2 Weeks Later.
LISA
People fall in love and get back around the yard by switching the light that comes from the sun. But where did my sad moon hide? It hid among the stars, feeling and vibrating for me to search by my own eyes for an answer.
An idiot. An idiot that fell in love with someone who didn't share the same clarity.
Never in my life did I think it would end up this way..
I pushed the pillow away from me and felt the pain threaten for my tears to fall. It all became unbearable. The pain I was feeling, could last me a lifetime. Maybe a jar full of tears.
"Lisa?". Chaeyoung knocked on the door.
"Lisa, don't do this to yourself". I could hear the sadness that laced against her voice.
I didn't answer.
"Lisa-ya? I brought you food". She knocked again but I sighed before slowly muttering, "I-I don't want food..".
"You can't waste the precious food that I brought you!". She stopped knocking, and with a sigh left.
I heavily breathed. Just directing my heart to beat more calmly, but nothing inside of me ever budged. The shade of the moon masked my red puffy cheeks. It was tragic for life to write a depressing story for me.
Ae all go through the same ride. Look, meet, tension, fall in love and repeat.
So why was my story so unreal?
I swallowed back the tears but they fell anyway, like a waterfall; they pushed my anxiety among my face, as I shook with sadness.
The moon's light entranced me as I cried, even the wind's hustle tried to reach out to my mess. But I was very disappointed. And maybe it was me who was very wrong for liking such a precious human being. It was the second time in this month, that I felt so broken. And time didn't give me any chance to regret it.
Only my beating heart rasped against the ceiling.
"S-she will never be yours". I whispered to myself with a smile.
JENNIE
The sky is dappled by the cloud, a beauty over our motley crew. So I rest on my back and let my eyes gaze upward, enjoying the nothing that is everything. The puzzle of being complete has left me so broken. Lisa's words made my heart depart from my mind.
Constantly everything inside of me ached for her.
She became the silver acceptance - written over the skies and traced against my milky skin.
It's funny how I've missed her all of these years but kept my stubbornness to me as a solution for my heart's wild beating when she's around. The skies reached my shaky figure that was inside the wind, feeling trapped and so locked for feeling something I wasn't supposed to feel.
What did my heart storm?
And these emotions...
These emotions that I craved for her..
They became the shutter sound of glass. Eyes all puffy from not sleeping, and here I am.
Sitting in my car, gripping the steering wheel like a drunk person when I was soberer than any person who walked by.
I slowly opened the door of my car, feeling my insides collapse with the thunder that shook against the sky. I only wanted answers, I didn't need to be the idiot who pushes someone by being cold or being silent anymore.
I did it enough for two weeks straight.
I knocked on the door, as the sound of footsteps fascinated the ringing in my ears.
"Hello? Oh my god, Ruby?". The girl, who I may recall from the FaceTiming, Rosé. Spoke and ushered me in with a bright smile.
She's even more beautiful in real life. I must admit.
"H-hey". I muttered with a slow smile.
"You have been crying?". She pouted and pulled me closer to her as I nodded. The sweet woman rubbed my back as I closed my eyes. Neglecting the pain inside of me in the hug.
Even though she was a stranger, but I could feel and sense how caring she was.
"W-where is Lisa?". I asked once she pulled back from the hug.
She sighed, "Lisa's inside her room. Somehow she was refusing the food I made for her, and even locked the door". I nodded.
Chaeyoung then gave me an apologetic smile before motioning for me to follow her. "Come, I will lead you to her room". I nodded and followed her towards the stairs.
The house was big enough for a family. It was all dolled up with pictures. Frighteningly, I knew it was taken by Lisa. She has always given out good work. No wonder why she was working now for one of the best companies in Seoul.
But I wonder why Lisa stays and lives here alone.
Chaeyoung was about to knock but I stopped her. She nodded and moved away so I can knock. I took a deep breath, feeling my insides rebuild with anxiety and fear.
I kept on knocking. A few moments later the door slammed open. Startled I crashed back, "Chaeyoung haven't I told you I don't want to eat?!—". Lisa's madness shook through the hallway.
Once her eyes met mine, they softened but then a huge trip of guilt cruised through my chest once she looked away.
"W-why are you here Jennie?". She turned back to sit on the end of her bed. Allowing me to enter her room, which was lit with the moon.
Eyes not meeting mine, but hell I felt like a coward. A coward standing in front of her sweet bully. But could I just stop my loud heart right now? It's too late.
"I-I came to talk to you..". I muttered before entering her room, for the first time.
Chaeyoung held her thumbs up for me encouragingly and then left down the stairs, giving us more privacy.
"I don't think there is anything for us to talk about Jen..". The nickname slipped from her tongue so easily. Somehow it came out so easy that I felt my legs weaken with the pain I've been feeling too.
"Of course there is—". She stopped me and stood in front of me with so much anger, that my skin shivered and started to crawl under her gaze. Lisa stood back up with so much frustration, evident on her face.
"I'm sure as hell, there is nothing for us to talk about—". I stopped her by stepping closer, her breath hitched in her throat. "When.?".
She raised her eyebrow confusedly as I asked, "When did you start falling in love with me?".
My question seemed to startle her, but she looked back in my eyes with so many emotions, that I felt my heart burst at the lack of contact between us.
"Ever since we were kids Jennie..". I was taken aback by her answer but she continued by her slow remarks, "Ever since we became friends. I never wanted to lose contact with you..". She scrunched her nose cutely.
"B-but we were only kids..". I interfered.
"Love doesn't have limits Jennie. Love doesn't wait for you to be a teenager so you can gossip about it to your friends and all.. it's none of your concern, don't worry". The harshness came back to her voice.
My heart became heavy for a second.
"Lisa I-..".
"Don't. Don't say it out of pity!". She warned.
"But it's the truth Lisa.. I care about you..".
"You didn't care about even sending me a message, but rather chose to give me this silent treatment". I swallowed, knowing she was right.
I looked away as her hoarse voice became so low and came back to the barking sound. "Tell me now.. How the fuck do you expect me to know that you care?".
"I'm here now, I think that should matter". I whispered.
Lisa shrugged her head in a disagreeing manner before speaking, "It shouldn't matter when I'm only a game for you to play Jennie..". She kept on shrugging her head while painting the pain through the air, "One time you make me feel so special, and as someone you truly need".
"The next thing I know, you're being cold..". She looked away as tears shattered through her eyes. "I just wanna know..".
I bit my lip in a motion to not cry, but I felt weak; Under her gaze, I felt so weak.
"What am I to you..?".
"What am I to you, Jennie?—". I closed my eyes before whisper- screaming, "Everything!".
I shakily started breathing, clutching my chest as I speak. "I..I.. You think it was all easy for me too?".
I blinked rapidly through the nostalgia of suffering, "You think it was that easy.. for me?".
"For liking someone and then leaving them to achieve the harsh dream. That I never wanted to be a part of, is truly hard you know..".
"W-what do you mean by liking someone?". Confusion sparkled from her big brown eyes.
I bit my lip before answering, "You will know soon". I answered honestly with a sigh, feeling myself weaken but smile faintly. "Now give me a chance will ya?".
Lisa cracked a smile despite the hurt that rang from her face.
"I-I don't mean to whine about my feelings Jennie, but that's the truth". I pulled her closer to me before looking deep in her eyes, "Now don't be eager, I will call you soon". I winked and pushed her away, so I can swiftly walk away.
"Hey, where are you going?". Lisa pouted.
"I'm coming back to you baby, I promise". I winked at Lisa, who blushed.
"And I will wait for you..". She said back.
And her words made me feel as if young me was born again; born against her gaze.
I smiled and nodded before leaving.
Perhaps, I may share what I left behind for years now.