• timeskip to: mars' seventeenth bday
"sit down, i got this!"
i shake my head.
"no, you sit down!"
"you're acting like i'm disabled!"
"you're in a wheel chair so technically you are!"
my mom works every single day of her life. it's crazy how she can't handle talking a small break, even when she needs it the most. she was and still is not ready to be out of hospital but she demanded that she had to leave.
while she was in hospital for that short period of time, i completed my drivers test and passed! i still haven't gotten the chance to drive by myself yet because of looking after my mom.
i finish up the dishes and go back to my mom, who had a scowl on her face.
"what?" i ask.
she turns her head away.
"you're mad at me for keeping you safe and healthy?"
"i'm the mother in this household! i should be the one looking after you!"
she rolls her wheelchair down the hall and into her room, closing the door behind her.
i finish cleaning things up, then go upstairs and into my room.
i open my laptop and facetime jaden.
"hi doll" he says.
"hi jaden, what're you doing?"
"cod with the boys but i can talk. ready for tonight?"
"definitely!"
for my birthday, jaden bought a disney+ subscription for the both of us to share. he said he got me some other gifts, which i didn't like since i don't like taking anything from people.
tonight i'm sleeping over at his for the first time! his family is gonna be out of town and that's a bonus because the day after, we planned an seventeenth birthday bash at jaden's house!"
i didn't want to have one at all because of not wanting to disturb my mom but jaden insisted i have one at his house.
i talk to jaden for the rest of the afternoon. as i shut my laptop, i hear elmo shout from downstairs. i grab my phone and rush down at the speed of light, only to see him in my moms room, tears filling his eyes.
"what happened?"
"no time to explain, get in the car and call dad. tell him to meet us at the hospital."
i run outside and into the back seat, calling my dad on the way.
"meet us at the hospital! something happened with mom and elmo is calling 911 right now!"
my dad immediately hangs up, which must mean that he was going to be on his way.
after a minute, elmo carried my mom in his arms, then placing her in the back seat beside me. there was blood all around her head that laid on my lap. oh mom.
once we get there, the nurses tell us that my mom's stitches after surgery broke up and passed out because of blood loss.
"how could they open though?"
"it's generally because they either weren't set yet or your mother didn't rest very well"
she really didn't. elmo went inside the room mom was in and told me to stay outside because he was afraid that i was gonna have a panic attack, especially since jaden wasn't here to calm me down.
i wait outside the room and pull my phone out. i was so anxious and didn't want to be a burden on jaden so i found myself on the girls group chat.
us girls can handle anything as long as we handle it together. right?
hotgirlsummerz 🥵 | 4:36pm
mom's in hospital again
idk what to do and idk what's going on
i feel sad, angry and annoyed all at once
elmo won't let me be in the room with him and mom so i don't even know if she's okay.
i really need some support rn
•
i go through the pocket of my hoodie and pull out my airpods. i put them in and play my chill music playlist to make me feel better.
after a few songs, elmo stomps out of the room and slides down next to me. i hand him an airpod and he puts it in. we both tried to relax in silence while we waited to find out about mom.
eventually, my dad showed up and went straight into the room. elmo then handed me back my airpod and followed to update my dad on what was going on.
i check the group chat and notice no one has replied, or even read my message. ouch. to distract myself, i go onto snapchat and notice addy's story.
they were all together. for some reason, it broke my heart. i mean, they knew i had to take care of my mom but they could've at least responded to my messages letting me know they were busy hanging out. i would've understood.
i go through my whole playlist, which had like 50 songs in it, which would mean that i spend two and a half hours being upset by my friends and by the fact that i don't know if my mom is okay or not.
i had a gut feeling and decided to follow it. i stand up and open the door to walk into the room.
elmo walked out completely frozen.
"elmo? are you ok?"
slowly, my dad followed.
"mars, mom loved you very much and i know you-"
"tell me what happened!"
"she's gone. mom's gone"
i stumble back, tears immediately filling my eyes. my blood rushed to my face as i suddenly couldn't breathe.
a doctor walks out.
"unfortunately her body wouldn't respond to the life support. we are so sorry for your loss."
i was dumbfounded.
"mars, they tried their best. your mom can finally rest in peace after all these years."
i shook my head and started to sob. i had no idea what to do.
"give me your car keys"
"why?"
"i need jaden"
elmo hands them over as i run away and into the parking lot.
i needed the girls' support but they never gave it to me. i speed off as i stared at the road. my vision was blurred as the tears kept filling and spilling out of my eyes. i was literally zooming to jaden's house. i didn't care about all the speed tickets i might get.
the thing that hurt me most was that my mom left when we were on bad terms. we had the small argument and i never got to hug her, or say that i loved her one last time.
eventually, i arrive at jaden's.
i wipe my tears away and fix up my face. i leave the car and walk towards the front door.
"babe what are you doing here? i thought we were meeting at 7?"
i walk in and he closes the door behind me.
i take his hand and drag him upstairs.
when we get into his room, i close the door behind him and sit on the bed.
"you okay?" he asks.
"why wouldn't i be?"
he sits down next to me and i push him down onto the bed. i take my crop top off and throw it to the side, leaving me in my bra and pj shorts that i didn't get to change out of.
"babe, what are you doing?"
"you've been wanting this for awhile"
i stand up and slide my shorts of as jaden clenches his jaw.
"tell me what's up first"
"nothing's up"
he turns to his tv as his hand slowly moves towards the remote, pressing the off button.
jaden stands up and takes his shirt off.
"right now?"
i nod.
"we're alone aren't we?"
"yeah"
"good. because i want you so bad, jaden"
jaden's eyes immediately went dark. jaden always expressed the way he was feeling through his eyes and that was so beautiful.
he connects his lips with mine and i slide his shirt and sweatpants off. his kiss was rough and passionate, the way i liked it.
why was i doing this? i just wanted a distraction to get rid of my pain.
jaden turned me around and kisses down the side of my neck as his hands find their way to my bra.
as he removes it, his hands slide down to my sides.
"you really sure, mars?"
"i am. it's not like this is my first time"
"but it is with me. just letting you know before we start that i won't go slow"
"that's the way i like it"
jaden smirks and grips the side of my lace underwear, sliding them down. i kick them away as i turn around and face him. he slowly scans my body before locking eyes with me.
"you're so sexy"
"show me how sexy i am"
"don't have to tell me twice"
you probably knew what happened next.
•
"fuck mars, i love you"
"i love you"
he pulls out and lays down beside me, squeezing my hand.
did i really just have sex right after finding out my mom died? my lips started to tremble as jaden grabbed onto my hand.
"did i do something wrong? did i hurt you at all?"
"no jaden, you were so fucking good!"
"then what's up?"
i stared at the roof.
"my mom"
"your mom?"
i look at him, tears running down my cheeks.
"is she hurt?"
i shake my head.
"worse"
he stops and thinks for a second.
"oh no. is she-"
i nod as i start to sob.
he sits up and rubs his eyes with the palms of his hands.
"mars, i'm so sorry. so fucking sorry. i should've known something was up" he asks.
"it's okay jaden, how could you have?"
"i don't know, you should've told me so that we wouldn't have done this!"
"what? so that we wouldn't have sex?"
"yes! it wasn't the right time! you needed comfort and support!"
"well i never got any of that!" i snap.
jaden crosses his arms as i start to sob.
"i texted the girls when i was at the hospital and none of them replied. they all decided to ignore my messages but still post lunch photos and videos on social media. i needed them so fucking much and really relied on them to be there for me when i needed them the most"
"why didn't you text me?"
"you do so much for me! you didn't need anything else on your plate"
"baby girl, i'd kill someone for you!" he says as i laugh through my tears.
"the easiest thing i could do for you is support and love you. i promise that whenever or wherever you need me, i'll be there! you can tell me anything!"
"i'm sorry"
"you have nothing to apologise for at all"
"i do. i should've told you before we did this. you would've stopped it"
he wipes my tears away as i sigh.
"you were amazing. it physically felt amazing"
"what about mentally?" he asks.
"i don't know. i thought that having sex would heal the pain i felt but it just put it on hold for a while."
"mars babe, i will be here for you no matter what you're feeling! if you want sex we'll have sex and if you just want to chill we can chill! you just gotta let me in and let me help you"
"god jaden, i love you so much"
"i love you too doll"
jaden held me in his arms as i cried everything out, hushing in my ear and stroking my hair every once in a while. once i got every last tear out of my system for the night, i reach over the side of my bed and put my bra back on, then doing the same with my underwear and shorts.
jaden slides on his boxers and sweatpants, then pulls me close to him.
"i wanna go home and shower but i can't handle going. i'd think too much about my mom"
"you know, my mom went shopping yesterday. let's see if she has anything new that you can keep"
the both of us go into his parents room. he takes a bag out from the closet and goes through it. he pulls a pair of underwear out of it and throws it to me.
"it's new, tags on it and everything"
"thank you jaden"
we go back into his room and i use his shower. did i say i cried my last years out? i was wrong. in the shower i couldn't help but start to cry again.
"mars, can i come in?"
"sure"
jaden walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. he slid off his boxers and sweatpants and joined me in the shower.
"come here, doll"
jaden let me cry into his chest as the warm water fell on top of us. jaden was such an angel, he helped me clean myself up even though i didn't need it. i just needed him there with me as i couldn't bear to be alone.
the both of us step out of the shower and dry ourselves.
"no one needs to know that we did this yet, right?" i ask.
"of course not. i'm not telling anyone if you aren't"
"i'm not gonna. i'm not ashamed that i finally had sex with you. i'm ashamed at the reason why"
"it's okay, no ones gonna know except for us"
he kissed my temple and i stood in his arms for a while longer.
we put our clothes back on and light candles to get rid of that 'sex-smell'.
"i need to cancel tomorrow"
"i know. i'll cancel it for you"
"thank you"
jaden's phone pov:
fam fam | 7:37pm
mars' party is canceled
addy🖤: why?
you're seriously asking right now?
addy🖤: what? was i already supposed to know?
hannah.r🖤: what's up with u?
you should talk
noen🥵: chill bruther
wym? i'm already chill
yousif🤩: clearly not
chase🤤: yeah, what's up?
hannah.k🖤: ^
andre😉: ^
jada🖤: ^
gabby🖤: ^
anthony😘: ^
wow yous are so cool for copying each other with the '^'!!
you might be wondering why elmo and mars aren't on chat
or maybe you guys weren't since yous are ignorant asf
noen🥵: we are?
i'm talking bout the bitches on this chat
jada🖤: excuse you?
anthony😘: jaden, you should relax
hannah.r🖤: wtf did we even do anyway?
yk what, i'm actuals shocked you girls are still ignoring mars on your gc
shame on yous fr, i never thought mars would have such shitty friends
but it's too late
mars, elmo and her dad are fucked up
why?
her mom's passed away in hospital today, which yous would've knew if yous didnt decide to ignore her.
now, ima go onto mars' phone and delete these chats before she sees this and starts crying her eyes out even more.
you've all read this? good, now i can leave the chat too.
you can no longer send or receive messages from this chat.