I'm pretty sure he's connected to whatever WiFi they use at the Autobot base. So, I set a song to play on loop on every device connected to it. Now I'm going to tap into his mic and webcam to watch the chaos" she smirks evilly.
"Can we see?" Knockout chuckles as he and Breakdown enter the conversation.
"Well duh. Soundwave, would you do the honours?"
The silent TIC nods and connects one of his data cables to her laptop and another to Knockout's monitor. An image of the youngest Autobot human pops onto the screen, he clearly has no idea that Jessica is in his system. The Autobot medic is visible in the background, focused on his work at a computer console.
"What do you even do on that thing? You're always on it" the voice of Miko can be heard, confirming that Jess has successfully accessed the mic.
"Coding, homework and other stuff" the boy replies.
"Boring~"
"Time for some fun" Jess chuckles.
Jessica presses a key and music starts to blast from the boy's laptop and the Medic's computer.
"Hiya Barbie"
"PFFT, OH MY GOD!" Kayla busts out laughing, recognising the song instantly.
"Hi Ken!
You wanna go for a ride?
Sure, Ken!
Jump in!
Ha ha ha ha"
"What the frag?" Ratchet freezes in confusion.
"Is that what I think it is?" Miko snickers.
"I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world
Life in plastic, it's fantastic
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation"
"What in the pit is going on?!"
"Who's playing Barbie Girl?" Jack laughs.
"Come on, Barbie, let's go party
I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world
Life in plastic, it's fantastic
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation"
"I can't stop it! I've been hacked!" Raf exclaims as he types furiously on his laptop.
"I'm a blonde single girl in the fantasy world
Dress me up, make your time, I'm your dollie
You're my doll, rock 'n' roll, feel the glamor and pain
Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky panky"
"Did I hear that right?" Bulkhead questions in shock.
"Is this really what you humans listen to?" Arcee asks, now concerned with the song lyrics.
"Who cares! Just make it stop!" Ratchet raises his voice.
"You can touch, you can play
If you say I'm always yours, ooh ooh ooh"
"I'm trying!" Raf shouts.
"Ah ah ah~, fighting me will only make it worse" Jess smirks as she raises the volume.
"I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world
Life in plastic, it's fantastic
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation"
"It's getting louder!" Raf panics.
By now Kayla and the Cons are a laughing mess. Even Soundwave's frame shakes with his silent laughter.
"Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ah ah ah, yeah
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ah ah ah, yeah
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh"
"ARRRGGGGG!" Ratchet lets out a frustrated roar.
"I can't stand this scrap!" Arcee shouts.
"Why was this even made?!" Bulkhead questions.
Bumblebee's frustrated beeping can be heard in the background as his pacing form crosses the screen multiple times.
"Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please
I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees"
"Should our young friends be listening to this" Optimus' concerned voice speaks up.
"Oh Primus!" Knockout completely loses it after that.
"Come jump in, be my friend, let us do it again
Hit the town, fool around, let's go party"
"Raf! Do something!" Miko shouts now that her amusement has worn off.
"Easier said than done. This hacker knows exactly what they're doing!" Raf yells over the music.
"You can touch, you can play
If you say I'm always yours
You can touch, you can play
If you say I'm always yours"
"Well it's not Soundwave! SO, DO SOMETHING!" Miko rages.
"Nope, it's the next best thing!" Kayla cackles.
"Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ah ah ah, yeah
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ah ah ah, yeah
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh"
"How long does this scrap go on for?!" The two wheeler demands.
"Too long!" Jack informs her.
"I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world
Life in plastic, it's fantastic
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation"
"FOR PRIMUS SAKE!" The Medic looks like he's about to break something now.
"I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world
Life in plastic, it's fantastic
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ah ah ah, yeah
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ah ah ah, yeah
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh
Oh, I'm having so much fun!
Well, Barbie, we're just getting started
Oh, I love you Ken!"
Silence spreads throughout the room.
"Is it over?" Bulkhead asks.
"I think so" Raf says slowly.
"Thank the Allspark" Ratchet sighs in relief.
"Hiya Barbie"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" They all chorus.
The girls and the Cons burst into more laughter as the torture of the Autobots continues... for three agonisingly long hours.
To Be Continued...
(A/N: This one's dedicated to FlammusPrimus , we all miss you in the chat and hope you can come back someday. I hope this chapter brings you some amusement)