Drake- Kemmie I'm dying, I've got a brain tumour.
Tears streamed down my face as I ran out the room and flew down the stairs and ran onto the beach and I just kept running and running and running and eventually I stopped running realising that I had nothing to run to and no where to run.
As I turned around everyone was so far away now and when I looked in front of me all that was left was miles and miles of sand.
Me- Please don't take him away from me.
I said falling onto my knees and grabbing sand in each hand with my head facing down like I'd just been defeated after fighting a long battle.
Me- Please
I whispered into the air.
Me- Please.
Flawless was right it was funny how things can just go wrong in a matter of minuets. I knew it was too good to be true, Drake was everything a girl could possibly want. He was caring and kind and gentle and loving and he was mine....not officially but he was mine.
I thought that we'd get together one day and be together for a long time, just having fun and messing about. But he was dying and even though I knew everyone had to die one day it was still painful to know that one of these days I'm going to wake up and he won't be here anymore. He'll never be able to hug me and tell me things will be ok or to cheer me up when I'm down.
That's what hurt me the most, just never being able to touch him or feel his lips against mine or to even watch him sleep peacefully or to lay on him and listen to his hear beat steadily in his chest.
I finally understood why he always kept telling me time was limited and why he often went into his own world and would return to reality looking solemn. I now understood why he didn't buy himself any clothes that day and why he said to me "it's just money Kemmie, when you die you leave it behind" It all made sense.
It was amazing how he just accepted it and how I never heard him complain even when he was ill he just lay in bed and rested and when he got up he just got on with it.
Me- My poor baby.
Then I realised one last thing why he had said to me "I've got one last chance to find a girl and make her really happy" as I remembered that day tears fell down my cheek onto the dry sand making it lump together like lumpy porridge.
Me- Please don't take him away from me..........please
(Drake)
I hauled myself out of bed and began putting on my shoes.
Mum- What are you doing?
Me- I'm going to find Kemmie.
Mum- Drake give her time, plus your not well just lay down.
Drake- NO.......I'm going to find her, you wanted me to tell her and now I did, now I've got to deal with the consequences. This is my problem mum and I need to sort it out FOR MYSELF and BY MYSELF and plus I'm starting to feel better anyway.
As I left the room the image of Kemmie's face when I told her the news popped into my head and it pained my soul. I knew I'd have to tell her someday but I didn't want her to find out like this it had all gone wrong and now I needed to let her know exactly how I felt about her.
As I walked along the beach I was fully alert I didn't want to miss her, as I walked it began to rain and people were running into the hotel for shelter and those people who wasn't staying at the hotel just ran under tress and in their cars for shelter.
But a little rain wouldn't stop me from looking for her I had to find her.
(Kemmie)
The rain began to fall as I looked out at the sea that seemed to go on forever the waves rolled in and smashed against the rocks and sand. The rain felt cool and warm as it ran down my face and down my back as I looked up at the sky.
It reminded me of last night when me and Drake played on the beach and that started up the tears all over again.
I got up to make my way over to a few rocks that sat neatly under a bunch of palm trees. I sat on one and continued to look out towards the sea, somewhere far of in the distance I could see a few fisherman on there boat.
I smiled as one of them raised there hat to me and i waved back at him.
(Drake)
I walked for ages along the beach I began to worry just encase she had gone into the water and something happened to her, just as I was about to turn back and get some help I spotted her under a few palm trees sitting on a large rock.
My heart felt at ease as I made my way towards her, she looked at me and then she stood up with tears rolling down her cheek and then she ran towards me and I caught her and held her in my arms for what felt like forever.
Me- I'm so sorry baby, I didn't want you to find out like that.
Kemmie- Its ok Drake, I'm sorry I feel selfish. Moaning about silly things when you've got a life threatening illness.
Me- Its ok Kemmie.
Kemmie- No its not, because one day your not.....
She stopped and walked away.
Me- Its ok, say it
She shook her head.
Me- Look at me.
I said holding onto her.
Me- I know Kemmie one day I'm not going to be here anymore and your scared, baby I'm scared too but I can't let it ruin my life. I did that already and I lost many friends and my ex girl because of it but not now, you mean everything to me...Look at me.
I said as she looked away and began to cry again.
Me- You mean everything to me and the only thing I'm scared of is that I'm going to die and then you'll forget all about me...I dunno what will happen to me or where I'll end up but I know that when I do die I'll die a happy man Kemmie and that's all down to you. You've made my life so much easier baby. Having you to care about and you to make happy is what keeps me going.
I looked into her eyes and saw the hurt and the love but at the same time I saw the anger and frustration.
Me- Please don't be sad, help me to have a good time while I'm still here. Can you do that for me.
She nodded.
Me- Thank you baby.
I hugged her while the rain kept falling and the waves rolled in and tickled our feet.
(Kemmie)
The tears kept coming and they wouldn't stop, as he pulled away and looked into my eyes just seeing his bright honey and nutty brown coloured eyes made me cry even more.
Drake- Sssssh
He whispered while kissing away my tears.
Then I stood on my tip toes and kissed him I put all the love, hurt, anger, frustration everything into that one kiss. Then we lay on the beach just staring at each other then I took off his shirt and then I removed my own clothes. This was going to be my first time but it was with the person I love the boy I can't imagine my life without.
Drake- Baby are ready?
I nodded my head, I wanted him to love me.
He looked at my naked body in aw and then he kissed my neck making me moan slightly then he kissed my breast gently while caressing the inside of my thigh. His hands felt so good going through my hair and as he got on top of me the heat from his body made me want him even more.
The rain fell onto his 8 pack and as his shorts hung low the V line leading down to his manhood made me shiver with delight.
The rain continued to fall and the drops hung from his koolie hair which was laying gently on his chest.
He slowly took off his shorts and his boxers and then he climbed on top of me again and then he eased it in very, very gently. So gentle that It barely hurt me at all even though he was packing. He slid in and out gently and it felt so good along with the warm rain falling on our skin and the sound of the waves washing away the sand.
Drake- I love you so much Kemmie.
My heart stopped as he said I love you while looking directly into my eyes without a smirk or a grin the only thing I could see in his eye's was actual love and sincerity.
Me- Baby I love you too.
I moaned as he began to build up pace and I began to cling onto his back and run my fingers through his hair.
Me- Don't leave me baby please.
I moaned as I was about to reach my boiling point.
Drake- Never baby, I'm gunner be right here.
He said placing his hand on my heart.
Then we both erupted and fell on each other, we lay silent for a long time and then I broke the silence.
(Drake)
She looked at me with her beautiful Hazel eyes.
Kemmie- Did you mean it?
Me- What?
Kemmie- That you loved me.
Me- From the bottom of my heart boo, I've never been more sure of anything in my life.
Kemmie- Why you?
Me- I asked myself that many times baby girl, and I've come to the simple conclusion of that's just how my life's meant to be.
Kemmie- Why now?
Me- What do you mean.
Kemmie- Why did you only come into my life recently and make me fall so deep in love with you and now your almost ready to leave.
Me- Its better that I met you now, than not have met you at all.
She was silent after that looking out at the sea in her own world.
Kemmie- Is that why you don't want me to be your wifey?
Me- What you on about?
Kemmie- Your telling me you love me and all this but yet you haven't asked me out yet.
I smiled.
Me- Damn boo I would like that more than anything in the world but I thought you might not see the point, seeing as you know....
Kemmie- Drake I don't care about that I just want you baby, I want to be able to call you mine. That's all I want.
Me- Kemmie Lovell would you be mine?
Kemmie- Yes I'd love too.
She kissed me once again and I could feel all the love building up inside of me, a feeling I've never felt before. I felt happy genuinely happy, a feeling I thought I'd never experiences again. I loved this girl more than she'll EVER and I mean EVER know.......it was a shame that one day it would all come to an end.
The weeks went by in a FLASH after that, and before we knew it we were at home again. Since coming back me and Kemmie try to spend every opportunity together. My step dads been around to keep my mum occupied. I'm glad she doesn't worry as much any more now that she's gone back to work and my little sister is going to school.
It was four days until Christmas and we all went Christmas shopping. Me, Kemmie, Flawless and Kyla and our mums and dads.
Me- don't buy me anything babe.
Kemmie- Oh shut up you.
She said walking into the shop and scowling at me as I tried to enter behind her.
Kemmie- it's a surprise Drake, you stay outside.
Me- Iiight kl.
She went and took a good 15minuest and then she came back out grinning.
Kemmie- Your going to love it more than anything in the world.
Me- More than you.........I doubt that.
She smiled.
Kemmie- Where did I find someone as perfect as you?
Me- I dunno but I'm glad you found me.
The rest of the day was total MADNESS....I struggled to find a present for Kemmie so I got her more than one but they were very special..........
Later on that day (Kemmie)
I was sat on my bed wrapping up everyone's present. Then I heard a lite tap on the door.
Me- Hold on a minute let me hid the presents....ok COME IN!!
My mum walked in smiling and she sat on my bed and just looked at me for a few seconds before she spoke.
Mum- I'm so proud of you Kemmie.
Me- Why?
Mum- The way you delt with the situation about Drake and his illness.
Me- Oh.
Mum- Its going to be hard for you, but I love you and I'm here to talk if you ever feel like its too much. I know you care very much about him I see it in your eyes when he calls you and your eyes lit up or when you see him the way a smile grows on your face....but I'm so scared that you won't know how to cope if something happens to him.
Tears began to roll down both our cheeks.
Me- How do you prepare to lose someone, how do you prepare for something when you don't even know when its going to happen...all I can do is be grateful for everyday and every second we have with each other. I'm scared mum, I'm scared to lose him but what can I do?
I broke down as she held me in her arms and rocked me back and forth.
Mum- Nothing but carry on doing what your doing now and making the most of the time you've still got together. His mum has invited us over to spend Christmas with them, this may be his last and he insisted that he wants you there...would you like that.
Me- Very much
I said as new tears met old ones and began to roll down my cheek. I held onto my mum like she was getting taken away from me too and we both cried I don't know for how long but we both just sat in my room and cried.
It was the day before Christmas and me and my mum helped Neesee to season and make things in preparation for tomorrow. When we was finished My mum and Neesee went to have a girly chat and I went upstairs to see my baby.
I knocked on the door and he opened it covered in bits of tape and Christmas wrapper.
Me- You silly thing.
I said kissing him while he laughed.
Drake- I'm finally finished boo.
I smiled.
Me- That's good baby.
I said hugging him as we lay in bed together we watched a movie called their eyes were watching god with Halle Berry as a woman who spends her whole life searching for a good man who loves her as much as she loves him but when she finds that person he dies but she's happy anyway just knowing that she had the opportunity to meet him.
I looked over at Drake who unlike other boys even when a film was about Romance and people searching for love he'd still watch it with great interest unless the movie was really crap. When the movie came to an end I cried as I always did, it gets me all the time.
Drake- Damn that was some crazy shit right der.
He said holding me and wiping away my tears.
Me- I know I love that movie.
Drake- Yh it wasn't too bad I feel disappointed though.
Me- Why?
Drake- Because it took her half her life to find the man of her dreams and then he gets taken away from her in a flash.
Me- I know, bit like us don't you think.
Drake- Yh a bit like us boo but I ain't going no where, not right now anyway.
He said smiling his perfect smile and then eventually we both fell asleep in each others arms.
Sometime during the night I heard someone calling my name.
Drake- Merry Christmas baby.
He said kissing me as my eyes fluttered open.
Me- Merry Christmas darling.
Drake- Come and look at this baby.
He said wrapping me up in the bed covers and pulling me towards his balcony.
As I stepped onto the balcony I saw the ground below was all covered in snow and it was still falling like small white butterflies dancing in the sky.
The road was quiet not a soul was walking out and about everyone was warm and comfy in there homes.
Me- Baby its beautiful.
Drake- Just like my beautiful wifey.
He said wrapping himself in the covers with me while we continued to watch the snow fall peacefully and cover the world in a bag white blanket like the one around us.
Drake- I love you boo.
Me- I love you more.
I said as we retreated back to our bed and huddled closer to each other to keep warm.
Me- I'm going to miss these little moments with you.
Drake- Not more than me baby...DAMN I love you so much.
He said as a tear fell down his cheek.
Me- Awwww baby don't cry.
Drake- But I don't wanna lose you Kemmie.
Me- Neither do I baby.
I said holding his face in my hands.
Drake- I'm scared.......
He cried large tears out of his beautiful honey and nutty brown coloured eyes.
Me- Ssssssh lets not think about that right now babe, were together right now and that's all that matters............
Eventually he fell asleep and then I too cried myself to sleep.
The next day was Christmas and everyone was up early wanting to open their presents.
Me & Drake- Morning
Everyone said morning back and we all wished each other a merry Christmas.
Then all the presents got handed out everyone opened their presents from each other one by one and then we all thanked each other.
Neesee- Drake where are your presents?
Drake- Oh yh there upstairs two seconds.
He said disappearing upstairs when he walked in he had everyone's present in a gift bag.
I sat down on the floor and waited to hear what he had to say.
Drake- I gave everyone's present a lot of thought, as you all know this might be my last Christmas with you and.....
I watched as tears formed in his eyes and I stood up and gave him a warm hug.
Me- You can do it babe.
Drake- So I wanted to give you all something that you can take with you where ever you go to remind you that I'm always with you.
Drake- My first gift is to my mum, this bracelet is just a small gift to thank you for everything you've done for me it might not be much compared to all the times you cared for me and showed me love and stayed up all night to make sure I was ok...but on the bracelet says "I'll always be with you love Drake"
This other gift is to Tyron (Mums husband) it's a chain with two people shaking hands this to thank you for being around when I needed you and for taking care of my mum, I hope you'll continue to do so.
My next gift is for Ashley this teddy has a picture of me and you on the tummy and at the back it says "I'll love you forever, keep your head up my sweet baby sister love Drake" Whenever you feel upset or you want a cuddle just hug this teddy and remind yourself of all the good times we had together.
This gift is for Tiar (Kemmie's mum) this picture is of our time at St Lucia and on top of it says "Thank you for sharing this special moment with me"
And this last present is for the girl I love with all my heart............I'll give them to you later.
Me- AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW YOU HAD ME GETTING ALL EXCITED but I don't mind the wait.
As I looked around the room I realised I was the only one laughing everyone else were looking at their presents crying.
Me- Big family huggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg!!!!!!
I said standing up and opening my arms.
Eventually everyone stood up and hugged each other then we went outside to play in the snow.
As I stood in the driveway sipping on some hot chocolate a small tear rolled down my cheek, knowing that this might be our last Christmas together pained my soul. Everyone looked so happy and carefree.
My mum- PICTURE TIME!!!!!!!!
We all ran into the picture.........................................
Later on that day we all sat around the table and ate Christmas dinner.
Drake- Mum this is some GOOOOOOOOOOOD CHICKEN.
I was to busy stuffing my face to say a word, after dinner we all played twister.
Then we sat down and bussed joke with each other then as night rolled in everyone retreated to their rooms to get some rest.
As me and Drake lay huddled together under the covers we spoke for a bit.
Me- This is the best Christmas ever.
Drake- I know, and I got to spend it with my baby.
I smiled.
Me- I Love you so much Drake.
I said crying.
Drake- Baby don't cry, come here.
He held me in his arms and then he pulled away and kissed away my tears.
Drake- I love you too baby, oh and I need to give you your presents.
Me- Oh yh
I said cheering up a bit.
Drake- Iiight here's the first one.
He handed me a little red box and when I opened it inside was a necklas with a small heart pendent and when I read the pendent it said "Don't cry because I'm no longer here, cry because of all the good times we've shared. Remember that I'm not that far away in your heart is where I'll always stay"
Tears ran down my face as I read the small writing engraved in the pendent.
Me- Awwww thank you baby.
Drake- Sssssh, here's your other one.
It was a big heart cushion that said Drake loves Kemmie and when you lay on it, it went up and down like it was breathing and it became nice and warm.
Me- Awwww I love it.
Drake- When you sad and lonely close your eyes and lay on it and think of me. The last thing I want you to have is my Lakers basketball shirt, I remember when you put this on how cute you looked in it.
The tears kept falling as I remembered that day.
Drake- And last but not least........
He stood up and got on his knees and sang to me while holding my hand against his heart.
Trey Songz- holla if you need me
Holla if you need me, you always gone be my boo
Holla if you need me, you know I still got you
If you ever need me to be what you need girl I'm
free and forever you can holla at me.
I cried as his beautiful voice filled my soul with love and joy.
He stood up and then hugged me when the song was done.
Me- BABY!!!!!.............I never knew you could sing.
Drake- I saved it for a moment like this.
He said kissing me.
Me- Oh baby I got a present for you.
I said handing him the box.
(Drake)
I opened the small black box that had a D on it, inside was chain that said D&K which obviously stood for (Drake and Kemmie).
Kemmie- You can wear it forever baby.
I smiled.
Me- Thank you so much baby.
(Kemmie)
We climb onto the bed and I removed his shirt and ran my hand down his sexy 8 pack.
Me- Baby what am I gunner do with out you.
Drake- I dunno, but I'm not ready to find out.
He said kissing my lips and rubbing the inside of my thigh.
He picked me up and took me into the bathroom and turned the shower on we both got inside and kissed each other passionately as the warm water fell on our skin, I wrapped my legs around his waist as he sucked on my neck with great passion.
The water fell down his face making me want him even more, every time his lips touched a part of my skin it sent shock waves running through my system and all I could do was pray that this moment would never come to an end.
He eased himself inside of me and we made sweet passionate love for hours on end and then when our bodies were weak and we had no strength to go on we crawled out the shower and dried our skin and jumped into bed.
As I slipped into a deep sleep I saw Drakes beautiful eyes peering into mine...and it sounded like he whispered goodbye.
I woke up the next day with a smile on my face, I turned to wake up my baby but he was no longer there instead there was a note and a CD and a small box sitting neatly where his head would have been.
The letter:
Dear Boo,
I'm gunner miss you, everything about you. All those good times we had and those precious moments we shared together. Some people spend all there lives looking for love and I found it just in the nick of time. We had a short time together but it was all worth it, and I wouldn't change it for the world. I remember the first time I meet you I was speechless.....you were so beautiful and then we got to know each other more and I found out you wasn't only beautiful on the outside, but you were beautiful on the inside. I cried while I wrote this to for you, because just the thought of losing you alone is enough to kill me, because I love you sooo much and I'm gunner look after you whether I'm sitting on a cloud or part of the stars in the sky I'm always going to be with you. I died a happy man Kemmie and its all down to you, you made me see life in a whole new perspective. Keep your head up baby and don't let no body bring you down, when life gets hard and you feel like you wanna give up think of me. A while back before I came to the UK I asked god to find me the girl of my dreams, someone I could love and give my all too and he gave me what I asked for, he gave me a beautiful girl called Kemmie. Its going to take time, but your going to need to move on one day. One day your gunner have a beautiful family and a husband who loves you and cherishes you, what hurts me the most is that I wish It could have been me.
Love you forever
x Drake x
I ran downstairs with tears streaming down my face and I found him laying on the sofa.
Me- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....BABY SPEAK TO ME.
I said rocking him gently.
Me-DRAKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Everyone ran downstairs to see what all the commotion was about.
Neesee- No......................No.........................No.....................Drake, baby wake up........baby don't do this.....
As I lay on the floor everything seemed to be moving in slow-motion and there was no sound except the sound in my head of Drake singing......................
Holla if you need me, you always gone be my boo
Holla if you need me, you know I still got you
If you ever need me to be what you need girl I'm
free and forever you can holla at me. x