" Getting warm enough? " he asked out of the blue.
You hugged your legs harder against your chest, eyeing the flames still.
" Like if you care, " you answered back with a hint of mean tone in your voice, but didn't get any response in return, he either heard that or not but ignored, however, seeing a squared pattern fabric blocking your sight. He was reaching you a blanket that you gladly accepted, wrapping it around your shoulders while you caught him searching through his leather satchel and picks out of what it seemed to be a piece of cloth, unfolding it and there it was a half-eaten dry sausage as he slits it in half, insisting one piece to you. Watching him with doubts first, but grabbed it out of his hand, munching it in one go.
" I bet Colm rather tortures than feed his captives, " he let out another silly joke while chewing at his piece.
The atmosphere became quiet after his last sentence and lasted for a good while. You could hear the crickets chirping and owls hooting somewhere around the environment. Finally, the temperature in your body is raising, feeling warm and comfy which you longed for. Back there at the base camp, you were nearly giving up the hope to see a campfire ever again, but here you are, not alone of course. Should you be grateful for the help? a part of you was saying yes while the other was the slightest frustrated for the thought behind the rescue which bothered you madly, therefore, you decided to stay muted, accepting the fact that you're unscathed and safe.
" See? this wasn't bad at all, " he uttered, " at least you're breathing, that's all that matters. " Removing the same rifle you used earlier on his lap and examines it. You peeked at him in between.
" You did a fine job out there I must admit, " aiming his focus at you now, and you rapidly stared back into the fire to avoid his gaze. What now? was he trying to sweep his bad behavior under the carpet and act kindly? you couldn't read this man properly, he was mysterious indeed.
" I'm glad Colm is out of the picture, " you said normally, " it's like someone has extinguished the burning flame of revenge inside me. He's been ... "
" Abusive and cruel? " he interrupted.
" Yes ... " rubbing your palms near the fire.
He puts the gun away and moves closer to you, resting his arm on the bent knee with the head pointing down and hat covering the face partly.
" Listen, I er ... I'm not really good at being supportive, but I'm sorry to hear the hell you've been going through and experienced, it mustn't have been easy. "
You scoffed and shook your head in despair.
" Certainly not ... "
An awkward moment of silence occurred once more, then he cleared his throat and leaned his head back up in the air. You remarked his gestures, shooting a quick look at him while he was staring straight up in the pitch dark sky.
" Look, have you ever witnessed something so fascinating before? "
You moved your orbs away from him aiming for the billion dots, that was shining brightly on the base layer of blackness, spreading across the whole sky, making an outstanding contrast that would capture everyone's eyes whoever would be here in your place. It was breathtaking indeed.
" No I haven't ... " you answered amazed. The stars and its delighted way of twinkling washed away your frustration over him.
" Imagine something so beautiful being near, but yet so far and out of reach from you, " looking at you whilst he spoke up the words.
" Yes ... " you replied, still being enchanted by them, but then turned your head towards him snaring him glancing intensively at you. You nervously rubbed your palms again, evading him and came up with something to say to be excused from the uneasy occasion.
" Do you believe in life after death? "
He picked a thick branch from the ground, plucking the dry leaves away.
" I don't believe in anything until I see it with my bare eyes, " he responded, " do you, miss?"
" I ... I honestly don't know what to believe in anymore. "
" Good, one burden less to worry I suppose, " he phrased, " my turn to ask the challenging question of them all, now, have you ever been in love? "
The way his deep and husky masculine tone reach out of his vocal cord, down his strong throat when he stated that question, gave you tangles on your neck and down your spine, and tickles down your belly. You swallowed, tucking some hair strands behind your ear, playing cool as you won't let the feelings characterize itself remarkably.
" No, " you lied, " have you? "
He chuckled playfully.
" You sure about that? " eyeing you quick then back on the branch, " cuz I've been told something else. "
What does he mean by that? Who has been telling what? Is there something he knows that I'm unaware of? Or did I express it too obvious? I don't understand.
" I once did ... " he kept on going, poking the branch in the fire.
" What happened? " you wondered hoping it wasn't too inconvenient to ask.
" I er ... " depressingly shook his head once, but continued where he abrupted, " I lost them all. You see, I was once a man with a family before transforming into the monster I am today. Performing stupid things that I shouldn't do, behaving in a way my manners normally wouldn't allow me to ... "
That was heartbreaking to hear, you didn't quite know how to react or what to say at this moment but managed to show compassion, it's the least you could do.
" I'm sorry to hear that, " sounding sympathetic to his tragedy of loss.
" It was a long time ago, I've kinda moved on. "
It was strange to hear him open up for you and confess where he sounded so regretful, maybe he has gone through horrible times in his life, seemly his soul was filled with sorrow from the past worse than yours presumably, you never would have thought to witness the calm and decent side of him but were happy you did.
" I guess we all stumble upon obstacles in life, sir? "
" Morgan, Arthur Morgan. "
" Right Mr. Morgan, we just have to learn how to live up to it, somehow. "
He chuckled again.
" That ain't easy for some ... "
" Of course it is, why are you so hard on yourself? what makes you think that you don't deserve a second chance in life? to forgive and accept the problems and past to live on? "
He discontinued playing with the branch in the fire and sighed shortly.
" Once you step into a territory where you've been promised a life in peace and freedom, you don't betray your crew so even called family and willingly fight against a life away from civilization reigned by the law. I want my justice, miss ... " he cut himself in the middle of his speech, " it's meaningless to explain everything in details, I hope one day you will be able to find the truth behind our lifestyle and habitat, or we might never understand each other. "
" I don't really care if you assumingly are a criminal or a son to a goddamn major, it's the personality, loyalty and amount of respect we put on each other that counts, besides, I don't submit that you're as bad as you define yourself, I think that you're a man who's having it hard to distinguish and show your feelings for any reasons that might be. You may look terrorizing from the outside, but I truly believe you're harmless and smooth deep inside, and might even carry a genuine heart for those you could rely on, a heart like a soft sponge. "
He let out a blaring laugh to your big surprise.
" What's so funny? " confusion crossed all over you.
He stopped right away, regaining his serious appearance and scratched through his stubble down his jawline.
" That was quite of a compliment, guess I'm not used hearing them often. "
You didn't comprehend why it was so entertaining for him, but you guessed he had his causes. Somehow, the gentle and soft side of him was causing you to let go of the tiniest uptight tension, that you had dragged within you of constantly thinking he was bad and menacing. So far he's been distancing and difficult, but now he revealed his true self. That pleased you because you nearly got trapped by getting brainwashed, hearing bad and evil rumors about his type and people like him among the people. But they were wrong and Mary was wrong too for the first time in her life. Maybe you weren't so naive and dumb after all, knowing that your instincts were right since start about him, being different from other outlaws even though it sounded ridiculous for the population, sometimes you have to think out of the box, stop presuppose people's judges and trust your gut feeling, it isn't always wrong, that is a lesson you will memorize.
" No one has made me laugh for ages, " he said with a wide smile upon his face, " thank you. "
The flames of the fire reflected in the merged cyan color of his eyes, it caused a harmonious sensation when it got locked in yours, shimmering perfectly for you. His pupils wandered round your visage and glued on the big blemish that the dead beast had contoured before. He touched it with his fingertips at first, to get the okay sign from you, then stretched his hand on your injured cheek, caressing carefully, as he was searching for your eyes to meet again. You have definitely never been this close before, maybe this is the only closeness you could get. You wanted him to remain like this, a perfect chance and opportunity to feel his warm and solid hands while the rhythm in your heart, pumping faster as the blood was rushing in your body, making your arms and legs weary and your face heating, but too tremulous and shy only by his touch on your tender skin.
You placed your hand on his strong and twice as big as yours to slink out of the grip.
" I- I better go and get some sleep, " moving his hand away, getting up on your two feet, you could still sense how he was watching you from behind when you paced towards the tent.
" By the way, " you maxed heading inside and turned your head briefly to the side," you should smile more often cowboy, it suits you, " then went inside.