Blade and I walked around for a while in silence. I stayed a half step behind him, letting him lead. He had come to my room for a reason, but he must have changed his mind because he wasn't saying a thing.
"So...are you okay? With us telling Mick about you, I mean," I said, trying to break through the awkward silence. I just wanted him to talk to me again, even if it was about something stupid. Ever since he got that invite from Ace things had been tense and uncomfortable and I hated it. I was too tired of all the drama from the months before to deal with more now. I wanted to see him smiling again.
He shrugged. "Why wouldn't I be? He's your friend and Aidan's boyfriend. I think we can trust him to keep it a secret."
"Alright. Just making sure," I replied. We lapsed into silence again. I took to looking at my feet, counting my strides as we walked along. Blade suddenly stopped and I bumped into his shoulder. He was holding a door open, gesturing for me to go through it first to go outside. I arched an eyebrow but didn't say anything. He followed slightly behind me, hands stuffed in his pockets as we walked through the backyard under the blazing sun. I slowed to let him catch up, trying to figure out where we were going and why. He wouldn't go outside when the sun was like this for no reason. And he wasn't usually this quiet for this long either.
I tried to enjoy the warmth of the sun and the smell of mowed grass, trying to put Blade's weird mood aside for the moment until he decided to let me in on what he was thinking. Before I knew it, we had come upon the green house. Once again, he opened the door for me, and soon we were in the rose room. He finally stopped walking so I sat on the stone bench surrounding the center tree and the black roses. They were wide and waxy, and such a deep velvety black and so full of petals that it was unreal. They were perfect roses. I reached a finger out to trace the petal rim of one of them as Blade finally spoke up.
"Kiana?"
Turning my head, I studied him. He looked awkward and nervous, hands still stuffed deep into the pockets of his shorts, shoulders slightly hunched. He hardly ever looked like that and it was a little worrying. Had he found out about Eliza somehow? My stomach somersaulted uncomfortably as he kicked at a loose pebble.
"Yeah?" I asked tentatively.
"Are you sure you want to go to the ball?" he asked quietly.
I smiled a little in relief. I was being ridiculous. No way would he know about her. "Of course. Why wouldn't I?"
"Things are different now. With Ace I mean. The ball will be at Aros' place and I don't know how Ace is going to be after everything. Plus the only ball you ever went too ended pretty badly..."
"Blade, come on," I reached out and tugged his hands out of his pockets, pulling him down on the bench next to me. "Yeah my first ball sucked royally and being at Aros' place again will probably wig me out. But Ace will still be Ace. Deep down he'll always be the same guy. You two have been through a lot together and this is just one more thing to add to the list. Even if he is kind of different, it won't be a big deal. I'll be there and so will your family. You're not going to be alone out there, okay?"
"I guess..." he didn't look at all convinced. "But what if its weird? What if people start asking us about what happened?"
He had a point there. We hadn't been to some big party since before Aros. The only people from the vamp world we'd seen had been Blade's family and occasionally Alek's. Lexi had told us that everyone had been buzzing with gossip, trying to figure out what exactly Aros had tried to do and had done. Since Ace had killed him and there had been plenty of witnesses to Aros' craziness, there hadn't been a trial and the council had tried to keep the details on lockdown. People were still talking about it though, since it was obviously major news and because no one knew for sure what had happened except those involved.
"Fair point. But imagine how Ace must have felt. I'm sure plenty of people have been pestering him with questions for months now. I think we can handle one night of irritating questions. After all, we don't have to answer a single one," I stroked the tops of his knuckles with my fingertips soothingly. "As for it being weird...we can just go and see Ace for a bit and then leave early if it's that bad. Just dropping by for a bit is better than not going at all. It might remind Ace that you're still here for him when he needs you to be. And maybe this will be your chance to re-connect."
Blade sat quietly for a long time, but he was slowly starting to nod. "You're not leaving my side the whole night, got it?"
I grinned. "Wouldn't dream of it. Besides, I miss Ace too. It'd be great to see him again. Albeit, this does mean I'll have to find a dress..."
Blade groaned. "Great. We should have started shopping last year. Even that might not have been enough time."
"Sorry I want to wear something I'll like," I said, hitting his arm playfully. "And I was kidding. I can just wear my prom dress. It's super pretty and I may not get many opportunities to wear it again."
"Mhmm, well I definitely wouldn't mind seeing you in it a few more times..." he let go of my hand to brush his knuckles along my thigh, a small smile playing on his lips. A burst of relief hit me. Finally he looked like himself again.
I rolled my eyes at his comment. Of course he wouldn't mind. A few weeks after I brought my dress home I'd tried it on in my room, just to make sure I really really liked it. Blade hadn't come the day I had gotten it since it had been a girls day outing; just Katie, Leah, Jill, and I shopping for prom. He hadn't seen the dress or known anything about it at that point, but when he did see me wearing it and posing in front of the mirror well...let's just say the dress didn't stay on very long. Not that I was complaining. But if I was going to wear something that fab, then I kind of wanted it to stay on for more than ten minutes.
"Hey now, since when did you like me best when I was dressed?" I teased.
He shrugged, taking my hand in his again. "I like you in every way."
I pecked him on the cheek. "Good answer." I hated to bring it up a sore subject again, but I needed to know. "Are you okay now? Or at least, more okay than before?"
He sobered slightly at my question. "I don't know. I just feel like this stupid ball has disaster written all over it. But that could just be because every time there's been some sort of event recently something bad has happened."
He had a point there. The blood feast, Halloween, Aros' ball, my birthday...we didn't seem to have much luck when it came to parties.
"Well like I said, we don't have to stay long. Just pop in, say hello, maybe dance once or twice then we can leave." Maybe Blade's worry was catching, because I was started to get a funny twist in my stomach at the thought of going. "I mean, how bad could it possibly be? At least this time all your family is going to be there, Alek has his head on straight, and Aros is gone."
"True..." but he still didn't look too convinced. And frankly, I was starting to feel the same. I shook the feeling off and stood, brushing some dirt off my shorts.
"Come on, let's go inside. I'm hungry," I said abruptly. If he noticed my own doubts starting to show, he didn't mention it. He just stood and followed me back out into the beautiful June sunshine.
********
"Is it too late to back out?" Blade asked, seeming to read my own thoughts. We were standing in front of Aros' castle...well, Ace's castle now. We hadn't been here since the incident. We had watched from the car as crowds of people bustled inside in their finest evening wear, chatting loudly and already enjoying themselves. We had finally made it out of the car once there was a smaller flow of people, but we still couldn't get the courage to go inside.
"Blade! Kiana!" I heard Lexi shout, coming up on our right. She gave me a hug and twirled me. "I can't believe you're wearing your prom dress again. Next time there's a ball I'm taking you shopping." Lexi had opted for a beautiful one shoulder dark blue dress, that clung snugly to her body all the way down. She looked like some sort of dark mermaid, ready to drown someone at a moment's notice.
"I guess that answers that question," I muttered. I shrugged Lexi's comment off. I wasn't exactly rolling in cash right now, plus finding a dress appropriate for a ball on a budget was impossible. I had already spent quite a bit on the prom dress so I wasn't about to spend more when I had college to worry about.
Blade squeezed my hand tightly and I squeezed back just as hard. I was already starting to sweat, not just because of the warm June evening, but stress. I didn't want to go in. I had vowed to never step inside this building ever again and here I was, standing on the doorstep for a party. If I hadn't been so scared, the situation would have been laughable.
"Why are you guys still standing out here for? The party is inside..." Lexi looked kind of confused, kind of amused, and kind of uncertain.
"Just admiring the view," Blade said, not a trace of emotion in his voice.
"Uh huh..." Lexi said, unconvinced. "Well I'll be inside if you two ever decide to join in on the fun." With that, she gracefully strode into the castle.
"We should go in. Standing out here is just going to make it worse," I said softly, stepping closer to take his arm instead. "The faster we go in the faster we can go home," I added.
He took a deep, slow breath. "Alright. Let's do it."
With a final, heart pounding moment to stare up at the terrifying castle, we went up the steps and inside to join the party.
********
"Just how much longer do you think it'll be before we can leave?" Blade muttered under his breath. We had already been here an hour and I was seriously ready to run screaming in the other direction. I was completely creeped out just standing in the building, surrounded by a crowd of vampires and humans alike enjoying the party by dancing, drinking, and chatting the time away. Did they even realize where they were standing? What had happened here? That Ace had stabbed Aros to death just at the front of the room?
My hands were clammy and my stomach had been churning all night. What little food I had consumed was definitely threatening to make a reappearance. Blade looked about as awful as I felt.
"Whenever Ace shows up," I replied hesitantly. I would be lying if I said I was considering just leaving now and saying that we'd catch up with Ace another time. I put a sweaty hand to my throat, trying desperately to forget how Aros' knife had felt when he cut me, the way his flesh gave when I stabbed him with that disgusting stake. I had done a pretty good job of pushing evetything all that had happened here to a far corner of my mind, but being back was just giving me technicolor flashbacks. Feeling the slight bump of the scar on my throat definitely wasn't helping either.
"Would you guys go and dance or something? You look like you're both about to pass out," Lexi said as she passed by, hand in hand with Alek. He nodded a hello to us before Lexi swept him off to the dance floor, both as happy as clams. Of course they had nothing to be panicked about.
"Maybe she's right," Blade said suddenly. My head whipped around to look at him in surprise. He sighed when he saw my look. "We might as well try to distract ourselves until he shows up. Just standing here is driving me fucking crazy."
I swallowed hard. Dancing across the place where we had nearly died wasn't exactly on my list of fun things to do. But he had a point. Standing here was driving me crazy too. I wanted to run out of here as fast as possible, so maybe dancing would give my body the chance to release some of that anxiety and restlessness.
Blade pulled me out onto the floor for a waltz and I tried my hardest to enjoy it. It did distract me a little since I was out of practice and had to focus on my feet so I wouldn't stumble and fall, so I suppose the idea had worked. Blade let me stand on his feet so it'd be easier to dance and I finally started to relax. We passed by Blade's parents and stopped to say hello and chat, promising to have dinner soon, before Blade whisked me off again. Of course, just as we both were starting to enjoy ourselves, I spotted a familiar head of white hair only a few feet away.
I jumped in surprise and Blade nearly knocked me over, but thankfully caught me at the last second.
"Are you okay?" he asked, steadying me again.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I shook my head and watched as Ace greeted people, slowly making his way through the dancing couples towards us. Blade followed my gaze and went rigid when he saw Ace walking over.
He looked different. That long messy hair he used to have was gone, instead it was cut short and close to his scalp. He wore a black suit so pristine and perfect it didn't look real. There was a darkness around his eyes, exhaustion painting the skin purple, but everything else about him looked perfectly put together. He looked calm and controlled, not his usual goofy and slightly rumpled self. Finally, he stood in front of us, hands behind his back as he stood straight and tall.
No one said a word. Blade was squeezing my hand so hard that my eyes watered and a small squeak escaped me. The silence between us was killing me.
"Hi," I blurted, unable to take another second of awkward staring. It felt like everything that had happened hung between the three of us, making it impossible to breathe, to think. All I kept seeing was Ace's broken form crying over Aros' lifeless body.
Ace took a slow, deep breath and finally smiled. He looked tired. "Hey," he said softly. He hesitated a moment, then opened his arms. Blade released his death grip on my hand and I cautiously stepped into his hug. At first it was awkward and stiff and I definitely wanted out. But then I suddenly realized it was Ace for crying out loud and God only knew how awful these past months had been for him and he looked so tired and Aros was gone and we hadn't kept in touch and God damn it Ace needed a hug.
So I gave him one. I held him tight, squeezing him around the waist with my cheek to his shoulder as I tried to show him how thankful I was for all he had done and how sorry I was that we hadn't done anything for him in return. He suddenly hugged me back tighter, lifting me off the floor with a twirl.
"Darling you look just as gorgeous as ever," he said, setting me back down with a smile that was a little more real.
I curtsied, feeling relief start to wash through me like a calming tide. "Thank you," I said, smiling a little. I reached up and touched his new hair. "You look so grown up and responsible now. It's weird."
"Trust me, if anyone knows how weird it is it's definitely me," he said, ruffling my own hair. I swatted his hands away, laughing a little. He turned to Blade then, who had said nothing and done nothing the whole time.
"Hey," Ace said, looking mildly hesitant all of a sudden.
Blade nodded his head, eyes tight. I shifted restlessly from foot foot. Come on Blade, he's your best friend...
"Been a while, huh?" he finally said, smiling awkwardly.
Ace barked out a laugh and pulled Blade into a hug. "Come here you insufferable bastard."
Blade was more than a little surprised, but returned the hug with equal enthusiasm after a few moments. He whispered something I didn't catch and Ace nodded, patting him on the back before they pulled away.
"Come on, let's move out of the way before these couples run us over," Ace said, gesturing with his slim hand away from the dance floor. The boys followed me back to the tables, but we didn't sit.
"So how have you guys been? Things must be going well since you guys are actually talking and being civil," Ace teased, touching the back of his head before he let his hand drop.
I rolled my eyes at him. "We're not always fighting, Ace. Give us some credit."
"Hey, I don't know. You two used to go at it a lot before," he said, raising his hands in surrender.
"Well that was because of a certain ex-girlfriend most of the time..." I elbowed Blade's side. He looked a little out of sorts, like he was still uncomfortable with the whole situation.
"Careful there darling, she might just hear you," Ace said warningly, a playful grin suddenly appearing.
"Mona's here?" Blade and I said immediately, equal parts horrified. He had to be kidding!
"Of course not. I was just teasing. So for real though, you guys are alright?" Ace asked, his earlier humour suddenly vanishing.
I took Blade's hand and squeezed it, nodding at Ace. "We're better than alright." And we were. Now that my future, or at least my near future, was planned out things were a little less scary. And now that the Ace sitch was starting to get better, we were pretty much in normal territory again.
"That's good. I thought after Ar—I mean, I'm glad you guys worked everything out," he said, looking mildly flustered. "Have you guys tried some of the appetizers at this shindig? They're to die for."
"Um...yeah, they're really good," Blade said, wincing a little. We all knew what Ace was going to say. After Aros and what he had done. It had taken a bit of time to fall back into routine, and to heal, but we had adjusted and things had returned to normal. I went to school, things with Blade's family got better on all fronts, Mom got engaged...life was good. Sure it was a bit awkward and tense the first few weeks, but as the physical scars healed, so did our emotional ones. More or less.
"How are you?" I asked cautiously. Blade and I had had each other after the incident, and even his family, but Ace hadn't had anyone but Annie. If she was even still around.
"Me? I'm fine, darling," he said, waving his hand. "Sure I can't party as much and that seriously cuts into my fun times with girls, but adult responsibilities were bound to hit me at some point."
Blade and I exchanged a glance. He seemed so...casual. Upbeat even. It felt forced, especially considering how free and laid back Ace usually was.
"What happened to Annie?" Blade asked.
Ace shrugged, just as cool and unaffected as ever. "She wasn't the one for me I guess," he said, but he didn't meet Blade's eyes once.
"When did you break up?" I asked. I hated to be one of those prying people, but I really wanted to know how Ace was doing and what had happened in his life in these past few months of dead air.
"I don't know. Sometime after I got the job? It's a bit of a blur really," he said with another shrug. "It's no big deal. There were plenty of girls before Annie and there will be plenty now."
"Have you met anyone since Annie?" I prodded. Aros' words kept playing in my head. He had been right about it being a lonely job. If Blade and Ace hadn't managed to keep in contact and Annie was gone, who did Ace have left? Had he really been alone for all this time?
"Nah, but that's okay. There hasn't been much time for girls lately. So much to do, you know? Anyways, I have to go see to some things so you guys have fun," he said, and with a quick hug for me and a pat on the back for Blade, he swept off through the crowd.
"Bye..." I said, but he was already gone. Talking to Ace had been...odd, to say the least. He seemed so unconcerned and unfazed. Maybe he had changed since Aros' death and taking over his job.
"Do you want to go?" Blade asked, touching my back gently.
I was quick to nod. We had seen Ace and there was nothing left to do here besides stand around being uncomfortable. After saying quick goodbyes to his parents and Lexi, we escaped the castle for a second time in just a few months. I should have felt relieved at being able to leave, but if anything, I felt even more unsettled than before.
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Hey so Ace is back yay! Sorry its been so long work has been crazy and my sister has employed me for some art projects for her renovated condo. Anyhoo im really tired but wanted to get this update out and since my computer is pretty much completely screwed rn I gave in and am doing it via mobile app. Now thatvI have updated its time to attempt to sleep before work again tomorrow. Sad.
Much love and good vibes,
xxLaura