Jennie's POV
A week had passed after that night. After the night that she dropped me home, I never saw her again. I tried to call her but she wasn't answering and wasn't replying on my messages. I went to Sehun's house, but he told me that he never came back.
I started to felt nervous. Where are you Lili? What happened to you? Did she left me? Did she really said goodbye that night?
Fvck Lili! Why?!
I was full of regrets, I should never let her go that night. I wish I stopped her.
You're so dumb Jennie!
After another week, we were able to come back to our old house. The bed where Lili got imprisoned was the one I'm using. I've been crying for one week. I sent her a message every second, but didn't received a single reply.
It damn hurts Lili, do you know that?!
Mom and Kai started to notice what's happening to me. They tried to ask me but I'm not in the mood to tell them the whole story that will surely hurt me again.
I was walking at the hallway when I saw a tall girl walking not so far from me. Is that Lili?
I walked faster, because she has larger steps than mine.
"Lili!" I yelled, trying to face her to me.
"What was it Miss?" the girl said when I faced her to me.
She's not Lili.
"What happened Jennie? Why're you chasing her?" Nayeon asked.
"Nothing." I answered.
"Nothing? Hello, if it was nothing, you would not act like that. You think I didn't noticed? You're obviously depressed." Nayeon said with worry.
I didn't answer her and continue to walk.
Do you know how hurt I am right now Lili? I'm getting crazy.
I shook my head. No Jennie, you know what situation she was in. This was so hard for her so be an understanding girlfriend. I won't give on her, she didn't tell me that we're done. I'll wait for her.
The only things that i wanted to know that you were just here, that you just needed time, that you'll come back, I promise that I'll wait.
I felt a tear flowed down my cheek, and I quickly wiped it. I'm so annoyed with myself. Why am I even crying? Lili wasn't that kind of person, she won't leave me just like that.
You look so stupid Jennie, you're so ugly now. I said in my mind when I saw my reflection.
"Jen?" someone said and I'm sure that it was Jisoo.
"Hm?" I answered trying to sound okay.
"What happened?" she asked worriedly.
"Nothing." I answered.
"You says the opposite one." Jisoo said then she suddenly hugged me.
"You don't have to say it. I know that you just needed a hug." she said that caused me to cry.
After that day, everything became better, maybe. It was still the same, I haven't heard a thing about Lili. I kept on calling and sending her messages but she didn't respond. Even if I don't want to, I can't stop myself from crying.
Lili, I'm not crying because you left without any words, I'm crying because I was so worried about you.
"Jen!" I looked at the girl who sat on the chair in front of me.
I was at the cafeteria right now, thinking about.... Lili.
"You came out of nowhere again." I said a bit surprised.
"Sorry if I surprised you." she said while smiling.
"Anyway, do you want to come with me?" she added.
"Where?" I asked.
"In a welcome party." she answered.
"Do I have too? I'm a bit shy." I said.
"Yes, you and my grandma became close and plus, my Mom was already here. I want you to meet her." Jisoo said.
I think I need to tell Jisoo the truth. She can't like me because I was already inlove with Lili. She's a good friend of mine, I don't want to hurt her in the end.
But how should I start?
"Don't worry, I already invited Nayeon, Irene and Bam in the party." she said while smiling at me.
"Okay." I said then forced a smile.
-
I don't want to go, but I thought that if I'll go, I will have the chance to talk to grandma Isabelle. I'll ask her about Lili, who knows that she knows where Lili was.
We were currently at Irene's house. The three of us decided to prepare here and Jisoo with Bam will pick us up here.
I was wearing a red heart shaped tube long fitted gown with a slit on my right leg and let my hair fall on the back.
After an hour, we heard a car stopped and beeped in front of the house.
The first one that I noticed was Jisoo. She was wearing a black lady tuxedo. Okay, she really look hot tonight. She really look different right now.
"Woah, hi gorgeous ladies." Bam said.
"Stop smiling on us pervert!" Nayeon said with annoyance and sat at the backseat of Bam's car.
"Don't mind her. She's on her red days." Irene said while chuckling and clung onto Bam's arm.
They both entered in Bam's car and Irene sat on the passenger seat.
"We'll get going now Jisoo!" Bam said then started the car.
"Let's go?" Jisoo said with a smile when she looked at me. I clung to her arm and we walked to her car.
"Anyway, who will you guys welcome?" I asked. I remember that she didn't mention anyone when she invited me.
"Ah, for my my long lost cousin." she said then drove to their mansion.
"Really?" I asked.
"Yeah. Anyway, wear this mask." she said then handed me a mask.
"Red huh? This explains why you asked me what color will I wear." I said.
"Jen?" she said.
"Yes?"
"You look so beautiful tonight." she said while smiling and I gave her the same smile.
*Manoban's Mansion*
I felt nervous when we arrived at their mansion. I was just clinging onto Jisoo's arm like a kuala while she kept on greeting the guests.
This was an elite party.
I feel like I don't belong here. I'm glad that we're wearing a mask.
"Hey beautiful, just smile." Jisoo said then gave me a warm smile. I smiled.
"Where's Bam and the others?" I asked.
"Don't worry, we'll definitely see them anytime." she answered still smiling.
"Jisoo-yah!" me and Jisoo turned to look at the woman who called her.
I got shocked when she suddenly kissed Jisoo on the cheek.
"I missed you baby." she said then cupped Jisoo's cheeks.
"Nah! I'm not a baby anymore." Jisoo said while removing the woman's hand that were cupping her cheeks.
"Why are you always lile that to me?" the woman said while pouting and she suddenly looked at me.
Jisoo looked at me too then pulled me closer to her.
"Who is she?" the woman asked. I suddenly felt nervous.
"Mom, this is Jen. And please stop scaring her." Jisoo said.
Wait, Mom? What?
I was surprised when Jisoo's Mom suddenly laughed.
"I was just kidding Sooya. Hi Jennie, I'm Tanya, Jisoo's Mom. You can call me aunt. I heard a lot of things about you." she said then smiled at me.
"Really?" I asked confusedly.
"Yes. Jisoo always talk about you when we were talking. And I'm happy that I finally met the girl that my daughter likes." she answered.
"Mom!" Jisoo said.
"Why Sooya? Don't be shy." Jisoo's Mom said while laughing.
"Sorry." Jisoo whispered in my ear. I just smiled at her.
"Oh guys, I have to go. I have a lot of things to do right now." she said. She hugged me and kissed Jisoo's cheek before she left.
"I didn't know that she was your Mom. I thought she was your sister." I whispered to Jisoo.
"Haha Yeah. People always tell me that. Even my Dad looks like my brother." she said.
"Sooya! I like her!" we heard Jisoo's Mom yelled to us.
"Aish!" Jisoo said while scratching her nape. I chuckled.
After a few minutes, we already saw Bam and the others. I sat on the table where Irene, Nayeon and Bam was sitting, and Jisoo pulled her cousin with her.
"Hey sorry. They were really stubborn." Jisoo said then sat next to me.
"It's okay, don't worry." I said then smiled at her.
"Uhm, where's grandma Isabelle? I just wanted go greet them." I said.
This was the right time. I was thinking about Lili since at Irene's house to this party.
"They were at---" Jisoo was cutted when the emcee started to talk.
"Let me get your attention everyone!" We all stood up and went on the center of the mansion. I looked at the emcee and realized that it was Jisoo's Mom.
"I would like to thank you all for coming. Tonight was so special to our family because we already found our long lost family member. Ladies and Gentlemen, the last Manoban, my niece. Lalisa Kim-Manoban!" Jisoo's Mom said.
I heard the crowd clapped their hands. I looked at the stage and saw a girl wearing a black lady tuxedo and a black mask. She was walking down the stairs.
It seemed like everything became slow. I suddenly became deaf and she was the only person I can see. I felt the tears forming on the side of my eyes.
My heart kept on increasing its speed.
I just followed her using my eyes and watching ever step she take until she stopped on aunt Tanya's side. Even if she's wearing a mask, I know who's the girl behind it.
I finally found her!
I finally saw you Lili!
I tried to stop my tears from falling. I can't cry right now. I was just beside Jisoo and they will be confused.
She get the mic from Jisoo's Mom.
"Goodevening everyone. Thank you for coming and thank you to my family for making this party for me."
I missed her voice.
She removed her mask after she said those words. I wanted to cry in happiness. I miss her so much.
I miss you so much Lili!
"Jen, take off your mask." I heard Jisoo said and I took it off. I didn't notice that they already took their mask off.
When I turned to Lili again, I saw her looking at me with shock. She didn't expect me to be here.
We stared at each other like we were the only people in this place. A tear escaped from my eye, I quickly wiped it and looked at her again.
I saw her with Jisoo's Mom walking to our direction.
My heart was beating so fast, all I wanted to do right now was to hug her. I didn't saw her for these past few weeks but it felt like years.
A smile was slowly forming into my lips when suddenly...
She just walked passed me like she doesn't know me at all.
I even felt our shoulder touched but she didn't looked at me. I can't do anything but to look at her.
I followed her using my eyes, they kept on walking and greeting every guests.
How can I describe the pain that I was feeling right now?
It was so painful. Very painful that I couldn't speak, move nor cry. I felt empty and dead inside.
"Jen, you okay?" Jisoo asked worriedly.
I looked at Jisoo and gave her a smile. I looked at Lili again. Is that it Lili?
I smiled wider. Fvck! I'm even being fake with myself. I'm really happy. Yes it was painful but I was happy, because she was alive, because she's fine, because she finally found her family, because she already know who she really was.
I told you Lili! I'll be okay when I saw you, but why was it hurt so much?!
Half hour already passed and all I did in that time was to stare at her. It just hurt so much, within that time, she never looked at me.
I want to pull her from the people she's talking to. I want to pull the hair of the girls who were smiling at her seductively. But who am I to do it? Am I still her girlfriend? It seemed like she doesn't know me anymore.
"Sooya!" I heard Jisoo's Mom causing me to look up.
My heart started to beat fast when I saw them heading in our direction.
"Jisoo, this is your cousin Lisa. Lisa, this Jisoo my daughter and Jen." Aunt Tanya said then Lili and Jisoo shook hands.
I was just looking at Lili. After a few seconds, I go surprise when Jisoo rest her arm on my nape. I looked at Jisoo and she was smiling at me. I looked at Lili and I can't read any emotion in her eyes.
Jisoo left for a while, her relatives called her. She asked me if I wanted to go with her but I declined because I was shy. I was walking alone in this party now. I was walking with my head hanging low and all I can feel was the pain in my chest.
I'm really amazed with myself. I'm not even crying right now.
I looked up and jumped lightly in surprise when I saw her. She was standing far and looking at me. She was the only one I can see even tho there's a lot of people here. She suddenly walked away, but there's something in her eyes that was telling me to follow her.
So I did.
Until we reached the fountain in their large garden. Her back was facing me and she has her hands inside her pocket. I slowly walked to her.
She slowly looked at me. I can't help but to smile and my tears fell at the same time.
What I did first was to hug her tight.
This is real! I already found her!
I pulled out the hug and looked directly at her eyes. I wiped my tears even tho It didn't do anything because my tears can't stop from falling.
"I missed you." the first words that came out from my mouth.
"Nini." she said that made me smile and cried harder at the same time.
"You and Jisoo look so perfect together. I saw in her eyes that she really loves you." she said with a smile, but that made my smile fade.
"I'm letting you go." she added that hurt me more.
"Why Lili?" that's the only thing that came out of my mouth.
"I can't hold you anymore." she said but she wasn't looking directly in my eyes. Then she looked at my eyes.
"I'm not the girl who deserve your love." she said and her tears fell from her eyes.
"How can you that? Why? Tell me why?!" I said while crying hard.
"How and Why, Nini? Because I was only traveling here. I lost my memory but they were all back now. I wasn't supposed to be here. I was supposed to be dead by now. I need to go back and I'm not sure if I can come back that's why I'm letting you go." she said.
"Do you really have to do that? If yes, then okay. You said that you're not sure right? So there was still a chance for you to come back here. I'll wait for you, I don't care how long." I said while sobbing.
"But that's not right. What if I wasn't able to come back here? I don't want you to wait for nothing."
"What can I do? I love you even if I told myself not to. Even if you'll leave me here, I still love you! Even if you will not come back, I still love you Lili!" I yelled in her face while my tears kept on streaming down my cheeks.
"I don't want to say that I love you too, but that was the truth. You're making it harder for me to leave Nini,because I know that I'm already hurting you." her tears were also cascading down her cheeks.
"I'll agree Lili. Yes, I don't want you to go, but it was the right thing to do, then go. I'll understand you, I'll wait for you until everything was okay, I promise."
"You're my greatest downfall. You're the person that I love in a wrong time. You are the perfect one for me that I found in a damn imperfect place. You're everything that couldn't be fvcking mine!" she yelled while her tears were still flowing down her cheeks.
"You're the first person that made my heart beats insanely fast. So even if you'll leave and never ever come back, It will still beat for you. You will still have me even if you don't want to. You owned my heart since the day I saw you. My heart was owned since the day I met Lisa." I cried harder.
I felt her pulled me close to her. She smashed her lips on mine while hugging me tight.
I can hear her crying.
I can hear her pulse.
I can hear her every breath.
I can hear heart beating so fast.
We went in the mansion respectively. I'm better now, I can do this.
"Jen? Where did you go? I've been looking for you." Jisoo asked when she saw me.
"Ah, I just went outside to have some fresh air." I answered.
"Is that so? Let's go then." she said. She put my hand on her arms telling me to clung into it, so I did.
When we went inside, there was a lot of people dancing, the song was sweet. I saw Irene dancing with Bam and Nayeon was dancing with someone I don't know.
"Jen, may I have this dance?" Jisoo asked. I looked at her and gave her my hand.
While me and Jisoo was dancing, she suddenly spoke.
"I get to know Lisa more, and I think we'll get along so well." she said.
"She'll be staying in our house. That's good though, I've been wanting to have a sister." Jisoo said while smiling and I was just looking at her.
If you only knew Jisoo.
I looked at the two person dancing behind Jisoo. It was Lili and Aunt Tanya.
"Ow, let's exchange partner. I want to dance with my daughter." Aunt Tanya said with a smile.
Jisoo gave my hand to Lili. Jisoo and her Mom danced while me and Lili was just standing while holding hands.
She slowly placed my hand on her shoulder as she rest her hand on my waist and our other hands were holding each other. She slowly moved and I followed her steps until we were both dancing.
You're in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
It talks about the two of us who love each other so much.
So close together
And when I'm with you
So close to feeling alive
We're so close on have everything that we wanted together, but we're so far of having each other.
A life goes by
Romantic dreams must die
So I bid my goodbye
And never knew
Well, I guess this was just like a forbidden love.
These song centers around these quite moments that we have next to each other.
So close.
So close, was waiting
Waiting here with you
And now, forever, I know
All that I wanted
To hold you so close
Our moment will soon come to an end and will face the reality again. Bid each other goodbye and accept the fact that we'll never be together.
So close to reaching
That famous happy end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
And now you're beside me
And look how far we've come
So far we are, so close
Oh how could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now
When I decided to give up on finding a true love and an happy ending, she came into my life. She made me feel that we're so close on achieving that romantic dream.
But why was she leaving now that I believe in fairytale?
We're so close to reaching
That famous happy end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
We're so close on reaching it all.
I'm so close on reaching her but yet so far.
Let's go on dreaming
For we know we are
So close, so close
And still so far
When the song came in to its end, I can't stop my tears from falling. I used my hand which was resting on Lili's shoulder to wiped my tears. I looked away when I saw her staring at me with worried eyes.
"Jen." I turned and saw Jisoo. She was smiling when she held my right hand.
"Let's go, Bam and the others were looking for us." she said then pulled me.
I let Jisoo pulled me but stopped when I felt Lili's grip tightened on my left hand. I turned and looked at her. Her eyes was telling me something but I don't know what was it.
Does she don't want me to go?
She doesn't want me to go with Jisoo?
"Let's go?" Jisoo asked but I did looked at her because I was just staring at Lili.
Tell me Lili. I said to myself.
After a few seconds, I felt her loosen her grip on my hand until she let it go.