SONG JI-WON'S POV
"No." My father snaps sharply, making such a burning eye contact with me that I avert my gaze. "Absolutely not."
"You're not even bothering to think about it." I say defensively, not giving up so easily.
"There's no thinking needed. You're simply being incredibly foolish and blind to reality. I don't want to hear any more of this nonsense." He says in a warning tone. His expression almost scared me.
"Honey, imagine being in her position." My mother insisted, thankfully siding with me. I wouldn't be able to even bring up the subject of college to my dad alone.
"If I were in her position, I wouldn't let some stupid boy ruin my future!" He yelled, making me flinch.
"It's not just about Jungkook, I have more self respect than that." I mutter quietly. He ignores me.
"We've had her future planned for years, we've discussed university endless times, and now she wants to change everything! And for what? For a worthless, undeserving young man who's dragging her away from everything we've raised her for."
"Don't talk about him like that!" I exclaim, clenching my fists. "You don't know him, and you've even never tried to."
"Why do you defend him so much?" He asks, stepping closer to me furiously. "I know exactly what's going on with you two. You let yourself get distracted, with something as unnecessary as romance, at an extremely crucial time in your life, after a lifetime of hard work and discipline. You're throwing it away to impress on boy."
"You can't make every decision for me! I'm 18, I'm an adult, and yet you still want to control me!" I yell, not even attempting to deny things anymore. My mom puts a hand on my arm to warn me, but I ignore her.
"I've spent those 18 years preparing you for a future worthy of honor, you ungrateful child." He said. "Until you're mature enough to accept reality and put your foolishness behind you, you are no adult. Stop pretending to be for your own convenience."
"I'm so sick of this!" I shriek, shaking from rage. "I'm not letting you ruin the new life I created for myself. This is the happiest I've ever been, and you want to take it all away from me because you're selfish. All you want is for me to succeed. That's why you ended up like you did, because you never understood that there's more to life than success."
"Ji-won, that's enough," my mother interjects, not taking my outburst any further. I continue anyway, words spilling out of my heart.
"You have a wife and a daughter you love you, but you're blind to that reality! All you care about is my goddamn grades and my goddamn education!" I yell, shrugging my mom's grip off me. "You never ask me about anything but school. You don't even know me, and yet you want to pretend that I'm yours to control, and I'm sick of it."
A brutal silence falls over us. I try to keep my breathing collected and slow, but my heart is beating too fast to allow me to hide.
"You can't possibly understand how disappointed I am in you." My father says in a low, hateful tone. A pain sparks in my chest, and tears spring in my eyes.
I've worked my entire life, wasted my only childhood, given all my effort to keep up the perfect image, to be the perfect daughter, all to hear that.
I couldn't hold back a sob before holding my breath to collect myself.
"Do whatever you want. Go ahead, waste all the opportunity and potential you have. Give it up for a bit of fun. You'll regret it all one day." He says finally, turning and walking out of my room, down the hall, and into his own. He slams his door with passion, and the echo rings in the air. My mother and I remain silent, and only then do I allow myself to break down. She holds me close as I cry onto her shoulder, gripping my bedsheets tightly.
"I-I'm sorry..." I mutter quietly in between sobs.
"I want you to know that you didn't do anything wrong, alright?" She says soothingly, pulling away to look me in the eye. "But you can't lash out at your father like that. He genuinely wants the best for you."
I sigh and don't nod, but continue listening.
"You have many good points in this whole argument, and he should really try to be a more accepting father to you, but he is right about some things."
"I'm not seeing that part at the moment." I mutter.
"I'd love to have you close to home, but if you're really just staying for family and friends, you should rethink..." She says softly. My heart sinks. I thought she was with me on this one.
"I want you to make a decision you won't regret, whatever that may be. Whatever university feels right to you, you should attend. But just remember, before you became close to Jungkook, even Hoseok wasn't holding you back."
"That's not true." I say defensively. "It's the time. I didn't realize how desperately I wanted to stay in Seoul until the time of leaving came close. I'm scared, mom. And look, we're in the capital of South Korea. Big things happen here. I already live in an opportunity center, why should I leave?"
She closes her eyes and sighs. It seems that everyone is just so stressed out with me. "What's so wrong about feeling attached? That's what makes us human." I say quietly, hoping she'll understand me.
She simply pats my shoulder. "You're the smartest person know. You'll figure everything out." She kisses my forehead before walking out of my room, shutting the door softly behind her.
Well that was a productive conversation. My situation is still exactly the same, but at least I figured out one thing.
Everyone is tired of my bullshit, so I'll need to decide on my own. I don't need acceptance from my parents, and I don't need my friends in the way. I just need to decide things for myself.
I flop backward on my bed and laugh. For myself, when have I done anything for myself...
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JUNG HOSEOK'S POV
"The fuck is wrong with you?" I ask, eyebrows furrowed in a confused concern, as I watch Ji-won giggle hysterically in her bed. Laying there all alone, staring at the ceiling, laughing like a crackhead while tears stream down her cheeks.
She flinches when she hears me, tries to pull a serious face, but obviously can't help it, because her grin comes back almost instantly and she starts wheezing again.
"No wonder your mom called me over." I mutter, walking over and sitting on her bed. Mrs. Song had called and told me it was best for Ji-won to have some company right now, after a rough conversation with her father, as she put it. I rushed over here without further question.
"Hobi," She says, chuckling more softly now and regaining her breath. "I was just thinking about everything, and it's hilarious, really. I can't believe it took me so long." She explains.
"Are you feeling okay?" I ask, leaning over and touching her forehead.
She shooed my hand away and sat up, a smile dancing on her lips. "I'm fine. I just finally made a decision, and I feel pretty good about myself."
My eyes widened. "A decision?? On your own? Did I hear you correctly?"
"Mhm." She says, sighing in a relieved way.
"So..." I say, my smile fading to a serious expression. "What did you, uh, decide?" I ask, although I already know what this is about. University.
She was silent for a few moments, looking me right in the eye. My heart picked up its pace, and as greedy as I know it was, I wished over and over in my head that she would say she was staying.
I can't lose her. I would lose myself.
"Hobi." She whispers, snapping me out of my thoughts. She had leaned in when I zoned out, and I flinch from seeing her suddenly so much close to me.
"Yeah?" I reply, my voice almost shaking. I don't want her to see how scared I am. Please... say she chose Seoul...
She put her hand over mine and squeezes, a small smile spreading over her lips. "We're in the goddamn capital of South Korea. Why should I leave this land of opportunity?"
My heart starts beating even faster, and the corners of my lips instantly curl upward.
"I belong here. I don't know why I've been trying to pretend that I was too good for Seoul, when really Seoul is too good for me. I can't leave my home."
I scoff a chuckle, and another, before I start laughing hard like she had been. Without warning, I lunge forward and attack her in a huge hug, and she screams from shock before she starts giggling with me.
"THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!" I screech as I embrace her tighter, burying my face in her shoulder. I don't want her to see me tearing up with relief, but she might already be able to tell by the way my voice shakes.
"It's not just for you, so don't get too cocky." She teases, hugging me back. "Thank you too."
"For what?"
We pull away to be able to look at each other, and she chuckles when she sees my tears. She pulls her sleeve over her fist and leans over to wipe them away, and I flush with embarrassment as I laugh and smack her hand away.
"For being my best friend, for being supportive, for existing. If it weren't for you, I honestly might've gone to China or Japan."
I smirk. "Don't tell your parents or Jungkook or Haru that part." She giggles and pushes me, and I kick her in return. It turns into a little play fight, and it's such a relief to know that this won't be one of our last.
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SONG JI-WON'S POV
These days, walking through the halls at school feels so much more significant. It's not just going to class, it's going to one of the last high school classes of my life. I feel a lump grow in my throat every time I walk into Ms. Lee's classroom. After being so close to her for 4 years, I've almost felt like she'd mentor me forever. I wish she could. I'll miss her like crazy, but I know we'll keep in touch. We never had a classic teacher-student relationship anyway.
Today, 1 week before the last day of high school, I walk through the halls with heightened focus, and seemingly heightened emotions. Why do I always feels like crying these days? I'm not even on my period. I wonder if I'm the only one panicking for graduating. Not because I'm worried I won't make it in the real world, but because I'll miss this routine. This life. Because the next chapter will be entirely different.
Everyone else seems beyond excited for the last day. Everyone runs through the halls as if to rush through the last week. I know not the only nerd in this whole goddamn school, there are countless other tryhard teachers' pets, but even they seem to be happy about senior year coming to a close. I feel a little isolated, like I'm the only person here who just wants to stop time and be stuck. I want to be stuck in this May, be stuck in this high school and stuck with my boyfriend and best friend and even parents. But that's not how it works, and in 7 days everything is going to change.
I make my way to my locker and try to swallow any nostalgic feelings down. None of them matter anyway. I work my combination slowly, since I know it's also one of the last times I'll put it in. Stupid Ji-won.
When I open it, a paper suddenly falls out and onto the floor in front of me. I furrow my eyebrows, confused, and reach down to pick it up. It's an envelope.
I look around, not sure what to do with it. Someone probably slipped it into my locker. I check the back, and to my surprise, it's addressed to Jungkook.
I chuckle to myself. It's probably a love note for him and a hate note to me at the same time. This wouldn't be the first one. Hoes mad all over the place.
I then realize the envelope has already been opened. Becoming increasingly confused, I just take the letter out and finally read it.
𝘑𝘦𝘰𝘯 𝘑𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘬𝘰𝘰𝘬,
𝘊𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘵 𝘚𝘦𝘰𝘬𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘜𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘺.𝘞𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘶𝘴 𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘩𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘰𝘧 20xx.
My breath is caught before I can even gasp. My eyes widen as I read the opening lines over and over, gripping the paper tighter with each passing second. My shock quickly turns into an explosion of happiness, and I can't hold back a scream of joy. People start staring but I hardly notice them, since I now have only one goal on my mind: find Jungkook.
We're both headed to 8th period history, so without further hesitation I take off at a sprint down the hall. I almost trip and die as I speed down the stairs, but I'm not fazed in the slightest. This adrenaline of excitement is proving to be very powerful.
I burst through the doors to outside and run in the direction of Mrs. Lee's portable. As I approach, I finally see Jungkook walking up the ramp to the classroom, and my smile widens.
"JUNGKOOK!!!!" I exclaim at the top of my lungs as I charge at him. He turns around and has no time to prepare as I pounce on him in a huge hug. He screams from the shock and tries not to drop me as I wrap my arms around his neck and legs around his waist.
"I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!" I squeal, burying my face into his neck.
He starts laughing and embraces me back tightly. "You saw it?" He asks excitedly. "Wasn't it clever of me to slip it in your locker?"
"You're going to fucking college! I never thought I'd see an acceptance letter for you!" I tease. He instantly drops me and I yell as I grab him to catch myself. We both laugh and I kick his shin as he calls me an asshole.
"Seriously, thank you. I wouldn't be going anywhere if you didn't tutor me all year. I owe you so much." He says, looking me right in the eye, the smile not leaving his lips.
"I can think of a few ways you could make it up." I reply with a small smirk. He chuckles and takes a step closer to me, cocking his head to the side.
"Oh really?"
I giggle and shove him away before his hands can reach my waist. He walks toward me again playfully and we chase each other around.
"Alright that was adorable but I have a lesson to begin. Get in my classroom." Mrs. Lee interrupts with a laugh. She winks at me as I walk in and I smile.
Hobi walks into the classroom a couple seconds after me and jogs over to my seat. "What was all that about?" He asks curiously, apparently having seen the whole thing.
"Ask him." I reply happily, jutting my chin in Jungkook's direction.
He finally doesn't hesitate to go approach him. "So, is there some kind of good news?" Hoseok asks casually. Jungkook grins.
"I'm going to college."
A smile spreads over Hobi's lips. "Are you serious?"
"What, you didn't think I could?" He replies.
"Of course not, your the biggest dumbass I know." Hobi says. Just as I'm about to roll my eyes at their pointless fighting, they both start laughing and Jungkook punches Hoseok's shoulder.
They're joking this time?
"Shut up, I know your parents bribed you into University of Seoul. There's no way your head ass could get into that school." Jungkook jokes, and they continue talking playfully as friends.
I can't hold back a small smile at them getting along. They're on their way to being close again, I can already tell. Mrs. Lee directs the class to settle down, and Jungkook and Hobi do a bro hug before separating to their seats.
For one of the rare times all year, I'm zoning out in class, just thinking.
It's selfish to want to be stuck. We're all starting completely new academic paths, even Jungkook, and their friendship is developing again. Things should be ever-changing, that's what keeps life interesting and beautiful.
So I decided then and there, I don't want to be stuck. I'm going to see where life takes me.