____________
MESSAGES.
TWO YEARS LATER.
YURI:
JISUNG
JISUNG
JISUNG
JISUNG
HEY IT'S BEEN TEN SECONDS
Y ARENT U REPLYING
HANNIE:
WHAT
IM HERE
WHAT??????
YURI:
where are you??
why are you so late??
did something happen??
HANNIE:
the train just got delayed by a few minutes
I'll be there before you know it!
don't worry babe :(
YURI:
what if it happens to you?
what will i do?
i cant live like that
HANNIE:
it won't happen and it never will
i promise
just wait and stay calm, alright?
REALITY,
"Please, please be safe." I sigh out, nervously tapping my foot on the snowy ground. It's been half an hour since Jisung last texted me and rather than thinking about how long we were separated, I thought about his safety more.
It was snowing... and I was in a train station.
This place that I've avoided so much only reminds me of those memories. And no amount of healing could ever erase the substance that this place carried, but I guess coping with it has gotten better than before.
I feared that maybe, just maybe, when I feel that same frenzy of excitement at the pit of my stomach that I felt when I was waiting for my mother again, it would all just end up in the same way she did.
"Where are you?" I subconsciously whimper, the turbulence in my chest growing rowdier as each second passes.
"You're safe, you're safe right? you're safe." I lowly chant to myself like a mantra. Though the more times I repeat that phrase, the more vivid that sick pang in my heart gets. It was like my vision was switching back and forth from the current now, and then to the day my life took a turn for worse; because damnit this situation looks awfully familiar.
As soon as I heard the loud blare of a train approaching, my eyes open immediately. I desperately try to look over the crowd gathering over the entrance, scanning for a familiar face.
I suddenly feel a hand grasp onto my arm and it startles me. I turn around, ready to smack whoever was there but I relaxed immediately once I saw who it is.
"Jesus christ Binnie don't scare me like that. I was about to kick you where the sun doesn't shi-"
"My bad, I didn't think it through." he quickly cuts me off with a cheeky grin and I groaned , crossing my arms. Somehow that huge load of anxiety gets lifted off of my chest. Changbin got out of the train safely which is an indicator that all was good but still, there wasn't any sign of Jisung anywhere.
Amid my search, I quickly huff. "I really missed you by the way, you and your stupidly fine ass."
"Aha! It has only gotten finer of course–"
"So where's Jisung?" he huffs.
"He left me once we stepped out of the train. I guess he went to look for you but you were standing pretty near the station so I was wondering why he didn't go to you immediately." I purse my lips, that load of anxiety resurfacing.
"Didn't you see him go out?" he asks, tilting his head and I shake my head.
"B-But he did get out of the train right?"
"Yes! don't worry. I saw him go somewhere else but he probably just went to the restroom. I suggest that you don't worry too much." I nod silently, hugging myself for warmth as I look around, desperately scanning for a lost squirrel anyway.
"I'll be going now! See you on our next dinner sweetcheeks." Changbin smiles, but then the corners of his lips rise even more once his eyes were trained onto something behind me.
Before I get to ask, he was already scurrying away in a hurry. Puzzled, I was about to turn around until a pair of arms snake around my waist. I was met with the familiar and addictive scent that lingers on the sweaters that I stole from his closet. Pressed against my back is a broader chest, they've gotten a bit bulkier since the last time I saw them two years ago.
I turn around in desperation, finally being able to see the face I've been yearning to see in person.
He wasn't in the pictures anymore, he wasn't in my wallpaper anymore, he wasn't on my laptop screen anymore — he was standing here, right here in front of me,
"Has noona missed me?" My arms magnetically loop around his waist, faceplanting into his chest, almost toppling him over in the process and this familiar warmth I've been deprived of; it was something that only he could offer in person.
For two whole years, I have been kept away from this warmth and it honestly feels surreal, now that I'm feeling it again for the first time in literally years. And now that it's here, I honestly don't think I could ever survive another day without it.
After a few moments, I feel his lips press against my forehead. I close my eyes, smiling to myself as I hug him closer.
Then I get mad.
"Where the hell were you?! Why did it take you so long to get here? Are you trying to kill me?!?!?"
"I just had to go to the bathroom for a bit, nothing bad happened to me." he chuckled, assuring me as he rubs my back while also confirming the speculations Changbin had awhile ago.
"And I'm afraid that's enough hugging noona or else you're going to suffocate me." he giggles, as that type of endearment slips out of his mouth naturally. A name that I used to hate being referred to but now that I hear his voice, it was something I could put on repeat on end and I would never get tired of it.
"But I missed you~! I waited long and hard for this moment." I whined like a child, note the age difference, and he laughs yet again, being the one to peel my face off his chest. He holds my face in his hands, squishing my cheeks which consequently pucker my lips and I pout at him.
"I missed you too." he sighs, smiling contentedly. He releases my cheeks and pulls my hood over my head.
As he did this, I realize how much he has changed in the span of two years. His features are broader, his form had some brawn to it, and he was definitely not the same squirrel I used to know two years ago.
Nevertheless, he's still a squirrel.
Once he puts the hood over my head, he pulls edges of the fabric in and therefore my head along with it, leaning in and pressing his lips against mine softly.
This, this I missed the most.
I could taste the bittersweet hint of his lip balm as his lips molded against mine. The same gentleness that was the reason why I fell so hard in the first place gets materialized for the first time in a while, and it now harbors a pent up hunger that's got him deepening the kiss even if we were exposed in the gaze of the public.
He pulls away, much to my disappointment, and he steals my breath once again.
"I love you." he whispers out for the first time today: the same I love you in the innumerable phone calls and thousands of texts that we shared, the same I love you that usually emerged automatically after the occasional breaking point, and the same I love you from that one winter night. All shared the same thought and feeling; but this one just seems to hit a lot more than I expected it to.
"I love noona so much~" he teasingly croons, pinching my cheeks and I whine at him, attempting to peel his cold hands off my face.
"Way to ruin the moment hunty." I pouted at him and he smiles goofily, sticking out his tongue.
"I can never stay serious for a long time."
"But you did stay with me even after two years of endless bullying so I think that's far as your seriousness can go."
"But it'll be no fun if you say it like that~"
"You're no fun-"
"Aigooo noona should just say it back now should she???" Jisung drags out, pinching my cheeks harder this time and I whine at him again, slapping his hand away from my face.
"What if I don't want to?"
"Do you really not want to?" he pouts and I hum deviously, shrugging my shoulders mockingly.
"I don't know, should I?" I taunt and he startles me again by giving me a short peck on the lips.
My face heats up against my prideful will and I blinked, trying to process things. Really Yuri? Ever the submissive one in the relationship.
"Will you say it now?" he grins widely and I sigh, smacking him on the head with my hand and he whines, overly exaggerated.
"I love you too . . . idiot."
"I prefer hunty more." he complains, but his smile says otherwise.
He suddenly slings his arms over my shoulders and drags me somewhere else, the direction he's leading me to looking really familiar.
Into unfamiliar fields, I am yet again bombarded by the foreign feeling of love. I have so much left to discover of this feeling that's been harboring my heart for the past two years, so much more to the neverland that just never seems to end, so many more adventures to go on with this raven-haired boy, who is just as lost as I am.
Maybe it's finally learning to trust the uncertainty, that I can finally breathe and confidently hold your hand, as you whisk me away to the unknown that we've created solely for ourselves.
"Let's get you some frozen yogurt yeah?"
A PEEK INTO THEIR JOURNEY.
fin.
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neverland is done : (