14. the drunk kiss
More Than A Band - Lemonade Mouth
"reach for my hand, cause it's held out for you, shoulders are stronger but you can cry on them too, everything changes.."
***
"hey," Spencer entered the choir room where Puck came out with a frown on his face, "yo," Spencer held his history textbook in his hand, "how's the song-writing going?"
"hey," Rachel smiled at the older Hudson, "it's going amazing," Rachel comes towards him, "I think i might have a really big hit here, which is why i wanted you to come by,"
Spencer smiled, "i want you to hear it," Spencer looked at Brad, "oh, yeah, cool," Spencer looked at Rachel, "come here,"
Spencer walked towards Rachel, when she wrapped her arms around his waist, "what was that for?" Rachel looked up at Spencer, "to break the tension,"
"yeah," Rachel looked at Spencer, "and i know that we have some unresolved feelings, but like my two new role models Carole King and Gerry Goffin,"
Spencer furrowed his eyebrows at the two names, "i think it's important that we just put them aside and stay focused on our mission which is just to write an amazing song to win regionals with,"
Spencer nods his head, "well, i have no actual idea who those people are, but i'm board," Spencer smiled down at Rachel, "let's hear it,"
"its just.." Spencer takes a seat on the spinning chair, "it's a little rough, but, uh.." Rachel goes towards her music sheet, "i think it's really special,"
Spencer smiled at Rachel when she started singing about a headband, "hold.." Spencer held out his finger, "hold on, uh... is this song about your headband?"
"yes, it's called my headband," Rachel smiled at him, "they say you should write about what you know,"
"well," Spencer looked around the choir room, "uh, it's really.... interesting, but it's not... emotional, or, like, good,"
"it's sucks," Spencer nods his head, "yeah, i'm sorry," Rachel looked st Spencer, "how am i supposed to write a song like Joni Mitchell or Carole King? they've lived,"
Spencer stood up from the chair, "well, maybe if you want to be a artist like them, you should do a little living," Rachel nods her head, "you're so right,"
"i mean, even now, it... it's alcohol awareness week," Spencer frowned, "and we're supposed to sing songs about the dangers of drinking, and i've never even had a drink,"
"wait, seriously?" Spencer furrowed his eyebrows, "that's why she is always so uptight, wait," Rachel looked at Spencer, "where are you going?"
Rachel bit her lip, "to find Puckerman," Rachel looked at Spencer, "you know, my journey from little princess to natural woman begins his Saturday night at my house,"
"wait," Rachel looked at Spencer, "maybe i could help you with the song writing, i'm actually pretty good at it," Rachel smiled at Spencer, "okay,"
***
"did your hear?" Artie looked at Mercedes and Spencer, "yes, Spencer just told me and Mercedes," Spencer looked at Mercedes, "whoa he on the phone too?"
"Brittany and Santana," Spencer looked at Artie with Mercedes, "tell them we'll go if they go," Artie shook his head, "tell them yourselves, i ain't no pony express,"
Spencer went into his pocket, and grabbed his phone calling Santana, "you're going, right?" Santana looked at Brittany, "only if you're going,"
Spencer's cheeks go red, "and if there's liquor, because a Rachel berry party is not something we can do sober," Brittany looked at Santana, "but it's alcohol awareness week,"
"that is true," Santana smirked at Samaria and Brittany, "precisely, and i am aware of how much fun alcohol is,"
"let's ask Puckerman," Samaria calls Puck, "go for Puck," Samaria smirked into her phone, "Noah, it's Samtittany and Spartcedes,"
Samaria smirks, "can your friend score us some wine coolers?" Puck looked down, "no, but his i.d can,"
the seven of them met up in the hallway, "well, if we're all in, then it's settled," Santana smiled when she looked st Spencer, "the Rachel Berry House Party Train Wreck Extravaganza is officially a go,"
the five of them walked off when Brittany and Artie both smiled when it left Santana and Spencer alone, "so, what are you doing on Saturday?"
Spencer rolled his blue eyes, "going to Rachel's party, you know," Santana nods her head, "maybe we can go together," Spencer shrugged his shoulders, "sure, Santana,"
Santana turns to Spencer, "you know that this doesn't mean we're back together, right?" Santana nods her head, "yeah, i know, but at Rachel's party can you at least give me one kiss?"
Spencer shrugged his shoulders with a smirk playing on his plumped lips, "maybe," and with that Spencer walked away from Santana as she just stared at her ex-boyfriend who fist bumped and bro hugged some of the football players, "god, he's so hot,"
***
"welcome," Spencer kissed Rachel's forehead as Santana held his hand, as the two of them were in his car, kissing.
"yeah," Santana walked past them when she pulls onto Spencer's hand, when he half smiled at Rachel, "i'll talk to you later,"
she nods her head when Spencer goes towards the piano as Santana sits onto his lap she Brittany and Artie come towards them.
"hey," Spencer and Artie bro hugged when Brittany and Santana both smiled at each other when Brittany's eyes goes towards Samaria and Sam who were kissing each other on Rachel's sofa.
"they're gross," Santana rolled her eyes at her best friend, "okay, Britt," Spencer wrapped his arms tighter around Santana's waist when Quinn looks over towards them with a frown on her face.
Spencer kissed Santana's shoulder as she wore a jacket over her tank top with a skirt on, "hmm," Spencer chuckled into Santana's neck, as she leaned her head back onto Spencer's shoulder.
Spencer stood up, when he grabbed a wine cooler as he saw Kurt, Blaine and Finn come down the stairs, "i thought you weren't coming?"
Finn looked at his twin brother, "Kurt's been blackmailing me ever since he saw my browser history," Spencer rolled his eyes, "he kind of insisted that i come,"
Spencer pats Finn's arm, "next time, delete your browser history that's what i do when Kurt wants to go on my laptop," Finn nods his head, "thanks,"
"oh and," Spencer looked at Finn, "just because i'm talking to you doesn't mean we're okay, Finn, you did something i'd never do to you," and with that Spencer bro hugged Blaine when he hugs Kurt, "it's good to see you guys here,"
"yeah," Sam and Samaria were kissing when Spencer goes onto the couch with them, "oh, hey guys," Mercedes, Sean, Puck, Micaela, Mason, Tina, Brooke and Mike chuckle at Spencer, "how's it going?"
"good," Samaria then connects her lips back onto Sam's when she sees Brittany looking at her, "uh, okay.."
Spencer stood up from the couch with his wine cooler in his hand when Puck just pats his back, as he sat on a table with Mike, Brooke, Sean, Micaela, Mason and Tina.
"hey, girlfriend," Rachel looked at Quinn, "having fun?" Quinn looked at Rachel, when her eyes goes onto Santana who was gripping Spencer's shirt down to connect their lips, "yeah... awesome party,"
"uh, okay," Rachel furrowed her eyebrows, "let's... let's go over the rules," Rachel gets a coupon, "everybody gets two drink tickets to keep things from getting out of hand,"
Rachel hands Blaine and Kurt the tickets when Micaela, Sean, Mike and Brooke rolled their eyes, "we're serving wine coolers, that is our specialty drink,"
"Brittany!" Spencer pulled away from Santana, as Brittany was sat on top of the piano with Mason and Maisy beside her, "remember the rules, no sitting on anything,"
Brittany jumps down from the piano with a frown on her face when Artie pulls her into his lap, "okay, okay, everybody,"
"cheers!" Artie looked at Spencer, Brittany, Santana, Brooke, Mike, Sean and Micaela who stood behind him, "great party, Rachel,"
"but-" Spencer looked at Rachel, "we got to run," Brooke nods her head, "yeah, we have dinner reservations," Brittany looked at Spencer then towards Rachel, "and then we're going bowling,"
"but... but-" Rachel looked at the eight of them, "we haven't even played celebrity yet, i..." Mike walked off with Sean and Micaela behind him and Brooke.
Rachel looked at Spencer who held a wine cooler in his hand, "why is everybody leaving?" Puck and Finn both looked at Rachel, "because this party blows,"
Rachel frowns, "i haven't even had my first sip yet, how am i supposed to write both sides now if i can't even throw a party?" Puck looked at Spencer then towards Rachel, "look, if you want everyone to stay, you have to let us break into your dad's liquor cabinet,"
Finn looked at the wine coolers, "no one is going to get buzzed off two wine coolers," Spencer looked at Rachel, "we'll replace them before your dad's get home,"
Finn nods his head when Spencer goes towards Rachel holding her hands, "i promise," Rachel looked at Puck, "let's party!"
"poppin' bottles in the ice," Spencer danced alongside Mike and Brittany, red cups in their hands, "like a blizzard,"
"now i'm feeling so fly," Spencer smirks when Samaria comes towards them with Sam beside her, "like a G6,"
"like a G6," Mike grabs onto Spencer's arm, taking him where Mercedes, Brooke, Tina and Quinn drank, "let's go!"
Spencer downed his shot, the burning sensation going down his throat, "like a G6... like a G6,"
Spencer looked at Brittany as she was laid out on a table with her stomach showing when Santana puts salt onto Brittany's stomach and some on her neck, with a lime in her mouth, "you ready?"
Samaria balances the shot glass on the zipper of Brittany's shorts, "don't move," Spencer smiled down at Brittany, when he leans downwards going towards her neck, when he sucks the salt off of Brittany's neck.
when he moved his head towards Brittany's stomach, as he licked the salt off of her stomach when he takes the lime out of her mouth, before tipping his head back to the down the shot, "now i'm feeling so fly, like a G6..."
"Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!"
Rachel downs her drink, "it tastes like pink, it tastes like pink!" Brooke frowned before she started talking to Rachel.
"they be acting like they drunk..." Quinn falls into Spencer's embrace, her arms around his shoulders when Spencer looked at Quinn, "you okay?" Quinn pulls her arms away from Spencer's shoulders when she nods her head, "y-yeah.."
Spencer stood on a table with Sean, when Micaela and Brittany come towards them, hugging their waists as Spencer and Sean both hold pillows in their arms.
Spencer furrowed his eyebrows when Santana looked at him, "you like her more than me," some tears came down Santana's face, "she's blonde and awesome and so smart,"
"admit it, just admit it!" Spencer furrowed his eyebrows at Santana, when he puts his hand onto her waist, "no, kiss me," she grabs his face in her hands when she connects their lips together.
"let's play spin the bottle!" the new directions cheer staring at Rachel, "who wants to play spin the bottle?"
Spencer furrowed his eyebrows at Finn, when Rachel leans down and screams, "spin the bottle!"
***
"spin the bottle, spin the bottle..." Brittany spins the bottle, when the bottle lands on Spencer, when his blue eyes widened as he looked at Brittany, "uh.."
Brittany smirks, when she puts her hand onto his tanned cheek, as Spencer looks behind Brittany towards Artie who nods his head, "you know what?" everyone turns to Santana, "a reminder... i owns them plumped lips,"
Spencer looked at Santana when she went back to sipping her drink, when Spencer put his hand onto Brittany's hair, when they both push their lips together, "hmm," Spencer then moved his hands onto Brittany's waist, pulling her closer towards him making Samaria frown.
"oh, whoo!" Spencer smiled into the kiss with Brittany, as his lips never left hers until Santana pulled him back, "hey, honeys," Santana looked down at Spencer, "it's not a big red commercial, no me gusta,"
Spencer pulls down Santana down onto his lap, when he moves up when he puts her beside him, as he kissed her cheek.
"party!" Spencer looked at Rachel, "it's my turn! my turn!" Spencer furrowed his eyebrows, she spins the bottles when Spencer was looking down at the bottle, when it stops onto Spencer again, "oh!"
Sean and Puck look at Spencer, "it looks like Spencer is getting all the action," Spencer shrugged his shoulders, scratching the back of his neck, "this is outstanding!"
Rachel points at Spencer, "Spencer Hudson, i'm gonna rock your world," Rachel comes towards Spencer, when Spencer pulled his lips onto Rachel's as she grabbed onto his collar of his shirt.
"yeah! oh!" the new directions cheer, "deep! deep!" Brittany looked at Samaria over Rachel, "more! more! more! more! more!"
Spencer put his hand onto Rachel's cheek, "okay, i think we've had enough of that," Kurt got uncomfortable with Rachel kissing his stepbrother, "ha! ha!"
Rachel pulls away from Spencer opening her brown eyes, "you face.... tastes awesome," Santana pulls Spencer back into her embrace, "i think i just found a new duet partner!"
"you were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar," Spencer looked at Rachel, "when i met you,"
"you.." the new directions smirk, "i picked you out," Spencer shakes his hand, "i shook you up and turned you around," Mike, Brooke, Sean and Micaela danced behind the new directions, "turned you into someone new,"
"new.." Spencer took the microphone off of the stand, "don't... don't.. don't you want me?" he looked at Rachel, "you know i can't believe it when i hear that you won't see me,"
"don't... don't.... don't... don't you want me?" he smirks at Rachel, "you know i don't believe it when you say that you don't need me,"
Rachel puts her hand onto her microphone, "it's much to late to find, you think you've changed your mind," Rachel runs his fingers through her hair, "you better change it back, or we will both be sorry,"
"don't you want me, baby? don't you want me? oh-oh-oh-oh.." Spencer jumped up and down with Rachel, "don't you want me, baby? don't you want me? oh-oh-oh-oh.."
"i was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar," Rachel smiled, "that much is true," Spencer comes towards Rachel, "true... but even then i knew i'd find a much better place,"
Spencer and Rachel both body roll, "either with or without you," Spencer looked at Rachel, "don't.."
"don't.."
"don't you want me?" Rachel looked at the new directions, "don't you want me?" Spencer smirks, "you know i can't believe it when i hear that you won't see me,"
"it's much too late to find," Mike held onto Brooke's waist as they kissed, "you think you've changed your mind, you better change it back or we will both be sorry,"
"don't you want me, baby?" Santana looked at Spencer beside Quinn, "i want you, i do," Santana sipped onto her drink, "don't you want me? oh-oh-oh-oh.."
"don't you want me, baby?" Spencer smirks, "oh, oh.." Spencer looked at Rachel, "don't you want me? oh-oh-oh-oh..."
"don't you want me, baby?" the new directions clapped their hands, when Spencer chuckled bringing Rachel into his chest, hugging her.
***
"i need to close my locker," Mercedes and Spencer made their way towards Tina, "and it's going to sound like a gunshot," Spencer wore his black sunglasses alongside the rest of the new directions, "i have had the worst hangover since Saturday and it's Monday,"
"i've been dry-heaving all weekend," Santana looked at them, "and when my mother asked what the sound was, i said i was practicing bird calls,"
Mason looked at the three girls beside Spencer, "you guys, i can't stop barfing," Spencer winced, "please don't say barf,"
"i caught a whiff of hairspray and went full Linda Blair in the girl's bathroom," Spencer looked at them, "i told my mom i had the flu, and she made me chicken noodle soup,"
"my mom made me and Mike a traditional year made out of Panda hair," Spencer frowns, "can we talk about anything else?"
the five of them turn a corner when they see the new directions standing there with Artie, "how about some bloody Mary's, y'all?"
Micaela looked at Artie beside Sean who was leaning against the wall, "are you actually kidding me?" Maisy looked at Artie, "the last thing we want to do is drink more,"
Artie looked at Maisy and Micaela, "it'll help your hangover," Artie hands Brittany the cups as she hands them out, "that's what bloody Mary's are for,"
Mason looked at them, "hair of the dog that some bit your ass," Brittany hands Spencer a cup with a small smile on her face, "blame it on the goose, got you feeling loose,"
"blame it on the 'tron, got you in the zone," Spencer furrowed his eyebrows at Artie, "blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol, blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol,"
Artie smirks, "ay, she says she usually don't," Spencer smirks back at Artie, "she usually don't.." Artie nods his head, "but i know that she front,"
"cause shorty know what she want," Spencer nods his head, as the both of them go towards a girl who was at her locker, "but she don't wanna seem like she's easy,"
Spencer looked at Artie, "i ain't saying what you won't do, but you know we probably gonna do," Artie fist bumps him, "what you've been feelin' deep inside, don't lie now,"
Spencer wore a black short sleeve button up shirt with his black sunglasses on his face, "boy, what you drinking?" Maisy looked at Spencer, "gonna let it sink in,"
Spencer danced with Brittany, as Mike danced danced with Santana and Puck with Micaela, "here for the weekend thinking we can see.."
Spencer danced with Brittany with a smirk on his face, "..what we can be if we press fast forward," Spencer held onto Brittany's arms, before letting go, "just one more round and you're down, i know it,"
"fill another cup up," Spencer nods his head at Puck, "feeling on yo butt, what?" Spencer comes towards Mercedes with Artie, "you don't even care now, i was unaware how fine you was before my buzz set in,"
"my buzz set in.." the new directions rushed towards the edge of the stage, "blame it on the goose," Mercedes smirks, "blame it on the goose,"
Spencer danced with the new directions, "got you feeling loose.. blame it on 'tron, got you in the zone," Mercedes smirks with Brooke, "alcohol.."
"blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol," Brittany danced with Spencer, "blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol,"
the new directions go behind Mercedes, Spencer and Artie, "blame it on the vodka, blame it on the henny," the new directions smirk, "hey.."
"blame it on the blue top, got you feelin' dizzy," Spencer does a dizzy motion, "blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol,"
"blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol," Spencer and Artie both do the dodgie dance move, "now to the ballad poopin' bottles with their henny,"
Spencer smiled at Mercedes, "in their cups, screaming money ain't a thing if you ain't throw it up in the sky," the new directions throw their hands up, "in the sky.."
"and hold your drinks up high," Spencer held his hand up, "up high.." Spencer rushed towards the new directions girls chair, "and to my independent mamas who can buy their own bottles,"
Spencer smiled at Santana, "if you're looking like a model when them broke fellas holla," Artie smiled, "tell them bye,"
"bye.." the new directions rush back to Artie and Mercedes with Spencer in front with them, "and hold your drinks up high,"
"up high.."
the new directions sing, "blame it on for goose, got you feeling loose," Mr Schuester taps his hand against his chair, "blame it on the 'tron, got you in the zone, blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol,"
"alcohol.." Mercedes smiled, "blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol," they go into their positions, with Mercedes in the middle of Spencer and Artie, "blame it on vodka,"
"hey.."
"blame it on the henny," the new directions smirk, "hey.." Mr Schuester smiled, "blame it on the blue top, got you feeling dizzy,"
"hey.."
Artie smirked, "blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol," Spencer smiled at Mr Schuester along with Mercedes and Artie, as the new directions go the chairs, "blame it on the a-a-a-a-a alcohol,"
"whoo!" Brittany falls onto the comfortable red chair, "well down, you guys," Mr Schuester clapped his hands, "i mean, you always bring it with the singing and the dancing, but what i was really impressed with today was your acting,"
Spencer looked at Mr Schuester, "i truly thought that some of you guys were drunk," Artie looked at Mr Schuester, "we take our craft very serious,"
"problem is," Mr Schuester comes towards them, "that song is great, but it... it kind of glorifies drinking, don't you think?"
Spencer shrugged his shoulders, "i mean, we're supposed to sing about the dangers of alcohol for this assembly," Maisy looks at Mr Schuester, "well, good luck finding a song that does that,"
"Mr Schue?" Rachel looked at Mr Schuester, "first of all, that best is very cute," Spencer furrowed his eyebrows, "you are all kinds of awesome, but second, maybe there really no songs about the dangers of drinking because there's really none as long as you have a proper designated driver,"
Spencer had his hand in his pocket, "have i ever told you how hot you are?" Santana pulls Spencer away from Rachel, "well, Rachel, yeah, driving drunk is dangerous,"
Spencer wrapped his arm around Santana, "and have you guys ever heard of alcohol poisoning? yeah, it kills about 400 people every year," tears started coming down Santana's face, "uh,"
Mr Schuester looked at Santana, "Santana, are you crying?" Santana shook her head, "i'm okay, i'm okay," Spencer pulls Santana into his chest, "you're such a hypocrite,"
Quinn looked at Mr Schuester, "you drink, most adults do," Mr Schuester looked at Quinn, "well, i may have a beer every now and then, but i don't... i don't get drunk,"
Puck looked at Mr Schuester, "we're just saying that this is a waste of time, i mean, we're totally aware of alcohol," Spencer rubs Santana's back, "we see adults drinking it and having fun,"
"every commercial brewk drinking NASCAR is for beer," Spencer nods his head, "okay, enough, guys," Mr Schuester let out a breath, "look, tomorrow come with your thinking caps on because we're going to spend the entire day brainstorming ideas for songs to sing at this assembly,"
Santana cries more into Spencer's black shirt, when he kissed her forehead, "are you okay?" Spencer wipes away Santana's tears from her face, "i'm okay,"
***
"i wasn't that drunk, was i?" Santana and Kurt both looked at Spencer who stood alongside Blaine, "you spent the entire night with Rachel Berry,"
Spencer frowned, when he looked at Santana, "wasn't i with you?" Santana looked at her ex boyfriend, "you were until you kissed her and then you were all over her,"
Spencer scratched the back of his neck, "i'm sorry, San," Santana shook her head, "it's okay, we're not together, all we do is kiss,"
Kurt looked at Spencer, "and that is what we call rock bottom, Spence," Spencer just chuckled at his stepbrother when he wrapped his arm around Kurt's shoulder, "but you guys love me,"
"you know, we do.." Spencer's phone started ringing when he furrowed his eyebrows, when he pulled his phone out of his letterman jacket, "speaking of the devil,"
"hi, Rach.." Spencer had his phone pressed against his ear, "two medium drops, one mocha and one hot chocolate," Spencer smiled at the barista, "Kurt, Santana, Blaine and i were just talking about you,"
"you were?" Rachel smiled through her phone, "you're such a cutie with you're letterman jacket and jeans," Spencer furrowed his eyebrows, "uh.."
Rachel goes towards her bed when she leans backwards, "so... i have a question for you," Spencer looked at Santana, "i wanted to know..."
Kurt looked at Spencer, "is she drunk?" Santana rolled her brown eyes, "if you'd go on a date with me," Spencer bit his lip, "uh, sure, i'll see you then,"
Spencer looked at the three of them, "Rachel just asked me out," Kurt and Blaine chuckled, "oh, that's amazing, she's got a girl crush on you, Spence,"
"wait a second," Kurt looked at Spencer, "why'd you say yes?" Kurt put his coffee down, looking at his stepbrother, "you can't lead her on,"
"who says i'm leading her on?" Santana frowned, "you can't actually be serious," Spencer shrugged his shoulders, "when we kissed, it... it felt good,"
Santana looked at Spencer, "it felt good because you were drunk," Spencer looked at Santana, "why do you even care? it's not like we're dating anyway,"
Santana scoffed, when she stood up, "just because we broke up doesn't mean i don't still love you, because.." tears came to Santana's eyes, "i do still love you and i can't stop loving you,"
"Santana..." Spencer frowned when Santana shook her head, "come on.." Santana looked at Spencer, "why don't you just go out with Rachel and forget about me, okay?"
and with that Santana walked out of the Lima bean when Spencer put his head to the wooden table, "what was that?"
Spencer looked up at Kurt, "i... i don't know," Kurt sighed, "Spencer, you know Rachel isn't the right girl for you, you still love Santana and she still loves you but now, you broke her heart,"
Spencer stood up, "i need to go,"
***
"Santana..." Spencer tried to grab onto Santana's arm, "come on, we need to talk about this,"
Santana turned to Spencer with her arms crossed over her chest, "talk about what? how you broke my heart or that you're taking Rachel out on a date?"
Spencer scratched his neck, "i know i broke your heart but you broke mine first," Santana looked at Spencer, "everyone thinks i'm the heartbreaker but actually you broke mine first," Santana pokes Spencer's chest, "in sophomore year when you were too busy to make time for me as you were hanging out with Rachel."
Spencer tried to hug Santana, "please," Santana shook her head, "why don't you ask Rachel to give you a hug?" Spencer sighed, "i don't want to, i want you to give me a hug because-"
"-i love your hugs," Santana was about to give in when she sees Samaria standing there with her arms crossed over her chest shaking her head, "i'm sorry, i- i have to go,"
"you guys, i'm really nervous," Brittany looked at the new directions, "Ke$ha's been a cultural icon for weeks, and i really want to do her music justice,"
"and we haven't had enough rehearsal," Spencer frowned, "or any at all," Brooke nods her head with Samaria's statement, "and most of our assembly performances usually end in some kind of riot,"
Rachel looked at her teammates, "never fear, teammates," Rachel hands out red cups, "now, it's a broadway tradition for nervous performers to take a shot of whiskey before going on to calm their nerves,"
Santana furrowed her eyebrows, "and to mask the stench of bad dental hygiene," Rachel pour some drink into her cup, "and in that tradition, i have mixed us a playful showbiz cocktail of what was left in my dad's liquor cabinet,"
Spencer frowned, "there's some brandy and vermouth and port wine and scotch in here, and also a little bit of kool-aid, and some crumbled up Oreos,"
"oh, my god," Spencer covered his mouth, "that looks disgusting," Santana drank some, "this tastes like cough syrup," Rachel nods her head, "there's also cough syrup,"
"cheers," Spencer held a half full cup of drunk, Spencer took a sip when he shook his head, "Ke$ha,"
"to Ke$ha!" Principal Figgins looked at the students in the bleachers, "and now, performing the hit single, tik and also tok, by rapper Key-dollar-sign-ha, the new directions,"
the lights go down, "wake up in the morning," Brittany pulls open the curtains, "feeling like P. Diddy,"
"hey, what up? Girl?" Artie and Spencer both smirk, "grab my glasses, i'm our the door, i'm gonna hit this city,"
"let's go.." the new directions boys faces the students and teachers of McKinley, "before i leave brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack,"
the new directions boys leaned forwards, "cause when i leave for the night, i ain't coming back," Spencer shook his head, "i'm talking pedicure on our toes, toes,"
the new directions move their hips, "trying on all our clothes, clothes," Brittany runs her fingers through her blonde hair, "boys blowing up our phones,"
the new directions do a phone sign with their fingers, "phones..." the new directions boys dance behind the girls, "drop-topping, playing our favourite cd's,"
"going up to the parties," the girls dance with Brittany, "trying to get a little bit tipsy," the new directions boys smirk, "don't stop, make it pop, dj blow my speakers up!"
Spencer smirks at Brittany, "tonight, i'mma fight til we see the sunlight," the new directions smiled, "tick tock on the clock, but the party don't stop, no,"
"oh, oh, oh, oh... oh...." the new directions dance behind Brittany, "don't stop, make it pop, Dj, blow my speakers up, tonight, i'mma fight til we see the sunlight,"
"tick tock on the clock, but the party don't stop, no," Brittany looks at Rachel, "i don't feel good," Rachel looked at Brittany, "power through it!"
"oh, oh, oh, oh..." the new directions dance, "you build me up," they point up, "you break me down," the new directions go onto the floor, "my heart, it pounds, yeah,"
Spencer smiled, "you got me with my hands up," the new directions sing with Brittany, "you've got me now, you've got that sound, yeah, you've got me,"
"oh..." Mercedes and Lauren stood on each side of Brittany, "you build me up, you break me down," they move away from Brittany, "my heart, it pounds."
"yeah, you've got me," they go back towards Brittany, "oh..." Spencer smiled at Maisy and Mercedes, "with my hands up,"
they throw their hands up, "put your hands up," they throw their hands up again, "put your hands up,"
Spencer and Sam punch the air, "now," Brittany does a splits, "the party don't start til i walk in," Brittany stands up, "don't stop, make it pop, Dj, blow my speakers up,"
"tonight, i'mma fight til we see the sunglight," Spencer smirked at the McKinley students and teachers, "tick tock on the clock, but the party don't stop, no,"
"oh, oh, oh, oh," Brittany holds her stomach when she throws up all over Rachel's face when Spencer looked away from them, "oh, my god,"
Rachel runs off the stage when Santana holds her stomach, when she throws up on the stage when Spencer held onto Santana, "come on, let's clean you up,"
Brittany looked out to the bleachers, "everybody, drink responsibly," Spencer picked up Santana when he makes his way towards the girls bathroom when he sits Santana down onto the chair.
"you don't have to do this," Spencer grabbed some tissue, wiping away the sick, "i want to," Santana shook her head, "Spence.."
Spencer put his finger to Santana's lips, "i know, you're still mad at me but let me help you," Santana sighed, "okay.."
"okay," Santana nods her head when Spencer looked at her, "do you have extra clothes in your locker?" Santana nods her head, "my combination is-"
Spencer stood Santana, "i know your locker combination, remember we were dating before," Santana sighed, "yeah," she refused to look up into Spencer's blue eyes, "i'll get your clothes and you can take a shower,"
Santana nods her head, "Spencer.." Spencer's hand was on the door handle, "yeah," he turned around facing Santana, "i still love you,"
Spencer scratched the back of his neck, "i still love you too, but we need to see other people," Santana sighs, "i know, i just wanted to say that, and that you will always be my first love,"
"same.. no one compares to you," Santana smiled when Spencer walked out of the girls bathroom, when Santana goes towards the showers.
***
"we all still quake in terror at what we witnessed yesterday at the assembly by a glee club," Spencer frowns from beside Maisy, "spiralling out of control,"
Mike turns to Spencer, who frowns at Mr Schuester, "my nose is still filled with the acrid stench of teen vomit, and there is, simply, but one person to blame,"
Spencer furrowed his eyebrows, "the alcoholic teen-vomit fetishist Will Schuester, the director of that club,"
Spencer looked at Mr Schuester, "two days ago, i received a drunk dial in the middle of February night from a horny," Spencer cringed at the word, "Will Schuester,"
Spencer's and Maisy's eyes widened, "open your ears, McKinley High," Mr Schuester shook his head, "oh, no.."
Coach Sylvester plays the drunk dial through the speakers, "and behold the awful price of alcoholism,"
Spencer looked at Finn and Santana, "hey there, sexy lady, there's something i really want to say to you," Maisy looked at Spencer with a frown, "i love how you eat your lunch with your little plastic gloves, and they crinkle and make the cutest sound i've ever heard in my life,"
"why don't you pick up some wine coolers," Finn furrowed his eyebrows, with a small smirk on his face, "and come over here? and it'll just one night is us just getting crazy, let's just get crazy!"
Spencer chuckled, "let's just get crazy and roll around in the hay, i was just in some hay earlier tonight," Mike smirked, "and i rode a bull and i was thinking of you,"
Spencer cringed along with the new directions in his class, "Will Schuester? you've just been publicly humiliated, and on that road to recovery, it's the very first step,"
***
Puck looked at them, "we're probably all going to get suspended," Mr Schuester looked at Puck, "i think you'll definitely get suspended, you'll probably all get suspended,"
"oh," Santana looked at Mr Schuester, "like you're the one to talk," Samaria smirks, "how about you crack a four loko, count boozy Von drunk-a-ton,"
Sam frowned down at his girlfriend, Principal Figgins made his way past Spencer and Puck, "William? Glee Club?"
the new directions looked at Principal Figgins,i have one word for you," Spencer closed his blue eyes, "congratulations,"
Spencer opened his eyes when he furrowed his eyebrows, "those special effects at the assembly really paid off!" the new directions furrowed their eyebrows at Figgins, "i have no idea what brilliant musical comedy performers you all have become,"
Mike, Brooke, Sean, Micaela, Sam, Samaria and Spencer furrowed their eyebrows, "the kids at this school, are scared straight,"
Mr Schuester licked his lips, "today is the first day in a month without a single act of public drunkenness at McKinley High!" he clappped his hands when the new directions then clapped their hands, "and as a thank you, here are coupons for half-off frozen yogurt,"
"yum," Mercedes looked at Spencer with a smile, Artie hands out the coupons to everyone, "William, i do think you need to see someone about your sex and love addiction,"
"i've talked to my pastor about you, and he's willing to meet you at your earliest convenience," Mr Schuester pats Figgins shoulder, "thank you,"
"okay," Figgins looked around the new directions, "achievement!" the new directions raised their hands, "yay,"
***
"i'm tron," Spencer sat beside Mercedes, "a part of me never wants to drink again because it made me so sick,"
Spencer pats Brittany's arm, Samaria just smirks at Brittany, "but if it weren't for drinking, the assembly would have been a disaster,"
Rachel closed her eyes, "i, for one, am never drinking again," Rachel looks at Brittany, "being thrown up on, twice," Samaria frowns when Rachel stare at her, "it just does something to a person,"
Mr Schuester comes in the choir room, "all right, guys," the new directions look at Mr Schuester, "while i'm happy things worked out with the assembly,"
he walks towards the middle of the room, "i never want to see you guys pull anything like that again," Spencer shook his head, "drinking while performing is unprofessional, drinking while at school is just stupid,"
the new directions look at Mr Schuester, "and, more importantly, any of you guys drinking at all is illegal,"
Quinn looked at Mr Schuester, "there's a fair amount of the pot calling the kettle black right now," Brittany turns to Spencer, "that is so racist,"
"i couldn't agree more," Mr Schuester looked at them, "which is why i'm going to stop drinking, not even a beer at the end of the night to take the edge off,"
Santana furrowed her eyebrows, "but if you don't drink, what will you have to live for?" Mr Schuester let out a smile, "i have plenty in my life without beer,"
"like what, exactly?" Mr Schuester looked at Mercedes, "that point is, i'm going to stop, and i hope you guys do, too,"
Tina looked at Mr Schuester, "isn't that kind of unrealistic?" Mr Schuester nods his head, "yeah, honestly, i think it is,"
"which is why i'm only going to ask you to do it until after Nationals," he grabs some papers, "consider yourselves like prize fighters getting ready for a big heavyweight bout, now,"
he opens his folder, "these are pledge forms, and i want you guys," Mr Schuester hands Spencer and Mercedes the blue paper, "to sign them,"
"and what if we fall of the wagon again?" Mr Schuester hands the paper out, "look in the top corner of your form, that's my cell phone number,"
"yes!" the new directions chuckle at Sam and Spencer, "i've always wanted Schuester's cell phone number," Spencer smirks, "part of your pledge is that if you do slip up, no matter where you are, or what time of the night it is,"
"i want you to call me to drive you home," Spencer smiled at his teacher, "we got lucky this time they the only consequences of your drinking was some ill-times vomiting,"
Mr Schuester looked at them, "none of us wants to see any of you guys get hurt," Santana smoked, "cool beans, Mr Schue, i'll sign this,"
"same.." Spencer took his pen from his bag signing the form, "i mean, alcohol has done nothing for my songwriting," Spencer looked at Mr Schuester, "what about after we in Nationals?"
Mr Schuester smiled when he turns to Spencer, who fist bumped his brother and his best friends, "i'm buying the sparkling cider,"
"yes!"
***
"there Spencer is," Kurt smiled at his stepbrother as he stood with Blaine in line, "uh," Spencer scratched his neck, "hey, Rachel, what's going on?"
"uh-" Rachel connects her lips with Spencer's, when Spencer closed his blue eyes as he wrapped his arms around Rachel's waist, "oh, wow,"
Spencer looked at Rachel, "what was that for?" Rachel shrugged her shoulders, "i don't know, but it felt right.." Spencer nods his head when he held Rachel's hand in his.
{Season 2, Episode 14: "Blame It On The Alcohol"}