12 | It Sent
Song: Renegades
By: X Ambassadors
August 10, 2019
When I woke up, I felt a strong arm wrapped around my waist and stomach. I could feel him breathing on my shoulder, sending shivers down my spine. I tried to move and get up and he had me pinned down.
Then he let out a groan and lifted up his arm. I got up and just looked at him. He started to open his eyes and rubbed them since it's 6:25. And he just stared at me as well.
I didn't smile or anything and he didn't either. I finally walked out of the room and went downstairs to the bathroom.
When I came out, I went back up to my room and get an outfit. Gray was still in my bed and looking at the ceiling until I appeared again when he was just staring.
I didn't make eye contact with him when I came in just went straight to my closet. I heard him get up and I could hear his footsteps getting closer and closer until I felt his presence behind me as he wrapped his arms around my waist.
At this point, I have to ask.
I move away from him and look him in the eyes. "Gray?" I said. I need to be serious.
He looked at me and knew that he didn't anything wrong. "Yeah?"
Just say it.
"I don't think best friends sleep with each other." There I said it.
He looked confused. But then his expression change when he started to walk out of the room. I followed as he went down the stairs. Is he leaving?
But before he went through the front door to his car, he turned back to look at me and he said, "I know. But I wanted to." And he closed the door behind him. Leaving me in an empty house.
***
(Block 2)
Gray wasn't in algebra this morning which worried me.
All of the English was pretty boring. We had a reading day today. But then I got a text from JT. I hid my phone in my book so the teacher wouldn't see.
JT: Wanna go shopping after school? We can buy new outfits for the party.
Me: Yeah sure! I'd love to.
JT: Will Grayson be joining us?
Oh, right I forgot about him.
Me: Um no I don't think so.
JT: oh okay.
The bell rang and I managed to be the first one out the door.
***
Shopping with JT
We were currently trying on outfits. We were taking turns and she was changing now. I haven't found anything that looked good here or it just didn't fit me. Since my body shape isn't really the normal size for these clothes. I tried to keep a positive face on the whole time and it worked for the most part.
She came out wearing this beautiful sundress that laced up in the back. Which is perfect because it's still August and pretty hot. Seeing her in that dress gave me chills and I don't know why. When she spun in it, it made me smile for real and she seemed really happy wearing it.
"How does it look?" She said, smiling. It fit so perfectly on her, like a glove on the top and so loose on the bottom (because of the dress part duh).
"Amazing," that just slipped out, I promise. And the way I said it, ew, what's wrong with me today?
I guess that came out as a mumble to her cause she didn't hear it, she was still waiting for my response. Thank God. "It's cute," I said. "You should totally buy it."
"Yeah?" She said, looking down at it, getting a good feel of it. "I think so too." And she walked back to change out of it.
As I waiting for her by the wall in the back of the store, I saw this dress. It was hanging on the wall like it was on display. It was this blue-ish grey color all over. It looked loose and comfy. The front was like a halter top. It didn't look too heavy or too light.
I leaned forward from leaning on the wall and started walking towards it. When I closed to it, I noticed that there was some pattern on it that made me love it even more. It had these dark blue flowers threaded into it with little bee's flying around them.
It actually looked like it was my size for once. I took it off the hook it was hanging on and held it in my arms like it was a baby.
"You gonna try that on, Noah?" I heard behind me. I turned around and it was JT, holding her dress with one arm and the other on her hip. I fully turned her way and looked down at the dress. "Yeah. I am." I said. I looked back up and let out a squeal of excitement. I never do that and I haven't worn a dress since my mom's funeral. So like 8 years ago.
I walked over to the dressing room and closed the door behind me. I took off my shirt and unzipped the back of the dress. I slip it on and it felt good. Not too tight and it looked so good on me, on my body.
But I couldn't reach the back to zip it up. Then I heard a knock on the door. "Hey, how does it look?" JT asked.
"Actually could you come in here for a sec?" I asked, hoping she would say yes, sure, or of course.
She didn't say anything just came in. I went ahead and asked, "Could you zip up the back for me?" Once again she didn't say a word just did what I asked.
As she stepped closer to me I could feel her presence behind me. She put a hand on my shoulder and slowly zipped up the back of the dress. When she reached the top, she put her other hand on my waist. We both looked in the mirror, I was looking at the dress and then I glanced over at her and she was looking at me up and down. "What do you think?" I asked. She looked up at me and smiled while giggling. She looked down so I wouldn't have seen her blushing but I did. She stepped away and said, "it looks great." She seemed quieter than usual but I ignored it, for now, I was more focused on the dress. "Well, I'm buying it," I stated. "Oh, could you unzip it for me?"
She looked back at me and did what I asked. But the next thing she did, I didn't ask for. She stayed in the dressing room with me. I took off the dress and hanged it back up on the hanger and put my shirt back on. When I looked back at her, she was smirking. I don't know though. There's nothing special here. But I felt my cheeks heat up so I covered them with my hands, I didn't wanna make eye contact with her. I felt so embarrassed. Why? Because I don't like how my body looks and I don't like people looking at my body either.
I don't know why I didn't ask her to leave in the first place. It's like a part of me wanted her... To stay.
I felt a hand rest on my shoulder and I knew it was JT. She said, "You don't have to be embarrassed, Noah." I looked up at her and she was smiling. She grabbed my dress and her's and started to walk out of the changing room until she said, "And besides, you look cute when you blush so don't worry about it." And she walked off to the check out point.
After her comment, I blushed even more. Or was it a compliment? It was, it was.
***
As I drove us back to my house, we talked about a lot of things. But then we became silent for a sec. I started to remember what happened to Gray and me, earlier. But I'm still confused about the whole thing. I can't call it a fight cause' I just made a comment he stormed out all mad. But then he said he did it because he wanted to. Like what does that mean?
"Hey?" JT said, pulling me out of my thoughts.
It kinda startled me at first but then I calmed down and responded. "Yeah?"
I saw that she put her phone down and turned it off. "What's on your mind." It didn't sound like a question, it was like a demand.
I cleared my throat and denied it. "Nothing. Nothing at all."
"Noah that's bullsh*t. Something's on your mind and I know it." JT said. She really wanted to know.
I took a deep breath and let it out like a big sigh. I pulled over on the side of the road, put it in the park and slowly turned to face her.
"Take your time." She said. "I won't interrupt you."
I nodded and started, "So Gray and I have had two fights this week... Well, actually I would call this a fight. I'll start from last night. After I got home from dropping you off, he showed up at my house to watch Netflix. I took a shower and then he fell asleep on my couch. I kinda woke him up and led him to my bedroom." Her eyebrows raised but I confirmed. "No it wasn't like that, it's just you don't wanna sleep on my couch, it's not comfy. So I let him sleep on my bed and I slept on the floor. But then I woke up in my bed with him. Luckily my clothes were still on so we didn't do anything but he was like cuddling with him...." I stopped but then continued. "I got up from him and looked in the mirror and then he came up behind me. That's was when I said to him 'i don't think best friends sleep with each other' and he stormed off." I explain.
It leaned back in my seat and just closed my eyes. "Maybe he likes you..." My eyes popped open in disbelief. "No that can't be possible. Who would like someone like me? No one that's who." I said.
I heard her sigh. We just sat there in silence until I started the car back up and got back on the highway. "I would." I heard her whisper.
I pretended like I didn't heard it and looked away and focused on getting home.
***
It was about 7:30 and we just spent the rest of the day playing Mario Kart which I beat her in every time. But then I wonder if I had to drive her home.
"Hey, do you want me to drive you home?" I asked her.
"Oh no. My brother is picking me up after his football practice is over. It goes until 8:00 pm." She confirmed.
I nodded. And walked over to use the bathroom. When I was done and now washing my hands I heard I male's voice come from the living room. It didn't sound like Grayson but it sounds familiar to me.
I dried my hands off and opened the door to see the art class douchebag, sitting on the couch with his dirty ass. The one and only, Mereck.
I approached him and JT while they were laughing about something. The wood creaked as I stepped on it and the noise caught his attention. He turned his head and his smile turned into a smirk. "Mereck?" I said with a straight face. "I see you finally learned my name huh, shorty?" He said, trying to sound all cool. "By the way, how's your lip?" He asked. He bent down to look at it but I covered it with my hand. "C' mon let me see it." He demanded. I moved my hand away, he finally stood back up and said, "It's looking better."
"Whatever," I said, walking away at least from him. I heard JT asked him how do we know each other and he told her we have an art class together.
I got to the fridge and got out a soda. They both came in and sat on the bar stools. They were talking about something but I didn't listen until JT was speaking for both of us because she said: "we". "Yeah, that's why we went shopping for the party."
I started making a grilled cheese sandwich for myself but then Mereck had to ask. "Whatcha making?"
"Grilled cheese," I said, blankly to him.
"Do you mind making two?" He said. I looked over at JT and she had that face. The puppy dog face. "Please." He said.
When he said that I just looked at him.
Without saying a word I finished making mine and started making two more for them. I offered them chips on the side, JT said no but Mereck pretty much ate the whole bag, to be honest.
We all are together and had some ice cream after for dessert.
After that, Mereck wanted to call it a night. "I think we should get going JT before mom gets worried." He chuckled.
"Yeah, you're probably right." She turned to me and hugged me. I wasn't expecting a hug or anything. She pulled away and followed Mereck to the front door. He opened the door up for it to get through and after she did, Mereck said, "See ya tomorrow in art." Then left.
I smiled to myself and went to go get ready for bed.
***
It's now 10:10 pm, I've been laying in bed for an hour, listening to music. Then the thought of Gray came up. I wonder what he's doing. I stopped the music from playing and went to our messages. I don't know what I was thinking at this point. I guess I was still half asleep.
I typed in "do you like me?" But didn't send it. It's just what I was thinking. "This is stupid," I said to myself. I set my phone down on my bed but as soon as the phone left my hand, it made the sound. My eyes widened as I sat up to see...
It sent...
It. Sent.
Then I saw under my text
Me: do you like me?
Seen
He already read it.
He started typing but I immediately turned off my phone and set it face down on my nightstand.
I didn't want to see it, I didn't want to see his response.
I turned over to my side and closed my eyes to try and go to sleep.
Soon I did.
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