Gone are the cheery Welcome back assembly's with Dumbledore. The castle was much darker, literally, as well as figuratively, this year.
No one dared to make jokes anymore, not with the Carrows creeping around. Students didn't dare to miss-behave in lessons anymore, as they didn't want to suffer the consequences.
Writing lines were a thing of the past. Students were chained up in the dungeons, or had the Cruciatus Curse used on them, if they broke the rules.
There was only a handful of older students that dared to rebel, pretty much everyone who had been in the DA.
This was why me and Ginny fell out. I refused to take part in their rebellious activities, so she called me a coward.
I would never betray them, and reveal how they sent secret messages to each other, via Hermione's coins. But I couldn't join in with them, as the Carrows were always watching me, and I couldn't risk getting caught.
I felt sorry for the first years, who had never been to Hogwarts before, as they didn't know that the school wasn't normally like this.
We no longer had Defense Against the Dark Arts, in those lessons we learned dark magic, rather than defensive magic. This included the Unforgiveable Curses, which we had to use on people in detention.
Those are the worst lesson, but Alecto's Muggle Studies classes, come a close second.
She rambles on about how Muggles are scum, and how they chased us in to hiding, by being aggressive.
Those that suffer the most in these classes, are the half-bloods, who have one muggle parent. The Muggle-Borns would hate those classes as well, but they weren't allowed to attend Hogwarts this year.
Showing just how far the school has fallen.
The only ones who like the new school curriculum, are the Slytherins. I'd say a good 90% of them, at least, love learning how to torture people.
The Malfoy name has sunk so low, that even Draco is having a hard time at school. His lackies, Crabbe and Goyle, no longer follow him around like servants. And they are even starting to look down on him, because of his and his fathers failings.
But the weirdest change this year, is my lack of potions lessons. I expected to continue my private classes with Slughorn, or even Snape.
However, according to the Carrows, Voldemort doesn't want any students, including me, to be spending one-to-one time, with non Death Eater teachers. And apparently Headmaster Snape is too busy to teach me.
I don't know what Snape is busy doing, because we hardly ever see him. I expect he is doing some sort of job for Voldemort, but I can't be sure.
All I know is, that he leaves us in the hands of the Carrows. The other teachers do their best to protect us from them. But there is only so much they can do.
They have to be careful what they say and do, to make sure that they don't get arrested, for not supporting the Carrows regime.
With everything going on at Hogwarts, I wanted to leave and never come back. Which is why I was looking forward to the Christmas holidays.
But then I remembered I would have to return to the Malfoy Manor, and then I wasn't so excited about leaving.
I wasn't sure which place was worse.
Hogwarts is run by Death Eaters, who punish you for every little thing.
But the Malfoy Manor has even more Death Eaters, and houses Voldemort on occassion.
In both places, I don't feel safe.
I'm worried that if I say the wrong thing, I will be killed, but that is the same, for both places.
Leaving Hogwarts was nice, but returning to the Manor was not. And it wasn't just the Death Eaters that made me uncomfortable.
My friend Luna was taken from the train on the way home, and when I arrived at the Manor, I found her in the basement.
Living in a house, while your best friend rots below your feet, is a whole new kind of horrible.
Just when I think life at the Malfoy Manor can't get any worse, Voldemort finds a new way to make things worse.
As I was of age this year, my wand was taken from me when I arrived, so that I couldn't use magic. This was probably done to stop me helping Luna.
But this didn't stop me. I asked my house elf Saffy to bring food to Luna, to keep her spirits up, as house elves can apparate into the dungeons.
This made me feel a little bit better about myself, as at least I was doing something for the cause.