Internal Selves
Whitney’s (Pov)
Again a very tension filled silence ensues. I don’t know for a fact but I assume the one question that he never wanted me to ask I just did.
I do not care anymore if he does not want to answer my questions if I don’t get the answers I seek then I will not be a corporative captive like I have been so far.
No if he refuses to give me even the slightest bit of information I will make it my mission to make him miserable and more likely than not get into some hot water with his "master" I will try to escape him even if it kills me.
Eitan regards me with an expressionless face or what I assume would be an expressionless face would it not be for that damn black cloak of his! What right does he have to conceal his identity from me? He gets to do anything he wants with my life, and I do not even get the courtesy to see the man that I have no doubts will ruin my life if not end it.
He leans his head back and his hood follows. The light within the room seems to dim to an ethereal glow it is almost as if someone is suffocating the light as well any positive vibe or feeling with it. I feel a tremor go down my spine and an eerie feeling consumes me, something is not right.
My senses go on alert something is very wrong, is Eitan doing this? I look at him with an open stare I know my eyes must convey the insecurities and plain fear I am experiencing; did I just make a fatal move?
"You are not ready for the answers to that particular question trust me on this." His voice lowered two octaves, my mother is a choir teacher I know. I think on what he said, he may be right but being in the dark hasn’t done me any good so far. It is not as if him telling me will change my fate, or will it?
Is that why he won’t answer the question because he knows if he did it could somehow hurt his plans for this Lord Tempest plans?
"Eitan stop it, whatever you are doing to the room, stop it." I start to feel suffocated along with everything else and I feel panic, but I turn it into angry and direct it and the person who has caused it.
"Are you asking me Miss Whitney or are you telling me." To the normal ear it would have sounded like nothing in his tone has changed, but to me for whatever reason I know there is a difference but it is not a threat it is almost humorous, how dare he.
"I doubt that matters, you aren’t going to stop anyways are you?" I cross my arms over my chest out of frustration and feeling sorry for myself and in an attempt to conmfort myself.
"This whole situation will only be as difficult and miserable as you make it Whitney if you want me to answer your questions or preform an action you have to give me a reason. In this world you get nothing for free, for anything that is not an equal value to that which you seek."
This whole situation vaguely reminds me of my previous interaction with Kieran when me and him made a deal and it did not end up well on my part. It ended with me giving Kieran my first kiss and then Kieran lying and not keeping his end of the deal. I don’t think it would be wise to take that route again, but it seem making deals is common in this world or just common to demons.
I think over Eitan’s words what could I give that is equal to the answers I seek, maybe he has a question he seeks from me to have answered? But what questions could he have that I could haggle for? I guess the logically thing would be to ask him if there is an answer he seeks that only I could give him.
I hesitantly think on how to approach him with my answers I have to say something I know I was on "strike" against him, but this is an opportunity to get my answers. I cannot pass the opportunity up, can I? No I can’t, I have decided to take my chances when they present themselves to me.
"Then what to you want in return is it my compliance that will get me the answers that I want because fine, I promises to comply to the best of my abilities." I have to hold the sarcastic tone in my voice it is just natural to me when I do not like a person.
"Your compliance would be helpful but it is not necessary, and I am afraid to tell you that it does not hold the same value."
"Then what would hold the same value, do you want a question answered from me?"
His hood tilts maybe that is a sign that he is thinking that over or he is about to lunge at my throat, though the latter seems more likely that doesn’t stop my overactive as well as morbid imagination from creating very unseemly thoughts.
"If you answer my question I will answer one of your previous, if I get no answer or one I deem dishonest I will end this little game you wish to play. Do we have a deal?"
I take in a breath begging it to give me courage as I do. "Yes we have a deal but I will follow your rules, if the question you ask is not equal mine I will not answer it."
He lets out a breathy sound could that have been a laugh, doubtfully I mean with his monotone voice a laugh just doesn’t not see feasible. Maybe it was just a grunt of annoyance that has to be it.
"Very well do you wish for me to start?"
"Yes ask your question."
"What is your level of relationship with that demon?"
My forehead scrunches along with my eyebrows “What demon?"
He releases an irritated sigh "I do not know his name but the one that dare challenged me, the one you have been with since the beginning."
"Will, his name is Will." I whisper it feeling very sad and lonely it feels so long and far since I have last seen him. My mind swirls with all the possible outcomes of his wellbeing but Eitan stops all those with his next words.
"I do not care of his name, are you going to answer my question or are we ending our game?"
My mind reels and searches for answer I mean it should be simple we are practically strangers there is nothing to really reveal, but inside of me I feel wrong to say anything on the matter, it just feels really personal and intimate something Eitan has no right to know. Why does he want to know, how could that as a question be equal to any of my possible questions? I don’t know but I guess I will give him the truth or what I believe is the truth.
"We-we are friends I guess. I do not know him well I-I we are just friends."
"You did not know him in your world?"
"No I had only met him the night I- we were both taken to this world, we were stranger to each other before this."
"Strangers" he mutters more to himself than I. Why does this matter to him, maybe he wants to know how deep our relationship is because he wants to know if Will would be a problem to him. Maybe he is gauging how much of a threat he is and how likely it would be that he would come after me.
Would he even come for me? Why would he, it is as I said were practically strangers barely friends.
Stop, stop Whitney you cannot let your thoughts turn that way whether Will comes or doesn’t it is not up to him to help me, it is me that must get myself out this situation.
"Yes strangers now I hope you’re pleased with your question and its answer, now I want my question answered."
"Very well but remember it must be of equal value to mine I would not push your luck if I were you."
Pompous ass, I cannot help but think of a million foul names to call him. What is up with this world and demons do they not know how to keep one personality at a time. First with Kieran and now Eitan one second he is a serious robot and the next he acts like a well bread prince.
I release a sigh it is not worth getting worked up over I cannot lose my heart and head to my emotions. The more I control I can keep over anything right now the better off I should be.
"What did you do before, why did the room become-unnerving I guess?" I am not satisfied with my example of how I felt before because it seemed and felt like so much more than a small case of anxiety it was horrid to tell the truth.
"I did not do anything before."
"What do you mean you didn’t do anything I felt it the room changed completely not visually but the vibe the feeling? Don’t lie to me I thought you were going to follow through on our deal I should have expected as much."
I spat at him in an accusation the dirty cheat of a demon, why do I keep doing this do myself obviously demons cannot be trusted and will always cheat you in the end or just me.
"I am not lying to you I did nothing to the room previously it-" I see his chest rise and fall and his hands that rested on his knee they crawl inward to pierce his palms.
They look so tight and tense I am expecting to see red blood leak from his newly made fist; what is wrong now?"
"It was not me that changed the mood of the room it- it was you."
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Will's (Pov)
I lift my head further from the ground to take in the establishment, it is very bright and lively. This is certainly a shock from how empty and dead the town outside that door is.
I was expecting a glooming dim lilted place and if I suspected it was a bar I would have thought it to be a dark pub like atmosphere.
The place is simple in its own right it has traditional darker stained wood floors that mirrors the floor length bar that stretches across the whole room and it is massive with plenty of bartenders and barmaids to serve the packed establishment.
I lift my head further and see tray lined ceilings with intricate medallions to break it up and several strategy placed chandeliers with long candles that are providing the lively glow and feel.
I see chairs stacked up to one side of the room opposite to the bar. I am confused at first to see the chairs like that but then seeing all the men and women dancing and moving about I understand their reasoning.
My eyes are wide with curiosity I see men and women cantering about without a care in the world. Some are either wear a bright joyful smile or they are laughing like there will be no tomorrow it is a stark difference from the daytime.
Everyone is dressed in flashy bright variations of what I saw the people wear in the town previously; before I didn’t see a shade more than grey, brown, or black.
Now it is shades of yellow, bright blue, vibrant red, and green that I hate to admit but the shade of green instantly reminds me of a certain pair of eyes Whitney.
Guilt and pain hit me I want to just be able to forget all this at least just for a little while. My mouth waters at the thought of having the same tight burning trail warm from my throat to my stomach.
Then I miss the feeling that follows the carefree light feeling like nothing can go wrong and nothing bad can happen to me; god I miss that feeling. Maybe just a few drinks wouldn’t hurt, and then I can get a little liquid energy to keep looking for Whitney.
Just one drinks just one moment of peace just one minute to not feel anything. I lift myself up and drag myself to the bar counter I ignore the mysterious stares people give me. I also ignore the silence of the room that follows as I pass by.
They must be human and they must know I am not. I don’t care I just want one thing, a good strong drink. I reach the counter and a barman that is dressed in a fine tailored dark blue velvet suit regards me with fear and uncertainty.
I simply nod at him and look at the rows and array of liquors I don’t have much of a preference at this point anything to just take the edge off me but I have always be more of a vodka man.
I don’t even know if they have that here but I see a fat thick clear bottle with crystal clear liquid. That’s it that is what I have been craving part of me feels like a starved crazed animal the way I am fixated on this drink but I cannot keep it from my mind it is like it is my life sustenance and if I don’t get it I won’t live.
The bartender as if reading my thoughts or gaze shifts carefully backwards and to my desired bottled he takes it softly and places it on the counter just off to the right of me like he is afraid I will snap and strike him. I assume from the look on his face he doesn’t care if I pay or not he just wants me to get the hell out of here.
I think I will give him what he wants I grip the neck of the bottle and dash back the way I came doing the same to avoid the gazes of the patrons in this fine establishment. I walk right through the same door without hesitating and with confidence. Who knew just the idea of drinking could make me change so quickly.
Once outside I move out of the ally and down the street with one destination on my mind the pier, a waterfront view to help drown my sorrows, again just for a moment. I haven’t forgotten the whole reason behind my need to forget; Whitney.
I smell the ocean before I see it I look at the empty docking place and piers. I sit at the edge dangling my feet that are nowhere near long enough to graze the water below.
I feel even more like a failed man and a useless ass more than ever before and the guilt is overwhelming but none of those emotions stop me from ripping the cork off the bottle of liquor and bringing the rim to my awaiting mouth.
I hesitate for a mere second when a vision of Whitney enters my mind, but I shake it away as quickly as it came and thrust my head back. The alcohol rushes to follow my movement and then the all too familiar burn and warmth engulf me.
As I take the liquid without taking a breath, in the back of my mind comes a voice that is familiar but belongs to a stranger at the same time.
"Finally, I get to come out and find my Peach."
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“When a warrior learns to stop the internal dialogue, everything becomes possible; the most far-fetched schemes become attainable.”
~Carlos Castaneda~
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FIRST VOTE, COMMENT, AND FAN.
Authors note: So short but hopefully sweet. I hope you enjoyed it and I hope you understand the end of Will’s pov and what it means if you don’t then let me know I didn’t want it to be confusing. Anyway please leave a comment I need feedback on this story. Please and thank you as always.