Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who's reading, and thanks so much for the positive feedback. As always hope you like it :)
Tori's POV:
I wake up from my nap about an hour or two later, and frown when I realise that I'm alone in bed. I sit up, and run a hand through my hair. I somehow keep forgetting that Jade and I aren't real.. That I'm just a tool in her plot to get Beck back. As much as I tell myself that I shouldn't be falling for her, I can't help but to feel these emotions towards her. I just gotta keep my emotions in check every now and then, and make sure that I don't get too close with her. I hated the feeling I felt as soon as she reminded me that we're fake.
I sigh and get out of bed, and go downstairs. I hear voices come from the kitchen, so I walk towards them. As I enter the kitchen with a yawn, Tyler runs up to me and smiles.
"Tori! You're up. C'mon, I wanna tell you the story about how I-"
"Tyler, she just woke up. Don't bombard her with another one of your extremely long stories" Crystal cuts him off, and I chuckle as I ruffle his hair up a little. I see Jade on her phone, leaning against the counter in the kitchen so I walk up to her.
Remember Tori. Not too close or intimate.
"Hey" I say quietly, and she immediately looks up from her phone, giving me a small smile.
"Finally." she responds, and I roll my eyes at her playfully. Then, she leans in to peck me on my lips, but I quickly turn so it lands on my cheek instead. When she pulls back, she has a glare on her face, and I awkwardly just smile back at her. Before she tries to kiss me again, I quickly walk over to Crystal and talk to her for a bit. She's making some dinner, and we laugh about things for a while. I help set up the table, and then take a seat. Tyler sits down opposite me, and talks about his story, that I'm honestly not really listening to, and then Jade comes to sit beside me. As soon as she sits down, she forcefully grabs my hand under the table, and links our fingers together.
What's the point of holding hands if no one can even see us?
I try to remove my hand after a while, but she has a firm grip on it.
"What is up with you all the time?" Jade harshly whisper-shouts at me to the side, and I nervously shake my head, giving her a small shrug. She raises an eyebrow at me, but thankfully drops it, and we go back to our dinner. The rest of dinner goes by pretty smoothly, and as we're finishing up, Jade finally lets go of her death grip on my hand. But it only lasts a second, as she just wanted to go up to the sink to put her plate away, and then she's back to crushing my poor hand.
"What movie do you wanna watch?" Jade asks me all of a sudden, not looking up from her phone as she speaks to me.
"I don't mind" I mutter, and she looks up at me giving me a suspicious look.
"Vega, we really need to talk" she tells me, as she grabs my wrist and pulls me out of the dining room. I say a quick bye to Tyler, and a thanks to Crystal before I'm out of the room. She pulls me all the way upstairs to her room, and my arm seriously hurts now from her aggressiveness.
"Ow." I say in a bold tone, and she locks her room, making me a little nervous for some reason.
"What is wrong with you? One minute you're happy, and the next you act like you hate me. I'm having fucking whiplash coz of your mood swings Vega!" she yells at me, and I flinch at her a little.
"I don't hate you.." I say as I walk around her and sit down on the bed, trying to avoid her even though it's pointless to even try. She sits really close next to me on the bed, and I shift a bit to my left. I don't wanna be too close to her or else I'll fall for her again..
"See! You're fucking do it again!" she shouts, and I try to stay calm.
"Jade.." I softly say, but she doesn't let me finish.
"What, am I some sort of freak that you can't sit beside!?" she shouts, and I shake my head. "Am I that fucking hard to be around?" she says, her tone faltering a bit. She sounds like she's getting upset.
Ugh Toriii. Look what you've done.
"Do you hate me that much Tori?" she asks, her tone completely weak now. Not mad, but mostly hurt.
"Jade.. I don't hate you.." I say in an unsure voice.
"Then why do you keep distancing yourself from me?"
I think about it. I obviously can't tell her the truth. I'm not gonna tell her that I'm actually falling for her. Hell, she'll probably kill me for ruining her perfect plan to get Beck back. But I can't lie to her either. I'm a terrible liar, and she'll know for sure. Ugh, whaddo I do?
"Umm.. I-I don't really know" I stutter, and I can see the anger in her eyes when I tell her. The look that makes me wanna run for the rest of my life. The look she usually gives when she's about to take out her scissors. I shut my eyes, and take a deep breath.
Stay calm Tori..
Jade gets up and glares me down. She looks like she's about to either hit me or spit on me.. and neither sounds too good. I wait for her to do something.. anything. I jump when I feel her hand on my shoulder, and I look up at her confused as to why I'm not dead yet. Jade has her eyes closed, and she looks as if she's trying really hard to keep her anger under control. I melt at the sight in front of me. This is sooo unlike Jade, and it makes me feel so happy to think that I'm the reason she's changing..
"Vega.. I promised I'd try to disagree less with you.." she says through gritted teeth as she opens her eyes, and I smile at her.
This is so cute.
Ugh Tori. Stop thinking she's cute!
But she is..
"Vega.. I dunno what I'm doing wrong. I don't know how to make you happy.." she says sadly, and I quickly get up, cupping her cheek, and before I can stop myself, I kiss her. It doesn't take long for her to get out of shock and kiss me back. I pull back and rest my forehead against hers, as she opens her eyes to give me a confused look.
"You do make me happy Jade. You make me feel all those warm fuzzy feelings inside and no one's ever made me feel like this before.." I say, and she smiles sadly at me.
"Then why does it feel like you don't trust me.." she whispers, and I look away guiltily.
I honestly don't know if I fully trust Jade. I want to.. but it's hard when she keeps giving me these mixed signals. Sometimes she's really sweet and loving, but other times she can be really manipulative.. and I dunno if I'm ever feeling fully safe around her.
"I'm sorry.." I whisper, looking away from her eyes, and she nods understandingly. Before I can say anything else to her, she takes my hand and this time I squeeze it reassuringly.
"It's okay Tori. Don't worry about it.." she says sadly, and it makes me feel super guilty. But it's the truth.. and I can't change my feelings. All I know is that I can't stay away from Jade any longer. It not only hurts her, but it makes me feel so empty inside. "Do you wanna watch a movie or something? You can pick." she asks hopefully, and I nod.
"How about The Notebook?" I ask, but deep down I know she hates romantic cheesy movies, so I don't get my hopes up.
"Sure." she smiles, and I blink at her surprised, raising my eyebrows at her.
This has got to be a trick. She was mad at me just a few seconds ago..
"You get the movie ready, and I'll get the popcorn" she quickly says, before walking out of the room.
I'm still in shock for a while, but then I shake my head and turn on the TV across the bed. I start up the movie on Netflix, and I get cozy under Jade's covers, waiting for her to return. By the time she comes back she has a bowl of popcorn and a bottle of Dr. Pepper in her hands. I smile brightly at her, and she walks over to the bed, as she sits against the headboard, beside me. I resume the movie, and we watch it while stuffing our faces with the popcorn. The bowl's in between us, and Jade's sitting a bit far away from me.
"Thanks for letting me pick" I tell her as I gulp down the soda. She just smiles at me, and holds my hand before going back to look at the movie.
Halfway through the movie, I feel the side of my head being burned with a longing stare, and I turn to see that Jade's full focus is on me. She quickly turns back to the movie, and I sigh. I take the bowl of popcorn and scoot so that I'm right beside Jade, and I place the bowl on my thighs. I then lay my head down on her shoulder, and her face finally breaks into a proper smile, as she wraps an arm around my shoulder and squeezes me in close.
She mumbles a 'thanks', but it's so quiet that I'm not sure if I imagined it, or if it was real.
We continue watching the movie, and once it's done I go to turn the TV off and the lights back on.
"That was such a sad movie" I cry, as Jade chuckles at me.
"Aw you're such a baby" Jade laughs, and I smack her arm.
"Shut up. You barely watched it" I smirk, as I've noticed her eyes were on me throughout pretty much the whole movie.
"Well, you were way better to look at than that crappy movie." she blushes, and I throw a pillow at her for calling one of my favourite movies 'crappy'.
"Aww. Is the big bad Jade West going soft" I tease her, and she rolls her eyes, unable to hide her smile.
"Anyways, whatcha wanna do now?" she asks, and I shrug.
"Wanna just talk? I've been dating you for a week and yet I barely know the real Jade West" I playfully elbow her but she starts to look a bit uneasy.
"Umm.. s-sure" she stutters, and I raise an eyebrow but brush it off.
We start off the conversation with simple questions that we don't know about each other, but as we go on, we start to ask deeper questions.
"Why'd you hate me since the first day I met you?" I ask curiously. It's always been on the back of my mind. I mean, yeah I guess I can be pretty annoying at times, but I tried so many times to be her friend, even though she always pushed me away. Every time I thought I was getting closer to her one day, she'd treat me like chiz the next. And soon, I just gave up on the idea of us being friends altogether.
"Well.. the truth is, I had to work my ass off to get into Hollywood Arts. I had to go through three auditions, make new friends, and find my place in the school.. And then I hear a new girl gets in instantly, without having to audition, and she was already famous around the whole school without even having to step into it. And then you come into my group of friends, and everyone started to hate me because I treated you like shit. Even Beck took your side most of the time. Oh, and how do you think I'd feel if I saw the perfect new girl kiss my boyfriend?" She says in an annoyed tone, and I sit shocked with my mouth agape.
Woah.. that's.. a lot to take in. I never knew how much I affected her life when I came to HA.
"And since then, you've been getting all of the lead roles for everything, and I have to stand and watch, being second best all the fucking time." she finishes, and I know she doesn't mean to sound mad. It's probably just a reflex for her.
"Jade.. I'm so sorry. I had no idea how bad it was for you from your side. I guess I never stopped to think about it from your perspective" I apologise, and she shrugs.
"It's fine, I guess. I mean even though you pretty much took everything away from me.. I'm glad I met you Tori" she says softly, as she takes my hand, and I smile at her.
"I'm glad I met you too Jade"
"So, how come you never gave up trying to be my friend even though I was really rude to you?" she asks curiously, and I slightly chuckle.
"I guess I just wanted us to be cool since we're in the same group of friends. Plus, I found you pretty interesting despite all of the arguments we've had." I tell her honestly, and she raises an eyebrow at me.
"Interesting?"
"Yeah, I mean I know pretty much everything about Andre, Cat, Beck and Robbie, since we're all so close. But you? I barely know anything about you Jade. So yeah, I found the dark, mysterious girl who has a locker full of scissors pretty interesting" I chuckle, and she slightly smiles. We continue talking for what seems like hours, but honestly time flies past. Every now and then, Jade would look a bit uneasy at talking about certain stuff, so I quickly change the topic coz I don't want her to feel uncomfortable when she's around me. She doesn't talk about it further, but I see the grateful look in her eyes every time I switch the conversation.
She's mostly uncomfortable around the questions about her ex boyfriend, and her dad. I don't want to push her for answers, but I'm really hoping that one day she'll open up to me. Hopefully. I'd love to be the one she can talk to about this sort of stuff. As we're talking, Jade lets out a yawn, and I only notice now how tired her eyes are. There's dark circles underneath them, and her posture is slouched.
"Maybe we should call it a night. We have school tomorrow." I conclude, and she nods while yawning again. We get changed quickly, before Jade goes to turn off the lights. I lie down underneath the covers and sigh.
Jade's gonna try and get along with Beck tomorrow. As much as I don't want her to, all I want is for her to be happy. Even though I really wish I was the one who made her happy..
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Jade's POV:
'Beep! Beep! Beep!'
I groan as I wake up to the sound of my alarm and I quickly hit snooze, burying under the covers some more. Then, I feel shuffling in my bed, and I realise that Vega's still in bed with me.
I turn around to see her eyes slowly adjusting to the brightness, and then she gives me a sleepy smile that I find really cute.
"Morning" she mumbles, in her raspy morning voice.
"Must we go to school today?" I complain, as I bring the blanket over my head, and I can hear her faint chuckle. She grabs the blanket and pulls it away, causing me to scowl at her.
"Yes, we must. So get ready." She says, and quickly kisses me on my cheek before springing out of bed.
I could wake up next to Vega any day..
I groan, and pull the blanket back over my head, and close my eyes. I know it's too late for me to go back to sleep, but I just wanna think about how today's gonna be..
I know Vega told me that I have to get along with Beck so that we can at least sustain a friendship.. but I don't wanna be thinking about Beck right now. I guess, I'm kinda happy with what I have with Vega at the moment, and maybe I'll just postpone getting back together with Beck for a little while.
I hear the shower turn on, so I'm assuming she's in the bathroom. I get up with my regular morning frown on my face and I pick out my clothes for today. I wait for Vega to come out, which isn't too long, and then I go in to take a shower. As I'm in the shower, I do some deep thinking.
What. Showers are a great place to think without being interrupted.
I imagine how life would be if I never get back together with Beck, and instead stay with Vega. Of course it would never happen, since I love Beck.. and Vega would most likely say no.. but what if we were an actual couple doing.. well, couple things.
I guess that thought doesn't sound so repulsive to me anymore. I mean, it's a lot harder being with Vega than Beck, that's for sure. With Vega, it's never boring or easy. We're constantly bickering.. well I guess not as much anymore.. but she's just so complicated at times. Like yesterday. She would barely hold my hand after our date. And then when I ask her what's wrong, she says she doesn't know. And that's obviously such a huge fucking lie. I mean, she's not exactly the best liar.. but why does she feel the need to lie to me in the first place? It's not like I'm gonna kill her if she admits to the real reason why she doesn't wanna be close to me. She probably hates me too much to even hold my hand..
How do I get her to like me?
I shake my head at the thoughts, and turn the shower off. I wrap a towel around myself and see Vega on her phone, leaning against my desk. She's wearing a simply beige flowy shirt along with skinny jeans, and I smile at how she looks beautiful in anything she wears.
"Umm, hey" she says awkwardly, and I snap out of my thoughts as I realise that I've been caught staring. I go back to my morning scowl, ignoring her as walk over to my underwear drawer.
I really gotta start controlling my stares.. but it's pretty hard to do so when my girlfriend's super hot.. I can't believe I've never even noticed that before.
My back's facing Vega as I slip on some underwear, and then I decide on wearing a blue V-neck that exhibits plenty of cleavage, and a black skater skirt with black tights underneath. I smile as I look at myself in the mirror one last time, and then I turn around to see Vega with a big smirk on her face.
"What are you smirking at?" I raise an eyebrow at her, with an annoyed tone.
"Just.. the fact that I've got a smoking hot girlfriend" she casually says, and I blush.
Ugh. Why must my body do this to me?
"Whatever. Let's go downstairs" I quickly say, rushing to get out of the room. We walk downstairs, and I see that my mom has already left for work, so I start making some waffles for us. I tell Vega to go and wake Tyler up, and she nods before heading upstairs. Once I'm finished making the waffles, I set them on a plate and wait for Vega and the pre-turd to come down.
I wonder what's taking them so long..
Just as I'm thought that, I hear giggles as they comes downstairs.
Tyler.. giggling, in the morning???
Guess Vega's affected the whole West family.
"Whaddup grouch" he says, as he takes a seat in front of me. I give him an annoyed glare as I stuff my face with waffles, but Vega elbows him, giving him a look.
"Ugh, fine. Good morning, dear sister of mine" he says in a mocking tone, and I nearly spew out all of the contents in my mouth when I hear him attempt to say something decent to me. I start laughing at his scowling face, but then stop when I see Vega giving me the same look she gave to Tyler. It's one of those 'I'm disappointed in you' looks, and I absolutely hate it when Vega does it, mostly because it makes me feel really guilty. And I hate that feeling..
"Good morning" I mutter, looking down at my fork, and I hear Tyler snicker.
She's got us both whipped.
Vega smiles, as she sits beside me, and takes her plate of waffles. We eat in silence, with the occasional conversation here and there, but nothing out of the ordinary. When we're finished, I check the time and realise that I'll be late to school if I don't drop Tyler off quickly, so I say a quick 'see ya later' to Tori, and we get in our cars. Vega drives off, giving Tyler and I a little wave, and then she's out of sight. I sigh as I get into my car, Tyler following behind me.
Thankfully, Tyler's school is only about 5 minutes away from Hollywood Arts so it's not much of an inconvenience for me, but I still hate being in an enclosed space with him for even a minute. I drive in silence but then surprisingly the pre-turd opens his mouth. Which is pretty unusual as we never talk, unless we have to.
"Do you like Tori?" he asks out of nowhere, and I raise an eyebrow at him.
What sorta lame question is that?
I respond with an annoyed 'duh' and focus back on the road. Not even a minute later, he speaks up again.
"Do you like her more than Beck?" he asks curiously, and I dip my eyebrows slightly.
I've been asking myself this question all weekend, and I'm no closer to an answer as I was before..
"Um yeah. I guess" I half-lie, hoping he would just drop this topic. Luckily, we're only a few minutes away from his school. He slowly nods his head, before looking out the window.
That's it? He's not gonna explain why he's so interested in my love life all of a sudden??
"Why'd you ask?" I ask him, but he just shrugs his shoulders, and I roll my eyes as I continue driving. Shortly after, I pull up to his school and he grabs his bag from the back. I'm about to drive off, but he turns around to look at me.
"I like Tori more. She seems better for you than Beck." he simply says, before walking away to his school. I furrow my eyebrows and think more about what he said, but shake my head eventually.
He's only a little pre-turd. What does he know about relationships.
I quickly drive to school, speeding a little to get there on time, and then rush to my locker. I grab my books out of my locker, and head to my first class. I do a little internal victory dance when I hear the bell ring just as I enter the class. I mean, usually I wouldn't give a damn about my punctuality or attendance record, but I love Acting with Sikowitz. The guy's a nutball, but he's really entertaining and interesting at times. I see Vega sitting in her chair, talking to Cat, and I swear her face immediately brightens up when she sees me.
We literally saw each other this morning, yet she's like so happy..
She's probably just acting..
I sit beside her, and peck her lips very quickly before Sikowitz enters by climbing through the window.
See. Name one sane teacher that would do that shit!
The class flies by, along with the rest of the classes, and before I know it, the final bell before lunch rings. I let out a small sigh of relief and grab my stuff and walk out the door. I quickly grab my books out of my locker, and then head towards the Asphalt Café where I see everyone already sitting down, chatting and laughing. Vega looks up at me and smiles and I return it. My smile, however, disappears when I see her sitting really close to Beck. I'm sure she noticed it, because not even a second later, she quickly shifts a bit to her left.
How the fuck am I supposed to talk to him? It would just be so fucking random, and awkward for the both of us. 'Hey Beck, wanna be friends?' There's no way I'm gonna sound that desperate.
"Hey Jade!" Cat says in her high-pitched voice, and Beck's head shoots up, to stare at me. I simply sit down beside Tori, and grab her hand underneath the table. Again.
Honestly I dunno why I do it so much. I guess I just love the feeling of being close with her.
We go on about our weekends, and Cat tells us a story about her brother doing crazy shit. Same old shit.
"So, how's the newest couple doing?" Robbie asks us, and I roll me eyes at him, by default. His voice just irritates me.
"We're doing alright." Vega says happily, and they smile at us. Seriously? Alright? No one's gonna believe us if she says that we're doing alright.
I decide to lift up our linked hands from underneath the table, and 'scratch' my nose, still holding a firm grip on Vega's hand. I then place our linked hands on the table, and go back to eating my lunch. The first to notice is Beck, and I smirk when I see the look of disappointment in his face.
He must really regret this break up.
The next to notice is Cat. "Aww, you guys are so cute!" she squeals, and I simply shrug my shoulders, acting like it's a usual thing.
Once we're all finished eating, we all get ready to head to our classes. I peck Vega's lips, before walking to my next class. As I'm walking however, I hear my name being called by a familiar deep voice. Beck.
"Jade! Wait up!" he shouts, and I turn around to see him jogging up to me. I roll my eyes, and I'm about to just keep walking, but he grabs my arm, making me stop on my tracks.
"What?" I snap, while jerking away my arm.
So much for being friendly..
"Okay.. I'm just gonna say this straight forwardly.." he says, and I impatiently motion for him to continue.
What could he possibly want?
"Jade" he sighs, and he holds my hand in his. It just feels so.. wrong compared to holding Vega's hand. Tori's hand is so soft and gentle, but Beck's is so rough. It just goes to show how the little things make a huge difference when you have to choose between two amazing people..
"Jade, I-I miss us. Beck and Jade. The power couple in Hollywood Arts. The couple who was supposedly gonna last forever, and have their happy ever after. Like the ones in movies. I love you Jade. And deep down, I know you love me too. We had something really special, and I thought that I could let you go.. but I-I cant. Seeing you with Tori just makes me feel like I made the stupidest mistake ever when I didn't talk you out of dumping me. I even tried to have a girl over last night, but it just didn't feel right, and I told her to leave. Wanna know why?" he asks me, but I'm too surprised to respond.
"Coz she isn't you Jade. She isn't the dark yet sweet girl that I know and fell in love with. She didn't make me feel like I'm the happiest guy on earth.. and that's coz only one person can make me feel like that. And that one person is you, Jade." he finishes, and I stand there shocked from his revelation.
I really dunno what to say to him. All I want to do right now is run away, so that I can think about it. It's just.. too much to handle right now. He's nervously waiting for an answer and then suddenly, we hear the bell ring, signalling for us to go to our classes.
"I-I gotta go" I blurt out, and am about to run away from him, but he calls my name again.
You can't run away from this Jade. You gotta face it eventually..
Things are just.. too complicated right now. I mean this is what I wanted to happen, right? I honestly didn't expect Beck to come to his senses so quickly, but still. I should just tell him that I want him back.
But Vega.. I really like her too. And I don't want to be just friends with her. She's made me feel so special in just a week's time, and I don't think I'm ready to let her go just yet. But then Beck tells me his big heartfelt speech, and he's just so sweet to me and.. Ugghhh. I think I'm gonna fucking pass out with all this relationship drama.
What the actual fuck am I gonna do?
"Jade?" Beck interrupts my thoughts, with a worried look on his face.
"Umm.. Beck.. I-I.." I stutter, not knowing what the hell I'm gonna tell him.
"Jade, you don't have to tell me an answer straight away. I know you're still with Tori and I don't want to hurt anyone.. it's just.. I felt like I had to tell you how I truly feel.." he tells me, and I slowly nod.
"Beck, c-can you just give me some time and space? I need to sort out my feelings and I don't wanna hurt either of you." I tell him, in a very quiet tone, and he nods understandingly.
"Of course" he says, and starts walking away. I watch his back as he walks away, and I want to fucking punch a wall right now because I'm so fucking frustrated. I like both Beck and Vega, and I have no clue what I'm gonna do..