After my and Dakota's first date to the movies went so smoothly and amazing, I realized everything was going way too perfectly between us. The territory was so new--having a boyfriend who loved me that I had some pretty strong feelings for in return--it was all a mystery to me. Yet, everything seemed okay. Which was why I knew it wouldn't last.
It was also why I wasn't surprised when his dad walked in on us making out in his bedroom after lacrosse practice the Thursday after our Sunday night date.
Dakota shoved me away from him so hard that my elbow smacked off of the bedside table and instantly exploded in sharp pain. I didn't say anything, though, as Mr. Spicer stood there in the doorway fuming and glaring at me as though the action alone could kill me. I shrank away and looked down at my elbow to see it going red.
"Dad, what are you doing here?" Dakota said, jumping to his feet. I saw him step in front of me as if he could somehow shelter me from his father's unhappy gaze.
"You're grounded," was all Dakota's dad said.
"No, you can't do that!"
"I can and I will," he said, crossing his arms over his chest. The words and the action reminded me so much of Dakota that it was uncanny.
"It's not fair--"
"What's not fair is you bringing this boy over again and again thinking I'm stupid. I know what you're doing, Dakota."
"It's not that big of a deal!" Dakota argued. I could see his hands shaking and I wasn't sure if it was from anger or nerves.
"You deliberately disobeying an order is a big deal. So you're grounded until I say otherwise."
"Dad, stop. Nothing happened."
"And nothing will. Not in this house," Mr. Spicer snapped. I flinched at his words; if only he knew what already had happened in his house. He glanced around his son and fixed me with a cold stare. "You need to leave."
I swallowed as my heart pounded and I nodded, getting off of the bed. Dakota yelled out in protest, grabbing my arm to keep me from exiting the room, while his dad told him to be quiet. But the thing that had all of us falling into a brief and shocked silence was Dakota's mom casually walking passed the bedroom door and calling out, "Let his boyfriend stay, honey. You're always overreacting."
My eyes went wide as I glanced from person to person. Dakota was grinning triumphantly at his father who quickly turned around to follow after his wife. He looked furious as he went.
"What, are you crazy? He can't just disobey the rules with no consequences!" he yelled.
Mrs. Spicer sounded both bored and annoyed by her husband's words as she said, "He's always been gay, darling, get over it. If you didn't enforce ridiculous rules then he wouldn't be breaking them."
The sound of a door slamming shut cut off whatever response Dakota's dad was going to give. My boyfriend turned to me and I was looking at him with my jaw dropped open.
"Did that seriously just happen?"
Dakota smiled shyly. I could tell he was pleased, though. "My mom's the best."
"She sure as fuck is," I said, staring out into the empty hallway. I could hear muffled yelling from his parents' bedroom a few doors down. "Your dad is pissed, though."
"My mom can handle it. He's totally whipped."
I shook my head in disbelief. "This is insane."
"I told you my dad was always uptight about my friends because he was suspicious of them doing something with me. That's the first time my gayness has ever been confirmed for him, though. I'm not surprised he acted like a dick about it."
"I guess I can't blame him. I'm over here corrupting his precious angel," I said teasingly as I wrapped my arms around his waist.
"You act tough, but you're not," he retorted.
I grinned and gave him a quick kiss. Dakota reached out and I tossed him a questioning look until he grabbed my arm and turned it to look at the red mark where I'd hit my elbow.
"I'm sorry," he said, looking up at me through his lashes.
I shrugged and pulled him into a hug. "It's alright, it was an accident. I think I might actually live."
Dakota was going to respond but without any warning, his dad was suddenly back at the door, glaring at me behind his son's back. I jumped, completely startled, and tried to put more distance between Dakota and me.
"Brand's coming home this weekend," Mr. Spicer said gruffly. "Dinner here tomorrow night, Dakota." Without looking at me, he added, "Your mother wants you to bring your boyfriend."
With that, he pulled Dakota's door shut in another loud slam, leaving the two of us blinking like idiots at the wood. I rubbed my hands over my face feeling more distressed than I could ever remember being. "He fucking hates me."
"Probably."
I shot Dakota a look. "Wow, thanks."
"It's what I'm here for. Emotional support and shit."
"Thank god you're an expert," I said sarcastically, earning a beautiful smile that nearly made my knees give out.
**************
"I don't think I can do this," I said for the fourth time since Dakota had picked me up from my house. I stared out of his windshield and at his house we were parked in front of. "I really don't."
Dakota found my hand and squeezed it. "It can't be worse than what happened yesterday."
I pursed my lips for a moment. "I think it can. This was a horrible idea. Take me home."
Dakota rolled his eyes. "Quit acting like a bitch. It'll be fine; my mom already loves you. Brand will too."
"You don't know that," I protested. "Plus your dad wants me dead."
"My dad's in denial and an asshole sometimes, but he'll get over it eventually. Us being gay just makes him uncomfortable because he hasn't really been exposed to it before."
"You grew up in his house," I pointed out.
"Yeah, but he tried to keep me in the closet and ignored my sexuality for my whole life. I tried to do ballet when I was eight, you know?" he suddenly asked. I shook my head, not having heard this before. "Yeah, my mom signed me up without telling my dad because I'd been begging for months, dancing around the house like a fool. Anyway, I did a week's worth of classes and then he found out, stormed into the dance hall halfway through a lesson and dragged me out. He never mentioned it again and it's been ten years."
"Your dad is insane."
"My dad is the king of pretending things that aren't the norm have never happened." Dakota let out a sigh and squeezed my hand again. "But I don't want him to pretend that this--us--never happened. You're really important to me, Harley."
Maybe it was the tenderness in his voice, or the affectionate way he was looking at me, but either way something had me melting a little. So I stuffed down my worries and nodded at him as confidently as I could. "Okay. Let's do this, then."
"Thanks," Dakota said, leaning over to give me a short hug. "I know this is a lot for you especially since you aren't even out to your own parents. I just want you to know that I really do appreciate you."
I nodded. "I care about you. So I'm gonna support you even if I'd rather be home throwing up."
Dakota laughed and I just kissed his cheek before we finally stepped out of the car.
He loosely held onto my hand as we made our way up to the front door and he threw me a final reassuring smile before letting go of my hand and pushing the door open. I followed him inside and instantly the smell of a home cooked meal filled my nostrils. My stomach growled in retaliation.
Dakota and I had only finished lacrosse practice an hour before and I was absolutely starving like usual.
We wandered into the kitchen, Dakota with much more confidence in his steps than me, to see his mom pulling something out of the oven. Whatever it was, it looked and smelled delicious.
"Hey, mom. Where's Brand?" Dakota asked his mom.
"He should be here any minute. Do me a favour and grab some pot holders and take this to the dining room, sweetheart."
Dakota quickly did as she asked and as he was on his way out of the room, he motioned with his head for me to follow. "You okay?" he asked as soon as we were alone again.
I nodded, inspecting the table. It was already set with dinnerware enough for the five of us. I bit my lip, feeling my nerves beginning to wake up again.
Dakota squeezed my arm. "I'm gonna go see if my mom needs anything else. You can hide in here if you want."
I looked at him gratefully. "Thanks."
I watched him walk away and then glanced around the room. The late afternoon sunshine was coming in through the window and filling the dining room with yellow light. I took a deep breath and waited a few more minutes for Dakota to come back.
Except it wasn't him who came back first, it was his mom. She was carrying two carafes--one filled with ice water and the other with something that looked like peach lemonade. I rushed forward to help her situate them where she wanted on the table.
Standing back and admiring her handiwork, Mrs. Spicer turned and gave me a warm smile. I tried not to shy away from her, but it was hard because she regarded me with so much kindness that even my own mother barely showed me that whenever I was in this situation I felt awkward as hell.
"Thanks for your help, sweetheart," she said.
I nodded and gave a small smile, avoiding eye contact. "Thanks for inviting me for dinner, Mrs. Spicer."
"I'm glad to have you. I know you boys are nervous, but don't let my husband get to you. He has a lot to learn, that's for sure, but he loves his children." She gave me a wink. "Just between you and me...I've got him working on his issues."
She dropped her voice and moved closer to me. "It's a lot of work, something we aren't taking lightly, but it's still a work in progress. Travis is still too embarrassed to tell Dakota about the counseling he's doing, so let's just keep it on the down low for now."
I couldn't keep the surprise off of my face when everything she was saying sunk in. I nodded. "I won't say anything. I'm sure when he finds out, Dakota will really appreciate it."
Mrs. Spicer grinned and patted me on the shoulder. "You're good for him. He's been a lot happier recently and I think a lot of that has to do with you."
I felt the tips of my ears burn and I looked at the table again. "I'm not really doing anything..."
"You do more than you realize." I thought she was going to say something else, but Dakota appeared in the doorway again. She smiled and told him, "I'm going to go find your father; we'll be back."
Dakota nodded as his mother slipped by him. He walked over to me and raised his brows. I noticed his cheeks looked flushed for some reason. "What was that about?"
I shrugged. "She was just making small talk. Your mom is literally the nicest mom ever."
"I know. I don't know what I'd do without her."
When he moved forward and pulled me in for a kiss, I froze against his lips. I never got the chance to say anything about the way he tasted because a second later there was a new deep and joyful voice calling out and announcing his arrival.
Dakota jumped back, a huge grin on his face as he quickly left the room in search of his older brother. I, on the other hand, was rooted to the spot. My mind was whirling because it had been so long since I'd tasted alcohol on Dakota's kiss that I'd actually thought we were done with that.
I shakily ran a hand through my hair as I tried to wipe away the worrying thoughts about his obvious dependency.
A few moments later Dakota came back and grabbed onto my arm, dragging me out into the hall to meet the slightly older version of himself. He was practically bouncing off of the walls with excitement and I realized that I'd never actually seen him so genuinely elated.
"Brand, this is Harley!" Dakota said, beaming at the both of us. "You guys are going to get along so well."
"I'll be the judge of that," his brother said, sending a playful wink and sticking his hand out for me to shake. I noticed that he had the same dark hair and sea-green eyes as Dakota. "Nice to meet you. This kid's been babbling about you to me for years. You're like his Prince Charming."
I blushed even though I tried extremely hard not to, and Dakota quickly cut Brand off by saying, "Okay, that's enough for now. How's school been?"
Brand laughed and caught my eye, sending me a pointed look before he and Dakota jumped into a discussion about his life at college.
Twenty minutes later we were all seated around the table--Dakota's dad finally having surfaced from wherever he'd been hiding. I tried not to judge him too harshly for his standoffish behaviour especially since I now knew he was actively attending counseling to help his mindset. At the same time, it was incredibly unnerving every time he fixed a cold stare on me.
"So, Harley," Brand said, giving me a smile. "Did Dakota ever tell you how he tried out hockey before he settled on lacrosse?"
Surprised at this information I looked between Dakota who was now groaning for some reason, and his older brother. "No, I had no idea."
"Well," he said, holding back laughter. "He tried...that's for sure."
"Brand, really?"
"Dakota, really?" his brother mocked. He looked back at me, his eyes shining with amusement. "Let me just say that this kid has no clue how to stand on ice. It was fucking hilarious watching him out there."
I chuckled behind my hand as I finished my latest bite. Then I gave Dakota an affectionate smile. Without thinking I said, "What, you mean his ballet skills didn't come in handy?"
For a second, I thought I had completely fucked up as Mr. Spicer's knuckles went white as they wrapped tightly around his fork. But then Mrs. Spicer and Brand both started laughing as Dakota hid his face in his hands.
"I totally forgot about that!" Brand said between cackles. "He's got shit for balance, even that week on the balance beam couldn't have saved him on the ice."
Brand leaned over the table to hi-five me and I grinned as our hands made that brief contact. I was shocked to admit that the evening was going much better than I'd originally anticipated.
"Mom," Dakota groaned.
Mrs. Spicer choked down her giggles. "Sweetheart, your brother's right. You tried but you never did have much for coordination out there."
"Well I'm glad it didn't work out," I told Dakota, nudging him in the elbow when Brand and his mom began talking amongst themselves. "We'd probably not be here now if it had."
Dakota gave me a satisfied smile. When the sunshine caught his eyes, I felt something flutter in my chest. "I guess you're right."
As he turned away to take another bite of his food, I glanced at the other end of the table and caught Mr. Spicer's eye. I bit my lip but was pleasantly surprised when he didn't give me another nasty look. He simply pursed his lips, blinked at me a few times as if he were trying to figure me out, and then looked back down at his plate.
On the inside I was dying from nerves, but I was also partly glad that at least in that moment my boyfriend's dad seemed the tiniest bit less interested in murdering me. I figured I would take what I could get.