I WAKE up to someone's arms draped tightly around my waist. The first thing on my mind was the terrible hungover feeling and the raw feeling in my stomach, I wasn't sure what happened last night but I was glad that I was safe and that's all that mattered. My philosophy is, if I was here right now, alive, that means I'm okay. The one thing I knew right now is that I was lying underneath Pep.
The last thing I remembered was snorting coke, seeing Pep as an angel, and then dozing off. Shit, coke really did a number on people, huh? We all knew Pep was the furthest thing from an angel. I stayed silent and unmoving for a while trying to remember what took place last night and how I ended up here. I stared at the unfamiliar ceiling. I guess this was Pep's personal bedroom. She had one at each location but I've never been in any, they were always locked.
I felt her grip loosen around me as she turned in her sleep. I took that as my opportunity to move. I was naked, which wasn't very surprising, I had a tendency of stripping when I got stupid wasted. What I wasn't sure about was if we had sex, if we did I would've loved to have been sober for our first time together. After all, it's all I can dream about. I silently searched for my clothes in the room and gave up after realizing how clean the place was. I pulled the silk red robe from the hook on the bathroom door after relieving myself and made my way out of the room to find a kitchen silently praying to not run into anyone from last night, especially seeing me tiptoeing out of Pep's private room.
At first glance, the walls were a different colour in both locations which I found strange. Instead of a dark colour, the walls were a deep rich mustard colour and instead of naked bodies, art pieces lined the wall. I took slow steps admiring each before I got to the landing and descended the wooden steps. The house was basic compared to the locations she had and it was much smaller. It felt more like an apartment and that's when the realization dawned on me that I was at Pep's house. The house everyone talked about - the property in the hills- and could only dream of entering but here I was, in her robe, walking through her house as if I owned the place. I contemplated if I should turn back and slip back into bed but my throat was dry and I desperately needed some water.
The living room had dark brown leather couches and a curved flat screen tv sitting on the wall above a faux fireplace. The wooden coffee table matched the same material as the stairs and the curtains were a dark colour. I guess you could definitely live lavishly when you had the money here because everywhere else on this side of the island looked under-developed. The houses were made of wood and the roads weren't even proper roads but you could surely live like this if you were bringing in 7 figures.
There was a sliding door behind the dining table. I couldn't stop my feet as they directed me to the sliding doors which I opened and stepped out onto the balcony that overlooked a large empty field. I fell in love with the view and I wish I had my camera to take some pictures. I sighed at my dormant passion and went back into the house closing the sliding door behind me.
I finally found the kitchen which looked like it came straight out of an HGTV magazine and hesitantly touched the stainless steel double door fridge. I always wanted to live a lavish lifestyle but back home my mom couldn't afford it and neither could my aunt here but here I was standing in a dreamlike kitchen. I could push back all the cons of working this job if it meant I could live like this.
Did I really love material things that much? There was no second thought in my head, I was a material girl. I spent my savings to buy a plane ticket to St. Amrys just because I wanted a life I couldn't get working a 9-5 in Jamaica.
Was there really anything wrong with loving material things? Better to have them now because it's not like I can have them when I'm dead.
I opened the fridge to see that it was fully stocked but basically empty at the same time because of my vegetarian diet. I grabbed a glass from the cupboard and poured myself some water before getting the orange juice from the fridge. There was a passage that led me to a fully stocked pantry. I looked around and saw that she had pancake mix. There was a freezer to the left side of the room which I took a peek into. I was surprised that Pep's house was this fully stocked but she spent most of her time at the office and I rarely ever saw her eat.
Close to an hour later, I had pancakes, eggs, sausages, potato wedges and, fruit salads on the dining table. Pep still hadn't come down so I took my pancakes and fruit salad to the balcony to appreciate the view while I ate. I was amazed by the land space and also at the fact that the apartment wasn't as small as I had originally thought. This was the main floor but it was the second floor and her bedroom was on the third.
"Tasheka?" Hearing my full name brought me out of the serene trance the field had put me in. The reality of where I was and who I was with came crashing down hard and fast.
"Yes, daddy?" I rested my feet back on the tiled balcony, unsure if she would be upset about me having them up on the railing.
Pep stepped out onto the balcony and wrapped her arms around my shoulders and kissed my jaw. I wasn't able to hide the surprised look on my face - Pep genuinely surprised me with her actions every day. She was hot and cold and I had to stay conscious to ensure that I wasn't overstepping.
"I see that you made me breakfast. I'm very grateful for that. If you want me to love you just say that." She kissed my jaw once more with a low chuckle.
"Oh, it's nothing. You deserve it." I felt a bit free, even my shoulders relaxed.
She stepped in front of me so that I could see her full frame lean against the decorative railing. "You like my house?" Her arms were folded over her chest, she wore a white rob that matched the one I currently had on.
So I was right, this was her place. "Yeah, I love it. Honestly, if you're the one that decorated the two locations and here then you have superb taste." I did a loud chef kiss.
"Yeah? It was me, I did hire an interior decorator but it ended up being my designs in the end. I'm glad you do because you'll be moving in soon." Her face was lit up with pride.
My heart stopped as I felt her place another kiss on my jaw and left me alone on the balcony. I wished that the screws would come loose and I'd just fall to my death but the builders wouldn't be that negligent and that would be a hefty lawsuit. At that moment I realized that I might just miss my simple life but then I looked out at the empty field ahead of me and I realized that wasn't me anymore. Finding my happiness here meant adapting to this space, thinking about who I was before and the freedom that I had would only bring me conflict and pain. Living here definitely didn't feel like a bad thing, if anything it felt like everything I ever dreamt of.
Even though happiness was less important than financial freedom to me right now, I still felt a bit pensive. Living with Pep would be a whole other ball field, it means being on guard 24/7 - for now, at least. What I wanted was coming faster than I had expected and I started questioning myself.
I got up and took my dishes to the kitchen. I washed up the dishes since I had already washed the utensils and pots that I used - I was a firm believer in cleaning as you go, really cuts the workload in half after you've finished eating. I stood still in the kitchen peeping into the dining room at her, watching her scroll through her phone while eating.
"May I have your WiFi password, please?" I was feeling a bit shy. Part of me didn't want to ask because I felt like she was going to turn me down.
"It's on the box." She pointed towards the living room. I took a deep breath and left her in the dining room.
It took me a good five minutes to find the box hoisted on the wall beside the fireplace. I got the password and hooked it back up. My phone started beeping as the notifications came in and I flicked the side switch to mute it. I didn't want Pep to get suspicious and yes, I was hiding the fact that Mya and I decided to work on things and also that I was talking to a girl that was interested in me and also my other friends. I didn't want her to isolate me from them and I knew how these things went. I've watched enough documentaries on abusive husbands.
After going through my notifications and watching some of the videos from last night I decided to send Mya a text to let her know that I was alive and well. I had 10 missed calls from her and a few messages. I may have left out the part where I was having sex for money and calling my boss daddy - all she needed to know was that I had the job at Mr Browns Hardware store and my new friends were coworkers. I'll call her when I got home, right now I had other things to think about.
Pep had finished her breakfast and came to sit beside me on the couch. I was surprised to see her turn the TV on, all this time I thought Pep was some cold sociopath who only worked and slept. I dropped my phone behind me and turned to face her, "did we, uhm, have sex last night?"
"Does it matter?" Her perfectly sculpted eyebrow raised in suspicion.
"Yes." I widened my eyes in feigned mistrust. She raised her arm over my shoulders and pulled me into her chest. I was in an awkward position but I didn't move.
"You were pretty high last night and I know you don't remember anything. No, we didn't have sex. I want you to be sober for our first time." Her fingers trailed soft circles on my back.
How could she be the devil one minute and then be this soft the next? My mind was confused and working in on itself. Yet still, I felt comfortable in this awkward position pressed against her chest. Her scent was intoxicating and I was swimming in it.
"Thank you." I felt relieved by her chivalrous gesture, I wasn't sure what to expect.
"Don't thank me yet." Pep pulled away from me with a wink.
I tried to maintain my usually calm demeanour but with Pep around, it was hard. Pep released her grip on me and left me sinking into the couch. My pinky finger twitched as I watched her walk away up the steps. Once she was out of my sight, I finally released the breath I was holding. I was an easy target for her, it all added up. I've been trying to convince myself that she didn't drug me that night but I couldn't put it past her. This was all a bit confusing, if she was going to keep me for herself then why sell me off to her client that night? Why bring me into her business as one of her girls?
"Everyone has a price."
Was it so easy to see mine? Did I wear my gullible trait on my forehead or maybe perhaps it was on my sleeve that night?
"Tash! Get ready!" Pep called from the third floor. If I was going to stay here, I wanted my own room at least.
I got up and slowly climbed the steps. I found my way back to her room and saw that she left clothes for me on the bed which were exactly my size and style, this was the least awkward thing I've seen with Pep. Pep wasn't in her room and my first thought was that she had an office here as well. She was stuck in work mode 24/7, I wondered to myself if she ever took a day off.
I pulled the door to the walk-in shower with an amazed expression and saw the broad rainfall showerhead, I could definitely get used to taking showers here. The shower was tiled in a beautiful dark green with gold fixtures.
Sometime later, I was finished in the bathroom and was once again downstairs sitting on the leather couch fully dressed in the clothes Pep had left for me. I was nose deep in my phone trying to catch up with everyone. I went through Snapchat and watched Melody's snap. Why was there a snap with me, shirtless and drenched in sweat, on the stage grinding on Jazz? Jazz was off-limits, she was Pep's personal pet so believe that I was beyond surprised to see her off all persons on stage with me.
Get yourself a girl from the Fantasy Squad 👅💦 we lit 🔥
I continued watching the snaps with wide eyes. I remembered none of this, the cocaine really did a number on my ass. I focused on how good I looked, I should get into modelling or promoting, I'd probably make an honest fortune. This life suited me, I deserved it.
"Let's go. I have to drop you home." Pep skipped down the last steps with her keys and phone in hand.
She was in dark blue jeans that were ripped at the knees, a baby blue polo and, suede grey loafers. Her dreads were loose and swinging with every step she took. I closed out Snap and the other applications I had running and got up to walk behind her. We exited through the large double doors and I took the time to look back at the house. It definitely wasn't an apartment, it was a house just as I had suspected. With the modern grey colour and black windows, you'd never expect that inside actually had colour and life. We got into her Mercedes Benz that was parked outside of the automatic gates and took off down the street with the AC blasting.
"Sima will be picking you up for your 6 PM. It's at the Levine location." I could see from my side view that she had turned to look at me but I was facing the window. "Pack some clothes to stay overnight - you'll be coming back home with me."
Just then her phone rang saving me from answering. Her voice, which was soft toward me, transformed back into its cold and icy tone. She seemed to be both sides of the Yin and Yang. She showed the world her dark and professional side but with me, it was a gamble. I didn't know what I would be receiving.
When she got off the phone, I asked, "what did you tell Mr Brown? I called him to tell him I wouldn't be coming in and he said he knew."
"When did you have that conversation?" Her voice was professional but it wasn't the icy tone she had while speaking on the phone just now.
"Two months ago," I wanted to roll my eyes, it seemed pretty obvious.
"I told him that I was interested in you." Pep was always so vague, what does that even mean?
"And?"
Silence.
"Okay." I sighed in defeat and was met with more silence.
Her silence made me realize one thing - Mr Brown was in on whatever she was in on. I decided that I wouldn't worry about it, the less I knew the better. I played the only game I had on my phone while I listened to AC blasting. I was sitting in a Mercedes Benz for Christ's sake, the only noise I heard was the beating of my own heart and Pep's lack of enthusiasm to listen to music as normal people do.
I had spent a lot of time thinking and thinking some more so I decided that I'd stop thinking for now since it only made the situation I was in more real. I mean, I had it good. As good as being coaxed into taking drugs and being under an abusive dictatorship could be. I wasn't being forced to do sexual things that I didn't want to do, which meant sleeping with men. This was a jackpot! Making money while sleeping with women. Taking drugs, I could handle. Being roughed up, I could handle it. It turned me on anyways but what happened next, I wasn't so confident about.
I couldn't wait to get home, I had a lot of talking to do with myself.