Morty waits at the closed bathroom door in his pajamas, waking up. After the sound of the toilet flushing, Rick trudges out, carrying a helmet.
"Oh," Rick says, yawning and seeing Morty waiting, "Here. Try this this time," handing him the helmet and walking away.
Morty rubs his eyes and looks at it, then says, "Oh, thanks." He puts the helmet on and goes to Rayna's closet.
He unlocks the door and Rayna rushes out, tackling him to pick him up as he expected but she lifts him out of the way as she races off saying, "No time for noogies! Forgot to pee before bed!"
Morty takes off the helmet and sighs.
"Summmmer... Guess what..." Beth says in a 'I have a surprise' voice, trying to get Summer off her phone. "I gave Jerry and that woman all my chores..." and Summer perks up. Beth continues, "So after your extra-credit project today, we can have a girls day out."
"Really?!" Summer puts her phone away without even ending the text conversation and races to grab her purse, then hugs her mom.
Beth adds, "(Some of which will include grocery shopping, because they don't have a car.)"
Summer stops hugging and her smile fades a little, "That's..." but it returns some, "That's ok. That means you can get me the ice cream I like."
"You mean you can, with your money," Beth corrects her. "Unless you want me to baby you like Jerry?" she says intentionally to sway her.
"Spfff," Summer scoffs, "...No..." trying to lie. She pouts for a second, but her ego finds the benefit in the situation and brags, "Did you know I was making more with Rick than Dad does at his new job?"
Beth sighs, "And so does Donald Trump's wife, because she allows the most anal. Do you really want a million dollars to figuratively do anal for Rick?"
"Ew mom!"
"I'm just tellin' it as it is sweetie. It's a sick world, I'm not going to coddle you..."
So Beth and Summer start to leave the house with Summer telling Morty they'll be back later.
Morty squeaks with all his embarrassment, "D—D—D—Don't forget to get more lotion—We're out of lotion I mean..."
Summer teases, "We're going to see a movie too, hope you can last..."
Beth nudges Summer to not be grossed out, "Sweetie, shaming men for an erection is like shaming women for a period. Besides, no one likes having them or getting their hands messy."
"Eww. Mom," both Summer and Morty say. Summer adds, "What's with you today."
"Fine, see if either of you get laid with that attitude towards healthy bodily functions," as Beth and Summer leave.
Standing next to Morty, Rayna tosses her dust-brush as hard as she dropkicks her friendly persona. Turning to Rick and trying to keep a neutral tone, she says, "Ok so... shoving that backpack on me is normally the first thing you do. Is it broken or what?"
Rick realizes he was too focused on the Citadel bullshit to have come up with a prepared lie, "It's not broken..." walking away to avoid her. "It's just not going to work."
Morty follows her following Rick to the garage as Rayna asks, "What did it even do?"
"None of your business, spy," then he turns around to pretend to grab something behind Morty, saying under his breath, "(Tell her anything and your computer will never have porn again.)" Morty's breath stops short, then Rick says, "Morty, help me with this will you? Let's see Rayna beat my Tekken score," taunting her hard.
But Rayna caught a glimpse of Morty's dread before Rick's distraction. She takes a moment to think very carefully about her next plan, ".......Well then... what's your new plan to get me out of here?"
"That's what we're working on. We need privacy. ~UURP~ Bye," Rick says without turning from his new project.
She crosses her arms slowly and speaks with a bitter confidence, "No... it's not... You're keeping something from me and you're manipulating Morty to do the same," looking at Morty, conveying motherly protection, to guilt him against Rick.
Rick's fist clench around a tool, then he decides something, to which his hand flings open to let the tool fall and he starts looking around for something, fed up. "Morty, have you seen a one-button remote somewhere?"
Morty debates his options but gripes, wanting to tell her, "Rick..."
"Morty..." Rick threatens.
"Rick, I'll tell mom. She'll get me porn. On VHS maybe, but still."
"Yeah, your dad's old porn, is that what you want?"
"No, but..." Morty says, looking between Rick and Rayna.
Rayna pats Morty and says, "I'll totally get you porn hun. Even from a Japanese store," winking to imply the worst perversion.
Rick moves to stand between her and Morty to continue looking while trying to push her away.
Morty looks around him to her to say, "We used it to go to your house in other dimensions—"
Rick yells, "God damn it! Do I need one for you too?!" then looks for something else, "Where's my chloroform?"
Now she becomes concerned and says, "You know where my house is?—Why wouldn't you tell me that? What do you want me to stay?"
Rick slams a cabinet shut and stops to glare at her.
Morty continues, "Rick was going to fix your memory using memories from other versions of you, but all versions were murdered."
"All?" she asks. "How is that possible?" glaring into Rick to imply he's stupid. "There's infinite, that means even if one molecule is different—"
Rick barks back, "You know how long it could take to find you in infinity?! It could take a year! It could take infinity!"
"I know how long infinity is," she says. "It's the same amount of time that you've been a dick."
"And you're such an infinite bitch that the entirety of infinity kept killing you off!" and Rick starts storming out. "You see what you did Morty!?" throwing up his arms.
She and Morty follow again as she says, "Nah, see, there's still something else. If it was just that, you'd have no reason not to tell me to keep me here or safe or to make me thankful."
"Then maybe I don't want you here!"
"Maybe? Ok. Then tell me, and I'll leave," knowing he won't.
He just glares at her, kinda wishing he was the type to slap a bitch—just this once—yet knowing slapping her would probably turn her on, therefore wishing he could again.
Rayna says, "Yeah, so why won't you tell me, huh? Why do you want me to stay? What, do you fucking care about me, you sack of shit?!"
He bursts. "FINE! YOU WANA KNOW?! It's because you weren't murdered! You killed yourself! Every version of you in infinity decided you're better off dead. And no one was there to find your body except equally depraved horny thugs. Are you happy now? Are you glad you know? I mean I can only imagine why you did it considering you manipulate everyone around you, you—"
It had taken a moment for Rick to finally realize she had only baited him, yet again, that her exaggerated anger—pretending she wanted to leave—was just part of her trap, until now. Because now, it was as if the blood from her heart had drained, as if her lungs caved in and her tears fell inward.
"God damn it..." Rick says. He tries to make himself leave but keeps deciding against it.
"(It's ok...)" she barely murmurs. "I'll give you space... I need time alone to think..." and she walks out, looking frail.
Morty wanted to follow her, but he was speechless—scared whether he really did the right thing. He and Rick both stay that way as they head back to the garage, but Rick waves him away, needing his space. So Morty goes to the den to hang out with Jerry, albeit feeling entirely distant from his father or the golf show due to what just happened.
As Rick puts the last of a dozen hardware pieces together, he takes his finished thing to the den to find Morty alone and says, "Ok I'm going to use this to get the next chip. Can you... Go check on her or something. Let her manipulate your balls. That'd cheer her up." Rick waits for him to start moving before leaving via portal.
Morty starts checking rooms and Rayna's closet but can't find her. When he sees the bathroom door cracked open, he carefully knocks, "Rayna?" No answer, so he checks—sees her naked in the tub— "OH I'M SORRY! I—" and as he yanks the door shut, sees blood.
Swinging the door open, he sees blood running down the side of the tub from her wrist as she drops a razor. "Oh my god! Rayna! OH NO OH NO NO NO!" He starts freaking the fuck out—grabs her arm—touches blood—drops arm—hyperventilating—looks around—grabs towel—wraps wrist and holds on tight.
"Morty..." she tries to move her arm away but depression and anemia had shut her down. "Stop... Why are...?"
"Be quiet! What are you doing!? Wh—Wh—Wh—"
"I'm... I'm just going to remember this—the—the something bad and do it anyways... It's bad... I'm...I gona stop that, don't want to feel that..."
"That's—No, that's not ok!"
"Why? Why do you... get a say? You shouldn't care, about me, I—(ugh)—I don't actually care about you kid—(god so dizzy)—It was fun messing with Rick."
Morty's heart breaks a little, then more than a little, but it was a strong heart, he knew what was right, "Well I—I—I don't care, I'm not going to let you die. I'd save Rick's ass and he doesn't even care about me—or—I—I don't know—I guess he does—but he's an asshole, so at least you pretend to like me."
"Morty..." She almost adds 'you really are an idiot' but in her haze she could hear him trembling and sniffling, so her tiny heart grew a very small amount.
"Come on," he starts trying to pull her up, clenching her toweled wrist. "We gotta get help, come on!"
Sitting up, she holds onto him for balance, drunkenly hugging him from lack of blood, "You know how—um—dead bodies shit themselves?"
"Uh—Yeah, wh—"
Large bubbles burst from her underwater ass.
"Eww! Oh god. Oh—Come on, let's go to the hospital. We gotta get you to the hospital."
* * *
A Morty falls from a portal in the ceiling and lands sprawled out on the floor.
"MORTY!?" a coatless Rick runs over to do what seemed like hugging him until he heaves Morty onto his feet.
"Rick?! Is that you? I—I—I thought—"
"We're in deep shit Morty, they took my portal gun—my coat—and memories—I—I—I don't even remember which Rick I am—What's your number?—Do you remember anything? Morty!" shaking him.
"I—I—I—He said I'm Morty C-137, and I haven't forgotten anything, I don't think."
"Ok good, I must be Rick C-137 then." He whips around to all directions of the room, "YOU HEAR THAT MOTHER FUCKERS!? YOU FUCKED UP! YOU THOUGHT IT WAS USELESS TO ERASE MORTY'S THREE BRAIN CELLS, BUT I'LL KILL YOU WITH THEM!! Actually Morty ~UURP~ we're pretty fucked. I think they disabled everything I have—my deflection shield—internal weapons systems—even my GroinSystem6000."
"What about mine—my shields? Did you—Did you even put any in me?"
"Don't be stupid Morty. And what else better to motivate you to learn how to make your own groin protector than 6000 kicks to the groin."
Morty gets pissed, "OH is that why it's called that!? Because you've been kicked in the groin 6000 times for being an asshole?!"
A door opens. Bodyguard Rick 1-03 and President Morty enter. On the outside of the door was the label Therapy Room.
Rick yells at them, "You're after my chips aren't you, I knew this was a trap. You're trying to kill all the Ricks aren't you!"
President Morty says, "Hello to you too. Welcome, C-137s, to therapy. My therapy. You get to participate in a process I developed to heal and improve myself, to better serve the people."
"Suck my dick!" and Rick goes to punch 1-03 but gets mysteriously electrocuted by merely touching him.
President Morty had paid little attention to this Rick and Morty and had seated himself in a padded chair, making himself comfortable.
He watches Rick get to his feet as Morty says, "W—W—What do you want?"
President Morty stares at these two, conjuring more than just a hardened shell, now making a conscious effort to squeeze every last drop of humanity out of himself. He keeps his eyes on these two to make—not orders—but suggestions to his bodyguard, "1-03, if you'd like, you can start however you wish. It's been a busy day, so it'd help me to relax by just watching first."
1-03 grins. From a hidden panel in the wall, he takes a club and Rick and Morty take a step back, rattling the drain in the floor.
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Next Chapter: Summer's Project and Mute
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