Quick note: this chapter is about Athena and Silas strictly, just to give you an insight on their relationship and introduce you better to Silas. The next chapters will continue on in their regular order!
_____________________________
A&S
~Athena's POV~
As I lay on the grass waiting for him to arrive, I take in the scintillating stars that twinkled above me like a thousands fireflies igniting the sky. The midnight dark canvas was streaked with hints of breathtaking amethyst and sapphire, as the soft rustling of the leaves lulled any remanence of daylight to sleep. Crackling of the crisp autumn leaves scattered along the grass was heard, as gentle footsteps became distinguished.
A tall muscular silhouette appeared in the darkness of this sphinx like night. There he was all mysterious and godly. His colossal figure towered over mine, as I erected off the grass. His droopy curly hair fell over those hypnotizing cat like emeralds he called eyes.
_ "Silas... you're late" I retort.
_ "sorry darling, hope I didn't make you wait too long. I just had to quickly get something on my way here." He justifies, making a bouquet of bordeaux roses appear from behind his back.
This little yet sweet gesture couldn't allow me to be mad at him, although he still had a-lot of explaining to do.
...
Silas and I had a complicated relationship ever since we met. I'm not quite sure what it was. Whatever is going on between us had escalated from a one night stand, to a friendship, to having a friends with benefits affair, to this unfamiliar feeling I would call lust. It's like whenever I see him I get this tingly sensation in the pit of my stomach, a mixture of nervousness and ... something I'm unfamiliar with. If you have been reading this story, you should know by now that I usually don't give a flying hippos fuck about anyone or anything other than my group of friends. Aka I am never nervous around anyone, or under any circumstance... Could I be crushing on him? Possibly.
Nevertheless, as I mentioned previously, Silas is a mysterious, better yet shady guy. He is also an arrogant prick and an utter ass. Well... not always, he can be sweet as you witnessed, but he is, most of the time... an arrogant ass. Why? Allow me to elaborate:
We sleep together once...then he ignores me or goes missing for about a week. Then he comes back and acts all weird, before apologizing. Everything goes back to normal once again... until we share some kind of physical contact, or have a deep conversation where he usually shuts me out and turns defensive. After that, he goes back to disregarding me... and the same shit happens again and again. It's like we're stuck in a loop.
Usually, in such situations, I would just up and walk away. But with Silas... there's just something about him that just keeps me patient and hopeful.
_ "you know the roses won't change a thing if you won't talk... you mind explaining why you keep ignoring me and disappearing?" I deadpan.
_ "well... um, you see." He fumbles.
_ "yeaahh... go onnn..."
_ "I've been spending a lot of time with Clyde... s-since h-he uhh... ummm, he's still looking for a uh um a job after t-th-the Underground burned dow-n, a-and he's s-still recovering from h-hi-his heartbreak af-after Heaven b-broke things o-off wi-with hi-" he stutters. Silas sucks at speaking about himself and his feelings. He is also horrible at lying.
_ "Silas use your goddamn words!" My restraint was running out.
_ "YOU KNOW WHAT!?" He begins to raise his voice. I shoot him an excruciating stare and his tone lowers back to normal, but in it you could still hear the rage and unsteadiness. "I don't have to explain myself. I don't have to explain anything to you!"
This was the last straw.
/Silas's POV/
In a blink of an eye, Athena erupted:
_ "HOW IS YOU, IGNORING ME AFTER ANY LITTLE AFFECTIONATE MOMENT, NOT MY BUSINESS? HOW IS YOU GETTING ALL DEFENSIVE AND RUDE WHENEVER I TRY TO GET YOU TO OPEN UP, FOR YOUR OWN GOOD, NOT MY BUSINESS? YOU CANT KEEP YOUR EMOTIONS PENT UP INSIDE OF YOU! YOU'LL CRACK SOONER OR LATER."
Even though in comparison to me, Athena is tiny, she still manages to scare the living crap out of me. Never have I ever seen such a little firecracker cause such an explosion. At her words, I shut my mouth and shrunk back. She sighs:
_ "you know what... maybe it isn't any of my business, but you owe me an explanation," she says her tone calming, "I want to understand if I'm doing anything wrong. I want to know what to do. I can't keep on playing this bullshit game Silas... so please, all I'm asking is a little insight."
Now it's me who sighs. She was right, my actions were unjustified. But how can I open up? How can a person, who has been ordered and threatened to shut up by his father every time he wanted to speak, break this curse and speak up?
_ "My childhood hasn't been easy. All the heinous and vile things I've had to witness as a child, have left me scarred and traumatized." I start, taking a seat on the dew covered grass, and laying my back against the robust trunk of the oak behind me. "After my mother married my father and got pregnant with me, that's when his behavior changed, and his true colors started to appear... my father abused my mother while she was carrying me. It started off verbal, but that quickly changed. During my entire childhood, I always would see him hit her uncontrollably. He would punch her, kick her, and slam her head against walls showing no mercy."
Now, in mind mind, I could recall her yelling, screaming and pleading. The sounds I heard still haunt me to this day. Athena quietly sat by my side, and took my hand in hers. Immediately, my tense shoulders relaxed, and the knot in my throat untied.
_ "as a child, I couldn't do anything. The only thing I could do, was lock myself in my bedroom, and wait for the chaos to end. But as I grew older, things progressively started to worsen. That monster had started to hit me too. At the age of 7, I would always go to school with a black swollen eye, or a ripped lip and eyebrow, and a bruised face. Everyone would ask me what had happened, students, teachers and passers by, but I never said anything. He would threaten to kill my mother if I ever told a soul about his doings. I had to lie to everyone... take the blame, say I got into a fight or had a something fall on my face as I climbed shelves in my basement. For that, I was then known as a rogue, undisciplined and disobedient child. I had a horrible reputation which lasted ever since the age of 7, till 16." Athena now laid her head on my shoulder, clutching my arm. She didn't say a thing, but her silence spoke a thousand words...
"I then got into drugs, at 15. I was depressed, I had anxiety and paranoia, I was helpless. Things only went down hills, and everything crumbled. I got involved in shady shit that I'm definitely not proud of. At the age of 16, my mother got pregnant again with my baby sister, Sahiye, which means auspicious blessing in Japanese. Even while carrying his child, he would still beat her and treat her like crap. This is when I knew I had to step in, I couldn't take it anymore. He tortured my mother, treated her like she was a slave, like she deserved nothing, despite her leaving everything behind in Japan and coming back to America with him...
One night, when I came back home from school, I heard my mother yelling in agonizing pain. I ran into the living room and I saw her lying on the floor, clutching her stomach. Under her spread a pool of scarlet blood as he continued on kicking her. This scene is unfortunately imprinted in my mind forever, and it will torment me for the rest of my life. I-i ran in and stepped between them. He slapped me hard across the face, pushing me out of the way, but I gripped him by the hand and he came tumbling with me. I sat on-top of him and started punching him on and on and on... my hands started bleeding and the pain I felt was too much to bear, but the sight of my mother, lying there practically lifeless on the bloodied carpet, pushed me to hurt him even more. Luckily for me, the neighbors had heard the yelling and called the cops. Long story short, as soon as they arrived, my father tried pulling out his gun from a drawer in the table, but one of the officers shot him dead..."
~Athena's POV~
Silas sniffs. I felt my heart squeeze in my chest, and I felt the urge to hug him. So I did. I had no idea how horrible his childhood was.
_ "after that, my mother was hospitalized and we moved to Australia, as far away from so called home as possible, for a new start. My mom is still there with my sister, she cannot bear coming back here, but I came back to visit Clyde and happened to be accepted at USBH. So here I am" he chuckled. I hugged him tighter. "Now you know the reason behind my actions"
_ "you know... I don't want you to feel like that changed the way I perceive you..." I begin. "Actually, it did. I now see how brave, gallant and strong you are. You managed to get through hell, and look at you. Just look at the person you have become, such an independent handsome and smart man. Everyone has things they've done that they aren't proud of, and everyone has went through a dark period in their life. The only difference among people is, some manage to rise from the ashes and take off once again like a phoenix, and some dwell in those ashes until they themselves turn into ones. Just know, that I am proud of you and I really appreciate you opening up to me... although this doesn't really answer my question..." I say.
_ "well, I just thought that I'd share with you my past as you've told me everything about yours, from the death of your parents, to stripping for a while, to the whole pregnancy incident with Justus and his girlfriend, all leading up to Landon's father basically adopting you." He explains. I exhale sharply.
_ "The reason... I-i keep ignoring you after ... we w-we have s-sex and- or share any kind of contact is because... well... ughhhh..." Silas grunts, then clears his throat and continues more clearly, "you know I'm the type of guy who doesn't do feelings, not just because I'm afraid I'll end up like my father, but because I decided not to have any strings attached and live my life to the fullest... also because quite honestly, I'm afraid of feelings."
_ "first off, you are nothing like that demon. Second off, what's your point?" I ask curiously...
_ "Athena I like you, okay? And I keep on running off because I'm afraid of falling for you and getting too attached. I'm afraid of the fact that you might not feel the same way and that I'll get rejected. I'm-"
I cut the blabbering Silas off by pressing my lips to his and indulging him in a passionate lustrous kiss. His hands quickly find their way to my thighs and I wrap my hands around his neck, tugging at his soft and adorable curls.
_ "I like you too Silas"