I woke up the next morning looking around. I had a pounding headache and realized I wasn't at home.
I seen some pills on this nightstand with some water. The note read 'This should help the headache.' Last night began rushing back to me. "No no no no." I said getting up.
I fell instantly as I felt a sharp pain in my vagina. I looked at the bed to see Damarion still sleep.
I gotta stick this shit out.
I forced myself up and took the pain killers. I found my clothes and phone.
I can't call Brandy. Fuck. I limped out the room and took my time going down the steps. "Raquel?" I heard somebody say.
I turned around to see his sister.
"Fuck." I said under my breath. "Let me guess you slept with my brother."
"I was drunk." I said. She sighed.
"Come on so I can take you home." I was surprised his sister offered to help considering she's never liked me or Brandy.
She helped me down the steps and out to her car. "He took yo virginity?" She asked.
I buckled up and looked at her. "Yeah."
She shook her head. "Did y'all at least use protection?" "Um I don't remember. I was drunk so the night was blurry." I told her.
"Look Raquel as you know I've never been a fan of you and Brandy but since I dislike Brandy way more than I dislike you, y'all secret is safe with me." I nodded.
"Thank you." "No problem. Where do you stay?" I had to think quick considering I lived in the most fucked you part of orange mound and she lived in Cordova. "Helloooo?" She said.
"I live in Orange Mound." I said low.
"Where at?" I gave her the address to my grandmother's house which wasn't as bad looking as ours.
She turned the music up and I started laughing as she twerked to some Cardi B song. "What's funny?" She said laughing. "Never would've imagined you listened to music like this."
"Girl I love me some twerking music." She said.
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We pulled up to my grandma house. I grabbed all my stuff.
"You good?" She asked. "Yeah. You know you not the bitch I thought you were." "And you're not the loser I thought you was." She said. I shook my head and got out the car.
I need to soak my body in warm water cause everything waist down hurts.
I was at the door when she called my name.
"Wassup?" "Take some pregnancy tests if you don't come on." I nodded.
"Yeah. Thanks." I used my key and walked in my Nana's house. "Grammy?" I called. "In here." She said. I walked into the kitchen.
"It smells so good." I told her.
"I made breakfast." I nodded. "Let me shower and I'll be ready." I tried to hide the limp and walked to my room.
I stay with my momma but I'm mainly here during school breaks.
I grabbed some pajamas and walked to the restroom. I ran a nice lil bubble bath and turned on Tamar's radio station.
As soon as my body hit the water I was so relaxed.
I closed my eyes and last night popped in my mind. What am I suppose to tell Brandy? School is tomorrow I can't face Damarion.
I've fucked up big time.
_________________________
It was late at night and I was still somewhat sore but I could control my limping a lil more.
My Nana dropped me off at home.
"Bye baby girl. I love you." "I love you too Nana." I opened the door to see my lil sister on the couch with my momma.
"Tootie!!" She screamed running to hug me.
"Hey bookie." I kissed all over her face. My momma stared at me and walked up on me. "Get pregnant here." She said walking off.
I rolled my eyes. I was so tired.
"You ready for school?" I asked my lil sister. "Yep." "Okay let's go to bed." We stay in a 2 bed room apartment but it's not really an issue since we're the only kids.
I went into my room to see Brandy.
"You scared me." I said. She looked at me. "So I need the details." She said.
"For?" I asked her.
"You and Shawn?" She said in a duh tone. "Oh it was okay." I said lying.
"Well it was ya first time so it's always okay."
Only if she knew it's was better than okay it was amazing. "Yeah."
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*One Month Later*
I was so tired of this school shit already.
"Brandy?" I called after her. "Ma'am?" "What we doing after school?" She humped her shoulders. "Your place?"
"Nah can we go to yours?" "Um yeah wassup?" "Nothing my mama just been on my ass lately." "Why?" "Girl I don't even know. After school I gotta get Robyn." She nodded as we went our separate ways.
I walked past the janitor's closet when I was snatched in.
"Let me go hoe I got pepper spray." I said swinging. "Chill Rocky." I heard Damarion's voice.
"It's just you."
"Yeah. You good?" I nodded. "Why you been dodging me?" I asked him.
"About that night it was a mistake."
"I know but you did take my virginity so you could at least pretend to give a fuck about me." I said. He pulled me close.
"Look Raquel that night I took apart of you and it was wonderful. Shit the best I've had if I'm being honest but I can't be seen with you or I can't let people know we talked on that level so could you do me a favor and not tell no one." I looked at this clown.
"I'm telling Brandy I can't keep lying to her Damarion."
"That's the last person I want you to tell."
"Look here Damarion you already blowing it by even telling me to hide what we did but I will not lie to my best friend."
He stared at me right before his lips crashed onto mines.
He pulled me close and I tugged at his shirt.
I snatched away and ran to the mop bucket and threw up my guts.
"You good?" He asked holding my hair back.
I pucked up everything. I sat up. "Yeah I need to go wash my mouth out." I said.
"Raquel?" He said as I walked to the door.
"Hm?" "Please don't tell her." I sighed and gave him a thumbs up before running to the girl's restroom.
I went to the sink to wash my mouth out.
I couldn't stay at school I felt so bad. I ran to my locker to get my gym bag so I could change since I had throw up on my clothes.
I hurried up and changed.
I had to walk home but first I needed to make a stop.
I ran to the nearest Walgreens and went down the isle I dreaded my whole life. I looked around for the perfect one.
"Try First Response." This lady said beside me. "Thanks." "How old are you?"
"17." I said.
"Your young." "Yeah I know if I'm pregnant I'm throwing my life away I've heard it a hundred times." I said rolling my eyes.
"Baby no I was not about to tell you that. Hey I'm Ms. Banks, CEO of one of the biggest law firms in America, pregnant at 15 with a daughter, pregnant at 16 with a son, married at 22, CEO at 26, and successful at 33." She said.
I laughed. "Nice to meet you. I'm Raquel Fenty." She smiled.
"Nice to meet you Raquel. Here's my number if you need anything please call me also I would love to know the results."
I grabbed her card and she hugged me.
"Thank you." "No problem beautiful." She grabbed 3 tests for me. "They can be kind of cruel to younger people."
We walked to the front and I handed her the money. "I got it." She said.
She paid for the test and walked me outside.
"Thank you so much again." I said hugging her. She looked at me and smiled. "No problem baby girl." I began to walk off.
"Where you headed?" She asked.
"My best friend's house." "Where she stay?"
"Not too far from here."
"Come on." I got in her truck and gave her the directions. I didn't get her the full address cause I didn't know her like that.
She pulled up about 2 houses down.
"Thank you." "No problem. Don't forget to call me." I pulled my phone out and called her so she could have my number.
"What you want it saved under?" She asked me. "What ever it doesn't matter." She nodded. "How about God Daughter?" I smiled. "Sure." I saved her number and walked the rest of the way to Brandy's house.
I used my key and went straight in.
Nobodies never home around this time. I went to her room and laid out on the bed. I needed a nap.
I hid the tests at the bottom of my backpack and just let sleep take over my body.
_________________________
"Raquel?" I heard somebody say while shaking me.
"Leave me alone." I said. "Rocky get up." I sighed and got up. "What?" I noticed it was Brandy's dad.
"I'm sorry I'm just really tired."
"I understand. Would you like to come down for dinner?" I nodded. "How long was I sleep?" He laughed.
"It's just 5 in the afternoon."
I forgot her family eats early as fuck. I got up and went to the restroom. I did my hygiene and put all my stuff back up on my side of the restroom.
I looked in the mirror.
This last month has been so rough for me but I gotta push through. I went downstairs to see Robyn eating.
"Hey bookie." I said hugging her. She smiled big. "Hey tootie I had fun at school today."
"You did?" "What you learn?" "My letters and numbers." My sister is 5 and she's so smart. "Later I want you to show me okay?" She nodded and started back eating.
They cooked chicken Alfredo Pasta.
One of my favorites. I fixed me a huge bowl of it and as soon as the smell hit my nose I became nauseous.
I ignored it and sat at the table anyways.
I picked the chicken out cause it made me want to throw up. I slowly ate my pasta and just listened to their conversations.
"Raquel dear are you okay?" Her mom asked. "Yes ma'am. Just not really hungry." She nodded. "Okay we have rolls and fruit if you want any of that."
"Thanks." I grabbed some fruit and it settled my stomach.
"Best friend you look sick." Brandy said.
"Yeah but I can push through since tomorrow's Friday." She nodded. "You staying the night?" She asked.
"Nah." "Okay."
______________________
We was in the room talking. "Brandy?" "Hm?" "I might be pregnant and I need to take these tests." I dug in my backpack pulling them out.
"Wait by who?" She said.
I sighed thinking did I really want to tell her. "Um I don't know." I just said.
"What you mean?"
"Well last month at the party I got drunk and I can't remember who took my virginity." I said lying.
"Oh best friend." She said hugging me.
I felt so bad for not telling her. "Well do you remember sleeping with Shawn?"
"Um I don't know." "So that's why you told me it was just okay cause you don't know." I nodded. "Okay let's take em."
We went into the restroom.
"Tootie where you going?" My sister asked. "Just to the bathroom okay?" She nodded.
I closed the door and peed on each stick.
"How long we gotta wait?" She asked me. "They said about 10 minutes but if you're pregnant it should pop up within 2." I told her while wiping myself.
She stood there staring at me as I passed her the tests.
"I don't wanna see the results." I told her. We wrapped em in tissue but soon after we heard it beep. "Um best friend?" She said looking up at me.
"Congratulations you're going to be a mommy." She said slowly.
"Nooooo." I said grabbing the tests.
"I can't be pregnant Brandy. My mama is going to kick me out. Where will I go? How can I afford a baby?" I broke down and she held me. "It's okay baby." She said.
I didn't know what to do.
"I can't go home." I said. I wanted to cry, scream, and everything else.
I'm pregnant by my best friend's boyfriend.
_______________________
"Do you mind sleeping in the guest room? Damarion's coming over." Brandy said.
I decided to stay over cause I couldn't face my mama knowing I disappointed her. "Yeah sure." I got up and grabbed Robyn.
I went to a guest room and laid down turning the t.v on.
"How would you feel about being an auntie?" I asked her. "Um sure." She said smiling. "Would you want a niece or nephew?"
"I want a nephew." "Why?"
"Because I wanna be yo favorite girl forever." She said. I laughed. "You'll always be my favorite girl." I said kissing her cheek.
She smiled. "I love you Tootie."
"I love you too bookie." I pulled her close and we watched Disney Channel until we both fell asleep.
__________________
I woke up in the middle of the night to go throw up.
I ran to the restroom and threw up again. "Fuck." I said. I got up and brushed my teeth and washed my face.
I flushed the toilet and sprayed the bathroom down.
I walked out when I ran into somebody.
"My bad." I said getting up. "Raquel?" He said. "Damarion." I tried to walk pass when he pulled me back by my arm.
"Thank you." He said. "For?"
"Not telling her." "Yeah I guess." I wanted to tell him I was pregnant but I was having second thoughts.
"Um is Brandy sleep?" I asked him.
"Yeah I was just going to get some to drink." I nodded. "I have to tell you something." I said. He looked confused.
"Um." I said looking at the ground.
"Nevermind goodnight." I walked back to the room and climbed in bed.
I'm just going to get an abortion. I can't do this. I won't do this.