WARNING: SMUT THAT ISN'T JESUS APPROVED
***
Phil's dad wouldn't make it to Christmas. He had promised him that he would come to New Year's Eve, no matter what would happen. And he really wanted to get to know me. At least Phil had said that to me with a sad smile.
He had last seen him during the summer vacation. It has always been like this.
His parents divorced when he was six and since then it has been the same. His father came on holidays and when he turned sixteen, he flew alone to America to visit him.
We both spent Christmas with our family. Phil's grandparents invited us, but my father refused. He wasn't ready for it and I knew that. I wasn't too.
So we spent Christmas separately or on the phone. We would re-celebrate it, somehow.
Christmas at home was weird. Officially, there were no gifts, my dad just couldn't. Instead, I met Addy in my room and gave her an eyeshadow palette she asked for for a few months, and I knew to be honest that she wanted it as a Christmas present. She didn't want me to think about it and it was okay, because she was still happy. She gave me new headphones that I hadn't bought for three pounds in some cheap store.
And so it was okay.
We smoked a joint together for the first time after the hospital.
"It's Christmas, you can treat yourself." She said and I didn't mind. I was there and I felt that she was feeling better.
The day after Christmas, Phil's grandparents made us a present: they left and so Phil was alone at home.
"They're going to my auntie's and I didn't really feel like it anyway, and after begging a bit, they said I could stay here." Phil grinned as I asked him for details.
He gave me a new video game and said it was a shame we only had one.
I gave him a yellow sweater with a Pikachu face on it. I knew that it wouldn't be the only gift from me. We had ordered pizza, ate it, played some of his games, cuddled, made out and eaten even more.
The later it got, the more nervous I became. The nervousness almost took over me as we walked upstairs to his room.
"Dan, is everything alright? You are so tense." Phil asked after a while.
"Everything's fine."
"For sure?"
"I have another gift for you, if that's what we are gonna call it."
"Okay." Phil laughed slightly, a little uncertain. "What is it?"
"Me." I said meekly, more uncertainly than ever before in my entire life.
"You mean?" he asked with a frown. I nodded, because fuck yes.
"If you want."
"God yes." Phi's eyes wandered over my body as if he would undress me. As if he didn't know where to start and to be honest I just really didn't know. The last time was long ago and I also had a different opinion of myself.
"But." he started and I knew that it would come. "I can't just put my hand in your pants here, you know?"
"I know, Phil." I tried to laugh and actually managed to reasonably, because he sounded so sweet when he was uncertain and excited. "It's alright, I trust you."
He looked at me wide-eyed, as if he had never expected to arrive at this point and to be honest, I hadn't expected it either. Before I could count to three, Phil was on top of me and pressed our lips together again and again. I buried my hands in his hair, he was holding himself upright so he wouldn't just fall on me.
God, I wanted it, I wanted it, everything I could get.
"Are you scared?" Phil asked softly at some point and looked me in the eyes. For a while, I just looked at him, sinking in his eyes, hoping I could say no, but I couldn't. So I started to nod.
"I'll let you forget that you're scared. I will make you forget everything."
"Yes." Was all I got out when Phil started to suck on my neck and I knew that I would have some traces of him tomorrow. And I wanted that.
I felt Phil's hands go under my sweater and I was scared of so many things at the same time and Phil knew that because he knew me. Better than he should know me, but it was okay. I tried to believe that it was okay.
Phil pressed his hard middle against mine and a moan left me and for a second my brain stopped thinking and I wanted him to do it again. He could do anything to me if it meant that I would stop thinking. All I wanted to know and feel is just him and everything he did to me. I wanted him to be the only thing I would think about.
"You trust me, right?" I heard him and nodded.
"Yes."
"Okay." And before I knew it, my sweater was gone, and before I could waste another thought on that fact, I put my hand on his neck and rejoined our lips. I gave him complete control.
He started kissing my cheek, down to my jaw, every inch he could get and I just closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on it.
We both were hard. He massaged my middle and suddenly I wanted him as much as I never wanted him. Like I've never wanted anyone in my entire life.
I realized how he opened my pants and slowly slipped them off my legs with my underwear and suddenly I realized that I was completely naked there. For a second, I thought I was going to go nuts, but then I felt Phil crawl back onto the bed and put his lips on mine.
His dick and mine touched briefly and we both groaned into the kiss.
"Look at me." Phil gently asked me, putting a hand to my cheek.
I opened my eyes and looked directly into his. I couldn't say a word, absolutely nothing, and all I could think of was fucking hell, this boy was pretty and that I didn't want anything but him and was on the verge of going crazy because of him. If I said something I would just beg for him, so I better shut up.
"I love you." He said so softly, almost like an angel, and at that moment I was fully convinced that he was one. I still couldn't say anything, so I simply nodded.
His hand left my cheek, but we still looked at each other until he put his hand around my penis and I threw my head back.
"Fuck, Phil!" I groaned.
I would freak out, go crazy, and all because of him. Because I wanted him too much, more than anything else in this world. Could I wish for anything, no matter what, it would be him.
Phil jerked me off a few times before he let go and I whimpered. He kissed me.
"I've often thought about this." He played with my ear between his teeth. "I don't know where to start. I want to do so much with you."
"Make a list. We can work everything off. God, fuck, I want to work it all off. Everything you want."
"Someone's needy, I see." I opened my eyes and fuck, I had never seen Phil like this. He had a kind of hunger in his eyes and if I wasn't lying in front of him, I wouldn't believe he was looking at me like that. "Stay the way you are."
He got up quickly and went to his dresser where he seemed to be looking for something. I knew what he was looking for and shit, this excited me. I shivered slightly and I didn't know if it came from the now subconscious fear or just the fact that I was really horny and couldn't wait to get fucked by Phil.
Phil threw the bottle of lube on the bed and I automatically spread my legs, whereupon Phil chuckles.
"Can't wait, huh?" At any other moment, I would have said something cheeky or joked, but not this time. I couldn't wait, I wanted him, right now.
Phil knelt between my legs and opened the tube, whereupon he spread some of the substance on his fingers. I felt his fingers on my entrance and took a deep breath, trying to relax until he pushed a finger into me.
I closed my eyes, trying to get used to it. Phil was careful and when I opened my eyes again, I actually had to laugh slightly.
"You look so concentrated." I giggled.
"I am." He smiled back and put a second finger into me.
"God, shit, Phil." I dropped my head onto the pillow.
"Good?"
"Yeah." I closed my eyes, focusing only on the feeling of Phil's fingers inside of me. My hand clawed at the sheets and I really had to make an effort to breathe normally. At some point I realized how Phil took my hand which clawed so tightly into the sheets. I squeezed slightly. He was here, I was too. This really happened and it felt so good.
When he met my prostate, it was unexpected and I groaned, arching my back, pressing my eyes shut even more. A few seconds later, there were three fingers that opened me up and repeatedly stroked my sweetspot.
Phil kissed my knee, the body part closest to him.
"You look so good." I heard him say and if I wasn't so fucking full and horny, maybe I would have answered something. "Should I use a condom? I mean, I'm clean, but maybe-"
"Just do it."
I whimpered pitifully as he pulled his fingers away from me, but these were replaced relatively quickly by his dick. He slowly entered me, cautiously, while I held my breath and squeezed his hand, which was still under mine. When he was completely inside me, I swallowed hard, couldn't believe for a few seconds that this was real, until I felt his lips briefly on mine.
Our chest touched and I didn't know which heart beat belonged to whom. Phil trembled slightly, I did too, his forehead glistened slightly with sweat, and in that moment I was perfectly sure he was the most beautiful human being I'd ever seen in my entire life.
"Fuck, Dan." Phil exhaled after a while.
"I'm okay, move."
Slowly, uncertainly, he moved his hips until we both found a good rhythm and got lost in each other. I squeezed my eyes shut and groaned again and again as Phils breath hitched.
At some point, Phil put his hands on my hips and I put mine on his upper arms. His bumps became more and more secure and harder until he hit that one particular spot that made me see stars. I groaned, feeling like I was going crazy, as if I was going to die if he didn't continue like that.
"Holy shit, Phil!" I groaned, because it was all that I got out of me at that moment.
"Are you close?" I couldn't say anything, so I nodded uncontrollably.
When I felt Phil's hand on my dick, it almost seemed like it was too much.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" was all that I somehow got out of me. It was too much, but I didn't want less. I wanted everything, everything I could get.
"Let go, Dan."
He got faster until I groaned loudly and came. I shivered more than before and I felt Phil come and ride it out until he pulled away and threw himself on the bed next to me. I had a hand in my hair, cum over my stomach and chest and if I didn't know any better, I would think I was about to die.
***
make sure to you!Yeah, smut, finally. I'll go to hell.
Also, the longest chapter of this fanfic so far is just porn, love that.
also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO PHIL
CAN ANYONE BELIEVE HE'S 33 YEARS OLD?!
I CAN'T.
I hope he has a great day :)